AFTER  TWENTY  YEA  «*^ 


By    GEORGE    >,.    MIBDLETON 


I 


Digitized  by  tlie  Internet  Arcliive 

in  2007  witli  funding  from 

IVIicrosoft  Corporation 


littp://www.arcliive.org/details/aftertwentyyearsOOmiddiala 


AFTER  TWENTY 
YEARS 

A  Dissertation  on  the  Philosophy 
of  Life  in  Narrative  Form 


BY 

GEO.  W.  MIDDLETON,  M.D. 


PRESS  OF  THE  DESERET  NEWS 
Salt  Lake  City,  Dec.  10.  1914 


Copyright,  1914, 
By  George  W.  Middleton. 


PREFACE 

THE  purpose  of  this  volume  is  to  discuss  the 
philosophy  of  life  in  a  concrete  way,  avoid- 
ing as  I  hope  the  tediousness  that  must  attach  to 
dissertations  on  honesty  and  charity  and  courage 
and  the  many  virtues  and  vices  of  society  when  pre- 
sented in  the  abstract. 

An  attempt  has  been  made  to  weave  into  the  warp 
of  narrative  my  woof  of  philosophy,  with  what  suc- 
cess I  must  leave  the  reader  to  judge. 

The  question  naturally  arises.  Are  these  real  char- 
acters, and  the  answer  is  that  in  the  main  they  are. 
I  have  reserved  the  right,  however,  to  vary  my 
colors  and  to  modify  my  pattern  according  to  my 
own  design. 

Since  my  temporary  residence  has  been  in  many 
different  places,  it  is  not  to  be  presumed  that  all  the 
subject  matter  was  collected  in  any  one  geographical 
location. 

The  objection  will  be  raised  that  it  is  a  patchwork, 
and  I  plead  guilty  to  the  charge.  I  hope,  however, 
that  the  colors  have  been  painted  with  sufficient 
iii 


PREFACE 

vividness  to  compensate  for  the  lack  of  solidarity 
which  must  appear. 

To  my  friends  I  wish  to  say,  Read  it  critically,  and 
see  if  you  do  not  discover  at  least  some  fragment  of 
yourself  in  the  pattern.  Our  conception  of  life  is  a 
component  thing,  reflecting  something  of  every  per- 
son we  have  known,  and  holding  out  certain  ideals 
which  transcend  all  personality. 

If,  therefore,  the  reader  has  been  my  friend  or  my 
enemy,  he  will  find  himself  mixed  up  to  a  certain 
greater  or  less  extent  in  the  character  colors  which 
I  have  tried  to  work  into  the  pattern. 

I  make  my  appeal  especially  to  young  people,  who 
have  the  problems  of  life  all  unsolved  before  them, 
and  trust  that  I  may  shed  some  light  upon  those 
shaded  sections  of  the  pathway  of  life  where  we 
grope  in  the  darkness  and  apprehend  blindly. 

I  have  attempted  to  make  my  climax  come  in  the 
dissertation  on  religion  and  philosophy,  in  which  I 
have  tried  to  steer  clear  of  all  tradition  and  of  con- 
ventional forms,  and  to  look  at  the  momentous  prob- 
kms  involved  purely  from  the  rational  viewpoint. 

I  do  not  mean  by  this  that  there  is  nothing  in 
tradition,  but  that  I  chose  to  put  forth  an  entirely 
different  line  of  argument  for  the  proof  of  Deity 
and  the  hope  of  immortality. 

iv 


PREFACE 

If  there  is  anything  which  I  have  said  unwittingly, 
which  might  be  offensive  to  any  of  my  readers,  I 
beg  them  to  read  the  text  again  and  see  if  it  is  not 
the  other  fellow  aimed  at.  We  often  take  things  to 
ourselves  which  were  never  intended  for  us  at  all. 
In  advance  I  humbly  crave  the  pardon  of  anybody 
who  might  find  occasion  for  offense,  because  nothing 
is  meant  to  cast  any  reflection  on  any  living  person. 

I  commend  myself  to  the  charity  of  my  readers, 
trusting  that  they  will  pardon  my  weak  points  and 
find  some  satisfaction  in  the  viewpoint  of  life  which 
has  come  to  me  after  much  thought  and  reflection. 

I  am  indebted  very  much  to  my  esteemed  friend 
Prof.  John  Henry  Evans  for  suggestions  as  to  ar- 
rangement of  materials,  and  for  many  corrections  of 
syntax  and  form  which  he  has  made.  The  editing 
has  been  entirely  under  his  direction. 

To  my  many  friends :  I  thank  you  all  for  the  con- 
tributions you  have  unwittingly  made  in  conversa- 
tion and  in  the  display  of  all  those  little  nameless 
courtesies  of  life  which  are  hereby  acknowledged 
with  due  appreciation. 

G.  W.  M. 


CONTENTS 

I.  The  Petals  of  the  Daisy 1 

11.  The  Village  Butterfly 12 

III.  The  Man  Who  Never  Had  a  Chance. .  21 

IV.  The  Easiest  Way 33 

V.  Rags  on  the  Family  Tree 50 

VI.  The  Greater  Satisfaction 79 

VII.  A  Stone  which  the  Builders  Rejected  109 

VIII.  The  Winner  of  Real  Victories 133 

IX.  Satellites  and  Luminaries 173 

X.  The  Years  that  bring  Wisdom 200 

XI.  On  the  Anvil  of  Thought 239 

XII.  Retrospective 286 


Vll 


AFTER  TWENTY  YEARS 


CHAPTER  I 

THE  PETALS  OF  THE  DAISY. 

I  AM  in  the  mood  of  memories  today.  The  great 
record  of  the  past  has  opened  its  pages  before 
me.  Recollection  is  throwing  its  pictures  upon  the 
niental  screen,  and  bringing  out  some  with  a  clear- 
ness that  transcends  all  the  rest. 

It  is  a  strange  thing  how  the  incidents  of  life  fix 
themselves  in  our  memory  as  permanent  assets  or 
deficits.  Some  things  that  seemed  to  loom  so  big 
that  they  occupied  our  whole  attention  and  were 
for  the  time  being  the  only  things  in  the  world  are 
now  blotted  out  completely  from  the  page  and  come 
back  to  us  from  the  tradition  of  others  as  alien 
experiences,  which  we  look  upon  as  disinterested 
spectators  and  do  not  recognize  as  a  part,  at  one 
time  a  most  important  part,  of  our  own  biography. 

Then  there  are  other  things  so  trivial,  so  devoid 
1 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

of  interest  or  value  to  us  now  that  we  would  gladly 
discard  them  as  rubbish,  but  they  cling  to  us  and 
will  not  be  cast  out. 

The  casket  of  memory  has  a  wonderful  and 
varied  stock  of  fragments  of  things — of  stories  half 
told,  of  comedies,  of  tragedies,  of  pages  gilded  with 
romance  and  painted  with  the  colors  of  the  morning, 
of  sheets  blotted  and  marred  by  crime,  and  black 
and  grimy  with  the  record  of  life's  mistakes,  and 
life's  mischances.  It  has  fragments  of  shafts  of 
envy  that  were  hurled  at  our  unoffending  heads.  It 
has  tokens  of  love  and  respect  that  brought  gladness 
and  faith  into  our  life,  and  gave  us  courage  to  fight 
on,  and  to  keep  up  the  struggle.  It  has  pictures  of 
faces  that  have  faded  out  of  our  life  in  the  long 
distant  past.  It  has  trinkets  and  locks  of  hair  that 
hark  back  to  the  land  of  the  departed. 

And  how  well  its  contents  are  preserved  from  the 
ravages  of  time!  The  flowers  which  came  to  me 
as  the  messenger  of  a  friend's  esteem  were  beautiful 
to  behold  as  they  reflected  the  colors  of  the  rainbow 
from  their  gorgeous  petals  and  filled  the  air  with 
their  scented  breath.  Ephemeral  delights !  In  a  few 
brief  hours  they  were  all  withered  and  their  mes- 
sage of  sentiment  completely  blotted  out.  But  in  the 
casket  of   memory   they   are   imperishable.     They 

2 


THE     PETALS     OF     THE     DAISY 

shine  with  all  the  lustre  of  their  pristine  days,  and 
glisten  with  the  morning  dew  as  when  they  first 
unfolded  their  mysterious  forms,  and  opened  their 
gaudy  faces  to  greet  the  awakening  sun. 

As  the  memory  pictures  are  thrown  one  by  one 
upon  the  screen,  I  select  from  among  the  number, 
perhaps  the  most  vivid,  at  any  rate  the  most  inter- 
esting in  its  far-reaching  outgrowth  of  the  score 
and  more  of  years  that  have  touched  its  component 
parts  as  with  a  magician's  wand  and  transformed 
some  of  them  into  gold  dust  and  some  of  them  into 
rust,  and  some  of  them  into  black  spots  that  mar 
and  deface  the  screen. 

It  is  the  picture  of  a  group  of  happy  children 
playing  in  a  meadow  in  a  summer  morning  long, 
long  ago.  The  sun  is  pouring  its  golden  glory  over 
the  eastern  hills,  and  the  birds  are  filling  the  air  with 
liquid  melody.  Dew  drops  are  hanging  like  pol- 
ished diamonds  from  every  green  leaf  and  from 
every  gorgeous  petal. 

How  like  a  scene  from  the  land  of  fairies  was 
this  glorious  morning  landscape,  as  the  children 
gamboled  and  played! 

Once  only  in  life  can  we  shake  off  the  dross  of 
the  world,  and  feel  the  true  relationship  between 
heaven  and  earth!     But  when  the  gates  that  have 

3 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

been  left  ajar  are  closed  behind  us,  and  we  go  out 
of  the  land  of  the  spirit  into  the  domain  of  material 
things,  the  dream  of  heaven  is  left  behind.  Some- 
times its  echoes  reverberate  from  the  land  of  slum- 
ber, and  break  in  upon  our  night  visions  and  some- 
times in  day  dreams  the  message  comes  again.  But 
it  is  capricious,  and  its  beautiful  melody  is  drowned 
in  the  discordant  noises  of  the  world.  When  we 
have  known  the  satiety  of  the  temporal  life  and 
perceived  the  gossamer  texture  of  the  mundane  web, 
what  would  we  not  give  for  a  look  through  the 
pearly  gates  which  were  open  to  us  when  our  young 
life  still  lingered  on  the  threshold?  But  we  must 
be  content  to  walk  by  faith  and  not  by  actual  knowl- 
edge, until  the  veil  shall  have  been  raised  again 
and  the  haze  lifted  that  has  rested  all  these  years 
over  our  comprehension. 

This  happy  group  of  children  are  playing  the  old 
game  of  fortune  with  the  wild  daisies  from  the 
meadow.  They  are  plucking  the  petals  one  by  one, 
and  repeating  the  old  familiar  rhyme,  "A  rich  man, 
a  poor  man,  a  beggar  man,  a  thief,"  etc.,  with  the 
idea  that  the  name  corresponding  to  the  last  petal 
should  indicate  the  station  in  life  that  Fate  has  in 
store  for  them. 

How  natural  it  was  in  those  unreasoning  days  to 
4 


THE     PETALS     OF    THE    DAISY 

connect  things  as  cause  and  effect  that  have  no 
bearing  apon  one  another!  Because  this  tangible 
thing  that  has  a  material  basis  is  true,  this  other  in- 
tangible thing  of  the  mental  or  spiritual  basis  must 
be  true  also,  even  though  there  is  nothing  in  the 
circumstance  or  the  constitution  of  things  to  cor- 
relate them.  Even  the  mature  mind  does  not  wholly 
divest  itself  of  this  fallacious  method  of  reasoning. 
It  is  the  old  proposition  of  proving  that  three  is 
greater  than  ten  by  turning  a  stick  into  a  serpent. 

When  we  look  over  the  record  of  that  great  strug- 
gle of  humanity  for  knowledge  of  Deity  and  destiny 
which  began  with  the  dawn  of  consciousness,  we 
are  amazed  to  find  how  very  much  of  the  time  and 
energy  of  the  world'  have  been  expended  to  estab- 
lish the  correlation  of  sequence  in  events  and  things 
which  in  their  nature  are  entirely  distinct  and  sep- 
arate. 

The  eagerness  of  the  child  for  knowledge  of  the 
future — for  some  token  from  the  land  of  possibili- 
ties, for  some  foretaste  of  the  satisfaction  of  con- 
quest or  dominion, — is  but  the  same  thing  as  the 
eagerness  of  the  adult  mind,  perceiving  the  evanes- 
ence  of  worldly  things,  for  some  foretaste  of  the 
more  enduring  things  of  his  spiritual  inheritance. 
And  as  the  child  consults    the    necromancer,    the 

5 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

phrenologist,  the  Gypsy  fortune-teller,  and  even  the 
daisy's  petals  for  an  answer  to  his  eager  question, 
"What  is  my  lot  to  be?"  so  the  adult  mind  all 
through  the  world's  history  has  been  wont  to  consult 
the  spiritual  necromancer,  and  to  accept  as  gospel 
truth  the  evasive  answer  which  too  often  has  taken 
advantage  of  his  childish  credulity. 

It  is  a  lie,  a  falsehood !  The  story  of  the  daisy's 
petals  is  not  true,  as  the  future  pages  of  this  little 
book  are  to  show. 

The  eternal  chancellors  of  God  are  Cause  and 
Effect.  These  only  are  the  factors  that  are  to  de- 
termine our  destiny.  You  may  ask  the  sphinx  of 
the  future  by  way  of  his  high  priest  the  necroman- 
cer to  reveal  to  you  the  unwritten  chapters  of  your 
life,  and  the  only  true  answer  that  you  will  get  back 
is  the  answer  that  shall  come  of  your  own  life's 
effort.  When  God  gave  you  your  free  agency  and 
entrusted  you  with  the  responsibility  of  your  own 
destiny.  He  did  not  intend  to  prop  you  up  at  every 
turn  by  Providential  intervention,  to  correct  your 
errors  and  commend  you  at  once  for  your  virtues. 
Freedom  of  will  was  given  you  that  you  might  de- 
velop character.  No  man  ever  grows  in  power  only 
as  he  develops  initiative.  God  gives  you  the  oppor- 
tunity, but  he  will  not  thrust  advantage  upon  you. 

6 


THE     PETALS     OF     THE     DAISY 

So  when  men  and  women  are  seeking  to  bolster 
themselves  up  by  some  extraneous  force  which  is 
not  a  part  of  their  own  constitution,  they  are  trying 
to  shirk  the  responsibility  that  God  has  placed  upon 
them. 

One  of  the  most  interesting  studies  in  the  world 
is  to  watch  the  careers  of  those  who  have  been  the 
friends  of  our  childhood,  to  see  how  they  acquitted 
themselves  when  they  got  out  of  the  play  world  and 
were  confronted  with  the  really  serious  problems 
of  life.  How  interesting  and  profitable  to  turn  the 
kaleidoscope  of  time  round  by  decades  to  see  the 
new  arrangement  that  has  come !  If  we  could  have 
but  looked  into  the  future  when  we  stood  at  the 
threshold  of  life  where  everything  was  tinted  with 
rainbow  colors,  and  every  boy  and  girl  seemed  to 
have  their  future  fixed  by  the  circumstances  in  which 
we  found  them,  what  a  paradoxical  thing  the  next 
score  of  years  would  have  presented  to  us !  In  our 
childish  imagination  we  gave  first  rank  to  the  dandy 
who  dressed  well  and  danced  well  and  walked  with 
a  swagger.  How  many  dandies  we  have  seen  go  the 
way  of  the  world  and  seek  their  level  at  the  lowest 
stratum  of  the  social  scale,  and  how  many  uncouth 
boys  from  the  country  farm  have  we  seen  work 
their  way  to  the  very  first  rank  of  society  and  stand 

7 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

pre-eminent  as  professional  men,  as  financiers,  as 
educators ! 

It  was  our  inexperience  that  illuded  us.  If  we 
could  have  been  endowed  with  our  present  knowl- 
edge of  life,  we  could  have  put  a  proper  value  upon 
them.  From  the  arc  that  appeared  we  could  have 
caluculated  the  whole  circle.  For  the  underlying 
principles  of  success  or  failure  are  as  precise,  and 
the  deductions  that  can  be  drawn  from  them  as  ac- 
curate, as  the  principles  of  geometry. 

As  we  look  back  over  the  vista  of  the  years,  the 
first  startling  fact  that  confronts  us  is  the  number 
of  our  friends  who  have  been  gathered  in  by  the 
grim  reaper.  As  children  we  watched  the  sparks 
of  burning  soot  on  the  back  of  the  chimney  and 
imagined  they  were  contending  armies  in  deadly 
conflict.  Each  instant,  in  the  twinkling  of  an  eye, 
a  soldier  went  to  his  doom,  and  the  ranks  were 
filled  by  others  eager  for  the  fight.  The  iron  hand 
of  Fate  has  dealt  just  so  with  our  friends. 

The  inventory  of  our  friends  of  twenty  years  ago 
presents  some  wonderful  transformations.  Some 
have  lived  a  life  of  resistance  and  placed  themselves 
counter  to  the  world  and  the  people  of  the  world, 
and  when  fortune  knocked  at  their  door  they  have 
sternly  refused  to  admit  her.     Some  have  adapted 

8 


THE     PETALS     OF     THE     DAISY 

themselves  readily  into  the  circumstances  in  which 
they  found  themselves,  and  prospered  in  the  things 
of  the  world  and  flourished  in  friendship.  It  is  a 
great  relief  to  meet  one  such,  who  has  faith  in  him- 
self and  believes  in  the  eternal  fitness  of  things. 
Some  have  drifted  from  their  spiritual  moorings  and 
foundered  on  the  rocks  of  modern  speculation.  Of 
the  controversy  in  their  minds  which  ended  in  the 
shipwreck  of  their  faith,  there  is  more  to  be  said 
in  the  pages  of  this  book.  Some  have  acquitted 
themselves  as  men  and  women  of  character  and 
taken  definite  stands  on  every  issue  that  confronted 
them.  Some  have  moved  along  the  lines  of  least 
resistance  and  responded  to  one  single  impelling 
motive,  their  unrestrained  desire.  Like  rudderless 
ships  they  have  been  subject  to  the  caprice  of  all 
the  winds,  with  no  chart  nor  compass  to  guide  them. 
Some  have  grown  thin  and  nervous;  some  have 
grown  fat  and  contented. 

I  am  standing  at  the  end  of  twenty  years  that  have 
swept  over  the  group  of  boys  and  girls  who  were 
my  schoolmates  and  playmates.  The  years  have 
flown  so  swiftly  by  that  one  gasps  to  think  of  the 
changes  they  have  wrought.  When  I  see  how  the 
etching  process  of  the  years  has  marked  deep  fur- 
rows in  the  forehead  of  my  friends,  and  sifted  the 

9 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

frosts  of  early  autumn  among  the  golden  tresses,  I 
become  aware  of  the  fact  that  I  am  subjected  to  the 
same  process,  and  must  change  as  they  are  chang- 
ing, and  as  all  the  world  is  changing  around  us. 
For  life  and  the  world  and  the  universe  are  all  un- 
stable things,  transforming  themselves  each  year, 
each  decade,  each  century  into  new  unprecedented 
forms,  developing,  evolving,  receding.  We  know 
that  we  are  in  a  great  process  that  must  have  some 
beneficent  ending,  we  know  there  must  be  some 
goal  toward  which  all  things  are  converging ;  but  we 
are  like  the  mote  upon  the  sunbeam,  we  can  see 
neither  the  source  nor  the  terminus  of  the  light  that 
illuminates  us.  For  God  has  seen  fit  to  safeguard 
His  secrets  by  covering  them  up  with  mysteries  un- 
fathomable. We  must  content  ourselves  for  the 
time  being  with  the  knowledge  that  life  is,  and  trust 
the  explanation  of  it  to  that  future  time  which  we 
see  by  the  eye  of  faith,  when  the  mists  shall  have 
rolled  away,  and  the  great  plan  that  correlates  life 
and  death  and  the  world  and  the  universe  shall 
stand  revealed.  We  must  act  on  the  presumption 
that  there  is  such  a  plan,  for  any  other  hypothesis 
would  be  inconsistent  with  reason. 

And  now  to  my  task  of  following  the  life  story  of 
the  group  of  happy  children  we  saw  playing  upon 

10 


THE     PETALS     OF     THE     DAISY 

the  meadow.  I  shall  call  the  roll  only  as  I  wish 
each  one  to  appear  on  the  stage  of  action.  I  shall 
avoid  the  dialogue  form  of  narrative  because  it  has 
been  so  universally  used  that  I  imagine  a  rest  from 
it  may  meet  the  approval  of  my  readers. 


11 


CHAPTER  II 


THE  VILLAGE   BUTTERFLY 


I  SELECT  at  random  a  little  girl  whom  for  con- 
venience we  shall  call  Harriet.  She  is  one  of  na- 
ture's favorites.  She  has  golden  locks  and  blue 
eyes  and  a  smile  that  captivates  every  one  who  comes 
within  the  range  of  its  irresistible  charm.  She  was 
much  patronized  and  petted.  It  seemed  to  her  that 
she  was  born  with  the  queenly  prerogative  and  that 
all  people  were  born  to  be  her  obedient  subjects. 
She  measured  the  world  by  her  little  sphere  of 
action,  and  she  did  not  comprehend  that  with  all  her 
charms  she  was  only  an  untutored  child  of  the  vil- 
lage and  that  her  glory  would  vanish  in  an  instant  if 
she  were  dislodged  from  her  primitive  setting. 

How  kind  it  is  of  Mother  Nature  to  surround  our 
blissful  self-satisfaction  with  a  Chinese  wall  of 
ignorance  to  prevent  us  from  learning  the  insignifi- 
cant role  the  best  of  us  are  to  play  in  the  great 
drama  of  life! 

Our  little  Harriet  grew  with  the  ebb  and  flow  of 
12 


THE   VILLAGE   BUTTERFLY 

the  seasons,  and  began  to  feel  the  emotions  and 
dream  the  dreams  of  budding  womanhood.  The 
peach  bloom  of  her  native  heath  had  incorporated 
its  gorgeous  coloring  into  the  pigment  of  her  cheeks, 
and  the  sunbeams  had  entangled  themselves  among 
her  golden  tresses.  Grace  of  motion  and  music  of 
voice  came  with  the  womanly  development.  Nature 
poured  out  her  bounties  unstinted  over  the  head  of 
this  untutored  child  and  made  her  the  pride  of  the 
village,  the  coveted  object  of  many  a  masculine 
desire. 

There  is  a  deep,  a  profound  meaning  in  this  lan- 
guage of  nature  interpreted  in  fine  femininity,  be 
it  the  endowment  of  the  peasant  or  of  the  princess. 
When  the  hour  of  its  glory  has  come,  the  rose  opens 
its  gorgeous  face  to  the  morning  sun,  and  freights 
the  breeze  with  its  scented  breath.  It  invokes  the 
occult  chemistry  of  nature  to  extract  from  the  dull 
clod  of  earth  ambrosial  nectars  for  the  bee  and  fra- 
grance for  the  passing  stranger.  It  borrows  the 
most  gorgeous  colors  to  adorn  itself.  It  looks  with 
derision  at  the  artist  and  the  sculptor  in  their  vain  at- 
tempts to  imitate  its  perfect  contour,  as  it  sways  with 
the  breezes  of  the  spring  time. 

And  all  this  because  it  has  a  message  to  deliver, 
13 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

a  divine  function  to  fulfill.  It  must  purchase  the 
aid  of  the  insect  to  send  its  love  message  to  its  kin- 
dred rose  upon  another  stem.  It  must  put  the  su- 
preme effort  of  its  life  into  this  love  story,  that 
others  of  its  kind  may  live,  that  its  name  and  gen- 
eration may  be  perpetuated,  and  that  its  delight 
may  not  vanish  from  the  earth,  but  that  it  may  aug- 
ment as  the  generations  come  and  go. 

And  this  is  the  language  of  nature  to  you,  my 
maiden  friend.  This  is  the  meaning  of  the  peach 
blossom  upon  your  cheek,  of  the  golden  glory  that 
adorns  your  head.  This  is  the  divine  motion  that 
is  stirring  within  you.  It  is  your  privilege,  it  is  your 
prerogative,  it  is  your  bounden  duty  to  claim  your 
birthright,  to  borrow  the  colors  of  the  autumn  forest 
to  adorn  yourself,  to  invoke  the  Muses  for  their  aid, 
to  appropriate  all  that  art  has  got  to  embellish  na- 
ture, that  your  love  message  may  be  directed  to  one 
worthy  to  receive  it,  that  the  greatest  of  all  your 
contributions  to  the  world  may  not  be  of  an  inferior 
kind,  that  your  generation  may  be  a  unit  in  an 
ascending  scale  of  intellect  and  soul,  that  the  social 
and  intellectual  arc  which  you  have  subtended  may 
be  widened  and  expanded  by  those  who  are  to  follow 
you. 

And  now  we  find  our  charming  little  Harriet 
14 


THE   VILLAGE   BUTTERFLY 

standing  at  the  threshold  of  womanhood,  with  all 
the  emotions  and  instincts  of  that  wondrous  epoch 
vibrating  within  her.  Little  does  she  know  the 
meaning  of  that  hidden  language  of  nature,  which 
speaks  in  eloquent  words  from  the  rosy  cheek,  from 
the  graceful  contour  of  her  form.  What  wonder  if 
she  is  sometimes  proud  and  disdainful!  The  hom- 
age of  the  country  swain  seems  naturally  to  her,  in 
her  meagre  experience,  to  be  an  indicator  of  the 
estimate  the  world  has  put  upon  her.  She  seems  to 
reign  as  a  queen  with  all  her  willing  subjects  at  her 
feet  ready  to  do  homage. 

The  most  autocratic,  aristocratic  person  on  the 
face  of  the  earth  is  the  belle  of  a  country  town,  as 
the  young  man  who  has  experienced  her  disdain  can 
well  attest.  But  we  can  pardon  that  vanity  when 
we  get  the  perspective  of  the  years,  and  the  larger 
outlook  on  life  that  comes  with  our  widening  circle 
of  acquaintance.  We  can  see  now,  as  she  also  can 
see,  how  the  glory  of  the  country  belle  would  vanish 
in  a  moment  if  she  were  transplanted  from  her  rural 
setting  into  the  polished  life  and  be  estimated  by  the 
fine  social  requirements  of  her  sisters  of  the  city. 

Make  the  most  then  of  your  hour  of  glory,  my  little 
disdainful  friend.  You  are  like  a  butterfly  upon  the 
wing,  but  one  day  the  gorgeous  many-colored  wings 

IS 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

you  are  disporting  will  be  withered  and  useless,  and 
you  will  come  down  to  the  level  of  other  mortals, 
perhaps  to  crawl  as  a  dull  grub,  with  nothing  but 
the  memory  of  your  superlative  hour  to  console  you ! 
We  will  pardon  your  pride,  and  think  charitably  of 
your  disdain.  Perhaps  you  did  better  than  any 
other  mortal  would  have  done  under  the  same  cir- 
cumstances. 

The  suitors  of  our  little  Harriet  are  all  the  swains 
of  the  village,  and  she  is  permitted  to  take  her 
choice,  for  any  one  of  them  would  count  himself 
most  lucky  to  receive  the  least  indication  that  his 
advances  were  approved.  Which  shall  it  be?  God 
help  her  to  decide  that  question,  which  has  held  in 
its  answer  the  happiness  or  the  misery  of  so  many 
untold  thousands  of  souls.  It  is  ordinarily  a  game 
of  blind  man's  buff,  in  which  we  grope  in  the  dark 
and  apprehend  without  seeing.  It  is  a  lottery  in 
which  are  many  blanks  and  only  a  few  real 
prizes. 

Which  of  all  these  young  men  are  to  be  winners 
in  the  game  of  life,  and  which  are  destined  to  recede 
and  go  down  to  ignominious  defeat?  The  pages 
of  this  little  book,  I  hope,  will  be  an  aid  to  all  those 
who  are  hanging  uncertain  on  this  momentous  prob- 
lem.    That  old  scripture  which  says  the  last  shall 

16 


THE   VILLAGE   BUTTERFLY 

be  first  and  the  first  shall  be  last  is  wonderfully 
true  of  life.  But  how  is  the  girl  emerging  from 
her  'teens  to  analyze  the  method  of  life  of  each  in- 
dividual suitor  and  choose  the  winner  from  among 
the  group? 

This  matter  of  the  choice  of  a  life's  companion  is 
one  that  is  looked  upon  with  altogether  too  much 
levity.  The  preliminary  negotiations  which  lead  up 
to  this  most  serious  step  in  life  are  regarded  too 
often  as  a  joke.  When  a  young  man  begins  to  call 
on  a  young  lady  he  thus  furnishes  for  his  friends  and 
for  her  friends  a  capital  occasion  for  jesting.  The 
social  circle  to  which  they  belong  look  upon  it  with 
lightness,  and  lose  no  occasion  to  make  them  the  sub- 
ject of  such  witticisms  as  they  can  invent. 

But  to  the  young  people  themselves,  who  stand 
breathless  on  the  threshold  of  this  new  phase  of 
life,  it  is  the  one  great  event,  which  overshadows  all 
the  other  affairs  of  their  life.  If  we  buy  mer- 
chandise and  discover  that  we  have  made  a  mistake, 
we  can  in  time  repair  our  fortune;  and  often  the 
experience  gained  is  a  more  valuable  asset  in  our 
life  than  the  commodity  would  have  been.  But  woe 
be  to  the  man  or  the  woman  who  makes  a  bad  bar- 
gain in  the  matrimonial  market.  It  were  better  that 
a  millstone  were  tied  around  their  neck  and  that  they 

17 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

were  cast  into  the  sea.  Every  day  we  see  matri- 
monial barks  foundering  on  the  shoals  of  circum- 
stance, because  the  partners  to  the  venture  were  not 
properly  matched.  If  we  had  some  means  of  test- 
ing the  condition  affinity  as  we  test  the  electric  po- 
tential of  certain  objects  with  the  galvanometer,  our 
mating  for  life  would  be  a  more  simple  problem. 
In  this  matter  we  are  ruled  too  much  by  emotion  and 
not  enough  by  reason.  The  one  objection  to  young 
marriages  is  that  the  choice  is  made  before  judg- 
ment has  developed  sufficiently  to  weigh  the  conse- 
quences. 

It  is  only  fair  to  say  on  the  other  hand  that  the 
plasticity  of  youth  may  enable  people  to  mold  their 
temperament  into  harmony,  and  whether  by  intuition 
or  by  chance  or  by  Providence,  young  marriages 
often  turn  out  to  be  satisfactory. 

To  young  people  who  aim  at  education,  or  train- 
ing for  a  profession,  marriage  should  be  postponed 
until  the  preparatory  work  is  consummated,  so  that 
they  begin  life  as  producers,  and  not  as  dead  weights 
retarding  their  own  progress.  How  often  do  we  see 
young  people  subjecting  themselves  to  all  kinds  of 
privations  and  hardships  in  their  college  work,  and 
destroying  all  the  romance  and  poetry  of  their  early 
married  life  in  the  struggle,  when  they  could  have 

18 


THE   VILLAGE   BUTTERFLY 

avoided  it  by  postponing  the  wedding  day  until 
after  the  college  work  was  completed ! 

The  prevalent  modern  idea  which  represents  the 
other  extreme  of  the  proposition,  that  young  people 
should  not  get  married  until  they  can  afford  to  live 
in  high  style  and  indulge  themselves  in  all  the  lux- 
uries of  well-to-do  people,  I  believe  to  be  equally 
wrong.  If  they  are  ready  to  enter  the  lists  as  pro- 
ducers, independent  of  other  people,  they  can  afford 
to  make  the  struggle  together,  and  the  training  that 
results  from  the  self-denial  they  are  obliged  to  ex- 
ercise will  be  a  great  asset  in  their  lives  in  the  after 
years. 

To  each  individual  the  plan  of  his  life  is  the  most 
serious  thing  that  confronts  him.  We  are  largely 
the  sculptors  of  our  own  character.  We  ought  at 
least  to  try  to  put  as  much  brains  into  the  serious 
problems  that  pertain  to  our  happiness  for  all  time 
as  we  would  in  decisions  that  have  commercial  value 
for  their  issue.  We  ought  to  develop  the  philosophy 
of  living,  and  in  all  our  social  arrangements  be  gov- 
erned by  reason  and  not  by  passion.  And  when  we 
approach  the  problem  of  the  choice  of  a  life's  com- 
panion we  should  be  sure  that  we  have  weighed 
carefully  all  the  consequences,  and  acted  up  to  the 
very  best  judgment  we  are  capable  of. 

19 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

And  this  was  the  problem  before  our  winsome 
little  Harriet  as  she  stood  at  the  end  of  her  'teens, 
and  indulged  in  the  gossamer  dreams  of  maiden- 
hood. Without  much  careful  consideration,  I  fear, 
she  faced  the  hazard  of  fate  and  made  her  choice, 
and  cast  her  lot  for  better  or  for  worse  with  one 
whom  for  convenience  we  will  call  Henry,  as  we 
review  his  outlook  on  life  and  follow  his  conclusions 
to  their  ultimate  consequences. 


20 


CHAPTER  III 

THE  MAN  WHO  NEVER  HAD  A  CHANCE 

LIKE  many  other  young  men  of  his  kind  Henry 
was  wont  to  attach  much  importance  to  his 
personal  appearance,  and  after  the  crude  method  of 
his  native  town,  he  dressed  the  best  and  danced  the 
best  of  the  boys  in  his  circle.  He  beUeved  that  edu- 
cation is  a  thing  Hmited  by  nature  to  certain  types  of 
people,  and  as  he  did  not  belong  to  that  particular 
class,  books  could  be  of  no  value  to  him.  It  was  his 
opinion  that  each  individual  in  this  world  is  born  to 
a  certain  station  in  life,  and  that  if  one  is  educated 
out  of  his  station  he  will  be  discontented  and  un- 
happy. He  rather  prided  himself  on  being  ignorant 
of  the  lore  of  books  and  sometimes  boasted  about  it. 

Having  no  regular  profession  or  trade  he  was 
obliged  to  seek  employment  at  one  thing  and  an- 
other, as  opportunities  presented  themselves,  and 
often  the  earnings  of  one  job  were  all  consumed 
before  he  got  another. 

Any  young  lady  in  choosing  her  life's  companion, 
who  thinks  that  happiness  is  going  to  abide  in  homes 
of  poverty  will  find  herself  in  general  mistaken. 
21 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

When  the  wolf  comes  in  at  the  door,  the  angel  of 
love  goes  out  at  the  chimney.  There  is  much  prac- 
tical sense  in  the  question  propounded  by  the  young 
woman  of  the  lower  class  of  England,  when  a  young 
man  comes  wooing,  "How  many  shillings  a  week 
does  he  have?"  No  young  man  is  a  fit  subject  for 
the  matrimonial  market  the  product  of  whose  toil  is 
not  sufficient  to  keep  the  wife  and  the  children  who 
are  to  depend  on  him  from  being  paupers. 

Our  poor  Henry  drifted  along  from  one  thing  to 
another.  Each  year  found  him  more  circumscribed 
than  the  one  before.  His  life  was  like  a  spiral  each 
circle  of  which  diminishes  in  circumference  regu- 
larly toward  a  vanishing  point.  He  became  pessim- 
istic, and  railed  against  fate.  He  blamed  everybody 
but  himself  for  the  hard  luck  which  seemed  always 
to  be  his  lot. 

Whenever  you  see  a  man  with  a  hard  luck  story, 
you  can  always  find  the  explanation  of  his  condition 
in  the  method  of  his  life.  But  these  hard  luck  fel- 
lows can  never  see  the  fault  in  themselves.  They 
will  blame  everything  and  everybody,  but  never  think 
of  blaming  themselves.  They  think  the  world  is  in 
a  conspiracy  against  them.  With  covetous  eyes  they 
look  at  the  possessions  of  other  people  and  attribute 
all  kinds  of  unholy  motives  and  methods  to  the  one 
22 


HE   NEVER   HAD   A   CHANCE 

who  succeeds.  They  always  think  they  never  had 
a  chance  in  the  world ;  that  fate  is  deliberately  hold- 
ing them  down;  that  society  is  organized  for  the 
express  purpose  of  thwarting  and  defeating  them. 

So  our  Henry  joined  the  rank  of  the  pessimists, 
and  got  much  satisfaction  out  of  telling  how  this 
and  that  prominent  man  had  gone  the  way  of  in- 
iquity. 

Our  Harriet  and  Henry  pulled  along  indifferently 
as  the  years  added  to  their  problem  hungry  mouths 
to  feed  and  shoes  and  clothing  to  be  purchased  for 
the  multitudinous  progeny  that  followed  in  their 
wake.  All  the  poetry  and  sentiment  had  gone  out 
of  their  lives,  and  the  experiences  of  each  day  were 
chapters  most  tedious  and  prosaic. 

And  now,  my  young  lady  friends,  I  want  to  tell 
you  a  secret  that  many  women  never  learn.  When 
the  fine  sentiment  of  budding  and  maturing  woman- 
hood was  with  you,  you  borrowed  the  colors  of 
the  rainbow  to  adorn  yourself,  and  studiously 
adopted  every  little  amenity  of  life  you  knew 
about.  You  studied  by  day  and  by  night  the  method 
of  making  yourself  most  attractive,  because  you 
wished  to  gain  the  favor  of  young  men  in  general 
and  of  one  young  man  in  particular.  When  she  has 
attained  the  end  desired,  the  average  woman  folds 

23 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

up  the  tinsel  and  the  feathers,  and  allows  the  fine 
gowns  to  become  seedy  and  moth  eaten.  She  sheds 
off  the  poetry  and  sentiment  of  her  life  as  the  rose- 
bush sheds  its  gorgeous  colored  petals  and  its  green 
leaves  in  preparation  for  the  winter  sleep,  and  re- 
tains only  the  dry  branches,  sometimes  with  thorns 
but  poorly  concealed.  And  when  she  goes  to  the 
ball  or  sociable,  she  thinks  that  society  is  conspiring 
against  her  because  she  is  not  sought  out  and  pat- 
ronized as  she  used  to  be.  She  does  not  reason  that 
bees  abandon  the  most  gorgeous  flower  when  the 
honey  is  all  exhausted  and  the  corolla  begins  to  fade. 
She  is  trying  to  make  water  run  up  hill.  And  the 
man  who  was  attracted  by  her  charms  and  cast  his 
lot  with  her  has  not  the  same  zest  as  he  used  to  have, 
and  she  thinks  he  has  gone  wrong  and  is  neglecting 
his  connubial  duties. 

Sometimes  it  is  listlessness  that  causes  women  to 
go  this  way;  sometimes,  it  is  unselfishness — the 
struggle  to  bestow  comfort  on  her  family  rising  to 
be  the  dominant  factor  in  her  life;  sometimes  it  is 
the  fault  of  others.  But  whatever  the  cause,  it  is 
wrong  in  principle.  If  the  adoption  of  taste  in  dress 
and  all  the  little  amenities  of  life  which  give  the 
charm  to  womanhood  were  necessary  to  fix  the 
young  man's  attention  before  marriage  the  same 

24 


HE   NEVER   HAD   A   CHANCE 

principle  holds  true,  with  emphasis,  after  marriage. 
For  the  association  which  was  only  occasional  has 
become  constant,  and  the  wish  to  be  pleased  has  not 
diminished  any  by  the  change. 

Thanks  to  the  keener  sense  of  life's  proprieties 
possessed  by  the  best  type  of  our  fine  womanhood, 
I  am  not  including  all  women  in  this  category.  I 
have  described  the  method,  I  hope,  of  only  a  small 
minority,  which  shall  be  still  more  diminished  as  our 
more  liberal  education  develops  the  idea  of  sex 
equality.  When  a  woman  learns  to  carry  the  charm 
of  her  youth  into  the  struggle  of  all  the  years,  it 
seems  to  me  that  she  has  found  the  true  philosophy 
of  life.  The  mission  of  woman  is  to  preach  the 
gospel  of  optimism  and  faith  both  by  precept  and 
example.  But  if  she  forsakes  her  birthright,  and 
joins  the  ranks  of  the  pessimists,  and  defies  the  laws 
of  nature,  she  voluntarily  abdicates  the  throne  which 
society  in  all  times  and  all  places  has  accorded  her 
the  right  to  occupy. 

And  when  men  grow  indifferent  in  the  same  way, 
and  allow  their  clothing  to  grow  seedy  and  their 
beards  to  grow  long,  and  all  the  sentiment  to  go  out 
of  their  life,  they  are  flying  in  the  face  of  a  great 
social  law,  and  they  will  have  to  pay  the  penalty,  for 
the  law  of  attraction  and  repulsion  is  as  certain  in 
25 


AFTER   TWENTY  YEARS 

its  application,  as  inexorable  in  its  demands,  as  the 
law  of  gravitation. 

And  this  was  the  fate  of  the  young  people  we  are 
describing.  Only  a  few  years  and  all  the  poetry 
and  sentiment  were  gone,  and  the  dull,  tedious  prose 
of  each  day  added  chapter  after  chapter  to  the 
meaningless  record  of  their  wasted  lives. 

Once  the  author  of  these  memoirs  was  called  pro- 
fessionally into  their  meagre  home.  A  little  un- 
fortunate child  lay  at  the  point  of  death,  and  the 
mutual  solicitude  had  momentarily  spanned  the  great 
gulf  that  had  opened  between  them. 

These  terrible  death-bed  tragedies  that  oftentimes 
come  into  our  homes  have  the  compensation  that 
they  bring  a  revivifying  of  faith  and  of  all  the  better 
attributes  of  the  soul.  The  dying  child  is  an  angel 
messenger,  delivering  back  some  of  the  glory  of 
heaven  before  it  bids  its  final  adieu.  In  that  hour  of 
darkest  trial  and  keenest  suffering  are  born  courage 
and  resolution  and  faith.  If  we  have  strength  of 
character,  these  will  be  permanent  assets,  but  if  we 
are  weak,  they  will  be  but  transitory  emotions,  sur- 
viving only  while  the  broken  sod  keeps  fresh  the 
memory  of  our  treasure  who  slumbers  beneath  the 
sanctified  mound.  And  this  home  of  squalor  was 
glorious  for  a  time  with  faith  and  resolution.  But 
26 


HE   NEVER   HAD   A   CHANCE 

the  dream  of  heaven  was  brief,  and  the  old  habitual 
groveling  spirit  came  back  again. 

They  showed  me  a  picture  taken  on  their  wed- 
ding day — the  bride  with  her  orange  blossoms  and 
her  fine  array,  and  the  groom  in  princely  attire  sit- 
ting manfully  by  her  side.  How  proud  they  must 
have  been  of  each  other  on  that  eventful  day,  and 
what  dreams  they  must  have  had  of  the  unfolding 
events  of  their  opening  career !  If  they  could  have 
had  a  vision  of  this  desolation  of  a  home  as  I  saw  it, 
I  wonder  if  they  could  have  endured  the  sight. 

In  the  air  castles  they  built,  in  the  successes  they 
anticipated,  two  important  factors  had  been  left  out 
of  their  calculations.  The  transcendent  importance 
of  industry  and  of  frugality  had  never  dawned  upon 
them. 

The  world  has  not  much  to  bestow  upon  the  man 
who  will  not  work.  It  is  the  get-up-and-get  that 
makes  men  great.  Go  to  the  home  of  the  successful 
farmer  and  you  will  find  the  dews  of  the  morning 
upon  his  rugged  brow.  You  will  see  the  last  glim- 
mer of  evening's  twilight  fall  upon  him  as  he  still 
bends  over  his  unfinished  task.  Go  to  the  home  of 
the  scholar  and  you  will  find  him  pouring  over  his 
books  in  the  silent  hours  of  the  night  when  all  the 
world  besides  is  hushed  in  slumber.     For  God  has 

27 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

set  a  price  upon  everything  in  this  world  that  is 
worth  having,  and  he  who  would  possess  must  pay 
the  price  of  the  thing*  he  covets. 

Again,  the  importance  of  frugality  as  a  factor  of 
success  cannot  be  overestimated.  If  your  compen- 
sation is  a  dollar  a  day,  and  you  live  on  seventy-five 
cents  a  day,  your  credit  will  gradually  grow  as  the 
balance  of  each  day  is  added  to  your  possessions. 
But  if  with  an  income  of  a  dollar  a  day  your  ex- 
penditure is  a  dollar  and  a  quarter  a  day,  you  will 
as  certainly  come  to  discredit  as  the  night  will  follow 
the  day.  Nature  deals  with  us  justly  but  not  mer- 
cifully. She  makes  cold  mathematical  deductions  in 
her  verdicts.  She  balances  the  ledger  with  unerring 
accuracy,  and  announces  the  verdict  at  the  close  of 
every  day.  She  fixes  our  credit  among  men  by 
these  daily  bulletins,  and  whether  we  will  or  not, 
we  must  submit  to  the  rating  she  puts  upon  us. 

Our  friends  had  failed  to  comprehend  the  value 
of  these  fundamental  principles  of  life.  By  slothful- 
ness  and  waste  they  had  reduced  their  possessions  to 
the  meagre  equipment  of  a  mean  home  where  years 
of  drudgery  were  endured  without  a  hope  of  better 
days. 

One  would  have  thought  that  such  an  inheritance 
of  such  a  home  with  all  its  perversion  of  sanity  of 

28 


HE   NEVER   HAD   A   CHANCE 

life  would  represent  the  greatest  misfortune  that 
could  come  to  the  children  who  swarmed  like  ants 
around  the  meagre  shack  which  was  supposed  to 
shelter  them.  One  asks  in  the  sight  of  God  and 
men  if  it  is  really  the  right  thing  to  bring  into  the 
world  such  a  horde  of  unfit  human  beings,  each  one 
of  whom  adds  to  the  importunities  of  all  the  rest. 
No  inspired  writer  nor  philosophical  teacher  has 
dared  to  dwell  upon  this  vital  social  problem. 

It  is  a  strange  thing  in  life  that  we  are  permitted 
by  social  usage  freely  to  discuss  and  without  hin- 
drance to  advocate  almost  everything  that  pertains 
to  the  material  welfare  of  the  human  race.  But  the 
one  most  fundamental  of  all  things,  the  reproduction 
of  human  beings,  has  been  so  hedged  about  by  tradi- 
tion that  we  have  not  dared  to  deal  with  its  problems 
in  a  scientific  way,  and  to  offer  suggestions  for  im- 
provement. 

It  is  a  good  augur  for  the  future  that  the  dim 
outlines  of  a  science  called  eugenics  have  begun  to 
take  form.  But  the  disciples  of  this  new  faith  are 
as  yet  so  modest  and  fearful  of  consequences  that 
they  make  very  few  positive  statements  and  hardly 
dare  to  advocate  their  principles  for  practical  appli- 
cation. 

And  so  the  substance  of  the  world  continues  to 
29 


AFTER   TWENTY  YEARS 

be  eaten  up  by  an  inferior  breed,  which  often  by  the 
haphazard  method  we  are  following  continues  to 
deteriorate,  while  the  best  elements  of  our  race 
physically  and  intellectually  are  shirking  this  re- 
sponsibility of  reproducing  their  kind.  If  any  drover 
adopted  such  methods  in  breeding  horses  and  cattle 
he  would  most  assuredly  make  a  failure. 

When  we  can  break  over  the  traditional  barriers 
and  give  as  much  thought  to  the  welfare  of  the 
human  race  as  we  do  to  horses  and  cattle,  we  shall 
take  a  great  stride  forward  in  our  civilization.  Com- 
pared with  the  dark  ages  we  may  consider  ourselve.-, 
highly  civilized,  but  compared  with  the  possibilities 
easily  within  our  reach  we  are  barbarians. 

For  this  unfortunate  family  whose  experiences  we 
have  been  detailing,  there  yet  remained  one  calamity 
which  was  to  cap  the  climax.  Wearied  with  the 
hardship  and  toil  and  the  disappointing  circum- 
stances of  her  life,  the  mother  fell  sick  and  died. 
The  meagre  comforts  which  she  had  managed  to 
maintain  were  taken  away,  and  the  unfortunate  chil- 
dren were  left  to  the  chance  assistance  of  charitable 
friends,  and  the  poor  assistance  they  could  bestow 
on  one  another. 

It  is  hard  to  see  Providence  in  such  an  occurrence, 
and  yet  we  may  judge  wrongly  by  seeing  only  part 

30 


HE   NEVER   HAD   A   CHANCE 

of  the  picture.  The  cruel  things  in  this  world  may 
have  their  counterpart  in  blessings  hereafter,  but  the 
remote  compensation  does  not  altogether  satisfy  our 
mind.  We  wish  to  see  justice  and  mercy  put  into 
action  immediately.  But  the  way  of  nature  is  one 
of  postponement.  We  desire  to  see  all  people 
happy,  but  it  is  the  decree  of  nature  that  many 
should  suffer.  Some  time,  some  where,  there  must 
be  a  compensation,  or  the  basis  of  this  whole  world 
fabric  would  be  injustice  and  cruelty.  We  must 
not  judge  hastily  the  plan  of  which  we  see  only  a 
fragment.  There  is  sufficient  basis  for  that  faith 
which  sees  eventually  the  triumph  of  justice  and 
right  in  the  manifest  intelligence  in  the  great  process 
of  the  world  construction.  So  much  adaptation  to 
purpose  we  cannot  imagine  without  a  beneficent  end 
toward  which  it  is  directed.  So  perfect  a  knowledge 
of  the  intricate  processes  of  nature  would  be  incom- 
patible with  cruelty  and  injustice.  We  can  afford 
to  rest  the  case  and  await  the  elucidation  which  is 
to  come  somewhere  in  the  process.  Meantime  it 
may  be  our  lot  to  suffer  and  to  supply  some  of  the 
minor  chords  in  the  great  symphony  of  life,  and  we 
should  do  it  without  complaining  in  the  assurance 
that  they  are  a  necessary  part  of  our  growth. 
And  here  at  this  crucial  point  we  will  leave  this 
31 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

unfortunate  family  group  until  the  curtain  rises 
again  at  the  finale  of  this  volume,  where  we  will  call 
the  roll  of  all  those  who  played  the  game  of  chance 
with  the  daisy's  petals  that  morning  in  the  summer 
sunshine.  We  shall  bring  them  in  review,  after 
long  years  have  rolled  away,  and  witness  the  final 
outcome  of  their  life's  method. 


32 


I 


CHAPTER  IV 

THE  EASIEST   WAY 

WISH  now  to  summon  another  witness  before 


this  tribunal  from  the  dim  distant  past.  I  want 
the  jury  which  shall  be  my  readers  to  hear  the  nega- 
tive evidence  of  one  whose  life  was  a  complete  ex- 
emplification of  what  men  ought  not  to  be.  For  con- 
venience we  will  call  him  Jim,  and  his  date  we  will 
put  back  twenty  years,  though  it  might  have  been 
farther. 

He  was  a  boy  of  commanding  personality,  and 
had  some  generous  impulses.  He  had  depth  of  in- 
tellect, but  not  depth  of  character.  He  always 
seemed  to  move  by  the  force  of  gravity  in  the  way  of 
least  resistance,  and  when  temptations  came  his  way 
he  simply  capitulated  without  an  effort  to  resist. 
Remorse  he  sometimes  felt,  and  resolutions  he  some- 
times made,  but  the  temper  of  his  mental  steel  was 
not  good,  and  he  could  not  maintain  a  negative  reply 
when  desires  were  calling. 

In  that  one  word  "No"  is  summed  up  more  that 
makes  for  success  in  life,  for  spiritual  growth,  for 
development  of  character,  than  in  all  the  other  words 
33 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

of  our  vocabulary.  And  yet  there  are  comparatively 
few  people  who  know  when  and  where  to  use  it  with- 
out mistakes.  The  difference  between  the  rich  man 
and  the  beggar,  whether  remote  or  present ;  the  dif- 
ference between  the  drunkard  and  the  man  of 
sobriety;  the  difference  between  the  saint  and  the 
sinner — is  all  a  matter  of  the  courage,  or  otherwise, 
to  maintain  a  negative  attitude  toward  the  things  we 
should  rule  out  of  our  life. 

Jim  was  the  son  of  a  mail  contractor  whose  home 
was  the  rendezvous  of  gold  seekers  and  gamblers 
and  saloon  men  and  all  the  riffraff  that  drift  with  the 
commercial  current  between  mining  camps.  And 
this  unwise  father  encouraged  his  son  to  lead  the 
life  of  dissipation  that  was  common  with  the  men 
who  made  up  his  patronage. 

Environment  is  such  a  potent  factor  in  the  devel- 
opment of  men  and  women  that  one  is  tempted  some- 
times to  rate  all  other  conditions  as  very  secondary 
to  it.  Especially  is  this  true  in  the  developmental 
period  of  boys  and  girls.  The  impetuous  blood  of 
youth  is  prone  to  defy  restraint  and  to  throw  itself 
into  that  side  of  the  balance  which  gives  license  to 
vice.  Fortunately  the  same  period  of  life  is  one 
susceptible  in  a  marked  degree  to  spiritual  influ- 
ences. The  greatest  responsibility  that  God  has  put 
34 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

upon  us  is  the  arrangement  of  suitable  environment 
for  our  boys  and  girls.  And  we  shall  have  to  an- 
swer for  it  in  our  own  day  and  generation  by  the 
degree  of  respectability  or  dishonor  that  comes  to 
the  progeny  that  are  to  follow  us. 

When  the  old  overland  stage  route  was  established 
through  his  native  town,  Jim  became  one  of  the 
drivers  of  the  big  coaches  that  were  the  real  romance 
of  the  country  roads.  In  those  days  the  stage  driver 
was  the  real  aristocrat  of  the  country.  He  wore 
high-topped  boots,  laundered  shirts,  and  a  wealth  of 
silk  handkerchiefs  and  fine  cravats  which  were  the 
envy  of  all  the  farmer  boys  whose  revenues  were 
far  too  limited  to  indulge  in  such  luxuries. 

And  Jim  was  a  dandy  fellow  as  he  swung  his 
team  of  four  prancing  steeds  and  his  big  coach 
around  the  curves  of  the  road.  And  all  the  girls 
looked  at  him  with  admiration,  and  coveted  the  least 
attention  he  deigned  to  pay  them.  At  the  country 
dance  he  was  quite  the  center  of  attraction  and  all 
feminine  eyes  were  upon  him.  His  very  reckless- 
ness had  a  charm  about  it,  which  captivated,  and 
his  pertinent  phrases  became  a  part  of  the  village 
vernacular. 

Unreasoning  youth !  how  little  did  his  associates 
and  admirers  dream  that  the  very  things  that  were 
35 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

the  means  of  his  captivating  them  were  to  be  the 
means  of  his  undoing! 

It  was  considered  such  a  manly  thing  to  smoke 
cigarettes,  and  on  high  occasions  cigars,  that  Jim 
could  not  have  maintained  his  exalted  position  in  the 
juvenile  mind  for  any  time  without  acquiring  these 
necessary  accomplishments.  A  dandy  stage  driver 
without  a  cigarette  could  not  be  imagined.  The 
self-satisfaction  that  is  manifest  in  the  way  a  young 
man  holds  his  cigarette  or  cigar  is  a  study  in  itself. 
The  upcurling  lip  and  the  pecuHar  bend  of  his 
fingers  as  he  rests  between  acts  is  the  reflex  of  a 
mental  condition  most  gratifying  to  the  participant, 
but  most  ludicrous  and  obnoxious  to  the  one  who 
has  to  endure  seeing  him.  Our  Jim,  like  every  other 
boy  who  takes  up  the  smoking  habit,  discounted  his 
chances  for  success  in  life  by  at  least  ten  per 
cent. 

The  man  who  defined  a  cigarette  as  a  fire  at  one 
end  and  a  fool  at  the  other  was  not  far  short  of  the 
truth.  I  have  seen  three  men  die  of  tobacco  heart, 
and  scores  of  others  become  mentally  and  physically 
disabled.  The  poison  nicotine  aflfects  all  people  who 
expose  themselves  to  its  baneful  influence,  but  it  has 
a  peculiar  affinity  for  the  tissue  cells  of  certain  in- 
dividuals, and  a  selective  action  on  different  organs 
36 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

of  the  susceptible  person.  If  it  is  the  heart  that  is 
selected,  a  mechanical  difficulty  soon  develops  which 
not  infrequently  proves  fatal.  If  it  is  the  brain 
cells  that  first  manifest  the  poison,  mental  and  moral 
degeneracy  is  the  penalty.  In  fact,  I  believe  that 
the  moral  fibre  of  any  man  who  uses  tobacco  is  dam- 
aged, and  that  he  can  never  stand  on  the  same  level 
while  he  is  under  thei  influence  of  it  that  he  did  be- 
fore. The  cigarette  fiend  is  discounted  as  a  laborer, 
discredited  as  a  thinker,  and  rated  down  as  a  moral 
risk.  Not  only  that,  but  the  cigarette  is  the  wedge 
that  opens  the  way  for  other  vices,  often  of  a  more 
serious  import. 

The  sequence  of  events  from  tobacco  to  whiskey 
was  the  way  of  this  young  man,  as  it  is  the  way  of 
countless  thousands  who  begin  by  gentle  gradation 
the  downward  course.  An  occasional  drink  at  first 
seemed  no  impropriety,  considering  the  kind  of  peo- 
ple he  associated  with.  Why  should  not  youth  on 
certain  occasions  make  merry  the  heart  and  lift  the 
burden  of  care  ?  And  Jim  fell  into  the  delusion  that 
has  broken  more  hearts,  paralyzed  more  homes,  and 
marked  more  men  for  destruction  than  any  other 
thing  in  this  world.  For  a  long  time  his  drinking 
bouts  were  only  occasional  affairs,  and  in  his  lucid 
intervals  he  kept  himself  fairly  decent.  After  each 
37 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

wild  orgie  he  suffered  remorse  and  resolved  that 
he  would  never  repeat  the  process,  but  when  the 
tempter  came  he  capitulated  each  time  with  less  and 
less  resistance  until  his  will  power  was  completely 
overcome. 

He  centered  his  attentions  on  one  of  the  good 
girls  of  the  village,  and  she  was  completely  capti- 
vated by  him.  His  reckless  disregard  of  all  con- 
ventional things,  his  apparent  pertinent  rejoinder  to 
friend  and  foe  alike,  his  boast  of  pugilistic  prowess, 
were  all  marks  of  manliness  in  her  eyes,  and  in  his 
very  vices  she  saw  the  mark  of  independence  and 
individuality.  She  thought  she  could  reform  him. 
She  was  warned  by  all  the  good  matrons  of  the  vil- 
lage, and  the  gray-haired  men  shook  their  heads  in 
disapproval  of  her  hopeless  task,  but  she  would  not 
be  advised.  There  was  a  magnetism  in  his  touch, 
there  was  a  charm  in  his  glance,  which  held  her 
spellbound  as  the  bird  is  held  by  the  eye  of  a  ser- 
pent. She  could  not  reason,  she  was  swayed  only 
by  her  emotion. 

When  years  of  suffering  have  taught  their  lesson, 
many  women  wake  up  to  the  folly  of  allowing  senti- 
ment to  mask  their  judgment  in  this  most  important 
of  all  the  ventures  of  their  life.  And  yet  the  world 
wags  on  in  the  same  old  way,  the  moth  flies  to  the 
38 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

fatal  flame,  the  experience  of  others  will  not 
teach  us. 

The  woman  who  thinks  she  can  reform  a  bad  man 
by  marrying  him  will  be  defeated  every  time.  If 
he  does  not  think  enough  of  her  to  straighten  up  and 
walk  the  way  of  rectitude  while  she  keeps  him  hop- 
ing and  guessing,  he  will  never  straighten  up  when 
the  prize  is  already  in  his  possession  beyond  per- 
adventure. 

No,  my  young  lady  friend,  if  you  are  captivated 
by  the  charms  of  a  reckless  man,  don't  ever  under- 
take the  reform  business  by  staking  your  soul  and 
body  on  the  issue,  or  you  will  simply  throw  yourself 
under  the  wheels  of  Juggernaut  and  be  ground  to 
powder.  You  can't  afford  such  an  experiment. 
The  odds  are  too  great  against  you. 

I  am  writing  this  long  after  its  occurrence,  in  the 
life  of  these  young  people.  The  wedding  day  was 
auspicious,  and  Jim  looked  a  prince  as  he  stood  be- 
side his  beautiful  companion,  and  she  was  all  smiles 
and  all  hopes  for  the  future,  and  the  gray-haired 
men  and  the  village  dames  forgot  their  gloomy  fore- 
bodings in  the  poetry  of  the  present  hour.  For  a 
time  the  sunshine  of  love  seemed  to  fall  over  their 
little  domicile.  The  mutual  satisfaction  of  being 
always  together  had  brought  a  new  force  into  their 
39 


AFTER   TWENTY  YEARS 

lives  and  they  dreamed  and  built  air  castles  to- 
gether. 

These  happy  days  did  not  last  long.  One  day  the 
old  tempter  came  back  again,  and  Jim  came  in  with 
a  swagger  and  a  stupid  smile,  and  began  to  curse 
and  swear.  The  terrified  young  wife  was  all  com- 
passion as  she  covered  his  dishonored  brow  with 
kisses.  She  was  sure  that  it  was  only  a  temporary 
lapse,  and  that  the  sunshine  which  was  obscured  by 
a  passing  cloud  would  come  out  as  bright  as  ever. 
She  did  not  think  it  of  sufficient  consequence  to  take 
a  definite  stand  and  issue  an  ultimatum.  She  did 
not  comprehend  that  this  was  the  beginning  of  the 
end  of  all  happiness  in  her  life. 

And  right  here,  it  seems  to  me,  she  showed  the 
weakness  that  has  been  the  undoing  of  many  a  happy 
home.  If  she  had  been  uncompromising  in  her  atti- 
tude, if  she  had  told  him  that  this  day  he  had  to 
choose  between  her  companionship  and  the  demon 
of  drunkenness,  I  believe  he  would  have  capitulated. 
No  woman  should  be  compelled  by  social  custom  or 
stereotyped  law  to  be  the  forced  companion  of  a 
drunkard,  nor  to  have  her  home  pauperized  and  her 
family  dishonored  by  the  selfish  indulgence  of  a  de- 
generate man.  An  uncompromising  stand  at  the 
beginning  would  settle  the  matter  for  all  time,  and 
40 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

I  believe  any  woman  would  be  justified  in  taking 
such  a  position. 

A  drunkard  is  a  worse  offender  against  society, 
in  my  judgment,  than  a  thief.  His  delinquency  is 
more  imminent  and  far-reaching  in  its  consequences 
than  the  crime  of  the  man  we  send  to  jail  for  petty 
larceny.  The  thief  does  not  apprehend  the  goods  of 
poor  people,  because  they  have  no  chattels  of  com- 
mercial value  to  him.  He  takes  from  those  who 
while  they  may  feel  the  disappointment  of  being  de- 
frauded are  yet  possessed  of  all  the  necessities  of 
life.  But  the  man  who  wilfully  takes  the  money 
which  is  the  product  of  his  toil,  and  which  by  the 
laws  of  God  and  nature  belongs  to  a  helpless  wife 
and  dependent  children,  and  appropriates  it  to  his 
own  selfish,  unrighteous  purpose,  is  one  who  robs 
the  needy  and  defrauds  the  defenseless.  And  if  we 
send  a  thief  to  the  penitentiary  for  a  period  of 
months  or  years  to  expiate  his  crime  of  misappro- 
priation of  the  chattels  of  other  people,  we  should 
have  some  form  of  punishment  for  the  drunkard  that 
would  be  proportionate  to  his  offense.  I  believe 
there  was  wholesome  discipline  ^n  the  old-time 
whipping  post,  barbarous  as  it  seemed,  and  for  the 
sake  of  this  kind  of  an  offender  it  is  a  pity  that  such 
a  speedy  form  of  retribution  could  not  be  restored. 
41 


AFTER   TWENTY  YEARS 

When  society  collectively  makes  itself  the  arbiter 
of  the  rights  of  its  units,  and  invokes  its  traditional 
laws  to  adjust  differences  that  arise  between  them, 
it  exercises  a  necessary  and  imperative  function,  but 
when  society  stands  by  and  connives  at  this  form  of 
robbery,  and  shuts  its  eyes  to  the  spectacle  of  pau- 
perized women  and  suffering  children,  it  is  weak, 
nay,  almost  vicious  in  its  indifference. 

When  the  chance  of  education,  of  Christian  train- 
ing, of  social  recognition,  of  proper  clothing,  of 
quality  and  quantity  of  food  to  eat  are  all  sacrificed 
to  the  unreasonable  appetite  of  a  human  monster 
who  has  become  lost  to  all  the  better  instincts  of 
life ;  when  the  family  altar,  which  has  been  conse- 
crated to  love  and  devotion  to  a  common  cause, 
becomes  a  pandemonium  of  riot  and  vice  and  de- 
generacy through  the  selfishness  of  one  individual, 
then  society  should  step  in  and  show  its  strong  hand 
and  adopt  some  remedy  for  this  outrageous  perver- 
sion. When  we  recall  the  fact  that  the  vice  of  the 
drunkard  does  not  end  with  his  own  life,  but  that 
he  hands  down  to  posterity  the  real  physical  defects 
that  he  has  brought  upon  himself;  that  he  often 
transmits  epilepsy^  dipsomania,  insanity  and  a  pre- 
disposition to  crime,  the  duty  of  society  becomes 
more  imperative  than  ever. 
42 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

In  this  particular  home  we  are  reviewing,  the 
blight  of  the  drunkard  fell  like  a  dark  pall  over  it, 
and  extinguished  love  and  all  the  better  instincts  of 
life.  Children  were  born  to  the  inheritance  of  pau- 
perism and  went  forth  with  the  stamp  of  crime  fas- 
tened upon  them.  It  was  much  to  their  credit  that 
they  did  not  all  go  the  highway  of  ruin.  The  wife 
became  broken  in  spirit  and  looked  like  a  faded 
flower.  The  family  wardrobe  was  reduced  to  a  col- 
lection of  rags  and  tatters,  the  mere  remnants  of  bet- 
ter days,  and  often  the  larder  was  completely  de- 
pleted. Hunger  was  a  sensation  to  which  they  be- 
came habituated,  and  the  pinching  cold  of  winter 
made  inroads  upon  the  unfortunate  victims  of  this 
most  unhappy  home.  Jim  had  no  regular  employ- 
ment, because  people  could  not  depend  on  him. 
Laziness  always  finds  an  excuse  for  itself  in  the 
claim  that  other  people  have  prevented  its  victim 
from  having  any  opportunity.  And  this  was  the 
refuge  of  our  poor  degenerate  Jim  as  he  walked  the 
streets  in  the  garb  of  a  vagabond,  and  sank  lower 
in  the  social  scale  with  the  declining  sun  of  each  day. 

He  had  a  habit  of  buying  things  always  on  credit, 
and  never  seemed  to  have  any  intention  of  paying 
for  them.  He  made  promises  daily  which  he  never 
intended  to  fulfill. 

43 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

In  high  places  as  well  as  in  low  places  there  are 
people  who  never  grasp  the  significance  of  credit  as 
a  factor  in  their  success,  and  of  lack  of  it  as  a  factor 
in  their  failures.  The  confidence  that  people  have 
in  your  honesty  is  the  equivalent  in  financial  potency 
of  a  balance  to  your  credit  in  the  bank.  When 
emergencies  come  in  your  finances  you  can  draw 
upon  it,  just  as  you  can  draw,  on  a  bank  account. 
But  when  your  credit  is  gone  the  world  looks  with 
little  mercy  on  your  importunity.  No  matter  how 
urgent  the  need,  people  will  not  lend  to  a  man  who 
has  proved  himself  a  bad  paymaster, 

Jim  had  "run  his  face"  wherever  he  could  get 
people  to  trust  him.  Creditors  were  always  press- 
ing him  and  making  demands  which  he  was  utterly 
unable  to  satisfy.  Every  cent  he  produced  by  fair 
means  or  foul  went  into  the  coffers  of  the  saloon- 
keeper, and  even  the  wages  of  his  unfortunate 
wife,  when  she  made  heroic  efforts  to  emancipate 
herself,  were  appropriated  whenever  he  had  oppor- 
tunity to  get  possession  of  them.  Thus  years  of 
suffering  and  dishonor  wore  themselves  away  in  this 
degrading  process.  And  still  society  demanded  that 
the  galling  bonds  which  held  innocent  people  to 
.  such  an  obligation  were  indissoluble.  That  the  out- 
raged wife  and  children  must  honor  and  obey  a  man 
44 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

who  had  descended  below  the  level  of  the  brutes, 
that  they  must  submit  to  continue  in  the  process  of 
destruction  though  every  day  they  were  brought 
lower  and  lower  in  dishonor,  was  altogether  wrong. 

I  think  our  fundamental  error  in  such  cases  lies 
in  our  failure  to  give  drunkenness  its  proper  magni- 
tude in  the  category  of  crimes  and  to  recognize  from 
the  far-reaching  effects  of  it,  that  it  is  a  felony  more 
destructive  to  society  than  arson  or  theft;  that  the 
degeneration  of  it  does  not  end  with  the  perpetrator, 
but  is  handed  down  to  generations  yet  unborn.  The 
daily  offerings  at  this  family  altar  were  tears  and 
pitiful  appeals,  but  they  were  all  to  no  purpose.  God 
has  surely  forsaken  that  home  where  a  drunken 
demon  is  enthroned  as  guardian  and  protector. 

There  was  one  consolation  that  came  out  of  the 
direst  distress  of  this  blighted  family  circle.  Jim, 
the  unworthy  author  of  all  their  afflictions,  was 
charitable  enough  to  run  away  and  leave  them.  He 
drifted  about  with  the  irregular  criminal  element  and 
plunged  into  all  the  excesses  known  to  that  order 
of  society.  To  implore  the  aid  of  the  people  in  the 
streets  and  make  his  rounds  as  a  common  beggar 
seemed  now  no  impropriety  to  him,  who  had  once 
held  his  head  erect  in  the  satisfaction  of  fine  man- 
hood. And  to  spend  the  money  bestowed  by  char- 
45 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

itable  hands  to  assuage  hunger  at  the  nearest  grog 
shop  seemed  no  compromise  of  dignity. 

When  the  drunkard  reaches  a  certain  level  in  his 
downward  career  he  ceases  to  be  governed  by  any 
moral  code  and  recognizes  no  rule  of  society  for  his 
guidance.  Animals  even  of  the  lowest  type  are  true 
to  their  instincts,  which  are  the  unwritten  laws  of 
their  life.  But  the  drunkard  has  not  a  single  in- 
stinct that  is  not  vitiated  and  perverted.  He  sinks 
in  this  way  to  a  level  far  beneath  the  brute  creation, 
and  wallows  in  the  ooze  and  slime  of  the  lowest 
dregs  of  animal  life. 

To  me  this  is  one  of  the  saddest  stories  in  the 
volume  of  human  existence.  To  see  the  human 
form,  which  was  created  in  the  image  of  God, 
shriveled  with  a  self-inflicted  blight;  to  see  faith 
and  charity  and  all  the  better  feelings  of  life  all 
submerged  in  the  terrible  maelstrom  of  drunken- 
ness ;  to  see  reason  dethroned  and  a  demoniacal 
possession  substituted  for  the  personality  that  once 
was  possessed  of  God-like  powers  in  embryo  with 
untold  possibilities  for  the  future.  The  recording 
angel  must  blush  as  he  flies  up  to  heaven's  chancery 
with  the  word. 

To  commit  suicide  in  the  face  of  such  a  condition 
would  seem  like  the  only  rational  thing  to  do. 
46 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

Indeed,  the  only  commendable  thing  we  have  to  say 
about  the  last  years  of  him  whose  biography  we 
are  reviewing  is  that  he  mustered  up  courage  enough 
to  put  a  bullet  through  his  brain  and  stop  the 
terrible  escapement  which  was  vibrating  to  such  an 
unholy  purpose. 

What  a  queer  thing  is  the  crime  of  suicide !  To 
the  mind  possessed  of  all  its  normal  attributes  it  is 
hard  to  comprehend  the  view  point  of  the  one  who 
sees  such  desperation  in  his  present  circumstances 
that  he  chooses  this  tragic  and  most  unnatural  way 
of  exit  from  this  world.  Suicide  is  ordinarily  the 
work  of  a  coward,  but  it  may  be  the  last  culminating 
act  of  a  hero.  When  it  is  chosen  as  the  way  of 
escape  from  the  natural  and  inevitable  consequence 
of  perversions  in  our  life;  when  it  becomes  the 
subterfuge  by  means  of  which  to  avoid  the  necessity 
of  living  down  or  rectifying  the  mistakes  we  have 
made,  it  is  a  cowardly  act,  bespeaking  a  soul  of 
depravity.  And  the  ignomy  of  it  increases  with  the 
magnitude  of  the  obligation  escaped.  The  man  who 
has  a  wife  and  family  depending  daily  on  the  product 
of  his  toil  is  little  short  of  a  monster  when  he  shirks 
his  moral  obligation  in  this  tragic  way,  and  throws 
them,  with  one  desperate  stroke  at  his  jugulars,  on 
the  mercy  of  the  world  for  all  the  years  to  come. 

47 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

We  can  imagine,  and  indeed  history  records, 
instances  in  which  souls  of  the  highest  nobility  have 
chosen  rather  to  destroy  themselves  than  to  capitu- 
late to  dishonor,  or  to  be  degraded  by  others.  The  old 
Japanese  tradition  of  the  propriety  of  self-destruc- 
tion when  the  loss  of  all  honor  is  weighed  in  the 
balance  against  it,  though  apparently  one  of  the 
survivals  of  barbarous  ages,  has  yet  something  in  it 
to  challenge  our  admiration  if  not  our  approval. 
Suicide  links  itself  so  closely  with  insanity,  that  we 
may  rightly  assign  to  it  a  place  in  the  great  majority 
of  cases  with  the  mental  aberrations. 

And  indeed  it  seems  not  improbable  to  me  that  it 
might  be  a  manifestation  of  one  of  the  great  con- 
servative laws  of  nature,  to  eliminate  from  society 
in  a  feasible  way  some  of  its  unprofitable  units. 
When  a  vessel  at  sea  has  become  of  no  further  use 
as  a  conveyer  of  passengers  or  of  merchandise,  to  al- 
low it  to  drift  as  a  hulk  aimlessly  on  the  waves  would 
not  only  be  a  useless  thing  but  it  would  be  a  danger- 
ous thing,  threatening  always  the  integrity  of  other 
vessels.  And  so  we  dismantle  and  reduce  it  to  safety 
by  destroying  it  as  a  distinct  entity.  It  might  be 
that  Nature  in  her  great  far-reaching  processes  is 
exercising  some  such  Providential  foresight,  and 
implanting  the  desire  for  self  destruction  in  the  mind 
48 


THE   EASIEST   WAY 

which  has  not  only  become  useless,  but  has  become 
vicious. 

Let  me  not  be  misunderstood.  I  am  not  writing 
the  vindication  of  the  ignoble  soul  who  dodges  his 
moral  responsibilities  by  this  kind  of  subterfuge,  nor 
am  I  condoning  such  an  unnatural  action.  I  am 
simply  suggesting  that  the  apparent  paradoxes  in 
nature  may  have  their  purpose,  and  no  doubt  do  fit 
into  a  great  beneficent  plan  which  our  limited  per- 
spective fails  to  grasp  in  its  full  significance. 

Let  us  take  one  last  farewell  look,  before  the 
curtain  falls,  at  the  mortal  remains  of  him  who  was 
so  bright  and  promising  and  prepossessing  in  his 
youth.  In  a  city  far  away,  in  the  potter's  field,  he  is 
buried,  without  rite  or  ceremony.  No  tear  of  pity 
was  shed  as  he  went  ignobly  down  to  his  last  long 
rest,  and  was  known  to  the  world  no  more.  Let 
us  hope  that  in  the  plan  of  redemption  there  may  be 
propitiation  for  even  such  as  he,  and  that  the  dark 
blot  of  crime  may  be  lifted  from  his  brow,  and  that 
he  may  have  another  chance  to  be  free  from  the 
terrible  thralldom  which  crept  so  insidiously  and 
imperceptibly  into  his  life  and  blighted  all  its 
chances. 


49 


CHAPTER  V 

RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

I  SUMMON  now  another  witness.  I  call  for  one 
more  of  the  old  familiar  group  who  conjured 
with  the  daisy's  petals,  and  a  fine  physical  type  of  a 
boy  comes  forth  from  the  halls  of  memory  with  all 
the  promptness  of  a  magician's  bidding,  and  seats 
himself  upon  the  witness  stand  ready  to  be  inter- 
rogated. 

There  is  not  much  in  a  name.  The  most  common- 
place appellation  becomes  glorious  when  it  is  the 
indicator  of  a  great  soul,  and  the  most  euphonious 
combination  of  syllables  becomes  discordant  to  our 
ears  when  it  is  the  indicator  of  an  inferior  being. 

We  will  choose  at  random  the  name  Joseph  for 
this  friend  of  bygone  days  and  hide  his  personality 
under  this  biblical  appellation. 

Joseph  was  the  son  of  a  wealthy  man  and  had  a 
brother  who  had  attained  to  great  distinction  in 
legislative  and  diplomatic  circles. 

And  Joseph  was  very  proud  of  the  family  name, 
and  thought  that  the  social  and  financial  standing 
of  his  people  were  personal  assets  that  everybody 

50 


RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

should  acknowledge  and  give  proper  consideration 
to  in  their  estimate  of  him.  He  estimated  rightly 
this  misjudgment  of  the  human  mind,  which  cannot 
get  away  from  the  fallacy  of  coats  of  arms,  or  of 
distinguished  pedigrees  in  its  rating  of  the  individual 
man. 

Heredity,  we  admit,  has  its  bearing  on  mental  and 
moral  traits.  The  birthright  of  each  man  is  the 
accumulated  soul  momentum  of  the  progenitors  be- 
fore him  back  to  the  first  pair.  But  when  a  man 
flaunts  his  pedigree  and  the  worldly  possessions  of 
his  relatives  as  a  claim  for  recognition  it  is  generally 
an  indication  that  he  has  forfeited  his  birthright  and 
acknowledged  himself  a  satellite  ready  and  willing 
to  revolve  around  somebody  else,  and  not  a  luminary 
to  give  out  light  himself. 

To  come  of  a  noble  pedigree  is  no  palliation  of 
your  condition,  if  you  yourself  are  a  vagabond.  To 
hang  rags  and  tatters  on  the  family  tree,  does  not 
adorn  it,  nor  do  the  rags  and  tatters  profit  any  by  the 
conspicuous  contact. 

As  a  student,  Joseph  was  a  drifter  without  rudder 
or  helm  to  guide  him.  He  followed  the  lines  of 
least  resistance,  and  when  he  met  with  obstacles  in 
the  way,  instead  of  bending  his  energies  for  their 
removal,  he  simply  angulated  around  them  and  went 
51 


AFTER  TWENTY  YEARS 

on  as  if  nothing  had  happened.  The  farmer  who 
plows  around  the  old  stumps  and  leaves  them  to 
hamper  the  work  of  future  years  will  never  have 
much  of  a  farm.  And  the  man  in  any  profession 
who  does  not  clear  the  way  before  him  and  go  down 
to  the  very  foundation  of  things,  and  take  full  pos- 
session of  the  fundamentals  will  have  the  same 
limitations  as  the  man  who  leaves  stumps  in  his 
field. 

Particularly  is  this  true  in  the  work  of  the  student. 
The  underlying  principles  of  all  our  arts  and  sciences 
are  simple  and  easy  to  comprehend.  In  the  science  of 
mathematics  we  deal  first  with  the  four  elementary 
principles,  addition,  subtraction,  multiplication,  and 
division ;  and  with  these  as  a  stock  in  trade  we  pro- 
ceed to  all  those  processes  of  reasoning  which  end 
in  calculus  and  conic  sections.  And  yet  the  whole 
science  of  mathematics — a  science  so  beautiful  in  its 
elucidation,  and  so  grand  and  comprehensive  in  its 
scope  that  it  reaches  over  the  abyss  of  untold  mil- 
lions of  miles  and  deals  with  the  fixed  stars  of  the 
firmament — is  comprehended  in  the  different  appli- 
cation of  those  four  fundamental  principles,  addition, 
subtraction,  multiplication,  and  division. 

Education  is  evolution.  Its  accretions  accumulate 
on  the  inductive  plan.  We  master  the  fundamental 
52 


RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

facts,  and  then  proceed  to  discover  those  compre- 
hensive laws  which  correlate  these  facts  into  an 
interdependent  system.  I  say  advisably  that  we 
discover  those  laws,  for  the  true  student  rises  to 
his  own  generalizations,  and  enjoys  the  thrill  and 
feels  all  the  emotion  of  a  new  discovery  every  time 
he  puts  facts  together  and  establishes  in  his  mind 
the  law  that  correlates  them.  Education  is  beautiful 
to  the  one  who  gets  that  lucid  insight  into  the  fun- 
damentals, which  makes  their  combination  into 
generalizations  easy  and  direct.  But  to  the  grovel- 
ing mind  which  always  sees  through  a  glass  dimly,  it 
is  a  drudgery,  irksome  and  without  pleasure. 

When  we  go  from  the  theoretical  world  into  the 
practical,  when  we  meet  the  really  serious  problems 
of  life,  our  mastery  of  fundamentals  tells  with 
greater  precision  than  ever. 

We  see  the  surgeon  apply  his  knife,  and  we  marvel 
at  me  accuracy  with  which  he  cuts  all  around  the 
vital  organs,  when  a  human  life  would  be  the  for- 
feiture for  the  least  error  in  the  direction  of  his 
incision. 

If  we  follow  the  career  of  that  surgeon  from  its 
inception  as  a  medical  student  we  will  find  him 
pacing  his  floor  in  the  midnight  hours,  rehearsing 
to  himself  the  facts  of  anatomy  until  he  is  driven 

53 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

almost  to  madness  by  the  dead  memory  task.  That 
was  the  price  he  had  to  pay  to  become  a  surgeon. 
Instinctively  he  knew  what  it  would  cost  and  was 
willing  to  make  the  sacrifice.  It  is  the  mastery  of 
fundamentals  that  makes  the  surgeon's  work  easy. 
Without  that  he  would  bungle  and  hesitate. 

We  read  with  pleasure  the  beautiful  mellifluous 
cadences  of  a  Gray's  Elegy  and  wonder  at  the  na- 
tural gift  of  the  man  who  could  produce  such  a 
poem.  On  the  night  before  his  great  battle  on  the 
heights  of  Abraham,  General  Wolf,  as  he  drifted 
down  the  Saint  Lawrence  River  with  his  brave  men 
who  were  the  next  day  to  see  him  immortalized  in 
the  hour  of  his  death,  rehearsed  a  stanza  from  this 
beautiful  poem,  and  then  said,  "I  would  rather  be 
the  author  of  that  than  to  whip  the  French  to- 
morrow." But  if  we  go  into  the  history  of  this 
masterpiece  of  our  English  poesy,  we  shall  find  the 
man  Gray  for  fourteen  years  studying  the  manners 
and  customs  of  rural  folk,  and  adjusting  and  re- 
adjusting his  stanzas  over  all  that  period  of  time. 

When  we  receive  with  satisfaction  the  final  pro- 
duct, we  do  not  stop  to  think  of  all  the  elements  that 
have  gone  into  it.  But  the  painstaking  worker  is 
always  rewarded  for  his  diligence.  Labor  has  its 
sure  mead.  We  love  to  do  the  things  w«  know  how 

54 


RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

to  do.    Work  is  not  drudgery  when  it  involves  the 

application  of  principles  that  have  grown  into  our 
life,    by    long    continued    thought    and    attention 
Irksomeness  is  born  of  ignorance,  and  the  man  who 
works  muscles  without  brains  will  always  he  a  slave. 

Our  friend  Joseph  was  wont  to  borrow  the 
answers  of  problems  from  his  neighbor  to  the  right 
or  to  the  left,  contenting  himself  with  the  thought 
that  the  teacher  had  been  deceived,  and  that  he 
would  get  full  credit  for  his  ready  preparation.  It 
did  not  dawn  on  him  that  his  whole  life  was  to  be 
a  reflex  of  that  deception,  and  that  he  would  be 
called  upon  to  render  account  for  the  uttermost 
farthing  of  that  fraudulent  advantage  which  he 
thought  he  had  gained. 

The  most  foolish  person  in  this  world  is  the  one 
who  deceives  himself.  There  was  a  boy  from  a 
country  village  who  is  to  figure  in  the  later  pages 
of  this  little  book,  who  used  to  furnish  Joseph  with 
a  great  bulk  of  his  school  work  ready  for  recita- 
tion. He  was  an  unpretending  plodder  without 
adornment  of  person  or  manner,  but  with  a 
soul  that  hungered  for  the  truth.  Joseph  was 
boon  companion  to  this  boy  in  their  room  when 
he  needed  assistance,  but  when  he  met  him  in 
the  public  highways  or  the  social  gatherings  he  did 

55 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

what  the  priest  did  in  the  parable  of  the  good 
Samaritan — passed  by  on  the  other  side. 

When  years  had  rolled  away,  and  this  plodding 
boy  had  risen  to  distinction,  and  Joseph  had 
acknowledged  defeat  in  his  life's  struggle,  and  had 
narrowed  his  sphere  of  action  down  almost  to  the 
vanishing  point  and  his  circle  of  associates  to  a  mean 
faction  of  the  baser  sort  in  a  village,  they  met  again 
in  a  great  crowd,  and  Joseph  was  not  only  anxious 
to  do  him  homage  publicly  but  paid  him  such  a 
compliment  as  he  had  rarely  received  even  from 
his  most  devoted  friends. 

When  we  look  back  on  our  school  days,  par- 
ticularly we  of  the  country  extraction,  we  have 
vivid  memories  of  those  who  were  kind  to  us  when 
we  were  unknown  quantities,  and  had  no  claim  on 
anything  but  the  magnanimity  of  the  more  fortunate 
ones  who  had  already  attained  to  social  prestige. 

To  be  courteous  to  a  green  country  boy,  and  treat 
him  with  due  consideration  requires  a  certain  nobil- 
ity of  soul,  which  the  great  multitude  do  not  possess. 
I  have  been  through  the  process,  and  know  the 
feeling  that  comes  into  the  life  of  the  new  recruit 
when  he  meets  with  one  of  those  rare  individuals 
who  take  him  into  their  confidence,  and  treat  him 
as  a  comrade.     In  my  memory  there  shaJI  ever  be 


RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

fresh  a  few  persons,  who  did  not  disdain  me  in  those 
days  of  misgiving  and  overweening  fear,  when  I 
first  came  from  the  country  village  with  the  odor  of 
the  farm  on  my  clothing,  and  found  myself  at  a 
disadvantage  in  the  presence  of  the  boys  and  girls 
Vv'ho  had  been  reared  in  the  cities.  How  many  of 
those  butterflies  have  I  seen  to  fold  up  their  gaudy 
wings  and  settle  down  as  dull  grubs  of  the  earth  to 
creep  and  crawl  the  rest  of  their  mortal  career. 
Some  of  those  stories  are  really  pitiful.  But  they 
never  dreamed  of  such  contingencies  in  the  hour  of 
their  glory.  They  soared  aloft  unmindful  of  the 
imprisoned  chrysali  that  were  one  day  to  break  open 
their  cocoons  and  join  the  ranks.  Their  disdain  was 
unmerciful. 

But  there  were  a  few,  thanks  to  the  better  side  of 
humanity,  who  did  not  disavow  the  country  boys 
and  girls.  My  memory  shall  ever  cherish  their 
names.  Some  of  them  have  fallen  asleep  long  ago, 
and  are  known  only  by  the  remembrance  of  their 
noble  beaming.  And  some  of  them  have  grown 
into  the  full  estate  of  manhood  and  womanhood, 
and  the  nobility  which  characterized  their  lives  as 
boys  and  girls  has  told  out  through  all  the  years,  and 
they  have  become  grand  men  and  women.  I  never 
meet  such  a  one  that  I  do  not  have  a  feeling  of 
57 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

veneration  come  over  me ;  a  feeling  of  adoration  that 
amounts  almost  to  worship. 

Our  Joseph  knew  not  much  of  the  strenuous  side 
of  life.  He  loved  to  indulge  himself  in  long  morn- 
ing slumbers,  and  to  rouse  himself  in  time  only  to 
swallow  a  hasty  breakfast  and  rush  off  to  try  and 
answer  to  the  morning  roll  call,  which  he  often 
missed  by  a  considerable  margin.  He  never  seemed 
to  realize  how  much  worry  he  could  have  eliminated 
from  his  life  by  being  five  minutes  ahead  of  time 
always  instead  of  that  much  behind  time. 

When  we  have  to  catch  a  train  or  meet  some 
important  appointment,  it  is  sq  easy  to  make  our 
plan  so  that  it  brings  us  with  a  margin  of  a  few 
minutes  to  the  good,  and  we  can  maintain  the  dignity 
and  the  equanimity  of  our  minds  so  perfectly  with 
that  kind  of  arrangement,  that  it  is  a  wonder  any 
sane  person  should  inflict  upon  himself  the  dis- 
comfiture of  procrastination.  The  mental  force  we 
dissipate  by  the  worry  of  being  late  is  a  constant 
drain  upon  our  vital  reserve,  which  tells  with  great 
effect  in  the  sum  total  of  our  achievements. 

When  we  begin  the  activities  of  the  day  it  is  an 
easy  matter  to  lay  out  our  plan  in  order,  to  string 
our  daily  events  on  the  mental  rosary,  so  that  every- 
thing will  fall  into  its  proper  sequence,  and  no  one 

58 


RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

thing  will  intrench  upon  the  domain  of  another.  To 
subordinate  all  other  things  to  the  one  thing  we  have 
in  hand,  and  focus  the  whole  energy  of  our  mind 
upon  it,  is  the  way  to  make  a  success  of  it.  But  the 
dabbler  who  tries  to  focus  on  half  a  dozen  different 
things  at  once  is  the  one  who  will  diffuse  his  mental 
energy  and  bring  nothing  to  speedy  execution. 

Our  Joseph  had  been  fondled  and  pampered  by  an 
over  indulgent  mother  so  much  that  he  made  a 
careful  study  of  his  own  comfort,  and  never  was 
known  to  do  anything  that  had  the  least  element 
of  self-sacrifice  or  self-abnegation  in  it.  And  right 
here  is  where  he  ran  counter  to  one  of  the  very 
fundamental  elements  of  success. 

The  young  man  who  cannot  suffer  cold  and 
hunger  and  fatigue  at  times  without  complaining; 
who  cannot  put  in  extra  shifts  when  he  has  a  rush 
order,  and  supplement  the  day  by  splicing  on  a  part 
of  the  night  if  occasion  requires,  might  as  well  write 
his  name  on  the  plebeian  list,  and  content  himself 
to  be  rated  as  a  failure. 

The  over-anxious  mother,  who  is  so  mindful 
of  every  comfort  of  her  son  that  she  cannot  bear  to 
think  of  his  ever  being  hungry  or  cold  or  tired,  is 
one  of  the  greatest  impediments  to  the  growth  of 
that  son  one  could  imagine.    It  is  out  of  these  very 

59 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

strenuous  things  that  he  is  to  develop  character 
if  he  is  ever  going  to  have  any ;  and  in  its  ultimate 
effects  her  over-kindness  is  the  worst  sort  of 
cruelty. 

The  mother  whose  overweening  compassion  for- 
bids the  pain  that  is  incident  to  the  correction  of 
crooked  feet  when  her  child  is  born  with  that 
deformity,  is  the  most  cruel  person  we  can  imagine, 
when  we  think  of  the  far  reaching  effects  of  her 
supposed  kindness.  The  temporary  physical  suffer- 
ing which  could  have  been  washed  away  by  a  few 
childish  tears  is  transformed  into  a  mental  anguish 
which  knows  no  mitigation  for  the  rest  of  the 
natural  life.  The  parent  who  permits  his  son  to 
taste  sometimes  the  strenuous  side  of  life,  to  know 
some  privations,  to  be  familiar  with  fatigue  and 
hunger  and  any  other  discomfort  incident  to  the 
struggle  for  success  is  the  one  who  is  the  boy's  real 
benefactor  in  the  end. 

And  so  the  young  man  who  has  been  pampered 
in  his  home  and  spoiled  and  taught  the  way  of 
comfort  and  ease  will  in  the  great  majority  of  cases 
suffer  the  anguish  of  defeat  in  years  to  come  when 
there  is  no  help  for  his  condition. 

When  we  go  out  from  under  the  parental  roof, 
and  have  to  stand  on  our  own  responsibility  against 

60 


RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

the  stern  realities  of  life,  we  will  find  that  the  world 
is  not  made  of  sugar  and  water.  We  will  have  to 
encounter  privations  and  discomforts  and  dis- 
appointments, and  if  our  training  has  been  such  that 
we  are  entirely  unprepared  for  these  things  we  are 
most  pitiable  creatures. 

Our  Joseph  was  wont  sometimes  to  be  unmindful 
of  others  in  his  effort  at  self-gratification,  and  to 
neglect  those  little  amenities  of  life  which  are  so 
essential  to  the  profession  of  being  a  gentleman. 
Particularly  was  this  true  when  he  dealt  with  those 
he  regarded  as  inferior  to  himself.  To  him  it  seemed 
quite  a  matter  of  indifference  that  he  should  display 
the  selfish,  ungentlemanly  side  of  his  nature  when 
dealing  with  them,  even  though  it  was  good  policy 
to  feign  the  attributes  of  a  perfect  gentleman  when 
he  dealt  with  the  class  of  boys  and  girls  he  re- 
garded as  his  equals  or  superiors. 

And  this  is  the  real  crucial  test  of  a  gentleman. 
It  requires  no  effort  on  the  part  of  anybody  to  be 
polite  to  those  he  is  anxious  to  please.  But  to 
extend  the  same  courtesies  to  the  forlorn  boy  or 
girl  of  the  lower  intellectual  levels,  or  to  the  vaga- 
bond who  has  chosen  the  way  of  ignorance  and 
rags  or  who  had  it  thrust  upon  him,  requires  a 
magnanimity  of  soul  which  stamps  its  possessor 
01 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

with  that  inborn  refinement  that  is  the  only  indicator 
of  true  gentility. 

In  European  travel  you  sometimes  meet  with 
persons  of  the  so-called  upper  classes,  who  will 
respond  to  your  courteous  request  for  information 
about  your  street  number,  or  the  road  you  should 
choose,  by  elevating  their  chin,  and  walking  by 
with  a  look  of  disdain  in  their  countenance  and  an 
air  of  utter  indifference  to  your  pressing  need  for 
the  information  which  they  could  easily  impart. 
Instead  of  being  classed  as  a  duke  or  a  lord  such 
an  individual  should  be  regarded  as  a  savage.  The 
wild  man  of  the  forest  has  more  of  the  real  elements 
of  thq  gentleman  in  his  make  up,  than  these  partic- 
ular barbarians  of  the  type  I  am  speaking  about, 
who  imagine  themselves  set  apart  by  nature  on  a 
plane  above  the  level  of  common  folk,  with  the 
prerogative  of  reply  or  contemptuous  disdain  as  a 
natural  birthright.  I  concede  to  them  no  such 
distinction. 

A  courteous  bearing  is  one  of  the  greatest  factors 
of  success  in  life.  And  those  very  people  who  do  not 
appear  to  have  any  legitimate  claim  upon  our  atten- 
tion will  often  prove  to  be  the  means  of  our  access 
to  others  whose  patronage  we  rightly  covet.  In  the 
game  of  life  hearts  are  always  trumps.    Words  of 

62 


RAGS    ON    THE    FAMILY    TREE 

kindness  are  like  bread  cast  upon  the  waters.  After 
many  days  they  will  come  back.  It  is  wise  to  speak 
cordially  and  make  social  overtures  to  every  re- 
spectable person  we  meet.  The  great  man  and  the 
small  man  alike  are  pleased  to  have  attention  paid  to 
them.  Once  in  a  while  we  may  meet  churls  who 
show  their  teeth  and  resent  friendly  advances,  but 
we  can  deal  with  them  just  as  we  do  with  a  donkey 
that  kicks  at  us — keep  our  composure  and  pass  by 
and  commiserate  his  lot  for  being  a  donkey. 

Europe  with  its  artificial  social  classification  has 
adopted  the  stupid  method  of  social  seclusiveness, 
and  people  often  spend  hours  together  in  the  close 
contact  which  travel  imposes  without  speaking  to 
each  other.  Each  one  is  afraid  to  speak  to  his 
neighbor  to  the  right  or  to  the  left  for  fear  he  might 
be  snubbed  by  a  duke  or  a  lord.  Eastern  America 
has  in  a  great  measure  aped  the  same  stupidity  and 
fallen  into  the  same  method.  It  has  remained  for 
the  great  developing  west  to  point  out  the  fraternal 
bond,  which  is  at  once  the  birthright  and  the  pleas- 
ant duty  of  all  respectable  people,  and  with  disregard 
of  all  conventionalities  to  develop  the  true  spirit  of 
comradeship  among  men. 

Our  Joseph  appeared  to  be  lucky  in  at  least  one 
thing.     He  gained  the  aflfections  of  a  lovable  girl. 

63 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

After  the  school  days  were  ended,  and  we  all  went 
our  several  ways  to  begin  the  serious  work  of  life, 
he  journeyed  far  over  the  mountains  and  brought  our 
much  admired  Lenora  to  be  his  life's  companion. 

As  a  social  factor  the  high  school  and  college  have 
served  a  very  useful  purpose  in  this  one  thing,  that 
it  brings  together  from  sections  remote  and  near 
young  men  and  young  women  of  all  classes,  and  as- 
sociates them  in  that  intellectual  and  social  contact 
which  enables  them  to  choose  their  affinities.  The 
high  school  has  been  the  great  social  kneading 
board  where  all  the  social  atoms  have  been  mixed 
together  and  each  brushing  up  against  the  others,  ti- 
trated and  retitrated  until  it  found  its  affinity,  if  there 
were  any  affinity  for  it  to  find.  The  baking  process 
was  a  later  development,  and  some  of  those  combina- 
tions have  turned  out  to  be  dough,  and  some  have 
turned  sour,  and  some  have  worked  up  into  the  most 
perfect  product.  The  intellect-leaven  permeates  the 
whole  lump,  and  starts  the  processes  of  development 
going,  and  some  of  the  molecules  continue  to  respond 
to  it,  and  to  vibrate  with  a  greater  and  greater  ampli- 
tude as  the  years  roll  by,  and  some  grow  indifferent 
and  vibrate  less  and  less  until  they  become  dead  and 
cold. 

The  matter  of  affinities  is  one  that  interests  every- 
64 


DRIFTING  WITHOUT  A  RUDDER 

body,  and  at  one  period  of  every  life  assumes 
transcendent  importance.  Most  of  the  meetings 
and  partings  in  this  Hfe  are  a  matter  of  chance,  some 
of  them  I  believe  a  matter  of  destiny,  and  but  few 
of  them  a  matter  of  deliberate  arrangement.  We 
discover  our  affinities  something  after  this  manner: 

If  in  a  room  where  a  piano  is  standing  we  produce 
a  sound  from  some  other  sonorous  instrument,  and 
listen,  as  the  vibrations  die  away,  there  will  be  one 
key  of  that  piano  that  is  giving  back  the  same  tone, 
while  all  the  other  keys  of  the  instrument  are  silent. 
The  one  wire  which  by  its  texture  and  tension  can 
take  up  the  sympathetic  vibrations  is  the  only  one 
that  gets  the  sonorous  message  from  its  kindred  viol 
or  harp.  The  two  are  perfectly  attuned  to  each 
other  and  exist  in  a  condition  of  sympathetic  rap- 
port. 

And  this  is  a  symbol  of  our  life's  experiences.  In 
the  gamut  of  life  we  meet  with  those  who  give  back 
our  thoughts  and  reflect  our  emotions,  because  they 
are  attuned  by  nature  to  vibrate  at  the  same  ampli- 
tude that  we  are.  These  are  our  affinities.  These 
are  they  we  take  into  the  sanctum  sanctorum  of 
our  souls,  and  reveal  to  them  the  hidden  springs 
of  our  Hfe,  knowing  that  we  shall  find  sympathy. 
These   are  they  we  link  together  into  the   select 

65 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

circle  of  our  real  friends.  As  we  migrate  on  the 
pathway  of  life  we  gather  them  around  one  by  one, 
and  put  them  on  our  heart  string  as  the  devotee 
strings  beads  on  her  rosary. 

The  rest  of  the  gamut  of  life  we  meet  in  the 
rialto  of  social  and  commercial  barter.  We  touch 
their  lives  by  necessity  or  by  choice,  and  render  to 
them  all  those  amenities  which  society  demands  and 
which  gentle  breeding  dictates,  but  they  never  touch 
our  inner  life.  We  deal  with  them  for  mutual 
advantage  in  a  material  way,  but  the  merchandise 
of  the  soul  we  do  not  exchange  with  them.  They 
are  separated  from  our  inmost  life  by  a  void 
which  nature  has  not  filled  in,  and  which  no  amount 
of  effort  is  able  to  bridge  over. 

Affinities  may  be  of  the  same  lineal  descent,  born 
under  the  same  roof,  and  nurtured  in  the  same 
domicile,  or  their  extraction  may  be,  as  it  commonly 
is,  very  remote  from  each  other.  The  bond  of  affiii- 
ity  may  link  together  souls  in  the  connubial  relation- 
ship, and  when  its  units  are  carefully  selected,  so  that 
each  is  the  counterpoise  of  the  soul,  vibrations  of  the 
other,  it  finds  its  most  perfect  manifestation.  There 
is  nothing  in  all  this  world  so  beautiful  as  the 
matrimonial  alliance  between  two  souls  who  are 
perfect  affinities.     But  to  see  people  flying  in  the 

66 


DRIFTING  WITHOUT  A  RUDDER 

face  of  the  laws  of  nature,  and  trying  to  wed 
together  what  God  never  intended  for  counter- 
parts is  the  daily  farce  which  society  never 
ceases  to  repeat  to  its  own  detriment.  This 
is  the  one  greatest  factor  for  rounding  out  the 
record  of  the  divorce  court  year  by  year.  People 
are  trying  to  make  water  run  up  hill,  and  the  pius 
folk  are  upbraiding  them  because  they  are  unable 
to  do  it. 

I  am  surprised  that  nature  has  not  provided  a 
means  of  more  careful  selection,  so  that  affinities 
generally,  instead  of  occasionally,  should  mate  to- 
gether. Perhaps  Socrates  was  right  when  he  thought 
to  develop  forbearance  by  marrying  a  shrew.  But 
the  average  mortal  would  be  willing  to  get  along 
without  the  forbearance,  rather  than  to  pay  such 
a  price  for  it.  In  a  lesser  degree  there  may  be  an 
advantage  in  a  matrimonial  alliance  of  two  people 
of  different  temperaments,  if  they  have  some  com- 
mon ground  to  stand  on,  some  part  of  their  soul 
vibrations  that  finds  mutual  counter-balance.  But 
God  pity  that  unfortunate  home  where  husband  and 
wife  are  entirely  and  completely  the  antithesis  of 
each  other.  The  divergence  of  such  a  couple  is 
like  the  lines  of  a  triangle;  the  farther  you  follow 
them  the  greater  becomes  their  separation.     And 

67 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

that  repulsive  force  which  drives  apart  husband 
and  wife  is  generally  communicated  to  their  off- 
spring, and  the  whole  family  group  find  themselves 
subtending  the  outer  circumference  of  a  centrifuge, 
the  diameter  of  which  increases  in  length  as  the 
years  roll  by. 

This  latter  condition  was  the  lot  of  our  Joseph 
and  Lenora,  after  the  play-life  was  ended,  and  they 
settled  down  to  the  serious  problems  of  life. 

She  was  gentle  and  refined,  and  gracious  in  her 
bearing,  with  a  sensitive  soul,  on  all  points,  of  justice 
and  honor ;  while  he  had  that  element  of  elasticity  in 
his  conscience  which  made  it  easy  for  him  to  adapt 
himself  to  little  unscrupulous  things  for  petty  per- 
sonal ends. 

He  thought  it  was  all  right  to  cheat,  and  to  take 
advantage  of  the  credulity  or  of  the  necessity  of 
others,  provided  he  could  so  conceal  his  act  that 
the  multitude  would  not  know  about  it.  He  be- 
lieved that  there  is  a  commercial  value  to  falsehood 
when  it  is  properly  safeguarded.  He  would  have 
been  horrified  at  this  expression  of  his  motives,  but 
secretly  to  himself  he  must  have  thought  it  out  in 
this  very  way.  And  the  community  where  he  lived 
was  not  slow  to  discover  these  innate  weaknesses  in 
his   character,   and   to  put   upon   him   the   proper 

68 


DRIFTING  WITHOUT  A  RUDDER 

rating.  The  man  who  thinks  he  can  cheat  and  tell 
lies  and  not  be  found  out  is  a  fool.  A  lie  will  pro- 
claim itself  sooner  or  later  from  the  housetop,  and  a 
fraudulent  action  will  read  itself  into  the  popular 
estimation  of  any  man  in  spite  of  himself. 

When  two  persons  of  such  divergent  temperament 
meet,  there  is  sure  to  be  conflict.  The  dove  who 
finds  herself  mated  with  a  hawk  will  soon  discover 
the  hopelessness  of  the  task  of  reforming  him,  and 
give  up  in  despair.  If  the  divergence  is  not  so 
diametrical,  and  the  contracting  parties  are  willing 
to  subdue  themselves,  and  to  give  and  take,  and 
withal  to  be  tolerant  of  one  another,  there  is  a 
possibility  of  establishing  common  ground  enough 
to  make  life  endurable.  But  when  dishonor  links 
itself  with  honor,  vice  with  virtue,  gross  vulgarity 
with  refinement,  cold  selfishness  with  benevolence, 
there  is  formed  a  combination  that  can  never  in  the 
nature  of  things  be  compatible.  And  these  were  the 
elements  which  Joseph  and  Lenora  were  trying 
to  harmonize;  these  were  the  heterogeneous  mental 
components  which  they  proposed  to  work  up  into  a 
homogeneous  mixture. 

But  the  faith  that  was  bom  of  infatuation  was 
soon  to  discover  its  own  defeat.  The  artificial 
semblance  of  refinement  which  Joseph  maintained 

69 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

through  the  nuptial  period  needed  only  a  suitable 
occasion  to  show  that  it  was  only  a  sham.  And  oc- 
casions came  thick  and  fast. 

Profanity  is  such  a  senseless  thing  that  one 
wonders  how  people  of  sanity  can  indulge  in  it.  If 
they  do  not  believe  in  a  God  it  is  silly  to  swear  by 
his  name,  and  if  they  do  believe  in  a  God  it  is  sacri- 
lege to  do  so.  The  reason  men  swear,  I  imagine, 
is  that  it  gives  them  a  chance  in  an  emphatic  way 
to  show  their  defiance  of  the  traditions  of  the 
church;  to  demonstrate  their  independence  of  all 
those  traditional  rules  of  conduct  which  society  col- 
lectively has  culled  from  the  best  precepts  of  the 
past  and  demanded  of  its  subjects  as  a  mark  of  re- 
spectability. The  profane  man  would  have  you 
know  that  if  he  chooses  to  go  to  hell  cross  lots  it  is 
nobody's  business  but  his  own,  and  he  does  not 
choose  to  be  hampered  in  his  privilege. 

Our  Joseph  was  given  to  profanity,  at  first  only 
periodically,  but  later  habitually.  Falsehood  came 
close  in  the  wake  of  it,  and  was  soon  so  flagrant 
that  no  eflFort  was  made  to  conceal  it. 

The  old  saying  that  birds  of  a  feather  flock 
together  is  wonderfully  true  to  life.  Joseph 
gathered  about  him  a  group  of  reckless  men 
who    prided    themselves    on    being    the    common 

70 


DRIFTING  WITHOUT  A  RUDDER 

enemy  of  religion  and  of  all  people  who  stood 
for  the  better  ideals  of  society.  He  became  an 
apostate  from  the  faith  of  his  fathers,  and  fought 
with  all  the  venom  of  his  perverted  nature  the  cause 
which  had  brought  his  parents  through  untold  hard- 
ships and  privations  over  the  trackless  plains  and 
planted  them  in  an  undeveloped  country  to  endure 
all  the  trials  of  pioneering.  This  they  did  to  pro- 
vide in  advance  for  his  comfort  and  well-being. 

It  would  be  unjust  to  demand  of  us  that  we  think 
the  same  thoughts  and  hold  the  same  opinions  that 
our  fathers  have  done.  The  world  would  not  prog- 
ress very  much  with  such  a  method.  As  the  world 
grows  in  experience,  we  must  expand  in  our  mental 
horizon  to  keep  pace  with  it.  But  our  expansion 
should  be  dignified  and  tolerant.  We  should  not 
ridicule  the  opinions  of  those  we  dissent  from,  and 
especially  those  opinions  which  have  meant  so  much 
in  the  lives  of  our  gray  haired  parents,  who  suffered 
all  things  for  their  loyalty  to  a  cause,  which  no 
matter  what  it  meant  to  others  was  a  potential 
moral  force  to  them.  The  apostate  who  justifies  the 
irregularities  of  his  own  perverted  life  by  attacking 
the  creed  he  was  born  and  bred  in  is  a  traitor  at 
heart  no  matter  what  the  creed  he  is  attacking. 

In  my  experience  apostates  from  any  of  the  creeds 
71 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

have  been  among  the  most  bitter  and  vindictive 
people  I  have  ever  known.  And  Joseph  was  no 
exception  to  the  rule.  He  became  the  inveterate 
enemy  of  all  authority,  ecclesiastical  or  secular.  He 
read  into  the  lives  of  all  men  who  held  positions 
of  trust  motives  of  the  basest  kind,  and  gnashed  his 
teeth  as  he  related  their  alleged  misdeeds.  He  was 
like  the  Bible  description  of  Esau — his  hand  was 
against  every  man,  and  every  man's  hand  was 
against  him.  The  very  ostracism  that  grew  out 
of  his  relentless  raillery  was  interpreted  as  a  deliber- 
ate conspiracy  against  him.  Everybody  and  every- 
thing seemed  wrong  except  himself.  His  diminu- 
tive soul  arrayed  itself  against  all  the  better 
instincts  of  life.  The  importunity  of  the 
poor  and  the  needy  fell  upon  deaf  ears  when 
any  appeal  came  up  to  him.  He  disclaimed 
any  responsibility  for  their  condition,  and  shifted 
accordingly  all  obligation  for  their  relief.  If  God 
made  the  poor,  he  used  to  say,  then  God  should 
provide  the  means  to  maintain  them.  He  was 
entirely  blind  to  the  fact  that  charity  is  a  greater 
blessing  to  the  one  who  gives  than  to  the  one  who 
receives.  From  the  standpoint  of  the  beggar,  our 
gift  which  relieves  his  hunger  is  the  gratification 
of  a  passing  desire,  and  to-morrow  he  is  back  at 

72 


DRIFTING  WITHOUT  A  RUDDER 

the  same  old  place,  with  the  same  old  desire  gnaw- 
ing at  his  vitals. 

I  once  had  a  friend  who,  as  he  was  driving  on  a 
country  road,  met  a  huge  muscular  young  fellow 
trudging  along  in  the  role  of  tramp.  My  friend 
stopped  his  carriage  when  the  young  man  accosted 
him  and  begged  for  a  ride.  "Where  are  you 
going?"  inquired  the  man  in  the  carriage,  and  the 
tramp  replied:  "I  don't  know;  I  have  no  place  to 
go ;  I  am  drifting  somewhere."  "If  I  were  to  spend 
the  strength  of  my  horse  to  pull  you  seventeen 
miles  and  put  you  down  in  the  town  where  I  am 
going,"  said  my  friend,  "you  would  be  no  nearer 
your  destination  than  you  are  now.  You  might 
as  well  be  where  you  are." 

And  from  the  standpoint  of  the  beggar  this  is  just 
about  what  our  indiscriminate  charity  amounts  to. 
We  assuage  the  hunger  of  to-day,  but  to-morrow 
the  morsel  we  gave  is  gone,  and  the  same  sense  of 
hunger  is  back  worse  than  ever.  We  do  even  worse 
than  that.  For  each  time  a  human  being  stultifies 
his  soul  to  beg  gifts  from  another  human  being  he 
takes  a  stride  downward  in  the  way  of  humiliation 
and  soul-distintegration,  which  tends  to  bring  about 
the  total  extinction  of  all  semblance  of  character. 

Mendacity  is  a  continuous  discount  on  manhood. 
73 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

From  a  par  value  of  one  hundred  per  cent,  which 
is  the  birthright  of  each  individual,  the  first  offense 
strikes  out  ninety  per  cent,  and  the  remainder  soon 
shrinks  to  the  zero  mark.  The  only  charity  that  is 
really  in  the  interest  of  the  recipient  is  a  provision 
whereby  he  can  help  himself,  and  return  value  re- 
ceived for  the  benefit  bestowed. 

Your  free  gifts  to  beggars  and  donations  to  sots 
are  in  their  ultimate  results  not  charitable  but  bane- 
ful. The  bestowal  of  benefits  in  the  proper  way 
is  a  social  problem  which  has  not  yet  been  solved. 
But  to  us  as  individuals  comes  the  daily  prayer 
of  the  afflicted,  and  we  are  expected  to  act  in  the 
present  moment.  This  hungry  man  cannot  to-day 
undo  the  errors  of  his  life,  though  he  is  well  aware 
that  his  present  plight  is  a  result  of  them.  But  he 
must  have  food  to-day  or  he  will  famish.  The  error 
I  am  obliged  to  commit  to  prevent  him  from  starv- 
ing is  an  inevitable  result  of  the  failure  of  society 
to  g^ve  him  a  chance  to  help  himself.  I  cannot 
inaugurate  a  system  in  a  moment,  but  I  can  relieve  a 
suflfering  fellow  creature  of  his  hunger  whenever  I 
will.  By  a  social  error  which  I  am  in  no  way 
responsible  for  I  am  obliged  to  conspire  against  the 
integrity  of  his  soul  whenever  I  put  forth  my  hand 
to  relieve  his  affliction. 

74 


DRIFTING  WITHOUT  A  RUDDER 

But  to  me  who  has  this  priceless  opportunity  of 
soul  discipline,  there  is  to  be  a  lasting  benefit,  not 
to  be  measured  by  worldly  standards.  Whenever 
I  can  sacrifice  my  own  feelings  and  take  up  the 
cause  of  another  human  being  who  is  in  need,  the 
consciousness  of  the  role  I  am  playing  as  benefactor 
— as  savior — leaves  its  impression  upon  my  mind 
and  augments  my  stock  of  character.  The  beggar 
gets  a  transcient  benefit  which  to-morrow  is  no 
benefit  at  all,  but  my  reward  is  eternal.  My  ten- 
ure of  worldly  possessions  is  transient,  but  the 
assets  of  my  soul  are  self-perpetuating  and  will  en- 
dure forever.  And  this  phase  of  charity  is  just  what 
men  of  small  souls  never  can  comprehend.  When 
by  accident  or  by  external  pressure  they  are  moved 
to  do  a  generous  deed,  they  seek  an  immediate  re- 
ward by  sounding  a  trumpet,  that  the  multitude 
might  praise  them,  and  thereby  increase  their  credit 
among  men.  They  choose  the  baubles  of  this  world 
in  lieu  of  the  riches  of  eternity  for  their  reward 
and  do  not  recognize  the  error. 

And  this  was  the  unfortunate  mental  condition  of 
him  whose  life  we  are  reviewing.  He  took  ad- 
vantage of  every  opportunity  that  presented  itself 
to  gouge  and  defraud  his  neighbors,  until  they  lost 
all  confidence  in  him.      Friendship  was  an  unknown 

75 


AFTER  TWENTY  YEARS 

quantity  in  his  life.  The  love  of  his  fellow  man 
he  never  dreamed  of.  The  lust  of  gain  was  the  one 
thing  that  overshadowed  his  soul  completely.  And 
the  generous  hearted  Lenora  found  herself  hedged 
about  so  completely  that  she  had  to  shrink  down  to 
his  dimensions  for  the  peace  of  her  home.  If  she 
had  been  possessed  of  more  strength  of  character, 
she  might  have  asserted  herself  and  dominated  the 
situation,  but  she  allowed  herself  to  be  completely 
overshadowed  by  this  man  of  strong  impulses,  and 
her  fine  personality  was  buried  amidst  the  chaotic 
contents  of  their  inhospitable  home.  All  the  poetry 
of  youth  went  out  of  her  life,  and  the  fine  sentiment 
which  had  woven  itself  Into  the  fabric  of  her  dreams. 
Days  of  emptiness  were  followed  by  nights  of  re- 
gret. The  years  multiplied  over  her,  the  finger  of 
Time  made  rude  tracings  on  her  countenance,  and 
the  early  autumn  frosts  played  havoc  with  her 
golden  tresses. 

If  the  young  woman  of  twenty  summers,  with  all 
the  charms  that  accompany  her  age  and  sex  could 
see  the  disintegrating  process  of  the  next  twenty 
years  as  I  have  seen  them  on  numerous  occasions; 
if  she  could  see  the  young  man  of  her  dreams  skulk 
like  a  coward,  when  he  was  confronted  with  situa- 
tions where  courage  was  demanded ;  if  she  could  see 

76 


DRIFTING  WITHOUT  A  RUDDER 

selfishness  dominating  his  life,  vice  sapping*  hi/s 
strength,  improvidence  dissipating  his  substance ;  she 
would  stop  to  ponder  well  the  consequences  of  that 
fatal  step,  which  is  to  place  her  happiness  entirely  in 
the  keeping  of  another.  Fortunately  this  picture  is 
an  extreme  one,  and  the  full  measure  of  its  unfor- 
tunate development  is  not  often  duplicated  in  actual 
experience,  but  in  a  lesser  degree  the  direful  conse- 
quences of  matrimonial  misalliances  are  everywhere 
to  be  seen.  People  are  selling  out  their  birthright 
of  happiness  and  satisfaction  for  apples  of  the  Dead 
Sea  which  all  too  soon  turn  to  ashes. 

If  our  winsome  Lenora  could  have  but  projected 
her  mind  twenty  years  into  the  future,  and  seen  the 
appalling  picture  of  her  home  that  was  to  be,  faith 
nullified  and  all  the  better  instincts  of  life  blotted 
out;  if  she  could  have  seen  her  children  bred  in 
selfishness  and  schooled  in  dishonor;  if  she  could 
have  seen  the  premature  markings  of  the  finger  of 
time  upon  her  once  comely  countenance  as  she  now 
sees  them;  if  she  could  have  seen  herself  bending 
beneath  the  weight  of  years  at  a  time  when  she 
should  have  been  in  the  zenith  of  her  glory,  I  think 
she  would  have  annulled  that  fatal  contract  which 
held  in  its  fulfillment  such  direful  consequences. 

Let  us  drop  the  curtain  now  in  the  hope  that  the 
77 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

full  measure  of  her  discomfiture  has  been  realized, 
and  that  the  future  years  may  provide  some  mitiga- 
tion for  that  situation  which  has  so  far  been  full  of 
disappointment  and  distress. 


78 


CHAPTER  VI 

THE  GREATER  SATISFACTION 

I  HAVE  issued  a  special  venire.  I  am  calling  up 
whom  I  will  of  the  old  familiar  group  for  wit- 
nesses. In  the  language  of  scripture  I  say,  "Samuel, 
Samuel,  where  art  thou  ?"  And  in  my  memory  there 
comes  up  the  picture  of  a  splendid  boy,  whose  hero- 
ism in  the  lowly  walks  of  life,  and  whose  magnani- 
mity of  soul  were  beautiful  to  contemplate.  We  will 
take  only  a  look  into  his  majestic  life  as  I  see  it  now 
in  perspective,  and  then  behold  him  crossing  the 
bar,  with  all  his  spiritual  canvas  stretched  to 
the  breeze,  illuminated  with  faith  and  prescience 
supernatural.  We  will  draw  from  his  life  and 
frim  his  death  such  lessons  of  philosophy  as 
they  suggest,  and  open  our  minds,  I  trust,  to 
whatever  truth  they  may  indicate.  If  the  story 
of  his  life  and  death  seems  overdrawn,  the  reader 
must  remember  that  facts  are  sometimes  stranger 
than  fiction. 

He  was  one  of  those  precocious  souls,  who  come 
over  the  social  horizon  and  display  their  spiritual 
glory  as  the  comet  comes  out  of  the  abyss  to  illum- 

79 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

inate  briefly  the  midnight  sky  and  then  recedes  into 
the  great  unknown,  leaving  only  the  memory  behind 
to  fix  itself  in  our  consciousness. 

Samuel  was  the  son  of  a  widow,  who  was  left  in 
poverty  to  battle  with  the  world  and  to  provide  the 
ways  and  means  of  supporting  a  large  group  of 
helpless  children,  and  he  was  the  mainstay  of  the 
family.  He  was  slender  of  stature,  frail  and  weakly, 
but  he  had  a  soul  in  him  that  was  great  and  noble. 

Among  the  men  and  women  who  toil  there  are 
some  of  the  kings  and  queens  of  the  earth,  judged 
by  the  motives  and  methods  of  their  lives,  and  the 
things  that  in  their  limited  sphere  they  accomplish. 
I  take  off  my  hat  to  the  toiler  who  works  with 
a  lofty  purpose,  no  matter  how  circumscribed  the 
sphere  in  which  he  is  held.  The  boy  who  fights 
the  battles  of  a  widowed  mother  and  helpless 
brothers  and  sisters,  is  a  hero,  no  matter  what  the 
world  may  say  of  his  low  estate.  Capacity  he  may 
or  may  not  have,  but  a  soul  of  transcendent  nobility 
can  never  be  denied  him. 

And  this  brave  lad  whom  the  boys  called  Sam  was 
such  a  one.  As  farmer,  as  sheep-herder,  as  man  of 
all  work  he  toiled  incessantly,  and  every  dollar  of 
his  meagre  wages  went  into  the  family  coffer.  He 
was  content  to  go  in  rags  and  tatters,  to  endure 

80 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

hunger  and  cold  and  all  kinds  of  privation  to  main- 
tain the  family  respectability.  He  was  willing  to 
forego  schools,  to  live  in  the  wilderness  as  a  hermit, 
to  work  winter  as  well  as  summer,  that  the  younger 
and  more  dependent  members  of  the  household 
might  acquire  the  rudiments  of  an  education,  and 
thus  be  better  prepared  to  make  their  way  in  the 
world. 

Goodness  of  this  kind  is  not  born  of  precept,  is 
not  the  result  of  example.  It  is  an  inborn  quality 
of  the  soul,  a  gift  from  God.  Heredity  in  this  case 
had  nothing  to  do  with  it.  The  father  was  a  worth- 
less wretch  who  early  forsook  the  family  and  became 
a  common  vagabond,  and  the  mother  was  quite 
mediocre  in  her  mentality,  and  was  possessed  of  no 
particular  characteristics  of  mind  or  soul  to  dis- 
tinguish her  from  the  humble  class  to  which  she  be- 
longed. 

Heredity  and  environment  are  supposed  to  be  the 
two  great  factors  in  the  mental  make  up  of  people. 
But  when  we  have  given  full  credit  to  these  and 
strained  a  point  to  make  them  fit  in  with  peculiar 
conditions  there  is  still  a  residuum  of  characteristics 
unexplained,  a  birthright  from  the  great  unknown 
source  of  mental  power,  an  endowment  direct  from 
the  hand  of  the  Creator.    The  appearance  of  those 

81 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

meteor-like  intellects  that  come  sometimes  from  the 
abyss  and  project  themselves  athwart  the  heavens 
and  startle  the  world,  are  not  the  product  of  environ- 
ment. They  are  quite  the  antithesis  of  that.  And 
when  we  explain  them  from  the  standpoint  of  her- 
edity, and  say  that  they  represent  mental  character- 
istics converging  from  away  back,  we  draw  on  our 
imagination  for  explanations  we  can  by  no  means 
substantiate. 

Sam  was  not  a  reader  of  books,  for  his  limited 
income  and  the  pressing  necessities  of  his  kindred 
forbade  the  purchase  of  them.  But  the  great  open 
book  of  nature  was  his  daily  instructor,  and  he  read 
from  its  pages  a  message  simple  and  direct,  untram- 
meled  by  the  phraseology  of  the  pedants.  His  mind 
was  not  burdened  with  a  painful  Latin  nomenclature 
of  flowers,  but  his  soul  vibrated  to  the  amplitude  of 
the  daisy  and  the  bluebell  and  the  sweet  William 
that  grew  upon  his  native  heath.  The  song  of  every 
bird  and  the  murmur  of  every  brook  found  a  re- 
sponse in  his  untutored  soul.  He  was  kindred  to 
everything  that  is  beautiful  and  harrhonious  and 
true. 

Who  shall  say  that  the  world  did  not  have  as 
much  for  him  as  for  the  academic  folk?  Who  shall 
call  him  ignorant  who  opens  his  soul  to  the  truth 

82 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

and  thrills  with  every  vibration  of  mellifluous  sound 
and  harmonious  color.  What  does  education  do  for 
'us  but  to  teach  us  how  to  appreciate?  And  if  we 
have  the  instinct  of  appreciation  already  with  us, 
then  nature  has  anticipated  our  education  and  paved 
the  way  for  the  higher  instruction  which  deals  with 
the  generalizations,  and  establishes  the  proper  cor- 
relation of  things.  True  education  establishes  its 
foundation  on  the  natural  intuitions  and  develops 
these  into  the  higher  processes  of  thought  and  emo- 
tion. But  the  man  who  has  slavishly  committed  to 
memory  the  formulae  of  books  and  thinks  by  rote  is 
an  ignoramous,  however  high-sounding  his  title. 
The  pedant  is  at  best  a  copyist,  while  the  man  of 
instuition  is  a  real  creator. 

The  poetic  conceptions  are  common  to  all  those 
minds  that  appreciate  the  beautiful  things  of  the 
world.  But  some  have  the  power  to  translate  them 
into  words — ^to  link  together  in  melodious  cadences 
those  interdependent  things  which  the  ordinary  mind 
grasps  in  thought  but  cannot  convey  to  others  be- 
cause of  the  inability  to  muster  suitable  symbols. 
All  men  are  poets  in  thought;  while  a  limited  few 
out  of  each  generation  are  poets  in  actual  fact. 

And  the  same  thing  is  true  in  art. 

The  most  perfect  picture  of  a  landscape  is  only  a 
83 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

symbol,  when  you  think  of  the  real  landscape  glisten- 
ing with  the  morning  dew,  and  vibrating  with  life 
at  every  tangent.  There  are  many  who  have  the 
aesthetic  instinct,  and  feel  the  full  emotion  of  such 
things.  But  a  few  out  of  the  multitude  receive  the 
impression  with  such  power  that  they  can  repro- 
duce morphology  and  color  with  measurable  exact- 
ness.   And  these  we  call  artists. 

For  poetry  existed  before  time  was,  and  land- 
scapes were  beautiful  as  ever  in  the  ancient  unknown 
aeons  when  the  footprint  of  man  had  never  been 
upon  this  earth.  I  know  the  rainbow  with  all  its 
glory  was  here,  and  the  blue  dome  was  covered 
betimes  with  fleecy  clouds,  and  the  cooling  showers 
of  summer  bathed  the  face  of  nature  while  yet  the 
only  tenants  of  the  earth  were  animals  of  an  inferior 
sort.  For  side  by  side  with  their  bones,  preserved 
as  fossils  in  the  rocks,  we  find  the  unmistakable  im- 
print of  raindrops,  which  fell  upon  the  sands  of  the 
seashore,  and  became  covered  with  the  silt  from 
the  water  to  preserve  their  record  for  all  time. 

We  need  the  poet  and  the  artist,  not  so  much  to 
aid  us  in  the  present  interpretation  and  appreciation 
of  the  harmonies  of  nature,  but  to  preserve  these 
things  that  they  may  be  handed  down  to  generations 
yet  unborn,  that  their  accumulated  store  may  become 

84 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

the  heirloom  of  the  ages,  the  crystallized  sentiment  of 
the  world,  the  collected  emotions  of  all  who  have 
thrilled  and  borne  record  of  the  thing  that  stirred 
them. 

Our  friend  Samuel  was  just  one  of  those  unpre- 
tending simple  souls  who  opened  his  heart  to  the 
truth  and  by  instinct  translated  it  into  terms  of  his 
life.  He  knew  the  flowers  that  bloomed  upon  a 
hundred  hills  over  which  he  daily  drove  his  master's 
flocks,  he  knew  the  song  of  every  bird  which  carolled 
from  the  woodland,  he  was  a  friend  to  the  wild  hare 
and  the  squirrel,  and  the  multitude  of  small  creatures 
that  swarm  in  the  valleys  and  upon  the  hills. 
Though  he  could  not  give  them  their  proper  zoolog- 
ical name,  he  knew  the  method  of  their  life  and  his 
soul  went  out  in  sympathy  to  them. 

But  the  magnitude  of  his  soul  was  best  seen  in  the 
family  circle,  where  he  did  the  work  of  a  minister- 
ing angel. 

With  the  mature  judgment  of  a  man  of  exper- 
ience he  reasoned  with  his  mother  about  ways  and 
means,  and  with  all  the  solicitude  of  the  father  of 
a  family  he  made  plans  for  the  education  and  train- 
ing of  the  younger  brothers  and  sisters.  He  was 
scrupulously  honest  and  kept  the  family  credit  above 
reproach,  though  sometimes  hunger  and  privation 

85 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

made  inroads  upon  them.  He  was  generous  and 
hospitable,  though  he  could  ill  afford  to  bestow  his 
hard-earned  wages  for  the  entertainment  of  others. 
The  old  saying  that  honesty  is  the  best  policy  is 
wonderfully  true.  A  name  for  honest  dealing  is  a 
good  stock  in  trade  for  any  man.  It  has  a  cash  value 
that  grows  as  he  grows  in  financial  strength.  It  is 
an  asset  in  the  commercial  world  that  carries  its  own 
insurance  and  remains  in  force  so  long  as  the  posses- 
sor lives.  The  man  who  fails  to  meet  his  obligation 
when  due  is  a  worse  enemy  to  himself  than  to  any- 
body else.  The  man  who  thinks  he  can  gain  ad- 
vantage by  dodging  his  creditor  is  like  the  ostrich 
which,  when  pursued,  hides  its  head  in  the 
thicket.  Sooner  or  later  you  must  satisfy  every 
obligation  you  have  incurred,  or  it  will  abstract  from 
your  financial  potency  a  tenfold  payment.  You  can- 
not evade  the  truth.  You  may  seem  to  parry  for  a 
time  this  or  that  unpleasant  obligation,  but  sooner 
or  later  you  will  have  to  confront  it  face  to  face,  and 
often  you  will  meet  with  chagrin  and  a  fallen  counte- 
nance what  you  might  have  met  in  the  beginning  with 
head  erect  and  dignity  uncompromised.  It  is  better 
to  present  to  everything  and  everybody  a  bold  front. 
To  meet  the  truth  of  every  day  without  trying  to 
evade  it,  to  feel  the  dignity  that  abides  in  every  soul 

86 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

which  has  shaken  off  the  groveling  things  of  the 
world  and  arisen  to  that  stratum  of  thought  where 
truth  and  purity  are  the  natural  elements  that  sur- 
round us — this  is  the  only  condition  of  Ufe  that  is 
worth  while. 

The  countless  millions  who  walk  the  way  of  carnal 
gratification  have  never  tasted  what  real  life  is.  They 
go  forth  to  play  with  the  baubles  of  the  world  as 
the  child  finds  amusement  in  his  gew  gaws,  and 
when  the  day  is  ended  and  the  reverie  of  eventide 
comes,  the  soul  recoils  upon  itself,  and  feels  all  the 
remorse  that  must  follow  the  contemplation  of  lost 
opportunity.  Wilfully  to  cut  off  from  our  life  its 
sources  of  mental  and  spiritual  replenishment,  to 
sever  ourselves  from  that  natural  inflow  of  the  in- 
spiration that  is  the  birthright  of  us  all,  is  to  exclude 
from  our  life  the  only  part  of  it  that  means  growth 
and  expansion  toward  a  definite  end. 

When  Satan  took  Christ  to  the  high  mountain  and 
showed  him  all  the  glory  of  the  world  and  said,  "This 
will  I  give  thee  if  thou  wilt  bow  down  and  worship 
me,"  he  spoke  a  truth  that  is  common  in  life.  Al- 
ways there  is  before  us  the  two  pathways,  the  carnal 
and  the  spiritual,  the  one  of  ephemerial  delights  and 
the  other  of  that  greater  satisfaction  which  contem- 
plates not  only  the  present  hour,  but  takes  in  the 

87 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

whole  scope  of  our  mental  activities  here  and  here- 
after. Each  individual  interprets  the  world  from  one 
of  these  viewpoints.  If  the  landscape  has  a  message 
of  spirituality  for  me,  then  in  its  wonderful  com- 
position I  see  the  handiwork  of  an  all-wise  Creator, 
and  through  Him  a  purpose  in  my  present  relation- 
ships. But  if  I  look  at  it  only  with  the  carnal  eye, 
it  means  that  my  relationship  is  accidental,  and  that 
I  shall  wither  and  vanish  from  the  earth,  and  be 
known  no  more  in  the  midst  of  these  delights,  which 
must  now  minister  to  the  aesthetic  tastes  of  others 
who  are  aliens  and  strangers  to  me. 

But  I  am  forgetting  that  I  am  describing  the  life 
of  an  actual  person,  whose  experiences  brought  up 
in  my  mind  all  these  thoughts. 

Into  the  little  family  circle  which  was  defended 
by  this  brave  boy,  there  came  a  day  of  great  dis- 
quietude and  worry.  The  shadowing  wings  of  the 
angel  of  death  hovered  over  them,  and  seemed 
to  mark  as  its  victim  him  who  was  the  protector  and 
guardian  of  all  the  rest.  For  xiays  and  days  to- 
gether he  suffered  excruciating  pain,  and  hung  in 
the  balance  between  life  and  death.  But  always  the 
same  serenity  of  spirit  was  with  him,  and  always 
the  same  smile  of  resignation  beamed  from  his 
manly  countenance.     The  family  was  overwhelmed 

88 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

with  the  impending  calamity,  and  stood  helpless  and 
dumb  in  the  face  of  their  grief.  But  friends  rallied 
from  every  quarter,  and  his  sickness  was  the  af- 
fair of  the  whole  village.  Willing  hands  were  ready 
for  every  service  possible,  and  no  sacrifice  was  too 
great  for  the  meanest  of  his  friends  and  neighbors 
to  make. 

The  denizens  of  cities  can  have  no  idea  of  that 
fraternal  bond  which  brings  people  of  the  smaller 
communities  to  a  unit  in  a  common  cause  of  mutual 
aid;  that  makes  the  home  of  affliction  the  rallying 
ground  for  whole  towns  and  whole  districts,  regard- 
less of  age  or  sex  or  social  distinction.  The  pure 
democracy  of  fraternalism  is  known  only  to  the 
country  town.  The  city  has  only  the  aristocratic 
form  of  it ;  and  this  is  so  much  modified  by  interests 
and  counter  interests,  by  social  and  commercial  dis- 
tinctions, that  it  loses  most  of  its  identity  as  a  co- 
hesive social  force.  In  my  experience  as  physician 
I  have  many  times  witnessed  that  beautiful  abandon 
of  all  self-interest  in  the  cause  of  others  which  is 
characteristic  of  the  rural  districts,  and  to  me  it  is 
the  nearest  approach  to  the  Christ-life  of  anything 
I  have  ever  known. 

In  the  precincts  of  this  meagre  home  the  spirit 
of    fraternalism    suffused    itself.     Unselfish    hands 

89 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

ministered  hourly  to  the  comforts  of  the  suffering 
boy.  Day  after  day  brought  no  change  for  a  long 
time.  The  little  assurance  that  came  with  the  morn- 
ing light  was  dispelled  with  the  shades  of  the  even- 
ing, and  the  darkness  of  each  night  accentuated  all 
the  forebodings  that  kindred  and  friends  were  wont 
to  indulge  in. 

Just  why  the  temperature  and  pulse  and  all  the 
symptoms  of  a  patient  should  become  so  much 
less  favorable  in  the  evening  than  in  the  morning 
has  always  been  an  unsolved  problem  with  the  med- 
ical fraternity.  Aurora,  the  goddess  of  the  morning, 
seems  to  have  healing  in  her  wings  as  she  rises  from 
the  eastern  horizon  to  initiate  the  activities  of  a 
newborn  day.  But  the  sombre  shades  of  the'  night 
are  depressing  to  the  spirits,  and  except  as  they  are 
utilized  for  slumber,  bring  doubt  and  discouragement 
to  the  mind.  I  believe  that  much  of  the  change 
in  the  physical  condition  of  persons  in  bodily  af- 
affliction  is  due  to  the  psychological  effects  of  light 
and  darkness  upon  them. 

When  we  see  our  friends  languishing  in  beds  of 
affliction  we  are  wont  to  ask  ourselves,  Why  should 
there  be  suffering  in  the  world?  why  could  not  the 
Creator  who  had  all  things  at  his  disposal  have 
ruled  out  sickness  and  poverty  and  vice    and  all 

90 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

those  things  that  bring  down  the  soul  of  man  in 
humiliation  and  distress?  But  for  these  things  this 
earth  would  be  a  paradise,  and  every  day  a  day  of 
jubilee  to  every  soul  that  has  received  the  privilege 
of  life.  And  man  instead  of  a  fallen  being,  grovel- 
ing in  the  dust  of  the  earth,  sinking  in  his  degener- 
acy to  a  level  beneath  the  brute  creation  would  be 
crowned  with  honor  and  dignity  and  majesty. 

Why  does  the  Utopian  dream  of  the  millennium 
have  to  be  postponed  in  our  minds  until  another 
hypothetical  stage  of  our  being  shall  arise  from  the 
portals  of  death  to  behold  a  world  recreated,  when 
we  have  all  the  elements  of  it  here  with  us  now? 
And  why  does  the  hand  of  the  destroyer  strike, 
without  mercy,  without  remorse,  without  the  sem- 
blance of  justice  at  the  widow's  son,  at  the  mother 
of  helpless  children,  at  the  brilliant  star  in  the  family 
constellation?  To  all  appearances  it  does  seem 
that  the  destiny  of  individuals,  in  this  world,  as 
also  the  destiny  of  nations,  is  left  to  the  caprice  of 
blind,  unreasoning  force  which  knows  neither  mercy 
nor  justice  nor  remorse.  Human  conceptions  of 
right  and  wrong  seem  to  have  no  place  in  the  great 
world  process. 

The  stupendous  mundane  machine  seems  to  put 
men  and  women  through  its  compartments  with  as 

91 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

little  concern  as  any  other  machine  deals  with  inani- 
mate commodities.  If  by  chance  an  individual  falls 
into  the  gearing  and  gets  ground  to  powder,  it  is  a 
matter  of  absolute  indifference  to  the  machine. 
Kindred  and  friends  may  weep,  but  the  cosmic  pro- 
cess deals  neither  in  tears  nor  smiles.  Its  grim 
visage  is  unmoved  by  any  passion,  its  inexorable 
routine  unabated  by  any  mischance. 

Is  there  any  meaning  in  this  apparent  neglect  on 
the  part  of  nature  of  the  interests  of  its  most  vital 
elements  ? 

I  shall  answer  this  pertinent  question  by  relating 
an  old  legend,  which  comes  down  to  us  from  the 
Dark  Ages  a  reflex  of  mediaeval  mental  processes, 
which  we  can  disregard  as  a  story,  but  which  has 
in  it  a  truth  most  vital  in  its  application. 

Once  upon  a  time  an  angel  came  down  from 
heaven  to  sojourn  with  a  hermit.  The  two  went 
forth  on  a  journey  together,  depending  for  their 
sustenance  on  the  charity  of  the  people  thef  should 
meet.  At  the  close  of  the  first  day  they  were  enter- 
tained by  a  stranger,  who  took  them  to  his  home, 
spread  before  them  a  sumptuous  repast,  and  lavished 
upon  them  every  attention  his  household  could 
furnish.    The  lord  of  the  house  was  particularly  en- 

92 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

thusiastic  in  his  eulogy  of  a  certain  goblet  of  g^eat 
beauty  which  had  been  presented  to  him  by  an 
eminent  man  and  which  he  prized  above  all  other 
things  in  his  possession.  After  the  dinner  was 
served  the  two  guests  were  conducted  to  a  sleeping 
apartment  and  lay  down  for  the  night. 

When  everything  was  quiet  they  rose.  The  angel 
seized  the  beautiful  goblet  and,  concealing  it  under 
his  robe,  they  made  their  way  off  stealthily  and  be- 
took themselves  again  to  the  country  road. 

The  next  night  they  were  entertained  in  the  city 
by  another  wealthy  man,  who  vied  with  his  predeces- 
sor in  bestowing  hospitality  upon  them. 

Into  this  household  there  had  been  bom  recently 
a  son,  who  was  the  applet  of  their  eye  because  he 
came  to  a  childless  home  and  was  the  last  hope  of 
the  family  lineage.  When  all  retired  to  slumber, 
the  two  guests  rose  again,  and  the  angel  felt  his 
way  through  the  room  to  the  cradle  and  strangled 
the  child  to  death.  Then  they  went  out  into  the 
darkness  and  made  their  escape. 

The  just  mind  of  the  hermit  rose  in  rebellion  at 
such  apparent  m justice.  With  difficulty  he  re- 
strained himself  from  complaining  aloud,  but  he 
said,  "It  is  an  angel  of  God,  and  surely  the  ways 
of  the  Lord  must  be  right."    So  he  bided  his  time 

93 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

and  journeyed  onward  with  his  celestial  companion.' 

As  they  were  crossing  the  river  on  a  narrow  bridge 
a  stranger  met  them  in  the  middle  of  the  stream, 
whom  the  angel  accosted  and  of  whom  he  inquired 
the  way.  The  man  turned  to  point  out  the  direc- 
tion of  the  road,  and  the  angel  pushed  him  into  the 
water,  and  he  was  drowned. 

With  much  difficulty  the  hermit  restrained  himself 
from  complaining,  for  his  companion  seemed  to  de- 
light in  base  ingratitude,  and  did  things  which  out- 
raged humanity  and  violated  every  law  of  justice 
and  propriety.  But  he  said,  "It  is  an  angel  of  God, 
and  surely  there  must  be  righteousness  in  his  ac- 
tions." 

Then  they  journeyed  into  a  drear  wilderness. 
Darkness  came  on,  and  the  bleak  wind  bore  in  upon 
them,  and  they  were  in  much  distress.  In  the  dis- 
tance they  saw  a  light  toward  which  they  made 
their  way  in  the  hope  that  they  would  find  entertain- 
ment. But  the  man  of  the  house  was  gruflf  and 
uncouth  and  treated  them  very  harshly.  He  sent 
them  into  his  pig  sty  to  sleep  and  refused  to  give 
them  even  a  crust  of  bread  to  satisfy  their  hunger. 

In  the  morning  when  they  came  forth  from  their 
miserable  bed  chamber,  the  angel  accosted  their  host 
and  thanked  him  most  kindly  for  the  entertainment 

94 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

and  presented  him  with  the  golden  goblet  which  he 
had  purloined  from  their  first  friend.  The  indigna- 
tion of  the  hermit  knew  no  bounds,  and  he  railed 
on  his  companion  vehemently.  "Every  person,"  he 
said,  "who  has  treated  us  kindly  you  have  rewarded 
with  base  injustice  and  horrible  cruelty,  and  the 
only  one  who  has  been  harsh  and  brutal  you  outdid 
yourself  to  fawn  upon  and  presented  him  with  a 
princely  reward.  This  is  contrary  to  every  principle 
of  justice  and  humanity,  and  must  be  wrong  even 
though  an  angel  from  the  throne  of  grace  stands 
voucher  for  it." 

Then  the  angel  chided  his  friend.  "You  are 
passing  the  judgment  that  mankind  in  general 
passes  without  full  knowledge  of  the  thing  you 
are  judging.  Listen  to  me  and  I  shall  explain  in 
simple  terms  the  paradoxes  which  have  caused  you 
such  disquietude.  Then  you  will  perceive  that  the 
judgments  of  God  are  righteous  though  they  may 
seem  an  absolute  contradiction  to  the  judgments 
of  finite  minds. 

"The  man  from  whom  we  took  the  golden  goblet 
had  been  temperate  in  all  his  ways,  and  had  passed 
the  crisis  of  his  life  in  safety,  but  this  beautiful  gift 
of  a  valued  friend  was  such  an  important  object  to 
him  that  he  filled  anc^  refilled  it  with  wine,  and  was 

95 


AFTER   TWENTY. YEARS 

on  the  high  way  to  become  a  drunkard.  By  taking 
this  temptation  out  of  his  life  we  stopped  the  down- 
ward process  that  had  him  in  its  tow,  and  sent  him 
forth  to  reassert  the  majesty  of  manhood  undebased 
by  vicious  habits. 
"The  man  who  was  parent  to  the  child  we  destroyed 
had  been  noted  for  his  charity.  He  had  given  of  his 
goods  without  stint  to  the  poor  and  the  needy,  and 
all  men  blessed  him  for  his  broad  humanity  and  his 
kindness  to  all  who  were  unfortunate.  But  when 
this  son  came  into  the  home  that  had  been  childless, 
the  desire  to  bestow  upon  him  all  the  advantages 
that  were  fitting  to  the  heir  of  a  great  household  and 
a  landed  estate,  became  the  absorbing  passion  of  his 
life.  All  his  humane  ideas  were  narrowed  down  to 
this  one  individual,  and  his  soul  began  to  shrivel  up. 
By  removing  from  his  life  this  one  great  impedi- 
ment we  opened  once  again  the  floodgates  of  his 
soul,  and  permitted  the  inflow  of  that  great  tide  of 
humanity,  without  which  his  life  would  have  shrunk 
to  a  vanishing  point  and  disappeared  from  the  active 
world. 

"The  man  whom  we  pushed  from  the  bridge  was 
just  nearing  the  climax  of  a  plot  which  would  have 
reddened  his  hands  with  the  blood  of  his  fellow- 
man  and  blighted  soul  and  body  alike.    By  thus  de- 

96 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

priving  him  of  his  own  life,  we  rescued  his  name 
from  the  ignominy  of  a  murderer,  and  his  Soul  from 
a  crime  that  could  not  be  forgiven  in  this  world 
nor  in  the  world  to  come.  The  man  who  lived  in 
the  wilderness  was  one  of  those  unfortunate  indi- 
viduals who  become  pessimistic  and  array  them- 
selves against  society,  and  swear  vengeance  against 
all  men.  He  had  known  humanity  only  from  the 
side  of  selfishness  and  injustice,  and  he  could  not 
understand  that  men  could  act  from  motives  that 
look  to  the  benefit  of  others.  And  our  showing  him 
an  example  of  magnanimity  will  arouse  the  latent 
humane  instinct  that  lies  slumbering  in  every 
breast  and  send  him  forth  with  a  new  resolve  to 
cultivate  unselfishness  and  bestow  benefits  upon 
others.  Society  itself  is  responsible  for  much  of  the 
sordid  selfishness  of  its  individual  units.  Every  day 
we  meet  those  unfortunate  victims  of  injustice  and 
cruelty  who  have  lost  all  faith  in  their  fellow  men 
and  who  have  reverted  to  the  old  law  of  an  eye 
for  an  eye  and  a  tooth  for  a  tooth.  But  when  by 
chance  they  discover  that  there  are  people  in  the 
world  who  can  act  from  high  humanitarian  motives, 
they  have  a  new  birth,  and  begin  to  walk  in  new- 
ness of  life.  If  we  appeal  to  the  God  in  people  it 
will  respond  to  us,  but  if  we  appeal  to  the  baser 

97 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

impulses  of  their  life  we  will  get  response  in  kind." 
So  the  apparent  injustice  of  the  angel  was  justi- 
fied and  the  hermit  perceived  that  his  judgment  was 
based  upon  half  knowledge.  And  so  we  all  sit  in 
judgment  upon  the  decrees  of  Deity  and  try  to 
resolve  with  finite  minds  what  the  Infinite  mind  has 
planned,  and  we  do  not  understand  that  our  out- 
look on  the  case  comprehends  only  one  tangent  while 
the  eye  of  God  takes  in  the  whole  circumference. 

The  chastening  hand  of  sickness  and  adversity 
comes  to  us  for  a  purpose,  though  we  do  not  grasp 
its  meaning. 

"All  nature  is  but  art,  unknown  to  thee ; 
All  chance,  direction  which  thou  canst  not  see; 
All  discord,  harmony  not  understood, 
All  partial   evil,   universal  good." 

The  royal  metal  of  character  is  refined  only  in  the 
crucible  of  affliction.  The  easy,  pleasurable  way  of 
life  is  the  way  that  limits  our  development.  Wealth 
and  ease  and  luxury  are  conspirators  against  the 
soul.  In  the  last  analysis  they  are  most  cruel  things. 
"God  takes  out  of  a  man's  soul  what  he  puts  into 
his  coffers." 

Into  this  lowly  home  we  are  describing  sickness 
and  the  shadowing  of  the  wings  of  the  destroying 

98 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

angel  had  come  for  a  purpose.  But  it  is  hard  for 
us  to  see  and  comprehend  the  meaning  of  it  when 
it  is  the  widow's  son  that  is  stricken.  Much  less 
easy  was  it  for  those  who  depended  on  his  daily  toil 
for  the  necessaries  of  life.  It  seemed  that  God  had 
forsaken  them.  In  vain  they  prayed  for  mercy, 
but  the  relentless  grip  of  the  destroyer  abated  not 
for  a  moment.  Day  by  day  the  suffering  boy  grew 
weaker,  and  the  faith  of  his  kindred  and  friends  grew 
less.  But  the  resolution  of  his  soul  was  undimin- 
ished, and  the  clear  light  of  his  eye  flickered  not  for 
one  instant.  A  smile  of  appreciation  greeted  every 
little  attention  that  was  bestowed  upon  him,  and 
never  a  cross  or  harsh  word  escaped  his  lips,  though 
his  suffering  at  times  was  excruciating.  "I  am 
not  afraid  to  die,"  he  was  heard  to  say,  "but  I  do 
desire  so  much  to  live  for  the  sake  of  my  mother 
and  my  brothers  and  sisters."  Through  all  these 
dreary  hours  of  pain  and  distress  he  was  making 
plans  for  the  future,  and  never  dreaming  of  anything 
but  the  happy  consummation  of  them  in  a  few 
days,  when  this  tide  of  sorrow  should  have  ex- 
pended its  force  and  recede. 

One  glorious  morning  dawned  on  this  home  of 
affliction,  and  for  a  time  their  hopes  went  skyward 
in  the  change  it  seemed  to  bring.     It  was  the  early 

99 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

spring  time.  The  song  of  birds  was  in  the  air, 
the  sweet  perfume  of  flowers  was  carried  by  every 
breeze,  and  the  sun  poured  over  the  eastern  hills 
a  flood  of  golden  light.  And  our  patient  little  Sam- 
uel seemed  to  partake  of  the  spirit  of  the  hour,  and 
his  soul  thrilled  with  the  glory  of  that  morning  carni- 
val. As  the  anxious  group  of  relatives  and  friends 
sat  in  silence  around  the  humble  cot,  his  eye  beamed 
with  a  splendor  unwonted,  and  he  said: 

"This  is  such  a  beautiful  world  we  live  in,  and 
you  people  have  been  so  much  tike  ministering 
angels.  I  cannot  imagine  paradise  in  any  better  set- 
ting than  this.  I  do  so  wish  to  live,  but  if  it's 
Grod's  will  that  I  should  go  hence,  I  have  no  fear. 
My  conscience  is  void  of  offense.  I  shall  only 
regret  the  parting,  which  will  be  but  for  a  time. 
I  do  not  guess,  but  I  know  that  we  shall  meet  again 
upon  that  other  shore.  God  has  removed  all  doubt 
from  my  mind.  The  veil  is  rent,  and  I  can  see 
clearly  the  transformation  from  the  world  of  ma- 
terial things  to  the  world  of  spirit.  The  peace  that 
is  in  my  soul  transcends  all  words.  I  do  not  suffer 
now.  A  spirit  has  come  over  me  that  dispels  all 
fear  and  pain." 

The  morning  hour  passed  away  with  our  young 
friend  in  this  state  of  mind.  He  was  not  sure,  but  he 
100 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

thought  the  hour  of  his  departure  was  near  at  hand. 

Our  mother  Nature  which  seems  to  know  no  pity 
in  her  dealings  with  the  children  of  men  is  yet  more 
merciful  than  we  are  wont  to  believe.  She  sends 
her  well  adjusted  dose  of  carbonic  acid  gas  whirling 
through  our  veins  to  smother  the  pains  of  dissolution 
that  otherwise  would  be  so  terrible.  She  deals  in 
mental  states  that  come  as  the  antidote  of  fear  and 
worry.  She  sends  streamers  of  spiritual  light  as 
emissions  from  beacons  upon  the  golden  shore  to 
guide  our  feet  over  the  dark  river.  Many  times, 
as  physician,  have  I  beheld  this  dawn  of  the  spirit 
in  the  gathering  gloom  of  the  death  chamber.  It  is 
not,  in  my  interpretation,  the  accentuated  twilight 
of  the  passing  day;  it  is  not  the  manifestation  of 
mental  processes  set  in  motion  by  the  poisoning  of 
brain  cells  as  some  have  maintained,  but  it  is  the 
opening  up  of  a  new  mental  condition,  the  outlook 
upon  the  universe  from  the  spiritual  viewpoint. 

I  look  into  the  cold  face  of  science  in  vain  for 
a  parallel  consolation.  To  say  that  this  is  an  ecstatic 
mental  state  resulting  from  irritated  brain  cells  is 
an  easy  way  to  dispose  of  it,  but  when  we  demand 
the  proof  of  such  an  assumption,  science  has  nothing 
to  offer.  The  relationship  of  certain  mental  states 
to    certain    conditions    of    the    brain    and    of    the 

101 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

circulating  blood  has  a  basis  of  plausibility  in  the 
delirium  of  fever,  in  the  dethroned  judgment  of 
alcoholism  and  other  drug  poisonings,  in  the  mental 
hebetude  of  uremia.  But  it  is  pure  presumption 
to  conclude  from  this  that  all  unusual  mental  pro- 
cesses have  a  like  explanation.  This  is  in  the  main  a 
matter  of  conjecture  and  not  a  matter  of  proof. 
Science  as  such  deals  with  the  physical  and  ignores 
completely  the  spiritual.  What  she  can  not  dem- 
onstrate with  microscope,  with  crucible  or  chemical 
reagents,  she  rules  out  of  existence.  But  why,  I 
ask,  should  men  of  the  scientific  outlook  be  so  anx- 
ious to  gainsay  the  spiritual  counterpart  of  this 
physical  existence?  Is  not  the  phenomenon  of  life 
more  easy  of  explanation  with  the  assumption  of  an 
indwelling  spirit?  It  certainly  changes  the  whole 
meaning  of  life  when  we  regard  it  as  a  perpetual 
thing,  and  not  as  an  accidental  combination  of  certain 
elements  and  certain  forces. 

I  have  sat  by  many  a  death  bed  and  watched  the 
ebbing  tide  of  life.  The  vital  processes,  though 
modified  and  retarded,  continue  uninterrupted  until 
a  great  climacteric  act  of  the  respiration  brings  all 
the  life  phenomena  at  once  to  a  dramatic  ending. 
The  demand  for  oxygen,  which  is  so  immanent  and 
constant,  grows  yet  more  pressing  as  the  respiratory 

102 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

center  gives  up  the  struggle,  and  then,  as  if  in  one 
great  effort  to  regain  itself,  the  rhythm  becomes 
lengthened,  all  the  voluntary  and  involuntary  muscles 
are  called  into  action,  and  two  or  three  times  the 
lungs  are  filled  to  their  limit.  Then  suddenly  all 
manifestations  of  life  cease,  and  the  process  of 
disintegration  of  tissue  rapidly  sets  in. 

Now,  I  ask  my  material  friends  what  is  it  that 
has  happened?  Here  is  the  machine  equipped  with 
all  its  wonderful  physiological  apparatus;  the  eye 
with  its  crystalline  lens,  the  heart  with  its  perfect 
hydraulic  construction,  the  muscles  all  connected 
up  by  telegraphic  lines  with  the  conscious  centers 
above,  ready  to  respond  to  the  minutest  bidding  of 
the  will;  the  brain,  that  wonderful  dynamic,  which 
is  ready  to  put  out  not  only  orders  for  physical  ac- 
tion, but  to  generate  poetry,  music,  oratory,  art. 
But  the  power  that  controlled  all  these  activities  has 
abdicated.  Something  has  gone,  which,  but  a  mo- 
ment ago,  gave  forth  its  will,  and  maintained  itself 
an  individual  unit  in  the  great  panorama  of  life. 

As  I  write  these  lines  I  see  from  my  window  an 
electric  car  standing  idle  on  the  track.  It  has 
in  its  make  up  all  the  machinery  of  locomotion,  and 
could  move  through  space  at  a  great  rate  of  speed. 
But  it  stands  motionless.    Presently  I  see  the  trolley 

103 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

released  and  permitted  to  make  contact  with  a  wire 
above.  Then  suddenly  all  the  machinery  that  has 
been  motionless  begins  to  stir,  and  the  vehicle  ful- 
fills the  purpose  of  its  creation  by  carrying  pass- 
engers many  miles  through  the  city. 

And  I  am  persuaded  that  there  is  a  direct  anal- 
ogy between  the  electric  machine  and  the  human 
body.  These  wonderfully  organized  cells  are  po- 
tentialities, but  not  physiological  factors,  unless 
some  extraneous  force  takes  hold  of  them,  and  that 
extraneous  force  manifests  volition,  intelligence, 
emotion. 

The  harp  has  all  the  elements  in  its  construction 
for  the  production  of  harmonious  musical  combina- 
tions of  sound.  But  if  there  be  not  a  harpist  to 
play  upon  it,  it  will  be  silent  forever.  Of  its  own 
accord  it  cannot  produce  music.  But  when  the  skilled 
finger  of  a  musician  sweeps  over  its  strings,  they 
vibrate  with  melody  and  harmony  sublime. 

They  who  have  said  that  the  brain  cells  secrete 
thought  as  the  liver  cells  secrete  bile  have  not  given 
serious  consideration  to  the  indwelling  intelligent 
force  that  directs  mental  activity,  and  that  manifests 
itself  most  certainly  when  it  makes  its  tragic  exit. 

Biochemistry,  I  admit,  is  a  vital  physiological 
factor,  and  is  indispensable  to  the  life  of  each  in- 

104 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

dividual  cell  as  it  is  the  aggregate  of  cells  that  go 
to  make  up  the  body.  But  biochemistry  is  only  an 
abstract  thing  if  there  be  not  the  indwelling  life 
principle  to  direct  and  appropriate  its  occult  pro- 
cesses. And  this  life  principle,  call  it  spirit  or  what 
you  will,  is  the  extraneous  thing  that  comes  into 
the  human  machine  and  starts  its  functions  and 
directs  its  processes  to  a  purposeful  end.  Biochem- 
istry is  an  indispensable  part  of  the  life  process, 
but  it  is  not  life  itself,  any  more  than  is  the  oxida- 
tion of  tissues,  the  assimilaton  of  food,  or  any 
other  chemical  or  physiological  process.  He  who 
ignores  the  spiritual  corollary  to  this  physical  or- 
ganism is  driven  to  a  lamentable  pass  to  explain 
things  that  are  very  simple  to  the  mind  that  admits 
the  indwelling  spirit.  The  materialist  is  a  credulous 
individual.  He  is  fanatical  to  a  theory,  and  will 
hold  himself  to  many  absurdities  to  brace  up  his 
preconceived  idea  of  things.  When  we  come  down 
to  the  last  analysis  of  things  there  is  no  difference 
between  the  man  of  fanatical  preconceived  ideas 
of  science,  with  a  determination  to  bend  everything 
to  fit  in  with  his  theory  and  the  man  of  fanatical 
religious  views  who  is  willing  to  go  to  the  same 
extremity  to  maintain  his  position.  The  fact  that 
one  labels  his  fanaticism  "science"  and  the  other 

105 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

"religion"  makes  no  difference  in  actual  principle. 
These  two  kinds  of  men  are  of  the  same  breed.  The 
great  defect  in  their  lives  is  their  unwillingness  to 
follow  the  truth.  They  are  the  men  who  have 
retarded  the  progress  of  the  world  in  all  ages  by 
their  intolerance.  They  are  the  men  who  have 
made  thumbscrews  in  the  days  of  intellectual  thrall- 
dom  and  lighted  fares  to  burn  heretics. 

The  passing  of  one  so  near  to  the  heart  of  the 
village  was  naturally  an  event  of  greatest  concern 
to  every  one.  Eager  faces  were  watching  for  every 
token,  and  interrogating  every  neighbor  about  the 
events  of  the  sick  room.  The  whole  village  was 
keyed  up  to  the  highest  pitch  of  expectancy,  and 
moved  with  a  common  impulse  of  solicitude. 

The  long  slanting  shadows  of  the  evening  were 
falling  eastward,  and  the  rays  of  the  departing 
sun  were  streaming  through  the  windows  of  that 
room  of  affliction,  when  a  sudden  change  came  over 
the  countenance  of  the  dying  boy.  He  had  been 
dull  and  apathetic  for  some  considerable  time.  Na- 
ture was  instilling  into  his  blood  her  accumulating 
doses  of  carbonic  acid  and  gas  to  benumb  the 
sensitive  nerves  and  quiet  the  fears  of  dissolution. 
But  consciousness,  which  had  ebbed  and  flowed,  but 
which  was  now  far  out  to  sea,  seemed  to  return  with 

106 


GREATER    SATISFACTION 

a  sudden  surge  and  his  face  lighted  up  with  a  glory 
sublime.  It  was  the  last  full  flow  of  the  tide  of  life 
before  its  final  recession,  and  in  its  effulgence  every 
faculty  seemed  to  be  keyed  up  to  its  highest  tension. 
There  was  majesty  in  that  countenance  as  he  sur- 
veyed the  group  of  kindred  and  friends  around  him, 
and  beckoned  for  each  in  turn  to  come  and  grasp 
his  hand. 

"I  know  that  I  must  go,"  he  said  in  tones  of  sad- 
ness. "I  know  that  I  must  sleep  in  the  grave,  but  we 
shall  meet  again  sometime,  somewhere.  Goodbye. 
God  bless  you  all.  I  am  completely  happy.  I  move 
out  of  the  dark  valley  into  the  light,  and  my  pathway 
is  clear  before  me." 

A  fixity  came  over  his  countenance,  and  the  glory 
of  that  passing  moment  wrought  itself  into  his 
physical  being,  and  the  majesty  of  life  became  the 
majesty  of  death. 

I  am  free  to  admit  that  these  spiritual  premoni- 
tions are  not  the  customary  thing  when  people  come 
to  the  last  great  struggle.  Most  of  us  will  fall 
asleep  only  when  our  strength  is  all  exhausted  in 
the  fight  for  life,  and  have  no  idea  that  the  hour 
of  our  departure  has  arrived.  Comparatively  few 
people  know  that  they  are  really  dying,  when  the 
outgoing  tide  lifts  them  over  the  bar.     Some  aged 

107 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

people  I  have  known  who  were  really  weary  of  the 
struggle  and  glad  to  get  out  of  it;  and  some  un- 
fortunates who  had  suffered  so  long  that  they  wel- 
comed anything  that  would  eliminate  the  pain  from 
their  sensitive  nerves.  But  the  average  man  fights  to 
the  last  ditch,  and  never  surrenders. 

Once  in  a  while,  particularly  in  precocious  youth, 
we  meet  with  that  spiritual  temperament  which 
seems  to  have  prescience  of  the  world  that  is  to 
come,  and  which  plunges  into  the  great  mystery  with 
all  the  confidence  that  perfect  knowledge  of  its 
meaning  could  give.  Some  might  explain  this  as 
a  simple  psychological  condition,  which  it  really 
is,  but  to  my  mind  it  is  not  born  of  engendered 
poisons  from  within,  but  of  the  great  all  compre- 
hending spirit  from  without,  which  sees  things  in 
their  true  relationship  and  manifests  its  perfect 
knowledge  through  these  sensitive  instruments. 
These  transparent  souls  are  en  rapport  with  those 
finer  spiritual  emanations  to  which  the  ordinary 
individual  is  quite  unresponsive.  And  now  we  will 
let  the  curtain  fall  upon  the  sad  ending  of  this  beau- 
tiful life,  and  leave  him,  we  hope,  to  rest  in  peace, 
and  to  live  in  the  memory  of  all  who  knew  him  and 
appreciated  his  worth  and  gained  admonition  from 
his  poetic  ending. 

108 


CHAPTER  VII 

A    STONE    WHICH    THE   BUILDERS    REJECTED 

THE  Special  venire  knows  no  limitation  in  the 
space  it  embraces.  I  go  far  afield  and  sum- 
mon now  a  witness  who  has  drifted  far  away  from 
the  old  mooring.  For  convenience  we  will  call  him 
Richard,  and  we  shall  ask  him  to  take  the  stand,  and 
give  forth  the  evidence  he  has  in  his  possession.  We 
shall  swear  him  in  to  tell  the  truth,  the  whole  truth, 
and  nothing  but  the  truth. 

The  family  circle  to  which  Richard  belonged  was 
one  of  those  rolling  circles  which  moves  from  place 
to  place  and  sees  opportunity  only  in  the  distance. 
His  father  belonged  to  a  type  of  men  we  are  all  fa- 
miliar with,  who  see  their  chances  of  success  always 
in  some  other  locality  than  that  which  they  now  oc- 
cupy. They  are  often  like  the  dog  which  dropped  its 
piece  of  meat  to  grab  at  the  shadow.  They  enter  with 
much  enthusiasm  into  each  new  venture  as  though  it 
were  the  one  opportunity  of  their  life,  but  the  mo- 
mentum soon  begins  to  slacken,  and  presently  comes 
to  a  standstill. 

So  much  effort  is  expended  to  no  purpose  by  fail- 
109 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

ing  to  follow  up  the  advantage  it  brings  that  they 
always  fall  short  of  success.  Next  thing  to  work, 
the  most  important  of  all  factors  in  the  life  of  men 
who  succeed,  is  pertinacity.  You  have  to  put  your- 
self down  like  an  axis  of  the  earth  and  stick,  if  you 
ever  intend  to  accomplish  anything.  The  fitful  man 
is  as  incompetent  as  the  lazy  man.  Intermittent 
effort  accomplishes  little  more  than  no  effort  at  all. 

After  many  ventures  in  various  localities  this 
family  did  finally  settle  down  to  something  like  per- 
manence in  one  of  the  larger  towns  of  their  native 
state.  They  acquired  some  land  holdings  and  built 
a  home  in  an  outlying  part  of  the  town.  The  older 
members  of  the  family  found  occasional  employment 
in  the  various  activities  of  the  community,  and  other- 
wise assisted  the  father  in  tilling  the  little  plat  of 
ground  they  had  purchased.  Some  degree  of  com- 
fort and  respectability  seemed  finally  to  have  fallen 
to  their  lot. 

Our  friend  Richard  was  one  of  the  younger  mem- 
bers of  the  family.  He  attended  the  public  school, 
and  was  known  as  a  good  student,  though  there  was 
no  indication  at  that  time  of  anything  out  of  the  or- 
dinary in  his  mental  make-up. 

There  was  a  little  girl  of  the  town  whom  for  con- 
venience we  shall  call  Mary  as  we  detail  some  of  her 
110 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

life's  experiences.  She  was  the  friend  and  boon 
companion  of  Richard.  As  children  they  played  to- 
gether, as  students  they  worked  together,  and  in  all 
the  social  activities  of  the  junior  element  of  the  com- 
munity they  seemed  to  gravitate  toward  each  other. 
As  they  grew  into  their  'teens,  and  began  to  feel  the 
hidden  motion  of  the  soul  which  stirs  within  every 
manly  and  womanly  breast  with  the  transition  from 
childhood  into  adolescence,  the  attachment  grew 
stronger.  No  word  had  been  spoken.  Indeed,  they 
seemed  to  take  each  other  for  granted.  No  avowal 
could  add  to  the  compact  which  nature  had  arranged 
between  them.  From  the  first  they  seemed  to  un- 
derstand each  other  perfectly. 

Richard  had  grown  in  favor  among  the  people  of 
the  town.  He  manifested  a  degree  of  intellect  and 
a  magnanimity  of  soul  which  were  quite  unusual 
among  the  boys  of  his  age  and  station.  His  elder 
brothers,  and  even  the  father,  began  to  be  jealous 
of  the  prestige  he  had  attained.  The  halo  which 
gathered  around  his  life  seemed  to  them  to  be  a  re- 
flection upon  the  dim  background  of  the  family  set- 
ting. 

Woe  be  to  the  one  who  ever  dares  to  raise  his 
head  above  the  common  level  of  his  fellows.  The 
greatest  of  all  the  offenses  we  can  commit  against 

111 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

our  associates  is  to  outstrip  them  in  the  struggle 
for  preferment.  All  other  offenses  may  be  forgiven, 
but  this  is  the  sin  unpardonable. 

Richard  was  employed  in  a  large  mercantile  estab- 
lishment of  the  town.  His  employers  placed  every 
confidence  in  him,  and  made  him  the  custodian  of 
their  safe  with  all  its  contained  treasure.  He  was 
rapidly  becoming  the  dominant  factor  of  the  firm, 
although  he  was  still  only  in  his  'teens.  His  was 
indeed  a  career  of  much  promise  for  the  future, 
judged  by  all  external  and  internal  conditions. 

How  little  we  know  of  the  mischances  that  lurk  in 
the  way  of  budding,  developing  careers,  in  a  mo- 
ment's time  reversing  the  whole  course  of  events 
and  bringing  discredit  to  the  one  who  seemed  worthy 
of  all  confidence. 

One  morning  when  the  safe  was  opened  it  was 
found  that  a  considerable  sum  of  money  was  missing. 
Suspicion  knows  but  little  discrimination  of  proba- 
bilities or  possibilities  when  it  is  directed  against  one 
who  has  excited  envy  among  his  fellows.  When 
people  wish  the  thing  to  be  true  which  they  suspect, 
everything  is  colored  to  fit  in  with  their  explanation. 

And  indeed  the  facts  did  seem  to  point  toward  our 
friend  Richard  as  the  one  w'ho  must  know  something 
about  the  theft,  for  he  was  sole  custodian  of  the 
112 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

combination  of  the  safe.  But  he  stoutly  protested 
his  innocence,  although  he  had  no  explanation  to 
make. 

And  now  developed  one  of  those  crises  in  the  life 
of  this  boy  which  sometimes  in  a  greater  or  less 
degree  must  come  to  every  individual.  To  see  our 
friends  aligning  themselves  either  for  or  against  us 
in  the  face  of  some  great  dramatic  episode  in  our 
affairs;  to  see  those  whose  fidelity  we  have  banked 
upon  jumping  headlong  at  the  conclusion  that  we 
have  gone  wrong,  and  that  it  is  their  duty  to  draw 
the  deadline  of  social  ostracism  against  us, — these 
are  the  experiences  which  reveal  to  us  the  appalling 
instablity  of  human  character.  Not  infrequently 
the  people  who  take  the  most  pronounced  stand 
against  us  are  the  very  ones  who  have  most  willingly 
accepted  favors  at  our  hands.  They  have  eaten  of 
the  substance  we  bestowed  and  then  turned  to 
rend  us. 

Our  Richard  found  himself  facing  a  grave  situa- 
tion. He  was  placed  under  arrest  and  put  through 
the  terrible  ordeal  of  an  investigation  of  his  sup- 
posed guilt.  The  friends  of  former  days,  every  one, 
deserted  without  giving  him  the  benefit  of  a  doubt. 
His  father  and  his  brothers  were  among  the  first  to 
denounce  him.     Even  the  little  Mary  was  carried 

113 


AFTER   TWENTY    YEARS 

away  in  the  popular  clamor  and  listed  herself  with 
those  who  were  against  him.  In  all  the  community 
there  was  only  one  voice  raised  in  his  defense,  and 
that  was  the  voice  of  his  mother. 

Among  the  most  beautiful  of  all  human  relation- 
ships is  that  between  mother  and  son.  All  other 
bonds  are  variable  and  liable  at  any  time  to  be  sun- 
dered, but  the  loyalty  of  a  mother's  heart  is  the  one 
constant,  undeviating  thing  in  human  character.  It 
knows  no  limitation  by  prosperity  or  adversity.  The 
blighting  spell  of  misfortune  has  no  power  over  it. 
It  follows  afar  off  to  the  prison  wall,  to  the  gallows, 
to  the  place  of  crucifixion,  and  blots  out  the  offense 
which  preceded  them  by  the  multitude  of  its  com- 
passionate tears.  The  mother's  devotion  is  meas- 
ured in  terms  of  necessity  and  expands  itself  to  the 
full  requirement  of  those  who  have  a  valid  claim  to  it. 

Apart  from  the  fact  that  Richard  was  custodian 
of  the  key  to  the  safe,  there  was  nothing  to  indicate 
that  he  was  the  culprit.  The  investigation  produced 
no  evidence  to  warrant  legal  proceedings,  and  so  he 
was  acquitted.  But  the  community  had  constituted 
itself  a  jury,  and  adjudged  him  guilty  without  a 
hearing.  What  was  he  to  do,  what  could  he  do 
under  the  circumstances?  He  knew  that  he  was  in- 
nocent of  the  charge,  but  to  convince  people  whose 
114 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

minds  are  inflamed  with  prejudice  is  a  hopeless  task. 
If  he  were  to  flee,  his  enemies  would  use  that  as  a 
convincing  proof  of  his  guilt ;  if  he  were  to  remain, 
all  doors  would  be  closed  against  him ;  and  the  vin- 
dication which  comes  by  honest  effort  would  be  for- 
ever denied  him.  Besides,  he  would  be  ostracized 
and  obliged  to  walk  the  streets  of  the  town,  where 
all  his  kindred  and  former  friends  resided,  in  humilia- 
tion and  disgrace.  The  consciousness  of  his  own 
innocence  was  a  great  aid  to  him  in  the  decision.  A 
soul  unsullied  is  bold  to  assert  its  inalienable  rights 
in  the  face  of  all  kinds  of  aspersion.  It  is  only  the 
guilty  coward  who  cringes  before  the  clamorous 
multitude.  And  so  Richard  reached  his  conclusion 
by  that  intuition  which  is  born  of  the  fearlessness 
of  honesty.  He  went  to  the  officers  and  told  them 
where  he  could  be  found  if  any  question  arose  re- 
quiring his  presence.  In  another  more  friendly 
clime  he  would  work  out  his  destiny,  and  when  he 
was  vindicated  he  would  come  back  to  show  them 
how  they  had  misjudged  him,  and  how  cruel  their 
verdict  had  been  which  robbed  him  of  his  honor,  the 
most  priceless  asset  of  any  human  soul. 

With  one  fond  caress  for  the  little  mother  who 
had  stood  so  nobly  by  him,  he  went  forth  into  the 
world  to  fight  his  battles  alone. 

115 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

He  knew  not  what  his  vocation  was  to  be,  but  he 
had  one  big,  dominating  thought  which  impelled  him 
onward  day  by  day,  and  that  was  that  he  must  make 
good,  and  come  back  to  victory  where  he  had  met 
with  apparent  defeat. 

If  we  could  analyze  the  lives  of  men  who  have 
made  a  big  success  of  their  calling,  we  would  find 
that  nearly  always  there  is  some  great  impelling 
motive  back  of  them.  Most  often  it  is  a  love  affair. 
In  the  great  masterpieces  of  Raphael  there  is  one 
countenance  which  always  appears.  Fornarina,  the 
lover,  wrought  herself  into  the  fabric  of  his  dreams. 
In  literature,  the  same  unmistakable  portraiture  re- 
veals the  hidden  spring  which  has  impelled  onward 
to  the  highest  attainment  authors  who  might  other- 
wise have  been  unknown.  The  "Inferno"  without 
Beatrice  as  a  redeeming  angel,  would  perhaps  never 
have  been  produced.  It  is  the  dream  children  of 
our  emotions  and  not  of  our  imagination  which  at- 
tract the  attention  of  the  world.  The  story  which 
is  written  in  the  life  blood  of  the  author  is  the  one 
that  will  live. 

The  man  who  goes  forth  from  the  land  of  his 
nativity  with  the  burning  remembrance  of  unkind- 
ness  heaped  upon  him  by  those  who  ought  to  have 
been  his  friends,  has  perhaps  the  greatest  motive  of 

116 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

all  to  make  good.  I  have  no  patience  with  the  man 
who  absents  himself  for  years  from  his  native  town 
and  then  comes  sneaking  in  through  the  back  streets 
in  the  garb  of  a  tramp.  Unless  I  could  come  in  with 
the  dignity  and  honor  of  a  respectable  citizen  I 
would  remain  away  forever. 

In  a  city  far  away  Richard  took  up  his  abode  and 
began  life  anew  with  one  great  resolve  forever  pres- 
ent in  his  mind. 

'  One  burning  desire  which  dominated  all  other 
things  and  incorporated  itself  into  the  fabric  of  the 
air  castles  he  was  wont  to  build.  He  would  fight  for 
success,  but  not  the  success  which  satisfies  the  or- 
dinary individual.  God  helping  him,  he  would  aim 
at  nothing  short  of  a  career  which  would  distinguish 
him  from  all  his  fellows. 

If  we  start  out  with  sufficient  determination  we 
can  be  almost  anything  we  wish  to  be.  The  trouble 
with  most  people  is  that  they  have  not  got  the 
courage  to  follow  up  their  desires.  They  have 
wish-bone  but  not  back-bone.  Before  the  indomit- 
able will  of  man  all  things  must  bend  if  the  resolu- 
tion to  make  them  bend  is  continuous.  God  is  always 
on  the  side  of  the  man  who  believes  in  himself. 

Whether  by  accident  or  design  I  know  not,  but 
Richard  gravitated  to  an  institution  which  made  art 

117 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

work  its  specialty.  There  does  seem  to  be  an  im- 
pelling force  back  of  the  real  student  which  acts  like 
the  magnetism  of  the  mariner's  needle,  and  draws 
him  ever  toward  the  centers  of  learning.  I  never  yet 
saw  a  young  man  or  a  young  woman  whose  soul 
hungered  and  thirsted  for  knowledge,  but  in  some 
mysterious  manner  the  way  opened  up  before  them, 
and  they  were  permitted  to  gratify  their  desires. 
Providence  seems  to  have  a  really  watchful  care  over 
this  class  of  people,  moulding  every  circumstance  to 
fit  in  with  their  impelling  inclination. 

Richard  matriculated  in  the  regular  course  and 
had  the  privilege  of  doing  janitor's  service  to  meet 
his  expenses.  This  imposed  upon  him  a  handicap 
which  made  necessary  a  great  amount  of  energy  to 
hold  his  balance  with  the  young  men  and  young 
women  who  entered  without  condition.  But  he  was 
a  lover  of  all  things  intellectual,  and  he  soon  took 
his  position  as  one  of  the  leaders  of  his  class.  The 
sons  and  daughters  of  wealthy  parents  who  came  to 
gratify  the  family  ambition  and  had  no  real  desire 
to  do  the  thing- that  was  required  of  them,  were  soon 
out-distanced  by  this  unfortunate  boy  who  found 
in  intellectual  pursuits  his  native  element  and  took 
to  the  college  as  the  duckling  takes  to  the  stream. 

I  believe  in  an  aristocracy  of  brains.  Your  social 
118 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

classification  which  places  in  the  highest  scale  people 
possessed  of  money,  often  dishonestly  acquired  or 
accidentally  inherited,  is  absurd  and  ridiculous.  The 
only  real  wealth  in  this  world  of  ours  is  the  wealth 
of  the  soul,  and  the  only  real  aristocrat  is  the  one 
who  has  intellect  and  character. 

Richard  did  not  shine  in  the  smart  set  who  found 
opportunity  through  the  sororities  to  indulge  in 
much  social  pastime. 

I  fear  these  social  excrescences  which  have  grown 
up  like  a  fungus  growth  in  our  colleges  are  getting 
us  away  from  the  real  issues  involved  in  college 
education.  I  believe  they  are  consuming  time  which 
could  be  devoted  with  profit  to  the  really  serious 
work  which  the  college  should  require.  I  believe,  too, 
that  they  are  breeding  mollycoddles  of  men  and  wo- 
men who  are  trying  to  substitute  tinsel  for  the  royal 
metal  of  education.  I  am  willing  to  forego  all  the 
social  advantage  they  give  in  the  interest  of  sound  in- 
tellectual work.  Let  a  man  be  the  master  of  his  pro- 
fession, and  do  something  worth  while,  and  I  will 
risk  his  social  development.  The  world  will  teach 
him  social  forms  by  the  homage  it  comes  to  pay  to 
his  genius,  and  he  will  not  lack  the  refinement  which 
society  expects  from  the  man  of  a  degree. 

Our  Richard  wore  seedy  clothes  because  he  could 
119 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

aiTord  no  better.  He  dined  on  humble  fare  and  lived 
a  secluded  life,  because  his  meager  income  demanded 
the  greatest  economy.  But  in  the  seclusion  of  his 
room,  in  the  silent  midnight  hours,  he  was  filled  and 
thrilled  with  thoughts  and  emotions  which  can  be 
comprehended  only  by  those  who  have  the  genuine 
instinct  of  a  student.  In  the  dull  modelers'  clay  he 
saw  classic  profiles  rising  by  the  magic  of  his  touch ; 
in  the  rough  marble  boulders  from  the  quarry  he 
saw  sleeping  angels  which  needed  but  the  aid  of  his 
chisel  and  mallet  to  set  them  free. 

For  Richard  was  a  genius.  He  had  found  through 
the  very  buffetings  of  fate  an  outlet  for  the  pent-up 
energy  of  his  soul. 

He  loved  his  work  so  much  that  such  incidental 
things  as  food  and  sleep  were  indulged  in  grudg- 
ingly only  as  nature  asserted  herself  and  made  de- 
mand for  them.  The  moments  of  his  life  were  as 
precious  to  him  as  the  coins  in  the  miser's  purse,  and 
they  were  counted  out  with  the  same  precision. 

And  this  is  the  really  superlative  degree  of  life,  to 
find  the  thing  by  accident  or  design  which  nature 
intended  you  to  do,  and  then  to  throw  all  the  energy 
of  your  soul  into  the  execution  of  it.  Your  easy- 
going son  of  wealthy  parentage  imagines  he  has 
found  happiness  in  the  social  functions  of  the  soror- 
120 


THE   REJECTED   STONE 

ity  and  the  club,  and  does  not  comprehend  that  the 
real  nectar  of  life  is  not  to  be  purchased  by  money 
nor  acquired  by  social  preferment.  Let  the  son  of 
wealth  play  with  his  baubles,  then,  while  the  son  of 
toil  drudges  and  works.  One  day  the  process  will 
be  reversed,  and  the  stone  which  was  rejected  will 
become  the  head  of  the  comer.  God  has  placed  His 
angel  with  the  flaming  sword  before  the  temple  of 
learning  and  decreed  that  none  shall  enter  there 
without  giving  the  password  of  absolution  from  the 
frivolous  things  of  the  world. 

Some  people  have  said  that  a  genius  is  always  an 
abnormal  person,  that  his  peculiar  bent  is  a  form  of 
mental  aberration,  that  he  lacks  in  all  other  depart- 
ments of  his  mentality  except  in  the  one  which 
manifests  his  peculiar  power.  In  a  future  chapter 
of  this  book  there  is  to  be  a  discussion  of  the  rela- 
tionship of  the  human  machine  to  the  great  all- 
pervading  source  of  intelligence.  The  genius  is  the 
one  who  has  the  power  by  instinct  to  develop  one 
particular  part  of  his  mental  machinery  to  its  highest 
possible  capacity.  In  one  direction  he  is  almost 
omniscient.  He  seems  to  be  born  with  the  instinct 
to  do  a  certain  thing,  as  the  duckling  has  the  instinct 
to  swim  in  the  water.  He  speaks  as  one  with  au- 
thority. 

121 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

Considering  the  legacy  which  he  leaves  to  the 
world,  we  can  pardon  his  eccentricities,  and  his  lack 
of  knowledge  of  practical  things,  and  give  him  lee- 
way to  develop  his  mental  specialty  to  its  highest 
possible  degree.  He  is  abnormal  in  the  right  direc- 
tion. We  live  in  an  age  of  specialists.  Life  is  too 
short  for  technical  study  of  many  things.  If  we 
would  acquire  that  degree  of  efficiency  which  attracts 
attention  we  must  concentrate  our  mental  energy 
into  a  small  space. 

The  genius  is  not  so  unmindful  of  the  general 
obligations  of  his  life  as  we  are  wont  to  imagine. 
He  may  be  seclusive ;  he  may  be  overshadowed  by 
one  impelling  thought ;  he  may  forget  sometimes  the 
little  social  obligations  in  his  pondering  of  weightier 
things.  But  he  is  intensely,  divinely  human.  His 
emotions  are  developed  to  the  superlative  degree. 
Of  his  kindred  and  friends  he  is  enthusiastic. 

So  far  from  manifesting  any  form  of  insanity,  as 
some  have  imagined,  he  attacks  the  problems  of  life 
in  the  only  sane  way,  by  specializing  on  one  thing 
and  bringing  all  the  power  of  his  mentality  to  a 
focus  upon  that.  Of  course,  it  would  not  do  to  have 
a  world  made  up  of  geniuses.  The  picture  must 
have  its  background,  the  jewel  must  have  its  setting, 
the  gold  must  have  its  alloy.     And  so  society  has 

122 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

adjusted  itself  so  that  its  purest  mind-metal  shall 
be  tempered  in  the  right  proportion  with  material 
less  perishable,  if  of  less  intrinsic  value,  that  the 
aggregate  may  be  a  combination  of  stability.  The 
alloy  itself  may  have  intrinsic  value  approximating 
the  royal  metal,  and  pass  current  as  a  very  good 
substitute  for  it  in  times  of  scarcity,  lacking  only  in 
the  extreme  lustre  which  distinguishes  the  approx- 
imate from  the  absolute.  The  man  of  talent  de- 
velops mental  power  by  dint  of  hard  effort,  while 
the  man  of  genius  is  born  with  a  great  measure  of 
it  already  developed,  and  gives  it  forth  by  intuition. 
The  man  of  talent  is  content  to  work  the  fallow  soil 
of  fields  already  surveyed,  while  the  man  of  genius 
sails  boldly  away  from  the  old  boundary  lines,  and 
seeks  virgin  continents  with  unknown  possibilities. 
The  man  of  talent  revolves  in  an  elliptical  orbit 
which  can  be  computed  with  mathematical  certainty, 
while  the  man  of  genius  goes  off  on  a  hyperbolic 
curve,  the  direction  of  which  no  man  has  computed. 
The  members  of  the  faculty  were  not  slow  to  dis- 
cover the  splendid  work  which  was  accomplished  by 
this  unpretending  boy,  nor  the  latent  possibilities 
which  were  held  in  reserve  in  his  peculiar  mentality. 
Opportunities  were  placed  in  his  way  to  ease  the 
struggle  for  existence  which  had  borne  in  so  un- 

123 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

mercifully  upon  his  valuable  time  at  the  beginning, 
and  he  was  enabled  to  make  an  appearance  which 
he  was  not  ashamed  of.  He  gathered  momentum 
with  the  fleeting  months,  and  when  the  day  of  grad- 
uation came  he  was  rated  not  only  as  the  leader  of 
his  class,  but  as  one  of  the  brightest  intellects  which 
had  figured  in  the  annals  of  that  institution  for  many 
years.  A  scholarship  was  awarded  him  without 
much  question  as  to  competitors,  which,  with  the  aid 
of  a  wealthy  art  patron,  who  had  become  interested 
in  his  promising  career,  enabled  him  to  go  abroad, 
and  pursue  his  studies  in  Paris.  At  this  mecca  of 
American  students  he  soon  gained  favor,  and  the 
boldness  and  originality  of  his  ideas,  as  expressed 
in  modelling  clay  and  marble,  attracted  much  atten- 
tion. He  came  home  loaded  with  honors  to  receive 
the  congratulations  of  his  former  faculty  and  to 
take  up  his  abode  in  the  environs  of  the  college  which 
had  given  him  his  start.  His  fame  soon  spread  far 
and  wide,  and  his  studio  became  the  center  of  a 
wealthy  patronage  which  poured  its  treasure  into 
his  coffers,  and  swelled  his  bank  deposit  beyond  his 
fondest  dreams. 

So  much  success  would  have  unbalanced  the  men- 
tality of  the  average  youth,  but  Richard  was  a  prince 
by  nature,  and  nothing  could  disturb  the  equanimity 

124 


THE   REJECTED   STONE 

of  a  mind  which  dwelt  in  the  lofty  heights  above  the 
ordinary  human  frailties.  He  remained  as  simple 
as  a  child  in  the  midst  of  adulation  which  would 
have  been  overwhelming  to  most  persons.  And 
this  is  the  test  of  a  really  great  soul.  The  man  who 
maintains  the  simplicity  of  his  life,  and  greets  all  his 
friends  with  the  same  cordiality  after  he  has  received 
the  homage  of  the  world,  and  established  himself  on 
a  financial  basis  among  the  opulent,  is  the  man  who 
can  lay  claim  to  greatness. 

But  too  often  we  see  the  reverse  of  this.  The  boy 
who  goes  away  and  gets  the  polish  of  high  school 
or  college,  comes  back  to  disdain  the  poor  old  father 
and  mother  who  have  sacrificed  everything  to  make 
possible  his  education;  and  the  friends  of  bygone 
years,  who  are  still  living  the  simple  life  he  was 
born  and  bred  in  are  looked  upon  as  boors  unworthy 
of  his  attention.  The  meanness  of  such  a  method 
never  seems  to  dawn  upon  the  mind  of  the  one  who 
is  really  guilty  of  it. 

In  the  midst  of  all  his  prosperity  there  was  one 
thought  which  dominated  the  mind  of  our  young 
friend.  He  had  been  disavowed  by  his  kindred  and 
the  associates  of  the  bygone  years.  He  would  go 
back  to  them,  and  show  them  how  they  had  mis- 
judged him.     He  would  not  be  revengeful  nor  un- 

125 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

kind,  he  was  too  big  a  man  to  entertain  any  motive 
of  that  kind.  He  would  go  with  the  spirit  of  love 
and  forgiveness  in  his  heart  to  grasp  them  by  the 
hand  and  return  good  for  evil. 

In  the  score  of  years  which  had  sped  away  since 
his  exile  many  changes  had  come  to  the  community 
whence  he  came.  The  relentless  hand  of  time  knows 
neither  fear  nor  favor  in  its  dealings  with  communi- 
ties. Human  hearts  are  but  a  commodity  to  be 
handled  by  it  with  indifference.  Tears  and  plead- 
ings are  of  no  avail.  The  mundane  machine  grinds 
all  things  to  powder,  regardless  of  intrinsic  value. 
Sham  and  pretense,  pride  and  folly,  wealth  and 
poverty,  the  just  and  the  unjust  must  all  go  through 
the  mill  and  receive  the  same  treatment.  Character 
is  the  only  thing  which  it  will  not  and  can  not  grind. 
And  the  most  interesting  thing  in  life  is  to  look  back 
at  the  sweep  of  the  years,  and  recapitulate  the  drama 
which  we  saw  at  its  beginning,  to  turn  the  kaleido- 
scope round  by  decades  and  see  the  new  adjustment. 

And  this  was  the  thought  which  came  to  Richard 
as  he  wandered  back  to  the  old  home.  His  brothers 
had  proved  to  be  incompetent  men  when  they  met 
with  the  stern  realities  of  life.  The  old  farm  and 
the  roof  which  had  sheltered  him  were  under  mort- 
gage, and  the  bank  which  held  the  note  was  pressing 

126 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

for  a  settlement.  His  aged  parents  were  driven  to 
desperation.  Their  piteous  pleadings  were  all  to  no 
purpose,  for  banking  houses  are  of  necessity  deaf  to 
all  appeals  for  mercy.  Theirs  is  the  cold  blooded 
letter  of  the  law.  They  never  temper  justice  with 
mercy.  They  act  out  the  old  dictum  of  the  Scripture, 
"An  eye  for  an  eye  and  a  tooth  for  a  tooth."  They 
demand  the  uttermost  farthing,  though  hearts  may 
break  and  lives  be  wrecked  in  the  rendering  of  it. 
And  yet  they  are  a  necessary  part  of  our  social  and 
financial  system,  and  we  could  not  get  along  without 
them. 

Just  as  the  affairs  of  this  family  had  reached  their 
climax  of  misfortune  and  the  order  was  momentarily 
expected  which  would  turn  them  all  out  as  vaga- 
bonds in  the  street,  Richard,  the  long  lost  Richard, 
came  unannounced  and  unexpected,  as  though  Provi- 
dence had  sent  him  to  be  the  deliverer  of  his  people. 
They  were  filled  with  amazement  at  the  sight  of  him 
and  stood  in  fear  of  his  august  presence.  But  his 
kindly,  benevolent  bearing  soon  inspired  confidence, 
and  put  them  at  ease.  The  amount  of  the  mortgage 
was  but  an  insignificant  thing  to  him,  whose  reserve 
under  judicious  management  had  grown  to  large 
proportions.  He  discharged  the  obligation  with  as 
much  unconcern  as  a  contractor  pays  off  one  of  his 

127 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

laborers  on  Saturday  night,  and  handed  them  their 
reprieve  with  the  air  of  a  princely  giver.  He 
thanked  God  that  the  hour  had  come  when  he  could 
return  good  for  evil. 

The  father  and  the  brothers  who  had  been  so  loud 
in  their  denunciation,  were  glad  now  to  receive  ben- 
efits from  the  one  whom  they  had  driven  away  in 
dishonor,  and  who  bestowed  them  with  a  magnanim- 
ity that  bore  no  indication  of  the  emotions  which 
were  playing  within  his  heart.  For  the  hour  when 
we  can  render  service  to  those  who  have  treated  us 
unkindly  is  the  hour  of  our  greatest  victory.  The 
poor  old  mother  whose  loyalty  had  never  been 
shaken  looked  upon  her  honored  son  with  that  pride 
and  satisfaction  which  only  one  who  is  kindred  in 
thought  and  emotion  can  feel.  To  her  it  was  the 
hour  of  the  greatest  satisfaction  of  her  life. 

Poor  little  Mary  had  become  very  insignificant  in 
the  affairs  of  the  community.  Long  before  this  she 
had  laid  by  the  tinsel  and  the  fine  gowns  which  added 
to  the  attractiveness  of  her  young  womanhood,  and 
allowed  herself  to  become  seedy  and  disheveled  and 
insipid.  She  had  gone  entirely  out  of  the  public 
thought,  and  her  name  would  never  have  been  linked 
with  that  of  Richard  save  for  the  memories  of  their 
early  infatuation. 

128 


THE  REJECTED   STONE 

She  had  married  at  an  early  date  a  young  man  of 
the  town,  who  was  reputed  to  be  handsome  but  who 
had  no  other  quaUfication  than  his  good  looks  to  fit 
him  for  the  responsibilities  of  life. 

Our  good  mother  Nature  is  perhaps  more  just 
than  we  comprehend  in  her  allotments  to  her  children 
of  the  good  things  of  the  world.  She  compensates 
for  deficiencies  and  puts  limitations  on  excesses  in 
her  subtle  manner,  and  when  we  size  it  all  up,  there 
is  not  so  much  difference  after  all  in  the  aggregate 
of  advantages  that  fall  to  the  lot  of  each  of  us. 
Your  one-talent  man  has  a  one-talent  responsibility, 
your  ten-talent  man  has  a  ten-talent  responsibility, 
and  the  amount  of  satisfaction  that  each  gets  out  of 
life  is  dependent  not  so  much  upon  the  magnitude  of 
his  undertaking  as  it  is  upon  the  cdmpleteness  with 
which  he  discharges  all  duties  involved. 

He  who  occupies  the  whole  of  his  circle  will  be 
happy,  though  it  is  of  limited  circumference,  while 
he  who  attempts  to  circumscribe  the  earth  and  fails 
to  realize  his  purpose,  will  die  in  disappointment. 

Happiness,  then,  comes  from  being  the  master  of 
the  situation  which  fate  has  allotted  to  us,  be  it  great 
or  small. 

And  this  young  man,  nameless  to  us,  who  had  cap- 
tivated our  little  winsome  friend,  settled  down  to 

129 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

the  vocation  of  a  delivery  man,  with  a  salary  so  lim- 
ited that  the  meager  home  he  established  for  the 
wife  and  the  children  who  followed  after  was  desti- 
tute of  everything  but  the  bare  necessities  of  life. 
He  adopted  the  garb  of  a  vagabond  himself,  partly 
from  necessity  and  partly  from  an  inborn  lack  of 
refinement,  which  asserted  itself  in  every  phase  of 
his  life.  Compare  these  two  men,  the  one  the  re- 
jected suitor  of  twenty  years  ago,  who  went  out 
under  a  cloud  but  who  had  come  back  crowned  with 
every  honor,  possessed  of  every  advantage  which 
wealth  and  social  prestige  can  give;  and  the  other 
subtending  the  little  circle  of  a  man  who  delivers 
onions  and  slices  of  bacon  at  the  back  door  of  the 
patrons  of  his  firm.  Well,  I  suppose  there  is  some 
satisfaction  in  being  a  handsome  delivery  man,  but 
the  admiration  invoked  is  not  of  the  kind  which  re- 
plenishes, the  larder  or  wardrobe  of  a  family  whose 
daily  requirements  are  but  insufficiently  supplied. 

The  mistake  this  young  lady  made  would  have  an 
element  of  the  ludicrous  in  it  if  it  were  not  so  terribly 
tragic.  Turning  back  the  dial  hand  of  time  twenty 
years,  we  see  her  standing  at  the  parting  of  the  ways. 
Two  roads  are  before  her.  One  is  to  lead  over  a 
stony,  barren  wilderness,  unproductive  and  uninvit- 
ing ;  the  other  is  to  lead  through  vales  of  beauty  and 

130 


THE   REJECTED    STONE 

over  mountains  of  grandeur,  where  every  comfort 
and  every  luxury  can  be  had  for  the  asking.  She 
did  not  stop  to  think;  she  just  made  one  of  those 
mad,  impulsive  decisions  which  people  sometimes 
make,  and  the  die  was  cast  which  fixed  her  social 
standing  for  all  time.  What  must  she  have  thought 
when  she  looked  into  the  countenance  of  this  august 
man  with  the  world  at  his  feet  and  compared  him 
with  the  slinking  coward  in  the  vagabond's  garb 
who  must  by  force  of  circumstances  be  her  lord  and 
master  for  all  time.  It  is  the  sad  old  story  of  Maud 
Muller,  which  never  fails  to  repeat  itself  and  leave 
its  wreck  of  humanity  upon  the  shoals  of  time  to 
bum  out  their  life-wick  in  vain  regrets  for  what 
might  have  been. 

Long  before,  the  last  vestige  of  suspicion  had  been 
lifted  from  the  name  of  our  friend  by  the  confession 
of  the  real  culprit,  who  was  paying  for  the  penalty 
of  many  crimes  behind  prison  bars.  How  wonder- 
fully true  to  the  best  interests  of  life  is  that  old  Scrip- 
tural injunction.  "Judge  not  that  ye  be  not 
judged." 

When  all  the  leading  people  of  the  community 

came  to  pay  their  respects  to  the  one  whom  they  had 

cast  out  in  dishonor,  but  who  had  returned  to  reflect 

upon  their  town  an  illumination  which  was  alto- 

131 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

gather  beyond  their  comprehension,  he  felt  that  he 
had  reached  the  real  climax  of  his  life. 

And  here  we  will  let  the  curtain  drop,  until  we  see 
him  in  perspective  once  again  in  the  summary  which 
brings  together  all  the  threads  of  narrative  of  my 
theme  and  merges  this  grand  character  into  the 
group  whose  varied  experience  I  trust  has  rounded 
out  and  ampified  some  of  the  real  philosophy  of  life. 


132 


CHAPTER  VIII 

THE  WINNER  OF  REAL  VICTORIES 

I  AM  going  to  summon  now  a  witness  whose  life 
is  intimately  familiar  to  me.  He  shall  be  the 
last.  His  testimony  is  to  supplement  the  rest,  and 
will  go  more  into  detail.  With  it  I  am  going  to 
submit  my  case. 

I  hope  the  indulgent  reader  will  catch  the  drift  of 
my  purpose  and  judge  charitably  of  the  way  the 
evidence  is  presented.  My  life's  work  is  not  to  write 
books.  By  far  the  greater  part  of  my  time  and 
attention  is  demanded  in  other  directions.  But 
through  a  varied  experience  of  successes  and  failures 
I  have  arrived  at  some  very  definite  ideas  as  to  life's 
duties  and  obligations.  I  have  known  the  vindictive 
hate  of  some  people ;  I  have  enjoyed  the  love  and  re- 
spect, I  trust,  of  very  many  more. 

At  the  age  of  forty-six  I  should  have  learned 
something  of  the  philosophy  of  life  if  I  ever  am  to 
learn  it.  Indeed,  it  may  be  a  pardonable  bit  of 
egotism  to  boast  myself  a  bit  of  a  philosopher. 

Not  that  I  have  penetrated  very  far  into  the  occult 
things  of  life.  Not  that  I  have  found  positive  proof 
133 


AFTER  TWENTY  YEARS 

of  any  theory  of  my  mundane  relationships  or  ex- 
ploited any  hypothesis  of  the  great  problems  of  the 
universe.  In  these  things  I  indulge  my  guess  as 
other  people  have  a  right  to  indulge  theirs.  But 
rather  that  I  have  arrived  at  the  situation  where  I 
am  willing  to  announce  my  life  open  for  all  truth. 
It  takes  a  long,  long  time  for  the  average  individual 
to  gain  mastery  of  his  mental  machinery  to  the  ex- 
tent that  will  enable  him  to  make  in  candor  this  an- 
nouncement. It  is  so  hard  to  get  away  from  tradi- 
tional methods  in  our  thought.  We  have  been  so 
fearful  of  trusting  our  mental  processes  without  the 
limitations  that  empiricism  has  held  about  them.  We 
have  trembled  on  the  threshold  of  the  temple  of  free- 
dom, and  feared  that  within  its  precincts  God  was 
not  to  be  found. 

I  believe  that  God  is  everywhere.  I  open  my 
castle  wall  to  the  four  winds  of  heaven,  and  invite  in 
everything  from  the  ends  of  the  earth,  which  comes 
in  the  name  of  truth.  I  am  trying  in  my  feeble  way 
to  show  my  faith  in  the  truth  that  comes  to  me,  not 
by  giving  it  a  mere  mental  assent,  but  by  incorporat- 
ing it  into  my  life,  that  I  may  walk  by  its  light  and 
have  my  footsteps  guided  by  its  admonition.  Many 
times  the  light  is  dim,  and  I  find  myself  groping  in 
the  gloaming.  Many  times,  like  you,  my  gentle 
134 


WINNER     OF     REAL    VICTORIES 

reader,  I  lose  my  way  and  have  to  come  back  to  the 
point  of  departure  to  find  the  trail  again.  But  the 
more  I  try,  the  more  easy  my  task  becomes,  and  I 
live  in  the  hope  that  the  future  may  have  in  store 
for  me  a  more  perfect  illumination  of  my  pathway, 
so  that  I  shall  not  be  in  danger  of  stumbling  and 
falling.  Sometimes,  like  you,  I  have  periods  of 
mental  exaltation,  in  which  life's  duties  all  come  out 
in  bold  relief.  And  these  moments,  these  hours  of 
inspiration,  are  the  ecstatic  periods  which  make  all 
the  rest  of  life  tolerable.  But  for  the  occasional 
influx  of  this  supermundane  intelUgence,  we  would 
be  but  animals  acting  out  animal  instincts.  As  the 
sunshine  so  reveals  the  contour  of  the  valley  that 
we  can  remember  to  walk  through  it,  safely,  even 
after  the  darkness  has  come,  so  an  hour  of  inspira- 
tion carries  us  safely  over  days  of  dullness,  when 
the  spiritual  part  of  us  acts  only  automatically,  and 
our  mental  processes  follow  only  the  old  beaten 
track. 

This  illumination  that  comes  from  above,  men 
have  tried  to  imitate  by  stimulating  the  brain  cells 
with  alcohol,  morphine,  cocaine  and  other  poisons. 
But  the  folly  of  such  spurious  inspiration  is  soon 
manifest  by  the  havoc  that  follows  in  its  wake.  The 
mental  nightmare  that  succeeds  the  day  of  exalta- 

135 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

tion  is  but  an  indication  of  the  physical  damage  that 
has  been  done,  and  it  only  requires  repetition  to 
bring  about  complete  mental  and  moral  disintegra- 
tion. But  I  am  philosophising  myself,  when  I  in- 
tended to  put  my  philosophy  into  the  lives  of  others. 

For  the  last  of  this  group  of  children  who  played 
the  game  of  chance  with  the  daisy's  petals  I  choose 
another  Bible  name.  We  will  let  him  bear  the  ap- 
pellation of  David,  memorable  from  the  days  of 
Israel's  shepherd  king. 

Not  that  there  is  anything  in  being  named  after 
kings  or  rulers.  For  often  the  achievements  of  peo- 
ple in  the  humbler  walks  of  life  are  quite  as  great 
in  kind  if  not  in  degree  as  the  deeds  of  the  men 
who  beat  down  armies  and  lift  up  thrones.  And 
this  same  David  knew  something  of  the  way  of 
conquest  on  a  modest  scale,  as  the  pages  of  his 
little  book  will  show.  He  met  with  difficulties  that 
seemed  insurmountable,  but  each  in  turn  was  con- 
jured away  by  the  magic  spell  of  will.  He  made 
plans  that  seemed  to  his  kindred  and  friends  im- 
possible of  realization,  but  to  their  amazement, 
things  seemed  to  adjust  themselves  in  line  without 
an  effort,  and  the  impossible  came  to  pass. 

David  was  bom  in  a  little  village.  He  worked  on 
his  father's  farm  from  the  earliest  years  he  can  re- 

136 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

member.  His  father  was  one  of  those  strenuous 
workers  who  never  tire  themselves,  and  who  cannot 
comprehend  that  other  people  on  account  of  their 
tender  years  or  physical  incapacity  might  tire.  Many 
times  the  little  hapless  boy  found  himself  astride  of 
a  horse  miles  from  his  home  going  to  the  wheat  field 
to  irrigate  long  before  the  break  of  day,  and  he 
made  piteous  appeals  to  his  eyes  by  continuous  rub- 
bing to  keep  them  from  closing  automatically.  And 
often  he  had  two  or  three  hours  of  work  to  perform 
in  the  hay  field  before  he  could  have  any  breakfast. 

To  this  day  a  thrill  goes  through  the  mind  of 
David  the  man  when  he  hears  the  cricket's  evening 
song,  because  it  brings  back  the  recollection  of  eve- 
nings when  twilight  faded  into  darkness,  while  he 
bent  beside  his  father  as  a  boy  and  carried  the  bun- 
dles of  wheat  into  shocks  and  raked  the  stubble 
where  they  lay. 

The  carnival  of  the  crickets  can  be  appreciated  by 
those  only  who  have  heard  their  shrill  crescendo 
v/hich  reaches  its  climax  as  the  last  ray  of  light  falls 
from  the  western  sky.  To  this  day  the  song  of  the 
meadow  lark  brings  back  to  David  a  flood  of  mem- 
ories from  the  first  dawn  of  consciousness  upon  his 
mind.  The  liquid  melody  that  filled  the  air  with  its 
vibrations,  and  came  with  a  never  ceasing  repetition 

137 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

spontaneously  from  the  heart  of  this  little  golden- 
breasted  optimist,  as  it  perched  upon  the  fence,  or 
soared  high  overhead,  had  in  it  admonition,  and  in- 
spiration and  faith  and  courage.  The  meadow  lark 
lists  himself  as  the  ally  and  friend  of  all  those  who 
foil  in  the  open  air,  and  he  throws  all  the  energy  of  his 
soul  into  the  effort  to  furnish  entertainment  for  them. 

Another  friendly  visitor  to  the  new-plowed  field 
was  the  bluebird.  His  mode  of  entertainment  was 
not  by  song,  but  by  a  peculiar  habit  of  poising  in 
the  mid  air,  and  surveying  the  field  from  this  vantage 
point  in  quest  of  worms  and  larval  insects  which  the 
plow  had  dislodged  from  their  winter  abode. 

The  little  David  had  a  friendly  acquaintance  with 
all  the  birds.  He  knew  the  mode  each  had  of  build- 
ing its  nest,  and  he  pondered  the  mystery  that  was 
going  on  in  the  little  speckled  eggs,  as  the  mother 
bird  gave  out  the  warmth  of  her  own  breast  to  hasten 
onward  the  miracle  that  she  was  producing  by  the 
magic  spell  of  her  instincts.  He  was  familiar  with 
the  eloquent  appeal  of  widely  opened  mouths  as  little 
downy  fledglings  importuned  the  passing  stranger 
for  food.  He  knew  the  hazardous  hanging  of  the 
blackbird's  nest,  always  over  the  running  brook,  and 
the  terrible  fate  that  sometimes  overtook  its  imma- 
ture inmates  when  they  crawled  over  the  edge.     He 

138 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

knew  the  nesting  place  of  the  mourning  dove,  and 
often  saw  its  two  white  eggs  burst  open  at  the  end 
and  deliver  their  downy  strangers  into  the  little  bird 
home. 

The  instinct  of  this  little  boy  was  always  humane. 
He  never  took  advantage  of  the  weak  things  of  na- 
ture to  do  them  harm.  He  sometimes  mingled  his 
tears  with  the  piteous  appeals  of  the  parent  birds 
when  some  calamity  had  overtaken  their  immature 
progeny.  He  sometimes  made  captives  of  the  birds 
as  other  boys  do,  but  the  thought  of  their  imprison- 
ment was  always  painful  to  him,  and  soon  the  hu- 
mane instinct  impelled  him  to  open  the  doors  and 
set  them  free. 

And  David  was  an  unfriended  boy  whom  none  of 
his  kindred  could  comprehend.  His  soul  was  like 
an  Aeolian  harp  which  vibrated  to  every  wood  note 
and  thrilled  with  every  breath  of  sentiment.  His 
love  for  flowers  amounted  to  an  overwhelming  pas- 
sion. The  warm  spring  days  often  found  him  wan- 
dering alone  over  the  hills  that  flanked  his  native 
village.  He  sought  the  red  bells  and  the  pinks  and 
the  mountain  daisies  in  their  sequestered  spots, 
where  their  brilliant  hues  made  contrast  with  the 
gray  landscape,  and  where  their  perfumed  breath 
gave  fragrance  to  the  passing  breeze.    The  larkspur 

139 


AFTER  TWENTY   YEARS 

and  the  honeysuckle,  and  the  mountain  mosses  and 
the  sweet  wilHams  were  all  listed  among  his  favor- 
ites. To  see  these  beautiful  forms  spring  sponta- 
neously from  the  earth  untrammeled  by  the  hand  of 
man ;  to  think  of  their  seeds  falling  from  the  lap  of 
the  wandering  winds,  and  pushing  their  delicate 
rootlets  down  into  the  dull  earth  to  extract  pigment 
for  the  gorgeous  corolla,  and  nectar  for  the  bee,  and 
fragrance  for  the  passing  stranger — all  this  was  such 
a  manifestation  of  the  spontaneous  power  of  nature, 
such  an  exhibit  of  the  occult  intellect  and  sentiment 
back  of  this  phenomenon  of  life  always  brought  a 
thrill  to  the  mind  of  young  David. 

He  looked  up  at  the  rainbow,  and  wondered  at 
the  grace  of  its  curve  and  the  brilliance  of  its  colors, 
and  tried  in  vain  to  imagine  the  reason  why  it  should 
stretch  itself  so  beautifully  across  the  summer  sky. 
Years  afterward,  when  he  learned  the  laws  of  optics, 
and  knew  how  the  sunlight  was  bent  by  refraction 
and  reflection  in  the  rain  drop  until  it  was  separated 
into  its  primary  colors  and  thrown  back  in  lurid 
vibrations  at  a  certain  angle  with  the  eye,  his  ques- 
tion was  answered,  and  the  explanation  brought  into 
his  soul  a  thrill  of  delight  which  seemed  to  lift  his 
feet  from  the  earth. 

He  threw  out  the  eternal  question-mark  before 
140 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

everything  in  heaven  and  earth,  and  pondered  much 
over  the  possible  explanation  of  the  phenomena  of 
nature  he  saw  all  around  him.  He  was  denied  in 
a  great  measure  the  companionship  of  other  children, 
and  sought  an  outlet  for  his  soul's  emotions  in  his 
contact  with  nature.  The  music  of  the  babbling 
brook  and  the  sigh  of  the  summer  breezes  were 
articulate  with  language  that  seemed  to  come  from 
the  great  abyss — that  seemed  to  bear  a  message  of 
boundless  space  and  endless  duration  of  years.  The 
wild  crash  from  the  black  thunder  cloud  seemed  to 
be  a  token  from  the  great  reserve  of  dynamic  forces, 
which  stand  as  the  background  of  all  these  mundane 
phenomena.  The  snows  of  winter  and  the  showers 
of  summer  were  manifestations  of  that  kindly  Provi- 
dence which  spreads  the  bounties  of  the  earth  be- 
neath the  feet  of  all  his  creatures. 

But  when  the  life  of  this  pensive  child  was  thrown 
open  to  the  world  of  books,  there  came  a  new  dis- 
pensation into  his  career.  How  he  loved  them  only 
they  can  tell  who  have  revelled  in  the  same  passion. 
Long  before  he  had  learned  to  read,  his  father  one 
day  brought  the  old  National  series  of  text  books 
into  their  home,  and  the  thrill  that  went  through  the 
mind  of  the  boy  at  the  sight  of  them  is  remembered 
to  this  day. 

141 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

Simply  to  hold  them  in  his  hands  and  look  at  them 
brought  a  certain  satisfaction  which  whiled  away 
hours  of  time. 

David,  the  little  ungainly  David,  soon  out-dis- 
tanced all  the  boys  and  girls  of  the  village  school. 
One  of  the  greatest  victories  of  his  life  came  when 
he  stood  up,  a  little  ragamuffin  urchin  with  thread- 
bare trousers  and  bare  feet,  in  the  spelling  match, 
and  put  to  rout  all  the  students,  great  and  small,  of 
the  whole  establishment  and  stood  unmatched  alone. 

But  those  same  students,  like  young  people  in 
general,  were  slow  to  read  the  writing  on  the  wall. 
They  failed  completely  to  grasp  the  significance  of 
such  a  demonstration,  and  still  made  of  David  a 
social  outcast,  and  threw  him  back  on  his  own  re- 
sources for  entertainment,  an  entertainment  which 
was  easy  to  provide  now  since  books  had  come  into 
his  life.  His  own  reticent  disposition  was  no  doubt 
in  some  measure  responsible  for  his  social  ostracism, 
and  a  certain  pride  which  drew  the  line  at  being 
rated  at  anything  less  than  par  value.  If  people 
wished  to  discount  him  in  the  least  and  place  him  at 
a  social  level  below  where  he  belonged,  he  simply 
refused  to  deal  with  them,  and  that  was  the  end  of  it. 

The  midnight  hour  often  found  him  bending  over 
a  favorite  volume,  or  pondering  the  solution  of  a 
142 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

mathematical  problem.  Often,  too,  his  father 
ascended  the  stairs  to  drive  him  to  bed  when  he  had 
become  utterly  oblivious  to  the  flight  of  time.  He 
was  a  gormandizer  of  books,  and  read  every  volume 
that  came  his  way.  He  studied  algebra  and  geom- 
etry and  higher  arithmetic  with  nothing  but  his  own 
intuitions  and  his  text  books  to  guide  him,  and  as  he 
followed  the  plow  or  scattered  the  seed  wheat  over 
the  fallow  field,  the  principles  of  Euclid  were  re- 
volving in  his  brain  and  finding  solution.  He  read 
history  and  fiction  and  poetry  with  that  indiscrim- 
ination which  results  from  having  no  one  to  select 
for  us  or  to  point  out  the  way  whereby  we  can  make 
our  own  selection.  He  read  and  pondered  his  Bible 
with  all  that  faith  and  sincerity  which  is  the  natural 
heritage  of  a  soul  uncontaminated  by  the  weakness 
and  evil  of  the  world.  There  were  hours  in  the  life 
of  this  lonely  boy  when  he  was  so  filled  with  the 
ecstasy  of  his  own  thoughts  and  emotions  that  he 
seemed  to  be  lifted  from  the  earth.  He  would  have 
given  worlds  for  the  companionship  of  one  who 
.could  share  his  emotions  and  partake  of  h^s  mental 
state.  He  felt  that  if  he  could  but  unburden  his 
soul  to  somebody  who  would  understand,  it  would 
be  a  satisfaction  beyond  anything  else  this  world 
could  supply.      But  his  outstretched,    supplicating 

1^3 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

arms  found  nothing  to  grasp,  and  he  was  thrown 
back  upon  his  own  resources  for  consolation. 

Denied  even  the  Hmited  social  experiences  of  a 
village,  the  ungainly  David  made  a  sorry  figure  when 
he  attempted  to  mingle  in  a  social  way  with  the 
boys  and  girls  of  the  town  a  few  miles  distant.  And 
they  were  as  charitable  as  young  people  generally 
are,  but  could  not  help  discriminating  against  him, 
and  making  side  remarks  about  him,  which  some- 
times, directly  or  indirectly,  came  to  his  ears.  If 
they  could  have  but  comprehended  the  sensitive  stuff 
he  was  made  of,  and  known  how  disparaging  words 
burned  into  his  bosom's  core,  they  would  have  been 
moved  by  pity  to  more  toleration  and  more  dis- 
crimination in  their  criticisms. 

Many  times  in  after  years  has  David  con- 
fronted the  same  people  who  thus  unwittingly  had 
wounded  him,  but  now  it  was  to  render  services  to 
them  which  his  special  training  had  qualified  him 
for,  and  he  thanked  God  that  the  opportunity  had 
come  to  return  good  for  evil.  Only  they  who  have 
had  the  experience  can  understand  that  paralysis  or 
disuse  of  all  our  social  attributes  which  overshadows 
us  when  our  tender  years  are  spent  in  seclusion,  and 
we  have  known  nothing  of  the  contact  of  our  fellow 
men.  Society  is  the  great  educator.  The  boy  of  the 
144 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

village  or  the  lonely  farm  house  inherits  a  handicap 
socially,  for  which  years  of  training  can  hardly  com- 
pensate. 

But  sometimes  the  ungainly  boy  of  the  village, 
after  a  few  laps  in  the  race,  takes  first  position,  and 
moves  on  past  all  the  rest  to  the  astonishment  and 
chagrin  of  those  who  had  sized  him  up  for  a  scrub. 

How  little  we  know,  when  we  look  into  the  un- 
meaning eyes  of  a  freckle-faced  country  boy,  what 
latent  powers  may  be  slumbering  within  his  brain, 
waiting  an  opportunity  to  burst  into  life  and  to  lift 
him  into  the  class  which  was  bom  to  do  the  serious 
work  of  the  world.  Life  is  full  of  just  such  para- 
doxes and  surprises. 

When  the  little  boy  David  was  stung  to  the  quick 
by  the  cruel  words  of  some  thoughtless  boy  or  girl, 
he  did  not  wince  before  the  pointed  shaft,  but  he  said 
to  himself,  "Some  day  they  will  comprehend." 

That  magical  phrase  "some  day" — what  romance 
does  it  not  possess  when  it  comes  from  the  life  of  an 
earnest  boy  who  has  character  and  soul  to  back  it! 
Beware  of  the  boy  who  builds  air  castles  for  the 
future.  Some  day  they  will  be  made  of  more  sub- 
stantial stuff  than  the  web  of  dreams.  In  every 
mind  of  power,  there  is  a  premonition,  a  forecast  of 
what  its  outcome  is  to  be.     The  soul  holds  always 

145 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

in  its  latent  consciousness  an  inventory  of  its  stock 
in  trade.  And  when  we  hear  a  crude  Lincoln 
from  the  backwoods  say,  as  his  heart  burns  within 
him  at  the  sight  of  fellow  creatures  being  sold  like 
beasts  of  the  field,  "If  ever  I  have  the  power  to  strike 
that  institution,  I  will  hit  it  hard,"  we  have  a  forecast 
of  the  great  Lincoln  of  the  future,  who  was  to  make 
an  epoch  in  the  world's  events ;  who  was  to  open  a 
new  chapter  in  the  history  of  his  country. 

And  the  little  boy  David  had  premonitions  of  the 
future,  as  he  bent  over  the  wearisome  tasks  that  each 
day  brought  forth. 

It  would  have  seemed  the  very  superlative  of 
egotism,  if  one  could  have  read  aloud  those  day 
dreams,  revolving  in  the  mind  of  this  apparently  in- 
significant boy.  He  could  not  decide  whether  his 
aim  should  be  to  become  the  governor  of  his  native 
State,  or  some  ecclesiastical  prelate,  or  some  pro- 
fessional man  who  should  move  into  the  front  rank 
of  his  fellows  and  challenge  the  right  of  way  with 
the  foremost  competitors.  All  he  could  conclude 
was  that  it  was  his  privilege  to  climb,  and  this  he 
proposed  to  do  with  all  the  energy  of  his  soul. 

God  had  blessed  him  with  a  retentive  memory  and 
an  insatiable  love  for  books,  and  he  knew  that  these 
were  the  factors  that  would  materialize  his  dreams 

146 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

if  they  were  turned  to  the  proper  advantage.  What 
did  it  matter  to  him  whether  he  was  wounded  by 
the  gibes  and  sneers  of  others,  or  whether  he  was 
sHghted  by  those  whose  duty  it  was  to  be  kind  to 
him?  While  the  boys  and  girls  he  knew  were 
squandering  their  days  in  frivolous  talk  and  their 
evenings  in  useless  revelry;  while  they  were  flitting 
about  like  butterflies  who  have  only  a  few  brief 
days  to  display  their- gaudy  wings  before  they  be- 
come dull  grubs,  he  was  laying  the  foundation  for  a 
career  which,  one  day  in  the  future,  was  to  fill  them 
with  astonishment. 

From  the  dim  distant  years  of  childhood  there 
comes  to  David  now,  over  the  horizon  of  memory, 
some  quaint  and  queer  recollections. 

His  mother  was  anxious,  as  all  good  mothers 
are,  to  have  him  clothed  respectably.  To  that  end 
she  exercised  her  ingenuity  to  make  him  a  suit  of 
gray  jeans,  which  was  the  staple  product  of  that 
part  of  the  country.  There  were  no  tailors  avail- 
able in  those  days,  and  every  mother  was  obliged 
to  assume  that  function  for  the  boys  and  men  of 
her  own  household.  One  can  imagine  that  there 
was  a  great  variety  of  style  and  workmanship,  de- 
pending on  the  aptitude  of  each  particular  mother, 
and  that  little  regard  was  paid  to  the  latest  styles 

147 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

and  fashions.  What  David  remembers  about  this 
particular  suit  in  question  is  that  the  seams  which 
belong  normally  at  the  sides  of  the  leg  had  a  prone- 
ness  to  rotate  round  to  the  front,  making  it  neces- 
sary to  keep  up  a  constant  watch  to  keep  them  ad- 
justed to  the  way  of  respectability. 

In  this  grotesque  array  David  went  with  his 
people  over  to  the  town,  one  holiday,  to  witness 
a  celebration.  Among  the  sports  for  children  was 
a  greasy  pole,  which  each  boy  had  the  privilege  of 
trying  to  climb  for  a  certain  prize  which  was 
stationed  at  the  top.  Without  change  of  clothing 
or  any  other  preparation,  David  undertook  the  dif- 
ficult task.  But  he  does  not  remember  to  have 
accomplished  it.  From  the  scene  of  these  festiv- 
ities with  his  clothes  covered  with  grease,  tand 
with  all  the  curiosity  of  a  boy,  David  found  his  way 
to  the  blacksmith  shop  of  a  certain  respectable 
tradesman,  who  was  plying  his  craft  in  spite 
of  the  holiday  to  satisfy  the  importunity  of 
some  hapless  farmer  of  the  village,  whose  need 
had  become  so  pressing  that  it  could  not  be  post- 
poned. David  proffered  to  blow  the  bellows  while 
the  worthy  smith  worked  at  the  anvil.  The  boy's 
position  at  his  task  was  such  that  a  part  of  the 
blast,  laden  as  it  was  with  particles  of  carbon  in  the 
148 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

smoke,  played  upon  his  grease-covered  clothes.  The 
combination  of  soot  and  grease  established  a  color 
in  parts  of  his  new  trousers  which  was  beyond  all 
efforts  on  his  part  at  removal.  In  this  dishonored 
plight  he  was  obliged  to  face  the  frowns  of  father 
and  mother  and  make  his  way  with  the  family 
caravan  homeward.  Just  what  his  well  merited 
punishment  was,  David  cannot  now  remember,  but 
the  lesson  that  comes  to  him  over  the  years  as  he  is 
surrounded  by  his  own  little  boys,  is  that  the  judg- 
ment of  children  is  defective,  because  their  minds 
are  immature,  and  that  the  admonition  of  grease 
and  soot,  and  the  black  indelible  stain  they  leave,  are 
object  lessons  more  potent  by  far  for  the  future, 
than  all  the  cruel  impressions  we  can  make,  by 
venting  our  anger  in  corporal  punishment. 

It  takes  a  certain  number  of  knocks  and  falls 
and  bruises  to  learn  the  law  of  gravitation.  You 
cannot  teach  it  by  precept,  nor  can  you  enforce 
obedience  to  it  by  the  rod.  But  when  the  child 
learns  the  pain  and  discomfiture  that  result  from 
flying  in  the  face  of  it,  he  will  obey,  because  it 
presents  itself  to  him  as  an  inexorable  law,  with 
penalties  of  immediate  execution. 

David  the  man  is  tidy  in  his  apparel  now,  not  be- 
cause of  th^  whipping  he  received  for  compounding 

149 


AFTER   TWENTY   YEARS 

grease  and  soot  into  the  fabric  of  his  new  trousers, 
but  because  he  has  learned  the  folly  of  sloven- 
liness and  the  expediency  of  being  clean. 

As  David  grew  into  his  'teens  he  was  permitted 
by  his  parents  to  attend  the  public  schools  of  the 
larger  towns.  There  he  acquitted  himself  well  as 
a  student.  His  bent  was  mathematical.  He  found 
it  no  difficult  matter  to  outstrip  most  of  his  com- 
petitors, and  the  glory  of  his  life  came  when  he 
could  outcypher  the  teacher.  He  gained  a  certain 
prestige  with  his  kindred  for  his  aptness  at  school, 
so  much  so  that  when  his  dereliction  of  duty  at 
the  tasks  he  was  supposed  to  accomplish  on  the 
farm  became  exasperating  beyond  endurance  his 
father  would  say:  "Bundle  up  his  things  and  we 
will  send  him  off  to  school.  He  is  no  good  for  any- 
thing else." 

But  one  day  the  voice  of  reason  came  to  the  little 
David,  and  he  said  to  himself,  "Why  should  I  so 
antagonize  my  parents  by  the  careless  method  of  my 
life?  All  the  benefits  that  can  come  to  me  now  are 
in  their  hands  to  bestow  or  to  withhold  at  their 
pleasure.  And  so  David  resolved  upon  a  complete 
reversal  of  his  policy.  It  should  henceforth  be 
the  study  of  his  life  to  please  father  and  mother. 
Their  will  from  this  time  on  should  be  his  law. 
150 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

Everything  was  to  be  done  not  his  way  but  their 
way,  no  matter  how  his  own  judgment  might  dictate 
the  contrary  method.  And  the  domestic  troubles  of 
David  came  to  a  sudden  end,  and  the  plan  of  his 
education  took  tangible  form,  with  father  to  back 
him  to  the  limit. 

The  district  schools  had  ceased  to  be  of  any 
service  to  him.  He  had  gone  over  the  same  beaten 
path  a  number  of  times,  the  terminus  of  which  was 
fixed  by  the  limit  of  the  teacher's  qualification.  When 
the  end  of  the  book  was  reached,  instead  of  pro- 
viding for  a  step  higher,  the  worthy  pedagogue  of 
those  days  would  simply  turn  back  to  the  beginning, 
and  start  the  whole  process  over  again.  How  many 
times  David  learned  by  rote  to  extract  the  square 
root  and  the  cube  root  he  cannot  now  remember,  but 
he  does  recall  that  when  the  underlying  principles 
of  these  mathematical  processes  were  explained  to 
him  in  high  school,  it  was  a  complete  new  revelation, 
and  he  never  needed  to  think  about  a  rule  after- 
wards. 

David  had  decided  that  unless  he  could  gain  ac- 
cess to  the  high  school,  he  would  have  to  undertake 
the  task  of  educating  himself.  And  to  that  end  his 
private  room  was  provided  with  a  heating  stove 
and  a  table,  and  stocked  with  all  the  books  the  house- 

151 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

hold  possessed.  And  after  the  hard  day's  work  on 
the  farm  was  ended  and  the  evening  chores  disposed 
of,  David  sought  the  seclusion  of  his  room,  and 
read  and  pondered  and  dreamed.  In  the  morning 
long  before  the  other  inmates  of  the  household  were 
astir,  he  was  at  his  books  again,  with  all  the  zeal 
that  is  born  of  refreshing  sleep;  and  when  storms 
swept  over  the  valley,  and  made  work  on  the  farm 
impossible,  David  in  his  silent  retreat  was  tilling  an- 
other field  which  one  day  in  the  future  was  to  de- 
velop and  produce  a  bounteous  harvest. 

A  certain  philosophy  developed  in  the  mind  of 
the  boy  as  he  read.  He  seemed  to  gain  the  ascend- 
ency over  all  his  mental  processes,  and  to  have  him- 
self completely  under  control.  So  thoroughly  did 
he  believe  in  himself  that  he  wondered  why  other 
people  did  not  believe  in  him.  The  unkind  words  of 
those  who  insinuated  that  his  peculiar  bent  was  the 
indication  of  a  strange  eccentricity  were  very  hurtful 
to  him.  But  he  bided  his  time  without  reply.  He 
had  yet  to  learn  that  the  greatest  offense  one  can 
commit  against  a  rival  is  to  succeed  where  he  has 
failed. 

Your  life  never  amounts  to  much  until  you 
rouse  a  storm  of  opposition  and  criticism  from  your 
contemporaries.     When  you  throw  a  ball  against 

152 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

the  wall  it  must  bounce  back,  and  the  harder  you 
throw,  the  more  vigorous  will  be  the  rebound.  That 
wave  of  criticism  which  arises  all  around  you  when 
you  begin  to  do  something  which  others  have  not 
done  is  the  rebound  of  your  action,  and  the  more 
vigorous  your  effort,  the  more  vigorous  will  be  the 
response  to  it.  So,  young  man,  whoever  you  are, 
whenever  a  wave  of  criticism  sets  in  against  you 
in  answer  to  earnest,  honest  effort,  keep  right  on  in 
that  direction,  and  be  assured  that  you  are  on  the 
right  road.  After  awhile  your  critics  will  come 
to  the  temple  you  have  erected,  and  become  earnest 
worshipers  there.  When  the  years  have  brought 
your  vindication,  the  very  people  who  opposed  you 
will  delight  to  tell  the  story  of  your  struggles,  and 
to  relate  the  things  you  accomplished  in  the  face  of 
opposition. 

The  inexperienced  boy  David,  in  his  generous 
outlook  upon  life,  imagined  that  all  people  are 
moved  by  altruistic  motives.  He  had  yet  to  learn 
the  meagre  soul,  the  selfish  motive,  the  suspicious 
nature  of  many  people.  And  this  is  the  saddest, 
the  most  disappointing  experience  of  any  develop- 
ing mind.  To  see  people  abdicate  their  high  estate, 
their  priceless  birthright  of  honor  and  altruism, 
and  become  selfish  and  mean  and  suspicious  and 

153 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

dishonest  is  such  a  condescension  that  it  shocks  the 
sensibilities  of  those  whose  inexperience  has  kept 
them  in  blissful  ignorance  of  such  possibilties. 

And  David  had  a  graphic  lesson  in  psychology 
one  day  that  served  by  its  analogy  a  useful  purpose 
in  the  after  years.  He  saw  a  little  cat  pursued  by 
five  or  six  big  dogs,  all  barking  and  growling  in 
furious  anger,  ready  to  tear  the  little  feline  refugee 
to  pieces  at  the  first  opportunity.  But  the  kitten, 
true  to  the  instinct  of  her  race,  had  taken  a  strategic 
position  under  the  floor  of  a  barn,  and  by  violent 
sputtering  and  scratching  was  holding  her  formid- 
able antagonists  at  bay.  David,  moved  by  pity, 
came  to  her  rescue,  but  the  hand  he  had  pro- 
jected under  the  floor  to  assist  her,  was  scratched 
ten  times  before  he  could  withdraw  it.  The  little 
feline  mind  was  so  inflamed  by  the  thought  of  its 
formidable  enemies,  that  it  could  not  distinguish 
between  friend  and  foe,  and  it  treated  them  both 
alike. 

This  is  just  the  mental  condition  of  many  people. 
They  allow  their  minds  to  dwell  upon  grievances, 
either  real  or  imaginary,  until  they  see  acts  of  hos- 
tility in  the  very  eflFort  to  do  them  good.  They 
accept  of  the  gratuity  with  a  feeling  that  some 
ulterior  motive  has  prompted  its  bestowal,  and  pro- 

154 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

ceed  to  berate  the  benefactor,  as  though  he  were 
doing  them  an  injury. 

The  lesson  is,  that  we  should  have  charity  in  our 
hearts  even  for  those  ungrateful  people  who  accept 
of  our  bounty  and  then  turn  to  rend  us.  They 
are  acting  out  the  logical  deductions  of  minds  per- 
verted by  inheritance  or  faulty  training. 

A  day  of  great  rejoicing  came  to  the  little  David, 
as  he  followed  the  routine  work  of  the  farm.  His 
parents  had  decided  that  he  might  go  to  high  school. 
Out  of  his  frugality  some  little  money  had  been 
saved,  and  the  father  proffered  to  supplement  it 
with  the  amount  necessary  to  pay  his  board  and 
tuition  for  the  winter.  How  well  he  remembers 
the  preparation  of  his  clothing  and  the  selection  of 
the  books  he  was  to  take  and  the  daily  admonition  of 
his  parents  as  to  his  conduct  when  away.  Every 
boy  and  g^rl  can  imagine  this  who  has  gone  through 
the  same  process. 

And  the  fear  and  suspense  that  were  in  his  mind 
at  the  thought  of  mingling  with  boys  and  girls  from 
the  cities  and  larger  towns,  where  they  would  be 
instructed  in  social  forms  and  have  a  heritage  of 
gentle  breeding.  David  felt  ill  at  ease  among 
them,  and  was  always  conscious  of  his  limitations 
on  the  social  side,  and  fearful  that  he  might  com- 

155 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

mit  some  blunder.  These  well-dressed  boys  and 
gfirls  from  the  cities  seemed  to  be  so  grand  in  his 
eyes  that  he  was  overawed  and  overwhelmed  by 
them.  He  had  still  to  learn  the  great  lesson  in  life, 
that  tinsel  may  simulate  pure  gold  and  have  all  the 
outward   appearance   of  the   royal  metal. 

As  David  now  looks  around,  after  a  score  of  years 
have  rolled  over  his  head,  he  sees  the  social  stars  of 
the  first  magnitude  reduced  almost  to  nothing. 
Some  of  them  indeed  have  ceased  to  be  social  fac- 
tors, but  have  associated  themselves  into  that  milky 
way  of  social  star  dust,  which  projects  itself  dead 
and  motionless  in  the  interspaces  between  the  active 
constellations.  Their  light  no  longer  shines  as  a 
distinct  entity,  but  mingles  itself  with  the  haze  of 
others  of  its  kind  to  map  out  a  huge  meaningless 
blur  on  the  social  horizon,  where  nothing  is  pre- 
tended and  nothing  has  been  accomplished.  Of  the 
score  or  more  of  the  social  leaders  of  this  particular 
high  school,  David  looks  all  about  himself  in  vain 
to  discover  one  of  them  who  has  risen  to  distinction. 
They  are  wiped  off  the  map  completely.  They  were 
gaudy  butterflies  then,  but  they  have  become  dull 
grubs  now,  which  grope  in  darkness,  and  seek  the 
back  streets  of  the  villages  to  hide  their  faces  from 
the  sight  of  men.    They  live  automatically,  breath- 

156 


WINNER     OF     REAL    VICTORIES 

ing  so  much  oxygen,  and  consuming  so  much  water 
and  food,  maintaining  the  vegetative  processes  of 
life,  and  waiting  until  the  merciful  hand  of  Fate 
waves  their  exit  and  relieves  them  of  the  necessity 
of  living  any  more. 

But  the  ranks  of  those  who  are  doing  the  world's 
work,  and  giving  the  world  its  new  thoughts  are 
being  recruited  from  the  honest  plodder,  whose 
underlying  motives  were  not  for  social  distinction, 
but  for  knowledge,  who  knew  the  value  of  the  fleet- 
ing moments,  and  doled  them  out  as  the  miser  doles 
out  his  coins  when  necessity  demands  them.  And 
the  transformation  of  a  score  of  years  has  been  a 
complete  one.  It  is  a  picture  printed  from  the 
negative — the  light  has  become  darkness  and  the 
darkness  has  become  light.  That  scripture  which 
says,  "The  last  shall  be  first  and  the  first  shall  be 
last"  is  wonderfully  true  to  life.  We  look  over  the 
sweep  of  a  score  of  years  since  we  were  boys  and 
girls  together,  and  we  see  its  absolute  fulfillment. 

As  a  student  at  high  school  David  was  diligent 
and  painstaking  and  enthusiastic.  He  threw  all  the 
energy  of  his  soul  into  the  work,  and  never  was 
known  to  report  himself  unprepared  at  classes. 
There  are  in  his  possession  now  text-books  of  geom- 
etry and  trigonometry,  with  the  comers  all  charred 

157 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

and  burned,  which  tell  their  story  of  his  effort  to 
force  the  day  into  the  night,  and  when  falling  asleep 
in  spite  of  himself,  the  book  in  his  hand  went 
against  the  heating  stove  to  receive  its  brand  of  dil- 
igence and  perpetuate  the  incidents  of  that  struggle. 

At  that  particular  time  David  had  no  fixed  goal 
toward  which  he  was  aiming.  He  was  impelled  by 
an  instinct  of  self-development,  as  the  duckling  has 
an  instinct  to  swim.  Engrossed  in  the  all  absorbing 
studies  of  his  curriculum,  he  was  all  unmindful  of 
the  future.  He  seemed  to  know  that  the  events  of 
his  life  would  throw  themselves  into  logical  se- 
quence. His  one  aim  now  was  to  become  master  of 
the  fundamentals. 

The  choice  of  a  profession  was  a  thing  that  came 
later  in  life.  When  David  used  to  sit  out  in  the 
evenings  to  read  his  star  maps  by  the  aid  of  a 
dim  lantern  light,  and  to  figure  out  the  topography 
of  the  different  constellations,  the  people  of  the  vil- 
lage, and  even  his  own  kindred,  began  to  have  their 
doubts  about  his  sanity.  But  Cassiopia,  and  Ursa 
Major  and  the  Pleiades  sent  their  message  of  sym- 
pathy over  the  abyss  to  console  the  eager  mind  of 
the  struggling  boy.  Natural  philosophy  and  chemis- 
try yielded  their  fascinating  secrets,  and  above  all 
geology  opened  its  volumes  of  rock-written  history, 

158 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

and  invested  the  mountains  and  the  rivers  and  the 
cliffs  of  rock  and  even  the  common  boulders  with  a 
meaning  they  had  never  before  possessed.  From 
the  little  circumscribed  horizon  which  was  hedged 
in  by  his  meagre  knowledge  of  the  physical  world, 
and  by  the  extreme  orthodox  position  of  all  the 
people  he  had  associated  with,  David  rose  to  the 
conception  of  boundless  space  and  endless  duration 
of  years.  Long  afterward  when  David  as  a  profes- 
sional man  traveled  through  the  mountain  passes 
and  valleys  of  his  native  section,  as  his  daily  duty 
necessitated  him  to  do,  his  smattering  of  geological 
lore  furnished  the  materials  for  a  continuous  specu- 
lation on  the  age  and  origin  and  probable  correlation 
of  the  cliffs  of  rock  and  gorges  and  fossil  remains 
that  he  encountered  by  the  wajtside,  land  every 
rude  boulder  had  for  him  a  story  of  thrilling  fasci- 
nation. 

And  David  came  up  against  the  great  world 
problems  of  philosophy  and  religion,  and  was  made 
to  wonder  at  the  different  conclusions  that  had 
been  arrived  at  by  various  classes  of  men  in  all 
ages;  and  at  the  positiveness  of  their  contentions 
and  the  vehemence  with  which  they  asserted  them- 
selves. He  had  grasped  in  his  mind  the  conception 
of  the  boundless  extent  of  the  universe,  and  the 

159 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

inexorable  laws  that  govern  all  its  processes,  and 
in  these  great  thoughts  he  saw  a  vindication  of  the 
contention  for  Deity.  Such  law  and  order  without 
a  law  Giver  and  a  Regulator  was  to  his  mind  an 
absurdity.  Materialism  was  to  him  then,  as  it  is 
now,  the  negation  of  the  universe. 

But  why  should  men  group  themselves  into 
leagues  of  allegience  known  as  churches  to  attribute 
different  purposes  and  different  methods  to  the  God 
they  all  worship?  Why  should  others  contend  that 
no  God  is  necessary  to  the  cosmic  process,  while 
they  tacitly  admit  the  omniscience  that  is  manifest 
in  the  perfection  of  the  laws  of  nature?  All  these 
things  were  most  confusing  to  the  evolving  mind 
of  the  boy.  And  then  there  was  his  own  relationship 
to  the  phenomena  of  the  world.  Whence  came  he  ? 
what  was  he  here  for?  and  whither  was  he  to  go? 
These  were  queries  he  could  not  get  away  from  even 
if  he  tried.  But  why  should  he  try  to  get  away  from 
them?  Do  they  not  involve  the  most  momentous 
consequences  of  anything  in  this  world  ?  I  take  issue 
with  all  those  who  maintain  the  position  that  it  is 
dangerous  to  confront  the  problem  of  the  relation- 
ship of  modern  scientific  development  with  the  re- 
ligious dogmas  that  have  come  down  to  us  from 
ages  past. 

160 


WINNER     OF     REAL    VICTORIES 

In  the  first  place,  you  cannot,  if  you  should 
try,  keep  intelligent  minds  away  from  this 
problem.  It  is  the  most  fascinating  theme  of  thought 
in  all  the  world.  If  it  is  put  under  the  ban  of  the 
church  by  over  zealous  sectarians,  it  will  smoulder 
beneath  the  surface  with  ever  increasing  force,  until 
one  day  it  will  burst  forth  into  a  conflagration. 
This  was  the  fate  of  the  Catholic  church  at  the 
beginning  of  the  Reformation.  The  idea  that  men 
were  to  cease  to  think  for  themselves,  but  in  all 
things  to  be  governed  by  the  traditions  of  bygone 
ages;  that  the  dead  past  was  to  step  into  the  living 
present  and  dominate  absolutely  its  thought,  was  the 
thing  which  turned  the  hand  of  progress  back  a 
thousand  years,  and  kept  untold  millions  of  people 
bound  hand  and  foot  in  the  thralldom  of  supersti- 
tion. The  middle  ages  present  to  us  a  spectacle 
of  human  intelligence  held  completely  in  abeyance 
by  the  iron  hand  of  tradition. 

It  was  not  that  the  world  was  turned  over 
to  the  dominion  of  Satan.  It  was  not  that 
mankind  had  degenerated  into  an  inferior  breed. 
Physically  and  potentially  men  were  just  the 
same  during  that  whole  dark  period  as  they 
had  been  in  the  rising  dawn  of  enlightenment  which 
had  preceded  it,  as  they  are  now  in  the  noon-tide 

161 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

of  civilization,  with  the  sun  of  truth  ascended  to 
the  zenith.  It  was  simply  an  example  on  a  world 
scale  of  the  working  out  of  the  idea  that  human 
intelligence  must  not  be  permitted  to  penetrate  fields 
hitherto  unexplored;  that  human  beings  must  not 
think  away  from  the  traditions  of  the  past,  no  matter 
how  much  these  traditions  have  become  perverted, 
or  how  incompatible  they  have  become  with  com- 
mon sense  and  reason. 

Stagnation  was  the  result.  And  in  the  mental  heb- 
etude that  settled  like  a  cloud  over  the  mind  of  men, 
the  weak  were  preyed  upon  by  the  strong — the  forces 
of  evil  thrive  ever  better  in  the  darkness — and  the 
edict  that  went  forth  in  the  name  of  the  Church  was 
absolute  and  unconditional.  There  was  no  higher 
court  of  human  intelligence  to  pass  upon  appeals  nor 
to  consider  the  possible  errors  of  that  tribunal  which 
held  itself  to  be  infallible.  In  such  a  system,  the  dead 
forms  were  maintained,  but  the  spirit  of  religion  was 
extinguished.  For  a  thousand  years  no  scientific 
advancement  was  made,  and  no  new  thought  given 
to  the  world.  Men  became  vicious  and  brutal  in 
their  instincts.  Vice  ran  riot;  justice  had  no  place 
in  the  world.  But  beneath  the  surface  of  this  ap- 
parently motionless  social  fabric,  there  was  a  move- 
ment in  progress  that  was  one  day  to  tear  it  asunder, 

162 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

Even  the  muffler  of  church  anthemas  could  not  pre- 
vent men  from  thinking,  though  the  terrible  conse- 
quences, temporal  and  spiritual,  which  that  involved 
were  sufficient  to  deter  all  but  the  bravest  from  as- 
serting themselves.  After  long  centuries  of  this 
world-stagnation  had  worn  themselves  away,  the 
accumulated  mind  pressure  from  within  became  so 
intense  that  it  burst  asunder  the  relentless  bonds 
which  had  held  it,  and  with  them  the  whole  social 
and  ecclesiastical  structure  which  had  made  them 
possible. 

The  example  of  individuals,  who,  with  their 
lives  in  their  hands,  dared  to  proclaim  the  right 
of  independent  thought  was  soon  to  bear  fruit. 
Whole  nations  emancipated  themselves,  and  went 
over  to  the  new  movement,  which  in  art  and  science 
and  literature  we  call  the  Renaissance,  which  in  re- 
ligion we  call  the  Reformation.  And  the  great  world 
system  which  had  held  the  minds  of  men  in  subjec- 
tion for  a  thousand  years  was  irreparably  divided. 
Any  religious  system  which  demands  of  its  subjects 
the  absolute  surrender  of  individual  opinion  will  find 
itself  defeated  in  the  end.  For  the  world  is  built  on 
the  plan  of  progression,  and  no  system  of  thought, 
secular  or  religious,  can  for  any  great  length  of  time 
stop  the  onward  movement  of  things. 

163 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

As  with  society,  so  with  the  individual ;  limitation 
of  thought  means  limitation  of  growth.  Faculties 
unemployed  become  palsied.  Nature  has  laid  on  us 
the  injunction  that  we  put  our  mental  talents  out 
at  usury  or  we  forfeit  the  right  to  them.  God  gave 
us  intelligence  that  we  might  employ  it  to  a  useful 
purpose,  and  act  well  our  part  in  the  great  world 
drama  of  progression. 

What  a  formidable  thing  is  the  term  orthodoxy! 
In  ages  past  it  has  held  the  prerogative  of  life  or 
death  in  its  all-powerful  grasp.  The  greatest  penalty 
at  its  disposal  in  this  enlightened  age  is  social 
ostracism,  and  even  this  it  applies  with  an  un- 
certain issue.  In  the  utlimate  analysis  ortho- 
doxy means  conformity  to  tradition.  The  definition 
of  the  term  has  been  modified  with  the  more  liberal 
outlook  on  life  that  our  modern  civilization  has 
brought  about.  Thanks  to  the  new  interpretation, 
we  can  still  be  orthodox  without  necessarily  believ- 
ing that  the  whale  swallowed  Jonah.  With  the 
limitations  we  have  thrown  about  it,  the  term  is 
useful  in  its  application.  Modem  speculation  tends 
to  veer  ever  too  far  away  from  the  old  moorings, 
and  to  drift  without  rudder  or  helm  to  guide  it. 
Men  have  become  fanatical  in  the  application  of  new 
theories,  and  are  demanding  the  same  unquestioning 

164 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

acquiescence  in  their  position  that  was  demanded  by 
the  religious  bigots  of  the  middle  ages, 

A  man,  up  to  very  recent  years,  could  have  no 
respectable  standing  in  the  scientific  world,  who  was 
not  willing  to  pronounce  the  shibboleth  of  Mr.  Dar- 
win's theory  in  its  material  aspect.  Speculations 
on  the  spiritual  side  of  life  are  altogether  unpopular, 
and  carry  with  them  the  idea  of  heretical  departure 
from  fixed  opinions.  Modem  science  is  taking 
altogether  too  much  for  granted.  The  modem  scien- 
tific mind  needs  liberalizing  from  its  traditions. 
Our  constant  search  should  be  for  the  truth.  There 
are  not  in  this  world  of  ours  two  distinct  sets  of 
truths,  incompatible  with  one  another.  There  can 
be  no  conflict  between  religion  and  science  if  we 
have  true  religion  and  true  science.  Incompatibility 
means  misunderstanding.  Truth  is  not  divided 
against  itself.  God  is  not  the  author  of  confusion. 
If  we  endeavor  to  deny  men  the  right  of  freedom 
of  thought  in  philosophy  and  religion,  we  shall 
continue  the  so-called  conflict  between  science  and 
religion  indefinitely  into  the  future. 

But  I  am  forgetting  myself,  and  putting  too  much 
personality  into  my  narrative.  I  am  describing  the 
play  of  emotions  that  developed  in  the  mind  of  the 

165 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

young  man  who  first  comes  up  against  the  great 
problems  of  science  and  religion.  I  shall,  therefore, 
proceed  with  my  story. 

Our  David  had  been  a  great  reader,  but  his  read- 
ing had  been  of  the  authors  of  the  old  school.  Pe- 
rusal of  Rollin  and  much  attention  to  the  Bible  had 
given  him  a  strong  orthodox  bias,  and  his  reasoning 
had  all  along  been  the  method  that  makes  all  things 
conform  to  preconceived  ideas  and  empirical  thought. 
But  now  he  came  up  against  the  great  problems  of 
geological  time  and  of  evolution.  How  was  he  to 
harmonize  these  with  that  tradition  which  made 
the  earth  only  six  thousand  years  old  and  initiated 
the  species  of  life  all  at  once  by  a  simple  command 
of  Deity?  It  was  such  a  simple,  easy  process  to 
have  a  world  created  in  that  way,  and  required  so 
little  mental  effort  to  decipher  the  plan  of  it!  The 
untutored  boy  had  not  yet  dared  to  call  in  question 
any  of  the  old  traditions.  In  his  mind  it  amounted 
to  a  mortal  crime  to  raise  such  a  question. 

But  a  riper  mentality  completely  changed  his 
viewpoint.  And  he  said  to  himself,  "In  this 
great  universe  which  God  has  created  and  placed 
at  my  disposal  with  all  its  varied  things  of  beauty 
and  of  interest,  who  should  have  the  right  to  limit 
the  processes  of  my  mind,  to  put  a  barrier  in  my 

166 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

way  and  say,  "You  can  think  thus  far  and  no 
farther."  It  is  my  prerogative,  it  is  my  God-given 
birthright,  to  throw  out  the  eternal  question  mark 
before  everything  in  heaven  and  earth,  and  challenge 
the  right  of  way  with  every  purported  truth.  And 
the  pendulum  swung  too  far  the  other  way  and 
the  boy  found  himself  drifting  from  his  moorings 
without  rudder  or  compass  to  guide  him. 

Among  the  rural  folk  who  were  the  associates 
of  David  he  found  nobody  who  seemed  to  see  things 
from  his  viewpoint,  or  who  was  troubling  himself 
about  anything  in  religion  or  science,  but  the  old 
theological  dogmas.  He  wondered  why  it  was  that 
he  seemed  so  different  from  other  people.  Some- 
times it  seemed  to  him  that  an  evil  power  had  got 
possession  of  him  and  that  he  was  irreparably  lost. 
But  a  more  mature  mentality  brought  him  in  con- 
tact with  many  more  of  his  kind,  and  then  he  com- 
prehended that  he  was  but  one  of  a  multitude  who 
were  struggling  with  the  great  world  problem. 

And  are  you,  my  reader,  in  sympathy  with  this 
life-and-death  struggle,  which  this  honest,  conscienci- 
ous  boy  found  himself  confronted  with?  I  know 
that  if  your  mentality  is  of  the  same  kind,  you  your- 
self have  shed  tears  of  anguish  and  sent  up  prayers 
to  the  throne  of  Grace  for  guidance.     It  is  the  ef- 

167 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

fort  of  the  churches  to  evade  these  burning  question? 
which  has  emptied  their  pews  and  brought  religion 
into  discredit.  The  permanence  of  any  institution 
depends  on  the  amount  of  truth  it  has  back  of  it. 
Error  though  it  comes  in  the  name  of  Deity  must 
crumble  and  decay.    Only  the  truth  can  stand. 

This  book  is  written  twenty  years  after  the  strug- 
gle began,  and  reflects  the  final  deductions  to  date 
on  this  momentous  theme.  And  David  has  learned 
to  tolerate  the  opinions  of  others,  as  he  trusts  the 
indulgent  reader  will  tolerate  the  opinions  which 
are  to  follow  in  a  subsequent  chapter  and  which  he 
alone  stands  responsible  for. 

David's  enthusiasm,  while  still  at  the  high  school, 
grew  with  the  years  and  he  listed  himself  always 
with  the  competitors  for  first  position  in  his  classes. 
And  they  were  happy  years  despite  the  handicaps 
that  'were  entailed  from  his  rural  extraction  and 
his   physical    imperfections. 

Recognizing  the  important  bearing  that  ability 
at  public  speaking  has  on  the  career  of  any  man,  no 
matter  what  his  profession,  David  determined  that  he 
would  develop  himself  along  this  line. 

There  was  a  certain  Sunday  morning  meeting  he 
used  to  attend,  where  students  and  teachers  volun- 
teered to  speak  as  they  were  moved  upon  by  the 

168 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

Spirit.  He  resolved  that  at  one  of  these  sessions 
he  would  make  a  beginning.  When  the  audience 
was  wrought  up  with  enthusiasm  and  students  were 
rising  to  their  feet  in  quick  succession,  he  chose 
an  opportune  moment  to  sandwich  himself  into  the 
program,  for  the  time  was  in  much  demand.  No 
sooner  had  he  gained  his  feet  than  his  head  began 
to  whirl,  and  all  the  ideas  he  had  ever  had  seemed 
to  depart  from  him.  He  sat  down  in  shame  and 
confusion. 

No  one  who  has  not  gone  through  the  process  can 
imagine  the  melancholy  condition  of  a  sensitive  mind 
so  humiliated.  He  was  defeated,  but  not  conquered. 
He  resolved  then  and  there  that  with  the  aid  of 
God  he  would  surmount  every  obstacle  that  might 
come  in  his  way. 

A  few  days  later  a  call  was  made  for  volunteers 
to  speak  on  a  certain  subject  before  the  whole  school 
assembled.  The  hand  of  David  went  up  in  response, 
though  it  took  all  the  courage  he  could  muster  to 
raise  it.  This  time  he  proposed  to  maintain  his 
mental  balance  by  having  notes  to  refer  to.  When 
the  hour  arrived  he  confronted  his  audience  with 
fear  and  trembling,  and  in  some  sort  of  way  got 
through  his  task  without  making  a  balk.  But  the 
old  master  rose  to  his  feet  and  soundly  berated 
169 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

the  frightened  boy  for  daring  to  appear  in  such  a 
meeting  with  notes  to  speak  from. 

After  such  a  steam  roller  process  the  boy  felt  him- 
self smashed  so  flatly  to  the  earth  that  he  could 
hardly  raise  his  head.  But  his  resolution  only  grew 
stronger  as  obstacles  multiplied.  Every  opportunity 
that  presented  itself  found  him  confronting  the 
public.  Gradually  the  latent  fear  which  had  so 
nearly  overwhelmed  him  gave  way  to  confidence, 
and  people  began  to  express  satisfaction  at  his  ora- 
torical  efforts. 

As  an  acknowledgment  of  his  success  there  came 
to  him  as  a  great  surprise  an  invitation  and  request 
from  the  faculty  that  he  should  deliver  the  address 
on  mathematics  at  the  commencement  exercises  to 
be  held  in  a  public  auditorium  in  the  presence  of  all 
the  prominent  people  of  the  community. 

Into  this  final  appearance  before  the  faculty  and 
the  student  body  and  the  assembled  multitude  he 
threw  all  the  energy  of  his  soul.  To  them  it  was  pos- 
sibly nothing  more  than  a  passing  number  on  the 
program,  rendered  with  some  degree  of  credit  by  a 
boy  of  backwoods  extraction.  But  to  him  it  was  the 
culmination  of  one  of  the  great  struggles  of  his 
life,  a  milestone  in  the  way  of  his  progress. 

David  the  man  has  many  vivid  recollections  of 
170 


WINNER     OF     REAL     VICTORIES 

boys  and  girls  who  came  and  went  like  flakes  of  a 
winter  storm  to  alight  upon  the  earth  and  take  up 
their  place  in  the  snowdrifts  we  call  cities,  or  to  fall 
upon  the  level  plane  where  all  things  are  equal.  With 
the  eye  of  philosophy  he  analyzes  now  their  mental 
and  moral  make-up  and  is  convinced  that  to  each 
one  has  been  dealt  out  just  exactly  the  reward  he 
merited.  For  nature  is  just  in  all  her  processes. 
The  eternal  chancellors  of  God  are  cause  and  ef- 
fect. Any  man  who  tries  to  gain  credit  and  favor 
by  any  other  method  than  that  based  upon  value 
received,  is  a  thief  and  a  robber,  and  in  the  end  he 
will  find  himself  deceived  and  defeated.  But  how 
little  we  comprehended  in  that  school-boy  day  these 
inexorable  laws  of  nature ;  and  how  little  we  thought 
of  the  great  readjustment  that  was  to  come  with 
the  years,  when  we  were  to  go  out  each  individually 
and  meet  the  real  problems  of  life! 

It  was  a  play  world  then  full  of  gossamer  dreams. 
Fine  personality,  fine  manners,  and  fine  clothes 
seemed  to  be  the  elements  of  success  in  life.  Merit 
for  merit's  sake  we  hardly  perceived.  The  ungainly 
boy  from  the  backwoods  town  seemed  to  have  a 
hopeless  case.  He  hardly  dared  to  believe  in  him- 
self. But  twenty  years  of  real  experience  have  sup- 
planted the  gossamer  dreams  with  real  facts.    Life's 

171 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

method  and  motive  with  each  one  have  rendered 
their  verdict.  Honor  has  developed  where  it  was 
least  expected,  and  discredit  has  fallen  upon  heads 
that  were  erect  with  pride. 


172 


CHAPTER  IX 

SATELLITES  AND  LUMINARIES 

AMONG  the  many  illustrations  of  the  outcome 
of  reputations  which  were  based  on  tinsel,  and 
show,  David  remembers  a  certain  young  man  and  a 
certain  young  lady,  who  came  each  from  different 
parts  of  the  country  and  matriculated  at  the  high 
school.  The  verdict  of  the  students  was  that  they 
were  both  very  handsome.  They  dressed  well  and 
had  splendid  manners.  At  least,  this  was  the  opinion 
of  the  backwoods  boys  and  girls,  though  it  would  no 
doubt  have  been  much  modified  by  more  mature 
judgment.  At  any  rate  they  were  the  belle  and  beau 
of  the  school,  and  the  boys  and  girls  gave  them  the 
right  of  way — a  privilege  which  they  accepted  as  a 
rcyal  prerogative  and  regarded  as  their  birthright. 
To  the  untutored  mind  of  David  they  were  certainly 
grand.  They  seemed  to  be  out  of  his  class  com- 
pletely and  he  marveled  at  the  sight  of  them.  Nature 
seemed  to  him  to  have  strewn  their  pathway  with 
roses  and  opened  the  way  of  success  in  life  without 
requiring  of  them  a  single  effort.     No  doubt  they 

173 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

were  convinced  in  their  own  mind  of  the  same  thing. 

When  the  school  days  were  ended  they  went  their 
way  as  the  rest  of  the  students  did  and  were  lost 
to  view  for  many  years. 

After  the  school  days  your  star  of  the  first  magni- 
tiide  and  of  the  second  magnitude  and  of  all  the 
magnitudes  is  lost  to  vision  for  a  period  of  time. 
Many  of  them  are  gone  forever,  but  some  rise  over 
the  horizon  again  and  ascend  toward  the  zenith  aug- 
menting as  they  go.  Some  become  satellites,  shin- 
ing, when  they  do  shine,  by  the  light  they  borrow 
from  others  around  which  they  must  always  re- 
volve. And  others  become  luminaries,  emitting  their 
own  light,  and  drawing  a  retinue  of  satellites  in  their 
train.  Some  disintegrate  into  star  dust  and  dissem- 
inate into  the  milky  way;  some  shoot  across  the 
heavens  like  meteors  and  burn  themselves  out  in  a 
great  flare  of  light,  ending  in  ashes  and  cinders; 
some  collide  with  others  and  burst  themselves 
asunder  in  the  impact;  and  some  become  the  fixed 
stars  whose  light  shines  on  forever  and  ever. 

And  David  is  scanning  the  heavens  now  with 
the  mental  telescope,  watching  for  the  stars  of  by- 
gone days  to  rise  again.  When  ten  years  have 
elapsed  and  they  fail  to  come  he  marks  them  as 
very  doubtful,  and  when  twenty  years  brings  no  tid- 

174 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

ings  of  them  he  classifies  them  as  hopeless  and 
marks  them  off  his  chart. 

The  young  couple  we  are  describing  had  gone 
into  the  limbo  to  await  their  fate.  By  accident  David 
called  one  day  in  a  little  grocery  store  in  a  sequest- 
ered village  remote  from  the  towns  and  cities  and 
met  a  middle  aged  woman  serving  in  the  capacity  of 
saleswoman,  dealing  out  sugar  and  coal  oil  in  small 
quantities  and  marking  the  score  against  her  neigh- 
bors in  a  well-worn  account  book.  The  finger  of 
time  had  engraved  its  record  upon  her  countenance ; 
the  frosts  of  forty  years  had  begun  their  bleaching 
process.  Her  gown  was  seedy,  her  hair  unkempt, 
and  withal  she  had  a  forlorn  appearance  that  was 
sad  to  contemplate.  The  poetry  had  all  gone  out 
of  her  life  to  be  supplanted  by  the  dullest  kind  of 
prose. 

A  few  direct  questions  brought  out  the  fact  that 
she  was  the  young  lady  of  twenty  years  before  who 
had  possessed  so  many  charms  and  excited  so  much 
admiration.  She  had  parted  with  the  companion  of 
her  social  triumphs  when  the  school  days  were  ended, 
and  had  been  sharing  the  fortunes  of  an  unlucky 
man  till  he  died  and  left  her  in  poverty  to  battle 
with  the  world  alone  and  fight  the  grim  fight  for 
the  very  existence  of  herself  and  a  half  dozen  hapless 

175 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

children  whose  ragged  apparel  and  uncared  persons 
attested  too  well  the  tragedy  that  life  had  thrust 
upon  them. 

The  train  of  memories  evoked  by  this  chance  meet- 
ing excited  in  the  mind  of  David  a  curiosity  to 
know  something  of  the  outcome  of  the  young  man 
who  had  stood  by  her  so  valiantly  and  served  her 
with  so  much  gallantry  in  the  dream  life  of  twenty 
years  ago. 

He  had  retired  to  his  native  town  and  buried  him- 
self in  its  meagre  affairs.  His  reputation  had  limited 
itself  to  a  radius  not  to  exceed  three  miles  in  each 
direction.  To  produce  a  few  cabbages  and  cucum- 
bers for  the  summer  market,  and  to  gamer  enough 
food  stuff  to  carry  them  over  the  winter  was  the 
height  of  his  ambition.  Even  a  mole  without  eye- 
sight has  sense  enough  to  do  this.  As  a  social  factor 
he  had  simply  gone  off  the  map. 

I  am  telling  this  not  to  cast  any  reflection  on  the 
time  honored  profession  of  farmer  to  which  I  myself 
was  trained,  but  to  recall  the  huge  bluff  this  young 
man  put  up  with  his  fine  neckties  and  his  small- 
heeled  boots,  and  the  way  he  backed  down  and  re- 
ceded when  society  called  the  bluff  and  demanded 
him  to  make  good.  Every  social  unit  will  stand  for 
its  integral  value  sooner  or  later.    The  bluff  game 

176 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

may  work  for  a  time  but  it  cannot  endure.  Sham 
and  pretense  are  ephemeral  things.  They  melt 
away  before  the  real  facts  of  life  as  the  dews  of  the 
morning  melt  before  the  rising  sun. 

In  contrast  to  these  fine  appearing  people  David 
remembers  a  boy  from  one  of  the  southern  counties 
of  his  native  State  who  came  to  high  school  and  took 
up  his  position  at  the  lowest  point  in  the  social  scale, 
and  began  to  make  his  way.  Of  all  the  forlorn 
hopes  one  can  imagine,  this  boy  seemed  to  have  the 
least  chance.  He  was  clothed  in  homespun  trousers 
and  wore  blue  jumpers  and  overalls  on  every  occas- 
ion, social  or  otherwise.  His  parents  were  poor  and 
he  was  obliged  to  work  as  janitor  for  three  or  four 
hours  out  of  every  day  to  keep  his  board  bill  and 
running  expenses  going.  This  handicap  kept  him 
low  in  his  classes,  but  the  other  boys  and  girls  did 
not  think  of  the  tragedy  that  was  weighing  down 
upon  him  and  retarding  his  progress.  They  re- 
garded him  as  a  dunce  who  belonged  at  the  foot  of 
the  class  by  the  calibre  of  intellect  he  was  born  with. 
And  indeed  he  was  not  a  gem  of  the  first  water  in- 
tellectually, but  he  was  a  plodder  with  a  soul  in  him 
which  had  no  thought  of  defeat  no  matter  how  dis- 
couraging the  outlook.  In  the  silence  of  the  mid- 
night hours  he  plied  his  books  when  all  the  world 

177 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

beside  was  hushed  in  slumber.  And  in  the  dingy 
little  room  with  its  meager  furnishings  where  he 
spent  his  odd  hours  and  rested  for  the  night,  he  dared 
to  dream  dreams  and  build  air  castles. 

Gradually  the  method  of  his  life  began  to  win 
out ;  one  by  one  the  fancy  fellows  who  had  disdained 
him  were  distanced  in  the  race.  It  was  a  repetition 
of  the  old  fable  of  the  tortoise  and  the  hare.  The 
one  mental  characteristic  which  always  wins  out  in 
the  end  is  persistence.  Brilliance  of  mind  is  often 
linked  with  other  conditions  which  completely  nul- 
lify its  effects.  Often  it  is  a  handicap  rather  than 
an  advantage.  But  pertinacity  is  a  winner  every 
time,  even  when  the  odds  seem  hopelessly  against 
it.  Beware  of  the  boy  of  fixed  purpose.  Even 
though  he  may  seem  dull  and  stupid,  some  day  his 
light  will  shine  and  the  world  will  hear  from  him. 
When  the  meteor  flash  of  his  disdainful  fellows  has 
extinguished  itself  and  left  but  the  cinders  and  ashes 
to  mark  its  train,  he  will  be  shining  among  the  fixed 
stars  whose  twinkling  light  goes  on  and  on  forever. 

David  has  watched  the  career  of  this  particular 
young  man,  and  has  seen  his  sphere  of  influence  and 
usefulness  widen  with  the  rolling  years.  Honors 
have  been  conferred  upon  him.  Positions  of  the 
highest    degree    of    responsibility    and   trust    have 

178 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

seemed  to  fall  so  naturally  into  his  way  that  people 
regarded  them  as  his  birthright  and  asked  no  ques- 
tions. Quite  recently  he  was  elevated  to  the  highest 
position  in  the  educational  circles  of  his  native  State 
and  the  honor  descended  upon  him  so  easily,  and  with 
so  little  apparent  effort  that  his  influential  competi- 
tors were  filled  with  amazement. 

His  life  is  pre-eminently  the  vindication  of  the  law 
of  compensation.  While  the  other  young  men  and 
young  women  who  seemed  to  be  so  much  more 
favored  than  he  were  dissipating  their  energies  in 
the  social  whirl,  he  was  laying  the  foundation  in 
silence  and  obscurity  for  that  career  which  was  one 
day  to  lift  him  bodily  out  of  their  class  and  place 
him  on  a  social  and  intellectual  plane  so  far  above 
them  that  they  could  never  hope  to  overtake  him. 
Their  day  of  satisfaction  came  twenty  years  ago. 
They  danced,  and  they  have  had  to  pay  the  piper. 
Their  butterfly  wings  were  ephemeral,  and  when 
they  withered  and  detached  themselves,  there  was 
nothing  left  but  the  dull  grub  which  had  lost  its 
power  of  flight  and  was  doomed  to  creep  and  crawl 
for  the  rest  of  its  natural  life. 

For  David  as  for  every  other  young  man,  the  most 
pertinent  question  that  obtruded  itself  into  his  life 
was  the  choice  of  a  profession. 

179 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

I  am  quite  sure  that  many  successes  and  many 
failures  in  life  are  traceable  to  the  right  or  wrong 
solution  of  this  very  problem.  Among  the  multitude 
of  professional  or  quasi-professional  men  are  many 
who  would  have  been  much  more  successful  as  brick 
masons  or  as  farmers,  and  among  the  toilers  with  the 
hand  are  many  who  have  mental  qualities  undis- 
covered which  would  make  them  famous  if  they  but 
knew  themselves. 

As  I  work  on  this  manuscript  the  newspapers  are 
full  of  the  advertisements  of  a  great  comedian  who 
hails  from  across  the  ocean  and  is  heralded  with  such 
a  reputation  as  a  fun  maker  that  hundreds  of  pyeo- 
ple  are  turned  away  from  the  packed  music  halls 
which  greet  him  in  every  city.  Wealth  has  rolled  into 
his  coffers  as  though  the  touch  of  Alladin's  lamp 
were  at  his  disposal,  and  the  great  and  the  mighty 
of  all  lands  are  clamoring  for  the  chance  to  hear 
him.  The  biographers  of  this  famous  man  tell  us 
that  he  was  a  common  coal  heaver  only  a  few  brief 
years  ago  and  that  he  began  to  attract  attention  by 
singing  to  his  fellow  laborers  as  they  rested  to  eat 
their  lunch  in  the  mid-day.  The  men  from  the 
mines  were  so  enthusiastic  over  his  songs  that  the 
crowds  he  gathered  became  an  incumbrance  to  the 
works  and  his  employers  made  complaint  that  he 

180 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

was  becomng  a  nuisance.  But  Harry  Lauder  did 
not  quit  singing.  He  took  to  the  stage,  with  the 
result  that  he  is  at  this  time  the  highest  paid  pro- 
fessional of  his  class  in  the  world. 

The  fact  that  great  men  in  all  lines  have  tended 
to  come  in  groups  is  an  indication  of  the  influence 
for  development  which  one  mind  possesses  over 
other  minds.  One  man  is  born  with  initiative  enough 
to  break  over  the  barriers  of  traditional  thought,  and 
in  the  effulgence  of  his  light  other  men  discover 
themselves.  There  is  no  doubt  that  what  the  poet 
says  is  literally  true  of  the  flowers  which  waste  their 
sweetness  on  the  desert  air.  The  only  advice  I  have 
to  give  to  the  young  man  who  is  grappling  with  the 
momentous  question  of  the  choice  of  a  life's  profes- 
sion is  that  he  make  it  a  really  serious  problem,  and 
weigh  and  analyze  himself  with  the  philosopher's 
scale  as  though  he  were  deciding  the  problem  for 
some  other  individual.  With  the  most  careful 
scrutiny  of  our  stock  of  mental  materials  we  might 
decide  wrongly.  But  we  are  much  less  likely  to 
do  so  if  we  enter  into  the  problem  with  the  real 
analytic  spirit. 

With  the  close  of  his  high  school  course  our 
David  had  gone  back  to  the  old  farm  and  rested  for 
the  time  being  in  its  infinite  repose.    The  song  of 

181 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

the  bird  and  the  murmur  of  the  brook  were  music 
in  his  ears  as  of  old,  but  the  flowers  of  his  native 
hills,  and  the  spangled  canopy  of  the  night  had  a 
different  meaning  to  him  now.  The  rainbow  of  the 
summer  sky  had  sent  its  message  down,  the  story 
of  the  dimensions  and  distances  of  the  sun  and  the 
moon  and  the  stars  had  been  told.  The  great  laws 
of  the  universe  had  dawned  upon  his  mind.  The 
wonders  of  the  world  had  multiplied  with  his  mental 
expansion.  Religion  had  readjusted  itself  on  a  ra- 
tional basis,  and  the  obligation  of  man  to  his  fellow 
man  had  assumed  serious  proportions  in  his  life. 
Of  all  the  avenues  open  to  me  which  will  enable  me 
to  do  the  most  good  in  the  world?  This  was  the 
problem  which  revolved  in  the  mind  of  the  boy  as  he 
worked  in  the  hay  field  or  traveled  the  unfrequented 
mountain  trails. 

One  morning  when  the  farm  work  was  in  full 
swing,  the  group  of  workers  had  halted  for  break- 
fast, a  letter  was  delivered  into  the  hands  of  David. 
He  opened  it  with  much  curiosity  as  he  sat  in  his 
place  in  the  circle  around  the  camp  fire.  It  was 
written  by  a  committee  which  had  been  appointed 
over  in  the  town  to  get  up  a  big  celebration  for  the 
fourth  of  July,  and  David  was  apprised  that  he  had 
been  chosen  for  the  orator  of  the  day.    With  only 

182 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

two  days  for  preparation,  and  these  to  be  filled  out 
with  the  most  arduous  toil  from  daylight  till  dark, 
there  was  not  much  chance  to  make  the  necessary 
preparation.  But  David  was  glad  of  this  opportun- 
ity, for  none  of  his  kindred  or  acquaintances  of  that 
part  had  known  anything  of  the  struggle  he  had 
made  to  develop  in  public  speaking.  With  some  de- 
gree of  trepidation  he  confronted  the  big  audience  as 
the  master  of  ceremonies  anounced  the  oration  by  the 

honorable  David .    He  seemed  to  have  a  flash 

of  inspiration,  and  acquitted  himself  much  to  his  own 
astonishment  and  satisfaction,  and  to  the  approval 
of  his  auditors  as  judged  by  their  demonstrations. 

Over  the  years  there  comes  down  to  the  recollec- 
tion of  David  only  the  closing  fragment  of  that 
speech.  All  the  rest  of  it  has  gone  into  oblivion. 
But  the  |>eroration  is  one  of  those  detached  crystals 
of  thought  which  maintain  their  form  and  lustre, 
while  all  else  has  vanished  by  the  dissolving  process 
of  the  years.  To  him  this  is  an  indicator  of  the  con- 
text, and  it  has  for  him  the  same  interest  that  all  our 
early  efforts  at  composition  and  oratory  have  for  all 
of  us.  It  brings  back  the  emotion  of  that  palpitating 
morning  when  he  was  mouthpiece  for  the  patriotic 
sentiment  which  filled  the  air.    It  ran  on  this  wise : 

"May  we  each  feel  that  our  country's  honor  is  our 
183 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

own.  May  these  stars  and  stripes  be  the  insignia  of 
honor  and  virtue  in  every  clime  to  which  they  may  be 
carried.  May  the  national  virtue  which  they  repre- 
sent be  perpetuated  for  all  time.  And  when  that 
angel  stands  with  one  foot  upon  the  land  and  one 
upon  the  sea  to  say  that  time  shall  be  no  more,  may 
he  transplant  them  to  the  golden  shores  of  eternity." 

David  went  back  to  his  work  with  a  light  heart. 
He  divined  what  actually  happened  that  this  speech 
would  be  an  opening  wedge  to  gain  him  recognition 
for  the  future. 

It  happened  to  be  the  period  in  his  native  territory 
of  division  on  national  party  lines,  and  people  were 
eager  for  information  on  political  principles.  That 
was  the  period  unique  in  our  experience  when  politics 
had  not  degenerated  into  the  blind  contention  of 
party  before  principle.  Each  citizen  was  eager  to 
know  the  truth  before  making  his  choice  of  the  party 
to  become  affiliated  with.  One  can  imagine  what  a 
boon  it  would  be  to  every  community  if  all  people 
were  to  keep  their  minds  open  for  the  truth  in 
political  matters  as  they  do  in  other  things.  Your 
average  politician  uses  the  argument  which  he  thinks 
will  win  the  approval  of  his  auditors  and  procure 
votes,  with  very  little  regard  for  the  accuracy  of  his 
statements.    He  is  no  unselfish  disseminator  of  the 

184 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

truth  people  require  for  their  guidance.  He  repre- 
sents rather  the  personal  ambition  of  some  man  or 
some  set  of  men  who  are  anxious  to  be  elected.  The 
smooth  shaved  politician  from  the  city  makes  him- 
self the  boon  companion  of  the  farmer  and  the 
laborer  when  he  is  out  to  procure  votes,  but  when 
the  smoke  of  election  day  clears  away  and  the  place 
of  personal  contact  has  shifted  from  the  country  to 
the  city,  his  cordial  bearing  undergoes  a  great  modi- 
fication. 

One  must  be  orthodox  in  politics  if  he 
expects  to  gain  any  of  the  emoluments  which  per- 
tain to  party  affiliation.  But  to  be  orthodox  often 
means  to  lose  your  own  freedom  of  thought.  A 
great  conclave  of  your  party  meets  together  at  cer- 
tain stated  intervals  and  formulates  the  principles 
for  which  the  party  proposes  to  stand.  Some  parts 
of  those  platforms  are  honest,  and  some  parts  are 
cunningly  drawn  for  the  purpose  of  catching  votes. 
The  platform  is  handed  down  to  you,  the  individual 
member  of  the  party,  with  the  statement  implied  if 
not  expressed  that  it  contains  your  thoughts  ready 
made  and  that  you  must  conform  to  them  or  lose 
your  prestige  as  an  advocate  of  the  party.  I  appeal 
from  such  machine-made  principles  and  assert  the 
right  of  the  citizen  to  individual  thought.     Party 

185 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

politics  is  necessary;  I  am  willing  to  let  parties  re- 
cruit their  ranks  from  those  who  are  willing  to  sur- 
render private  opinion  on  the  party  altar  and  to 
think  as  they  are  told  to  think. 

But  we  are  reverting  in  memory  to  that  good  old 
day  when  people  were  seeking  eagerly  for  the  truth 
in  matters  political.  David  had  a  vivid  remembrance 
of  coming  over  from  the  village  to  the  town  as  a 
stripling  boy  and  seeing  his  name  posted  prominently 
on  the  posters  as  the  speaker  of  the  evening,  while 
the  brass  band  paraded  the  streets  to  gather  the 
crowds  together.  One  can  imagine  that  the  sight 
brought  some  satisfaction  to  the  maturing  youth 
who  had  so  recently  in  the  same  streets  been  the 
despised  boy. 

Temporarily  he  accepted  a  position  as  teacher  in 
the  public  schools  for  the  winter  months  to  replenish 
his  depleted  wallet  and  to  prepare  for  the  next  step 
forward.  But  to  his  mind  this  was  never  more  than 
a  temporary  expedient.  It  was  an  occupation  too 
trite  and  commonplace.  It  was  too  much  dependent 
on  temperament.  The  field  was  already  too  much 
exploited. 

The  real  teacher  with  the  instinct  for  his  calling  is 
rather  a  rare  individual  compared  with  the  hundreds 
who  aspire  to  that  function  with  the  thought  gen- 

186 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

erally  of  the  emolument  involved  or  the  social  stand- 
ing appertaining.  The  man  who  is  a  dynamic  mental 
force,  attracting  and  holding  the  attention  of  his 
fellows  by  his  magnetism  and  raising  the  level  of 
mentality  all  around  him,  is  certainly  a  benefactor 
to  his  race.  If  his  bent  is  spiritual  and  his  disposi- 
tion optimistic  and  altruistic,  his  influence  carries 
over  to  succeeding  generations  for  an  indefinite  per- 
iod. But  to  one  such  luminary  there  are  hundreds 
of  satellites  who  are  content  to  follow  the  prescribed 
methods  and  courses,  and  revolve  in  their  fixed  orbits 
without  asking  questions.  They  sell  their  stock  of 
traditional  lore  as  the  grocer  sells  coil  oil  and  sugar, 
never  thinking  of  any  service  other  than  the  cold 
blooded  bargain  of  so  many  hours  for  so  many  dol- 
lars and  cents. 

Between  these  two  extremes  there  are  all  grades 
of  proficiency.  Many  of  the  satellites  even  dare  at 
times  to  quit  their  orbit  and  soar  off  into  space  for 
brief  reconnoitres,  but  they  must  swing  back.  They 
have  not  the  soul  to  explore  new  fields  or  to  initiate 
new  methods.  ^ 

To  be  one  of  the  real  luminaries  of  the  teaching 
profession  would  be  glorious  indeed.  But  the  posi- 
tion is  not  elective.  Such  persons  are  born,  not 
made.    The  average  person  would  have  fifty  chances 

187 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

to  one  against  him  in  this  throw  of  the  dice,  and 
anything  short  of  first  rank  would  not  be  worth 
while.  At  least,  so  thought  the  boy  David  as  he 
weighed  and  considered  the  probabilities  in  the 
case. 

Merchants  and  bankers  in  the  pursuit  of  their 
business  are  cold  blooded,  calculating  folk,  and  very 
little  of  the  humane  element  enters  into  their  transac- 
tions. In  their  way  they  do  good  in  the  world,  but 
the  benefits  they  bestow  are  only  incidental  to  the 
great  issue  of  their  life,  which  is  to  make  dividends 
and  become  rich. 

Lawyers  are  men  of  great  opportunity  so  far  as 
personal  advantage  is  concerned,  and  no  doubt  many 
of  them  have  been  great  benefactors  to  mankind. 
But  it  always  seemed  to  the  boy  David  that  the  legal 
profession,  as  it  works  out  in  actual  practice,  is  a 
perpetual  conspiracy  against  the  integrity  of  the  soul. 
Excuse  it  as  he  will,  the  attorney  who  goes  into  a 
fight  to  establish  the  innocence  of  a  man  whose  hands 
he  knows  to  be  reeking  with  his  brother's  blood,  or 
whose  chattels  he  knows  to  belong  to  another  must 
compromise  his  sense  of  the  highest  rectitude.  And 
then  so  much  of  the  attorney's  duty  consists  in  ferret- 
ing out  the  faults  of  his  fellow  men  and  sounding 
them  from  the  housetop!    So  often  he  must  accuse 

188 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

and  throw  the  energy  of  his  soul  into  the  effort  to 
establish  guilt,  that  he  may  easily  lose  sight  of  the 
obligation  of  mercy  in  his  eagerness  to  establish 
justice,  or  he  might  forget  both  in  his  great  desire 
to  win  the  case.  Altruism  undefiled  has  rather  a  hard 
chance  where  winning  one's  case  is  the  criterion  of 
success  in  life,  and  where  failure  is  inglorious  no 
matter  what  the  condition  of  it. 

Then  it  seemed  to  David  that  the  subject  matter 
of  the  legal  profession  lacked  that  expansile  element 
which  is  characteristic  of  the  scientific  professions, 
Janus-like  it  is  looking  backward  instead  of  forward. 
Its  conclusions  are  based  upon  precedents  from  the 
dead  past.  It  has  none  of  those  great  generalizations 
to  offer  which  have  thrilled  the  world  with  a  Prin- 
cipia  or  a  thesis  on  natural  selection.  Such  research 
possibilities  as  it  can  boast  of  are  among  musty 
parchments  which  record  the  conclusions  of  men  of 
bygone  ages. 

This  objections,  I  ought  to  say,  were  those  made 
by  an  inexperienced  boy,  and  may  be  hastily  and 
inconsiderately  drawn.  He  is  stating  them  not  as 
actual  facts  but  as  arguments  that  came  up  to  him 
in  his  effort  to  choose  a  profession.  The  years  that 
have  since  elapsed  have  brought  to  his  acquaintance 
many  noble  men  who  have  risen  to  eminence  and 

189 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

reflected  credit  on  their  commonwealth  in  spite  of 
all  the  objections  to  their  legal  profession. 

And  David  was  directed  to  the  medical  profession 
by  seeing  all  around  him  people  in  affliction,  who 
were  subjected  to  the  most  irrational  methods  of 
treatment  by  old  women  of  the  villages,  or  by  itiner- 
ant quacks  who  imposed  their  ignorant  deductions 
with  the  boldest  effrontery.  To  see  those  terrible 
life-and-death  struggles  which  came  at  times  to  his 
native  town  depending  for  their  issue  upon  persons 
who  had  not  the  least  knowledge  of  the  fundamentals 
of  medical  science  would  have  been  ludicrous  if 
it  had  not  been  so  tragic  in  its  consequences.  Surely 
here  was  an  opportunity  to  apply  intelligence  and 
humane  effort  to  a  cause  which  had  imperative  need 
of  it.  The  service  of  the  physician  and  surgeon 
seemed  so  direct  and  imminent  in  its  application  and 
often  so  immediate  in  its  consequences,  and  his  life 
seemed  to  come  so  close  to  the  life  of  his  patrons,  that 
David  saw  in  it  an  opportunity  for  the  play  of  all 
those  fine-spun  ideas  of  altruism  he  had  dreamed 
about. 

It  is  true  that  the  other  side  of  the  picture  came 
up  before  him.  He  saw  all  the  shams  and  frauds 
that  are  put  forth  in  the  name  of  medical  science. 
He  saw  the  opportunity  too  often  taken  advantage 

190 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

of  by  unscrupulous  persons  to  impose  unreasonable 
burdens  of  compensation  upon  confiding  patrons,  and 
the  odium  which  fixes  itself  on  the  whole  profession 
as  a  result  of  it.  These  considerations  seemed  so 
weighty  at  one  time  as  almost  to  overwhelm  him. 
But  a  careful  weighing  of  the  problem  convinced  him 
that  the  medical  profession  could  make  a  man  every- 
thing or  nothing.  Its  opportunities  are  not  com- 
parative but  superlative  in  either  direction.  He  be- 
lieved he  had  character  enough  to  place  him  in  the 
class  that  should  choose  the  better  part.  After  all  i: 
is  the  altruistic  motive  which  makes  any  profession  or 
calling  in  life  glorious.  If  we  do  things  because 
we  love  people,  our  pleasure  in  doing  them  will 
augment  as  we  grow  in  capability  to  render  more 
and  better  service,  and  our  satisfaction  in  life  will 
expand  as  we  grow,  and  even  the  tedious  and  disa- 
agreeable  parts  of  our  profession  will  cease  to  be 
irritating  when  love  is  the  motive  which  impels  us 
onward.  But  if  we  develop  the  mercenary  outlook 
on  life  and  measure  out  so  much  cold  blooded  work 
for  so  many  dollars  and  cents,  we  may  ge*-  some 
satisfaction  in  building  up  a  big  reserve,  we  may 
feel  some  of  the  social  and  political  power  which  is 
inherent  in  money,  but  we  shall  never  know  the 
exaltation  of  mind  that  comes  from  rendering  ser- 

191 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

vice  for  the  sake  of  love,  and  receiving  the  grateful 
homage  of  those  we  have  served. 

And  in  the  medical  profession  David  thought  he 
saw  an  opportunity  to  come  near  to  his  fellow  man. 
It  seemed  to  offer  an  outlet  for  the  love  he  felt 
toward  all  people.  It  seemed  to  have  in  it  the  pos- 
sibility of  work  with  the  altruistic  motive.  And  so 
he  made  his  choice  and  began  preparing  for  the  east- 
ward migration  to  take  a  college  course. 

There  is  one  chapter  in  the  life  of  every  normal 
individual  which  demands  consideration,  and  cannot 
reasonably  be  excluded.  That  is  the  chapter  which 
deals  with  the  dawn  of  the  emotions,  and  the  well- 
ing up  in  the  soul  of  those  impulses  which  have  for 
their  ultimate  object  the  selection  of  affinities,  and 
the  linking  together  in  pairs  of  all  such  as  are  will- 
ing to  be  amenable  to  the  great  law  of  nature  mani- 
fest in  the  instinct  of  the  perpetuation  of  the  race. 

It  is  the  great  aggregate  romance  of  nature  that 
human  beings  should  be  born  of  opposite  sexes,  each 
the  complement  mentally  and  physcally  of  the  other, 
and  be  endowed  with  those  instincts  and  impulses 
which  draw  them  together.  For  the  law  of  love  is 
as  imperative  as  the  law  of  gravitation,  and  quite 
as  inexorable  in  its  demands.  There  never  was  a 
human  being,  normal  or  abnormal,  who  did  not  re- 
192 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

spond  in  some  measure  to  this  great  law.  The 
veriest  fag  ends  of  humanity  seem  to  seek  their 
affinities  and  find  mutual  satisfaction  in  their  choice. 
But  when  the  great  impulse  of  nature  takes  hold 
of  people  of  intellect  and  soul,  it  means  more  than 
instinct,  more  than  physical  desire,  more  than  social 
obligation ;  it  means  a  new  heaven  and  a  new  earth 
— an  inspiration  of  poetry,  of  music,  of  valor,  and 
of  all  the  higher  possibilities  of  Hfe.  It  weaves  itself 
like  a  golden  thread  through  the  whole  fabric  of 
history,  and  insinuates  itself  with  emphasis  into  the 
highest  pinnacles  of  attainment.  It  nerves  the  arm 
of  the  warrior,  it  inspires  the  genius  of  the  artist, 
it  whispers  mellifluous  cadences  into  the  ears  of 
the  poet,  it  touches  with  its  magic  power  the  humbl- 
est life,  and  adorns  it  with  thoughts  of  grandeur  and 
nobility. 

And  David  experienced  the  welling  up  of  his 
emotions  at  a  very  early  age  though  his  provincial 
setting  and  his  awkward  person  were  barriers  which 
marked  his  limitations. 

There  is  a  certain  grim  humor  now  in  the  recol- 
lection of  some  of  the  rebuffs  he  received  as  they 
come  over  the  years  and  throw  themselves  upon 
the  screen  of  memory  as  ludicrous  chapters  of  his 
biography  to  be  read  in  lighter  vein  and  interspersed 

193 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

among  the  serious  affairs  of  life.  His  untutored 
imagination  saw  paragons  of  perfection  in  the  girls 
of  his  native  town,  and  when  his  horizon  expanded 
with  the  advent  of  high  school  days  he  was  com- 
pletely over-awed  by  the  aggregate  charms  of  fine 
femininity. 

The  ancient  custom  of  representing  Cupid  as  a 
blind  god  was  not  founded  on  fancy  but  on  actual 
fact.  Twenty  years  with  all  their  changes  have 
demonstrated  that  the  abandon  of  infatuation  known 
to  sentimental  youth  was  founded  upon  the  imagina- 
tion pure  and  simple.  Time  has  played  havoc  with 
the  g^rls  of  twenty  years  ago.  The  peach  bloom 
has  faded  from  their  cheeks,  and  the  frosts  of  the 
years  have  sifted  themselves  among  the  glossy 
tresses.  Weariness  and  insipidity  have  supplanted 
the  buoyancy  that  once  made  them  the  charm  of  the 
ballroom,  and  the  life  of  the  social  evening.  The 
martyrdom  of  motherhood  has  extracted  everything 
from  their  life  of  those  elements  that  used  to  give 
the  electric  thrill  and  drive  men  to  madness.  In  lieu 
of  those  it  has  placed  upon  their  brow  the  crown 
of  resignation  and  enshrined  them  as  the  patron 
saints  of  countless  family  altars.  We  would  not  if 
we  could  reverse  the  process.  The  way  of  nature 
was  wise,  that  they  should  be  withdrawn  from  the 

194 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

lists  of  the  competitors  for  male  preferment,  and 
sequestered  in  the  dominion  of  our  home.  It  is  the 
violation  of  this  law  of  nature  which  casts  its  shadow 
over  the  moral  tone  of  our  highest  civilization.  But 
that  superlative  hour  of  the  emotions  was  necessary 
in  its  time  and  place.  It  is  the  nascent  state  of 
social  molecules  in  which  they  are  forming  combina- 
tions of  the  more  stable  texture  which  fixed  society 
demands. 

David  entered  the  lists  as  contestant  for  one  of  the 
prizes  of  the  neighboring  town,  with  much  dismay 
and  many  forebodings.  The  good  young  men  of  the 
community  who  were  the  social  leaders  had  so  many 
advantages  over  him  that  he  hardly  dared  to  hope 
for  success.  They  were  necks  and  necks  ahead  of 
him  in  the  race. 

The  hopes  and  fears  of  those  days  of  suspense  are 
only  amusing  memories  now,  but  they  were  terrible 
realities  then ;  for  David  was  intensive  in  his  nature, 
and  entered  into  everything  with  all  the  fervor  of 
his  soul.  At  the  first  and  second  laps  he  was  de- 
feated, and  each  time  his  case  seemed  hopeless. 
Back  at  the  farm  he  took  refuge  in  the  old  time 
audible  resolve  that  some  day  she  would  comprehend 
the  meaning  of  his  life,  and  the  realization  of  the 
dreams  he  had  for  the  future.    Each  time  he  made  a 

195 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

new  resolution,  that  the  plan  of  his  life's  work  should 
be  laid  out  upon  such  a  large  scale  that  she  would 
be  completely  overshadowed  in  the  years  that  were 
to  come. 

A  temporary  truce  was  again  ended  by  a  dramatic 
return  of  all  his  letters,  and  an  ultimatum  that 
seemed  final.  Some  treacherous  associate  had  made 
a  false  representation,  and  she  had  acted  on  the  im- 
pulse of  the  moment  without  questioning  the  validity 
of  the  thing  reported. 

How  often  in  life  are  we  defrauded  of  friendships 
which  would  be  priceless  assets  to  us  by  little  mis- 
understandings which  start  us  off  at  an  angle  of 
separation  which  widens  and  widens  as  the  years 
roll  away!  The  hot  impulsive  blood  of  our  youth 
counts  nothing  of  the  cost  of  those  dramatic  ulti- 
matums which  put  friends  out  of  our  circle  forever. 
God  only  knows  the  stories  of  blighted  possibilities, 
of  long  drawn  regrets,  of  heart  aches  unmitigated, 
which  are  strewn  along  the  pathway  of  the  years 
as  a  result  of  these  impetuous  decisions ! 

To  this  last  and  apparently  final  response  David 
deigned  not  to  make  reply.  He  stood  upon  his  honor 
and  his  pride,  and  felt  assured  that  the  years  would 
vindicate  him.  If  she  chose  to  believe  a  lie  without 
investigation  he  would  never  condescend  to  disabuse 

196 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

her  mind.  He  buried  himself  in  his  books  and 
dreamed  great  dreams  for  the  future.  He  resolved 
to  imitate  the  mollusk,  which  repairs  the  wound  in  its 
armor  by  filling  the  gap  with  pearl.  When  the 
winter  days  hung  heavy  and  the  world  without  was 
dark  and  dreary,  he  found  in  the  seclusion  of  his 
room  that  illumination  which  comes  from  within. 
And  when  the  smile  of  springtime  diffused  itself 
over  the  earth, -the  daisy  and  the  buttercup  sprang 
from  the  green  sward,  and  the  bluebird  and  the 
swallow  returned  from  the  land  of  the  south,  he 
walked  forth  alone  and  absorbed  the  poetry  of  the 
hour.    So  he  was  happy  all  the  time. 

Months  rolled  away  in  this  resignation.  She  who 
had  been  the  subject  of  his  dreams  was  moving  in 
other  circles  and  receiving  the  attentions  of  other 
young  men.  But  she  was  not  satisfied  any  more  than 
was  he  with  the  situation.  A  chasm  had  opened 
itself  between  these  two  sensitive  young  people,  and 
the  pride  of  neither  would  bend  to  the  proposal  of 
a  way  to  span  it  over.  They  were  enemies  when 
they  both  wished  to  be  friends.  Only  a  foolish  sense 
of  pride  was  holding  them  asunder. 

One  evening  at  the  close  of  a  religious  service  an 
accident  brought  them  face  to  face.  Then  they  dis- 
covered that  they  were  not  enemies  but  friends.  It 
197 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

was  a  night  bright  with  spangled  heavens  and  a  half 
augmented  moon.  As  they  walked  together  in  the 
commingled  starlight  and  moonlight  the  burden  of 
their  troubles  rolled  away,  and  they  became  happy 
in  the  knowledge  that  each  had  been  laboring  under 
a  delusion  and  that  their  misgivings  of  each  other 
were  of  the  imagination,  pure  and  simple,  without 
foundation  in  fact. 

The  real  emotion  of  the  hour  of  reconciliation  is 
known  only  to  those  of  intensive  natures.  The 
thunderbolt  measures  its  magnitude  by  the  potential 
in  the  two  opposing  clouds  which  produce  it.  The 
greatest  happiness  in  life  often  springs  out  of  the 
greatest  misery,  and  they  who  have  not  learned  how 
to  suffer  can  never  know  the  meaning  of  exultation 
in  its  superlative  degree.  Reconciliation  after  quar- 
rels is  like  sunshine  after  storms.  The  longer  the 
skies  have  been  overshadowed  and  the  elements  dis- 
turbed, the  more  keen  our  appreciation  of  the  rift 
which  lets  the  sunbeam  through.  And  when  the 
great  blue  vault  is  swept  clean  of  all  its  blotches  and 
spreads  its  azure  canopy  unsullied  above  us,  our  thrill 
of  delight  is  intensified  by  remembrance  of  the  dense 
storm  clouds  which  erstwhile  obscured  it. 

The  reconciliation  was  absolute  and  final.    Hence- 
forth David  held  the  fort  against  all  competitors. 
198 


SATELLITES   AND   LUMINARIES 

The  dream  world  of  youth  has  passed  away.  The 
problems  of  life  have  been  met  and  solved  together. 
The  friends  of  bygone  days  are  scattered  like  autumn 
leaves  before  the  wind,  but  the  vow  of  constancy 
which  grew  out  of  those  troubled  days  of  doubt  has 
remained  in  force  unchanged  while  everything  else 
has  changed  about  it. 


199 


CHAPTER  X 

THE   YEARS   THAT    BRING    WISDOM 

AN  unexpected  event  in  the  family  to  which 
David  belonged  had  anticipated  by  one  year 
the  possibility  of  his  advent  to  college.  A  letter  from 
his  father  brought  with  it  from  over  the  ocean  the 
crystallization  of  all  his  hopes  and  dreams. 

David  was  to  arrange  his  affairs  for  the  eastern 
migration,  and  the  early  autumn  was  fixed  upon  for 
the  time  of  his  departure.  Only  they  who  have  gone 
through  a  like  experience  can  appreciate  the  pe- 
culiar ecstasy  that  comes  into  the  mind  of  an  ambi- 
tious boy  when  he  sees  all  the  barriers  swept  away 
which  have  obstructed  his  pathway,  and  beholds  the 
doors  of  the  temple  of  learning  swing  its  portals 
wide  ajar  to  receive  him.  The  days  of  the  interim 
were  full  of  happy  thoughts,  and  the  nights  of  happy 
dreams. 

Of  the  trip  made  alone  to  the  East  David  has  many 
amusing  recollections.  He  was  an  inexperienced 
boy,  and  withal  an  inexperienced  traveler.  Every- 
thing he  encountered  he  looked  upon  with  wonder 
and  amazement. 

200 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

He  had  heard  much  of  the  professional  crooks  who 
infest  the  highways  of  travel  and  flourish  in  the  great 
cities,  and  he  looked  upon  every  stranger  with  eyes 
of  suspicion.  So  he  held  on  grimly  to  his  pocketbook 
whenever  he  came  near  to  anybody.  When  he  had 
ended  the  first  railroad  division,  and  had  to  change 
cars  for  the  next  one,  he  encountered  a  phase  of 
travel  he  had  not  before  heard  of.  In  the  towns  and 
cities  of  his  native  state,  the  railroads  had  never  de- 
manded that  you  show  your  ticket  before  getting  on 
the  train.  There  one's  first  contact  with  railroad 
officials  was  not  until  the  train  was  well  under  way 
and  the  conductor  came  round  to  punch  the  tickets. 

In  the  darkness  of  one  evening  David  alighted  from 
the  incoming  train,  and  regaled  himself  at  the  lunch 
counter,  and  took  his  baggage  in  hand  to  secure  a 
seat  on  the  outgoing  train. 

"Let  me  see  your  ticket,"  was  demanded  in  a  firm 
voice  by  an  individual  standing  at  the  portal  of 
entrance. 

David  said  to  himself,  "Now,  this  is  one  of  the  fel- 
lows I  have  heard  about.  He  wants  to  get  my 
ticket  and  disappear  and  leave  me  in  the  lurch.  So 
he  said.    "No  I  will  not  give  you  my  ticket." 

The  amused  official  said,  "I  guess  you  will  before 
you  get  on  this  train." 

201 


AFTER     TWENTY     YEARS 

And  David  said,  "We  will  see  about  it."  After 
going  the  full  length  of  the  train  and  finding  every 
door  of  every  car  locked  he  was  obliged  to  come 
sneaking  back  and  hand  his  ticket  to  the  suspicious 
character  whom  he  now  recognized  as  a  regularly 
commissioned  employe  of  the  railroad.  It  was  for 
once  a  satisfaction  to  know  that  he  was  all  alone  and 
that  there  was  nobody  he  ever  expected  to  see  again 
to  witness  his  chagrin. 

On  a  detour  through  the  south  land  he  saw  for 
the  first  time  the  great  cotton  plantations  with  their 
groups  of  colored  laborers  bending  over  the  task  of 
gathering  the  snow  white  balls  of  that  staple  product 
to  be  baled  and  shipped  to  northern  factories.  One 
dark  evening  on  the  Tennessee  River  he  saw  also 
for  the  first  time  a  real  steamboat  in  action.  It  was 
a  double  decker,  and  its  bright  lights  illuminated  the 
placid  water  of  the  river  and  the  green  wall  of  over- 
hanging branches  which  fringed  its  shores.  To  one 
who  had  never  before  seen  navigable  water,  this 
huge  aquatic  vehicle  was  a  sight  most  thrilling. 

Of  the  thoughts  and  emotions  that  came  to  the 
inexperienced  boy  in  his  first  contact  with  the  great 
cities  he  has  a  vivid  recollection.  The  glitter  of  the 
lighted  streets,  the  towering  buildings,  and  the  still 
higher  monuments;  the  great  surging  sea  of  hu- 
202 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

manity  which  springs  forth  with  the  dawn  to  inun- 
date the  streets,  and  recoils  with  the  darkness  to  se- 
quester itself  in  the  seclusion  of  hovels  or  mansions ; 
the  wreckage  of  human  beings  left  behind  like  drift- 
wood on  the  pavements,  without  shelter,  without 
food,  without  friends  to  comfort  them;  the  ghouls 
which  haunt  the  back  alleys  and  wallow  like  swine 
among  the  garbage  cans  and  ash  piles,  the  halt  and 
the  lame  and  the  blind,  whose  importunity  is  the 
daily  admonition  for  charity — these  all  were  be- 
wilderingly  new  to  the  boy.  One's  heart  grows 
sick  at  the  thought  of  what  ought  to  be  done  for  re- 
lief and  of  one's  limited  ability  to  do  it.  The  occa- 
sional coin  he  can  afford  to  bestow  is  like  a  drop  of 
water  added  to  the  ocean. 

The  great  areas  of  tenement  houses  where  people 
fester  and  rot  with  filth  and  disease  are  a  blot  on  our 
civilization.  When  our  national  government  learns 
to  take  as  much  care  of  its  citizens  as  it  does  of  its 
sick  hogs  and  sheep,  we  shall  have  taken  a  great 
stride  forward.  The  spots  of  dry  rot  which  our  cities 
contribute  to  the  social  map  are  appreciated  in  their 
full  significance  only  by  provincial  recruits  who  have 
seen  man  as  an  ally  of  nature  develop  into  physical 
perfection  and  moral  stability. 

To  this  boy  with  his  chaste  unsullied  thoughts 
203 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

which  were  the  heritage  of  his  rural  extraction,  the 
sight  of  vice  and  crime  stalking  forth  without  re- 
straint was  most  shocking.  His  life  was  pure  and 
spotless  as  the  great  blue  dome  which  arched  above 
him.  For  the  message  of  the  forest  and  the  wilder- 
ness to  the  unsophisticated  mind  is  one  of  uncon- 
ditional chastity.  Nature,  when  free  to  act,  implants 
the  dreams  of  angels  in  her  children,  and  sends  them 
forth  with  abiding  confidence  in  the  fidelity  of  others. 
Society  is  the  antithesis  of  all  these  angel  dreams. 
The  city  is  a  conspiracy  against  the  honor  of  every 
man  or  woman  who  temporarily  or  permanently 
enters  within  its  precincts.  That  does  not  mean  that 
the  majority  go  wrong,  but  it  does  mean  that  people 
who  are  reared  in  cities  and  have  not  the  regenerat- 
ing influence  of  the  contact  of  nature  in  their  life 
must  needs  compensate  for  it  by  putting  forth  more 
character  to  offset  the  seductive  influences  they  find 
themselves  subjected  to. 

And  here  is  where  religious  training  plays  its  most 
important  role.  How  often  do  we  see  splendid  young 
men  and  young  women,  unsophisticated  in  their 
minds,  pure  as  angels  in  their  thoughts,  go  into  the 
terrible  maelstrom  we  call  the  city  and  be  lost  to  the 
world  forever !  No  sadder  chapter  of  human  exper- 
ience could  ever  be  written  than  that  which  records 
204 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

the  advent  of  inexperienced  young  men  and  young 
women  from  the  country  into  the  life  of  the  city. 
The  accusing  angel  must  blush  as  he  flies  up  to 
heaven's  chancery  with  the  word ;  the  recording  angel 
must  often  blot  the  record  with  tears  of  pity. 

To  his  early  religious  training,  and  the  high  ideals 
of  honor  and  of  moral  duty  instilled  into  his  mind  by 
parents  and  spiritual  advisers  David  accorded  his  full 
measure  of  obligation.  He  felt  himself  proof  against 
temptation  at  all  times  and  in  all  places.  He  saw 
weaklings  lapsing  from  grace  on  every  hand — young 
promising  lives  smitten  by  the  blight  of  vice  and 
crme,  bright  eyes  and  beaming  countenances  blurred 
by  the  inward  consciousness  of  having  fallen,  while 
he  was  able  to  walk  the  royal  way  unscathed,  thanks 
to  the  traditions  of  his  people  and  the  admonition  of 
parents  who  had  fortified  him  for  the  siege. 

It  is  a  strange  paradox  that  in  our  college  courses 
we  give  out  information  on  almost  every  phase  of 
human  life,  except  the  one  vital  thing  which  is  most 
significant  of  all  in  its  bearing  on  individual  happi- 
ness and  social  well  being.  We  teach  our  students 
all  about  the  physical  and  social  conditions  of  the 
barbarians  of  Thibet  and  Timbuctoo,  but  never  a 
word  about  the  great  laws  of  their  own  life  and  the 
transcendency  of  moral  obligation.  Daily,  as  phy- 
205 


'    AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

sicians,  we  meet  men  who  are  versed  in  Latin  and 
Greek  and  calculus  and  the  classics,  who  are  still  on 
the  level  of  the  savage  in  their  moral  conceptions 
and  who  are  paying  the  penalty  for  their  benighted 
condition  by  days  of  suffering  and  nights  of  remorse 
with  the  consciousness  of  loathsome  disease  gnawing 
at  their  vitals,  and  making  them  a  menace  to  the 
generation  in  which  they  live,  and  to  the  third  and 
fourth  generation  that  is  to  follow  after  them.  Con- 
sidering its  present  bearing  and  its  far  reaching 
effect  the  phase  of  ethics  which  deals  with  moral 
purity  should  be  exalted  to  a  prominent  place  in  the 
curriculum.  The  contention  implied,  and  not  infre- 
quently expressed,  that  civilized  men  are  permitted 
by  social  custom  to  descend  to  the  level  of  savages 
in  their  moral  obligations  is  a  blot  on  our  boasted 
civilization.  The  ignorance  that  still  obtains  of  sex 
hygiene  among  our  so-called  educated  classes  is  a 
reflection  on  our  whole  system  of  education. 

To  follow  a  medical  student  through  all  the  vari- 
able experiences  of  his  course  would  be  tedious  work 
and  without  profit  to  compensate  for  the  task.  So 
we  will  get  him  fairly  launched  and  leave  him  to  his 
fate,  until  he  emerges  at  the  end  where  they  turn 
out  the  finished  product. 

The  boy  from  the  farm  finds  himself  confronted 
206 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

with  strange  experiences  on  his  first  advent  into  the 
medical  college.  Full  of  all  that  zeal  and  intensive 
spirit  which  the  new  recruit  brings  from  his  rural  set- 
ting, David  eagerly  pushed  forward  at  an  early  hour 
to  occupy  one  of  the  front  seat  in  the  operating 
theatre.  On  the  morning's  program  came  first  two 
didactic  lectures  which  were  full  of  interest  because 
of  the  strange  subject  matter  they  embraced.  Then 
the  huge  double  doors  of  the  hospital  swung  open 
and  an  ambulating  table  was  rolled  in,  upon  which 
was  placed  the  writhing,  bleeding  form  of  a  man  who 
had  been  liberally  ripped  up  with  a  circular  saw. 
Surgeons  in  white  gowns  soon  came  in  and  began 
removing  some  limbs  and  doing  a  patchwork  of  re- 
pair on  the  others. 

David  felt  a  sensation  creeping  over  him  which  he 
had  never  felt  before.  It  would  be  disgraceful  to 
faint  in  the  presence  of  two  hundred  students,  ready 
to  scoff  and  jeer  at  the  least  intimation  of  it.  But 
how  to  avoid  it  was  a  perplexing  question.  By  dint 
of  determined  will  power  he  continued  to  hold  up 
his  head.  The  aspirations  of  his  life,  however,  were 
for  the  time  being  completely  in  abeyance.  If  ever 
he  got  out  of  that  operating  room  alive,  he  thought, 
he  would  pack  up  his  trunk  and  pull  for  home. 

The  first  contact  with  the  dissecting  rooms  was  a 
207 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

most  revolting  experience.  To  see  human  bodies,  in 
part  or  in  whole,  handled  as  we  handle  merchandise, 
carved  up  like  butcher's  meat,  stowed  away  like 
junk  in  a  curiosity  shop,  or  pickled  in  vats  for  future 
use,  seemed  such  an  antithesis  of  the  old  biblical 
doctrine  of  man  in  the  image  of  his  Creator  that  the 
mind  of  inexperience  had  hard  work  to  harmonize 
the  authority  of  the  scripture  with  the  practices 
of  modem  times. 

It  required  but  a  few  days  of  actual  experience  to 
become  adapted  to  all  the  strange  conditions  of  a 
medical  student's  life.  David  found  himself  fixed 
in  the  laboratories  and  dissecting  rooms  with  a 
'fascination  which  grew  in  intensity  as  the  months 
rolled  away. 

Those  were  the  twilight  days  of  asepsis,  and  many 
of  the  leading  surgeons  were  still  contending  about 
the  role  of  bacteria  in  surgical  fever  and  infected 
wounds.  Naturally  there  were  many  infections  and 
many  'fatalities.  The  last  twenty  years  have  shown 
a  greater  revolution  in  the  science  of  surgery  than 
in  any  other  science,  and  the  changes  continue  to 
come  so  swiftly  that  one  is  soon  left  in  the  rear  if 
he  does  not  visit  often  the  great  centers.  It  has 
become  a  beneficial  factor  in  our  social  system,  res- 
cuing many  unfortunates  from  the  clutches  of  death 
208 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

and  restoring  happiness  and  health  to  lives  that  have 
known  suffering  and  discouragement. 

We  can  with  profit  skip  over  the  routine  work 
of  a  medical  student's  life,  though  many  of  his  ex- 
periences were  novel  and  dramatic.  There  were  days 
of  depression  and  days  of  exultation.  There  were 
duties  that  were  pleasant  and  satisfactory,  and  there 
were  duties  that  required  courage  and  fortitude  in 
their  execution.  Suffice  it  to  say  that  a  day  came 
after  long-drawn  struggles  and  worries .  when  the 
students  all  sat  with  bated  breath  while  a  registrar 
read  from  a  lengthy  paper  the  names  of  the  success- 
full  and  of  the  unsuccessful  candidates  for  the  doc- 
tor's degree,  and  David's  name  was  enumerated  with 
the  list  of  those  who  had  passed  with  credit. 

After  a  few  days  of  relaxation  and  rest  he  settled 
down  to  apply  himself  to  the  clinics,  and  direct  his 
energies  to  the  more  intricate  problems  of  his  chosen 
profession. 

But  a  great  trial  came  into  his  life.  In  the  pursuit 
of  his  duties  among  the  sick  and  afflicted  he  con- 
tracted a  disease  which  brought  him  near  to  death's 
door  and  left  him  a  physical  wreck.  There  was  noth- 
ing left  to  him  but  to  give  up  his  high  ambitions  for 
the  time  being  and  return  to  his  mountain  home. 
This  he  did  as  soon  as  he  had  regained  himself  far 
209 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

enough  to  travel.  The  meeting  with  kindred  and 
friends  was  pleasant  enough  after  his  long  absence, 
though  it  was  a  great  disappointment  to  be  obliged 
to  return  so  soon. 

Each  section  of  this  great  earth  has  its  charms  for 
certain  people,  but  the  one  hallowed  spot  to  all  of 
us  is  the  place  of  our  nativity.  The  soil  that  was 
mingled  with  our  childish  tears  is  sacred  to  us 
forever  afterward,  and  our  minds  turn  instinctively 
back  to  it  as  the  needle  points  to  the  pole.  David 
indulged  the  full  emotion  of  the  home  coming  as  he 
saw  the  contour  of  his  native  hills  loom  over  the 
horizon.  A  few  weeks  of  repose  at  the  old  farm 
again  brought  back  the  color  to  his  cheek,  and  his 
mental  batteries  soon  became  recharged  and  ready 
for  action. 

The  conditions  which  confronted  the  beginning 
physician  of  twenty  years  ago  in  the  country  towns 
were  rather  discouraging,  though  they  had  their 
compensating  features  in  the  development  of  initi- 
ative and  resourcefulness,  which  followed  as  a  reg- 
ular sequence  as  the  bright  outline  of  a  picture  de- 
velops out  of  the  dull  negative.  The  man  who  has 
always  done  his  operative  work  amidst  the  inviron- 
ment  of  first  class  hospitals  with  well-trained  as- 
sistants, would  find  himself  greatly  at  a  loss  if  he 
210 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

were  called  to  operate  in  some  meagre  private  home 
without  help  and  where  everything  had  to  be  impro- 
vised for  the  occasion. 

The  technique  of  twenty  years  ago,  although  based 
upon  the  aseptic,  or  rather  the  antiseptic  plan,  was 
still  far  from  perfection.  In  the  hospitals  men  were 
playing  to  the  galleries  with  a  bizarre  display  of  all 
the  colors  of  the  rainbow  in  their  permanganate  of 
potash  and  oxalic  acid  and  bichloride  of  mercury. 
The  supreme  importance  of  simple  soap  and  water 
had  not  been  appreciated.  Instead  of  trying  to  make 
the  exclusion  of  bacteria  absolute,  surgeons  were 
content  to  permit  a  few  to  enter  their  wounds  and 
then  try  to  kill  them  off  with  antiseptic  drugs. 

The  country  physician  of  twenty  years  ago  was 
like  a  light  upon  a  hill.  If  he  had  a  fatality  in  his 
practice  it  was  heralded  far  and  wide  in  every  direc- 
tion. In  the  country  where  everybody  knows  every- 
body else,  the  news  of  a  mischance  travels  like  elec- 
tricity. But  in  the  city  where  we  hardly  know  our 
next  door  neighbor,  no  such  notoriety  attaches  to  the 
cases  we  fail  to  cure. 

Twenty  years  ago  in  our  country  towns  the 
physician  had  to  fight  his  way  against  the  prejudices 
of  the  people.  His  advent  into  their  communities 
was  an  innovation  which  many  were  inclined  to  look 

211 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

upon  with  suspicion.  To  the  minds  of  many  he 
seemed  to  be  in  league  with  the  powers  of  evil  and 
when  necessity  came,  they  called  him  in  grudgingly 
with  the  thought  that  they  were  capitulating  to  some 
sinister  power  which  they  would  gladly  avoid  if 
possible.  The  ignorance  of  the  old  women  of  the 
village  was  a  sufficient  guarantee  that  they  were  not 
in  league  with  the  Devil.  But  the  young  physician 
who  could  boast  of  a  knowledge  of  anatomy  and 
pathology,  and  gave  a  reasonable  explanation  of  dis- 
ease from  the  material  standpoint  enjoyed  no  such 
exemption.  Many  times  he  was  called  in  at  the  last 
moment  when  everything  else  had  failed,  and  his 
reputation  had  to  suflfer  not  from  his  own  lack  of 
information,  but  from  the  superstitious  dread  of  his 
patrons. 

The  country  physician  had  a  hard  and  sometimes 
a  thankless  lot.  At  any  and  all  hours  of  the  night 
he  was  called  to  brave  the  storms  of  winter  and 
travel  over  roads  which  were  difficult  and  dangerous. 
Often  he  had  many  nights  in  succession  without 
sleep,  and  with  such  food  only  as  he  could  procure 
from  the  poor  farm  houses  and  ranches  that  flanked 
his  way.  In  rickety  old  houses  where  the  wind 
howled  through  the  crevices  he  often  spent  his 
nights,  and  faced  problems  alone  which  tested  his 

212 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

nerve  to  the  utmost.  Not  infrequently  he  made 
long  journeys  through  many  hardships,  paying  his 
hotel  bills  and  livery  bills  by  the  way,  and  receiving 
for  compensation  only  the  promise  of  a  worthless 
wretch  who  never  paid  him  and  never  intended  to 
pay. 

Some  there  were  who  were  unkind  and  never  ap- 
preciated the  service  he  rendered.  Sometimes  he 
was  blamed  and  severely  censured  for  things  over 
which  he  had  no  control,  and  he  had  to  endure  the 
imputation  of  having  motives  in  his  life  which  he 
never  dreamed  of.  Sometimes  they  laughed  to  scorn 
his  altruistic  visions. 

But  there  was  a  positive  side  to  this  picture  which 
furnished  ample  compensation  to  balance  the  account 
with  a  goodly  margin  of  satisfaction  besides.  The 
love  and  respect  of  those  who  did  comprehend  and 
appreciate  was  expressed  with  just  as  much  em- 
phasis as  was  the  disapproval  of  his  enemies.  Almost 
daily  the  mails  brought  boxes  of  flowers  and  other 
tokens  of  the  good  will  of  his  patrons,  and  these 
things  have  more  of  the  real  substance  of  compensa- 
tion in  them  than  anything  else  in  the  world. 

Money,  though  a  necessary  reward  for  our  service, 
is  but  dross  compared  with  the  uncoined  specie  of 
the  human  heart  we  call  appreciation.     What  a  thing 

213 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

it  is  to  have  people  believe  in  you!  The  best,  the 
highest  motives  of  our  Ufe  are  invoked  by  the  faith 
of  others.  We  strive  above  all  things  to  maintain 
ourselves  upon  the  pedestal  where  we  are  placed  by 
our  friends.  The  criminal  at  the  bar  of  justice 
winces  not  at  the  verdict  which  consigns  him  to  the 
gallows  or  to  a  life  of  ignominy  behind  prison  bars, 
but  the  announcement  of  his  crime  in  the  daily  paper 
where  all  his  friends  may  read  about  it  is  the  thing 
that  cuts  him  to  the  quick.  The  opinion  of  our 
fellow  man  is  the  greatest  of  all  the  incentives  in 
Hfe.  It  is  the  force  back  of  the  soldier  when  he  risks 
his  life  amidst  the  hail  of  bullets ;  it  is  the  impulse 
back  of  the  explorer  when  he  penetrates  the  wilds 
of  trackless  continents  or  faces  the  untold  hardships 
of  the  frigid  polar  regions ;  it  is  the  great  all-pervad- 
ing background  of  our  whole  system  of  ethics,  hold- 
ing people  with  its  iron  grasp  to  the  line  of  duty  in 
spite  of  their  weakness  and  in  defiance  of  their 
temptation.  It  demands  concessions  from  the  miser 
whose  yellow  gold  is  m.ore  vital  to  him  than  the  red 
blood  of  his  veins.  Before  its  all-powerful  spell, 
selfishness  bends,  pride  condescends,  and  the  whole 
rank  and  file  of  humanity  lifts  itself  to  a  higher 
altruistic  level. 
And  the  physician  above  all  people  is  influenced 
214 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

by  the  attitude  of  approval  or  disapproval  of  his 
patrons.  The  one  who  expects  him  to  do  so  much 
cold-blooded  work  for  so  many  dollars  and  cents, 
and  comes  to  him  with  fears  and  reservations,  ap- 
peals only  to  the  mercenary  side  of  his  life,  and  will 
be  treated  with  the  same  motive  which  the  grocer 
has  when  he  gives  honest  weight  and  measure  be- 
cause of  the  expediency  of  being  honest.  But  the 
one  who  comes  to  the- physician  in  a  spirit  of  abso- 
lute surrender  and  says,  "I  lay  the  burden  of  my  life 
at  your  feet,  I  have  unbounded  confidence;  give 
forth  only  the  word  and  I  shall  obey,"  is  the  one  who 
makes  a  bid  for  the  sum  total  of  his  manhood,  and 
no  sacrifice  is  too  great  to  compensate  such  confi- 
dence. It  is  to  such  that  the  profession  of  physician 
owes  its  dignity  and  its  exaltation. 

There  is  a  certain  crudeness  about  the  mind  of  one 
who  speaks  of  his  surgeon  as  a  butcher,  and  jests 
about  his  physician  filling  untimely  graves,  which 
the  author  of  these  papers  can  never  tolerate.  The 
butcher,  in  the  harshest,  most  unscientific  way,  severs 
vital  tissues  for  the  express  purpose  of  destroying 
life,  while  the  surgeon,  with  a  minute  knowledge  of 
anatomy  which  has  cost  part  of  his  very  life  to  ac- 
quire, makes  the  necessary  readjustments  of  our 
body  with  a  precision  that  is  born  of  the  full  con- 
215 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

sciousness  of  the  sacredness  of  that  life  before  God, 
resolving  each  time  to  do  his  utmost  to  preserve  and 
not  destroy  that  which  has  been  entrusted  to  his 
care.  The  physician  who  has  the  instinct  of  his 
calling  enters  into  the  real  spirit  of  every  bedside 
tragedy  that  confronts  him,  making  common  cause 
with  all  those  who  are  hanging  breathless  on  the 
issue.  He  exults  with  them  in  the  hour  of  victory 
and  mingles  his  tears  with  theirs  in  the  hour  of  de- 
feat. He  is  willing  to  endure  every  hardship  that 
his  patrons  may  have  the  full  measure  of  his  potency, 
and  that  his  conscience  may  be  satisfied  that  in  the 
work  of  each  day  he  has  met  loyally  the  sacred  con- 
fidence which  was  imposed  in  him  and  done  his  full 
duty.  I  am  painfully  aware  of  the  fact  that  phy- 
sicians and  surgeons  are  not  invariably  men  of  the 
class  here  indicated.  There  are  unscrupulous  men 
in  all  professions.  The  urgency  of  the  need  of  sick 
people  for  help  gives  opportunity  for  the  man  with- 
out a  conscience  to  take  advantage  of  the  confidence 
too  easily  imposed  in  him.  Human  vultures  there 
are  in  all  departments  of  life — men  who  delight  in 
the  importunities  of  their  fellow  men  for  the  ad- 
vantage it  offers. 

But  I  speak  of  the  rank  and  file  of  the  profession, 
and  class  them  without  hesitation  as  men  with  an 
216 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

altruistic  motive,  and  many  of  them  as  real  philan- 
thropists. They  are  not  as  a  rule,  sounding  a  trum- 
pet when  they  do  charitable  things,  but  untold  thou- 
sands of  people  of  each  generation  can  bear  testimony 
to  their  devotion  to  the  cause  of  the  poor  and  the 
needy.  Boorhave,  the  greatest  physician  of  the  late 
mediaeval  period,  used  to  say,  "I  like  to  treat  poor 
people,  for  God  is  their  paymaster."  In  the  great 
cities  of  Europe  are  individual  men  who  number 
their  charity  patients  by  the  thousands,  and  they  are 
moving  in  the  even  tenor  of  their  way,  and  render- 
ing this  colossal  service  with  hearts  full  of  love  and 
compassion. 

Like  all  other  people,  the  men  of  the  medical  pro- 
fession have  to  bear  the  odium  of  the  unsavory  name 
of  the  worst  element  of  their  calling.  The  penumbra 
around  the  borders  of  the  real  domain  of  medical 
science  is  peopled  by  a  motley  group  of  mountebanks 
and  frauds  and  pretenders  who  are  weaving  spider 
webs  of  all  sizes  and  descriptions  to  entangle  the 
unwary  and  victimize  the  over-credulous  multitude. 

Knowing  the  psychology  of  bold  assertion,  they 
are  indulging  in  the  most  extravagant  claims,  and 
professing  with  brazen-faced  effrontery  to  do  things 
which  are  plainly  impossible.  Their  name  is  legion, 
and  in  each  succeeding  generation  they  put  forth  a 

217 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

new  front  to  meet  the  popular  demand  for  delusion. 
Though  they  group  themselves  together  into  many 
diverse  cults,  they  have  one  motive  which  is  common 
to  them  all — the  substitution  of  actual  knowledge  of 
medicine  and  surgery  by  some  absurd  theory  of  the 
nature  and  cause  of  disease. 

It  is  a  wonderful  thing  in  this  world  of  ours  that 
there  is  such  a  multitude  of  people  who  seek  dark- 
ness rather  than  light,  and  who  cleave  to  error  rather 
than  truth.  The  medical  profession  at  all  times  and 
in  all  places  has  been  beset  by  delusions  which  have 
often  been  so  gross  and  palpable  as  to  call  in  question 
the  sanity  of  the  multitudes  who  have  believed  in 
them.  Ancient  errors  have  cast  their  shadow  far 
into  the  daylight  of  modern  times.  From  the  cure 
of  scrofula  by  the  king's  touch,  which  is  less  than  a 
century  old,  through  the  fallacy  of  Perkins'  tractors, 
and  the  imaginary  power  of  infinitesimal  divisions 
of  medicines,  down  to  the  negation  of  all  diseases  by 
the  Christian  Science  cult,  we  have  a  chain  of  delu- 
sions which  connects  us  up  with  the  chimeras  of  the 
middle  ages.  In  all  other  departments  of  life  super- 
stition runs  its  course  and  comes  to  its  natural  end- 
ing. But  in  medical  matters,  the  delusion,  when  it 
meets  with  stern  facts,  instead  of  capitulating,  sim- 
ply shifts  its  base,  puts  on  a  new  front  and  goes  on 
218 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

as  if  nothing  had  happened.  The  king's  touch  is 
no  more,  Perkins'  tractors  have  gone  by  the  way, 
homeopathy  is  weak  and  tottering,  but  Christian 
Science  is  flourishing  with  more  vigor  than  any  of 
them,  and  embracing  in  its  fold  not  only  the  vulgar 
and  ignorant,  but  the  educated  and  refined. 

As  a  counter  balance  against  all  this  delusional 
phase  of  our  great  profession  and  the  disgusting 
spectacle  of  people  being  duped  and  imposed  upon, 
there  is  great  satisfaction  in  the  wonderful  strides 
medicine  and  especially  surgery  is  making.  Twenty 
years  have  meant  a  revolution  in  this  science  and  art. 
Old  theories  have  been  so  rapidly  submerged  in  the 
rising  tide  of  enlightenment  that  it  is  hard  to  keep 
one's  balance.  The  light  of  the  modern  day  has 
penetrated  so  many  dark  recesses  that  one  wonders 
if  any  great  problem  will  remain  unsolved.  Twenty 
years  ago  we  were  in  the  twilight  of  our  knowledge 
of  bacteriology  and  its  relationship  to  disease.  There 
were  men  of  eminent  standing  who  would  not  accept 
the  germ  theory,  and  who  always  contended  against 
it  to  the  day  of  their  death. 

Twenty  years  ago  antiseptic  surgery  was  still  the 
dominating  thing  and  the  carbolic  acid  spray  which 
poisoned  surgeon  and  patient  alike  was  still  in  evi- 
dence.    The    author  of  these  papers  has  a  vivid 

219 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

memory  of  seeing  operators  in  frock  suits  handling 
alternately  the  bones  of  the  skeleton  and  the  instru- 
ments with  which  he  was  about  to  cleave  them  on 
the  living  subject  as  he  disported  himself  in  hilarious 
dissertations  before  the  admiring  throng  of  medical 
students  who  never  failed  to  be  present  at  the  sur- 
gical clinic.  In  those  days  some  bold  surgeons  ven- 
tured to  open  the  abdominal  cavity,  and  worked  with 
bated  breath  to  get  out  of  it  as  quickly  as  possible, 
leaving  always  behind  drainage  tubes  to  be  subjected 
to  suction  at  stated  intervals,  in  the  hope  that  by  this 
means  peritonitis  would  be  averted. 

The  great  world-wide  controversy  over  appen- 
dicitis has  been  mostly  within  the  last  twenty  years. 
The  graphic  combination  of  symptoms  which  the 
trained  surgeon  of  the  present  day  can  interpret  over 
the  telephone  as  the  certain  indicators  of  that  ubiqui- 
tous malady,  were  variously  believed  to  be  the  symp- 
toms of  four  or  five  different  imaginary  diseases. 
The  surgeon  when  confronted  with  the  classic  symp- 
tom complex  which  the  laity  of  this  day  have  learned 
to  interpret,  could  take  his  choice  between  typhlitis, 
paratyhlitis,  perityphlitis  and  appendicitis.  Early 
operation  was  unheard  of.  Always  the  surgeon 
waited  for  an  abscess  to  form  before  he  thought  of 
interfering,  and  the  mortality  of  that  dreaded  disease 
220 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

was  appalling.  It  is  no  wonder  that  people  insisted 
on  making  their  will  before  being  operated  on  for 
appendicitis.  The  issue  very  frequently  vindicated 
the  wisdom  of  that  extreme  precaution.  At  the 
present  day  the  only  great  worry  is  that  the  case  will 
be  delayed  into  the  dangerous  period.  Early  opera- 
tion in  skillful  hands  is  almost  always  successful. 
To  American  surgery  is  due  the  credit  for  this  great 
victory. 

Twenty  years  ago  the  operation  for  goitre  was 
such  a  formidable  thing  that  only  the  boldest  sur- 
geons would  undertake  it,  and  the  mortality  was 
appalling.  At  the  present  time  the  most  critical 
cases  of  that  fearful  malady  are  so  skillfully  managed 
by  the  well  trained  surgeon  that  patients  are  rescued 
from  their  peril  with  comparatively  little  danger. 

Twenty  years  ago  the  human  stomach  was  one 
terra  incognita  from  the  surgeon's  viewpoint.  Ulcer 
and  cancer  of  the  stomach  were  permitted  to  run 
their  dreaded  course  unchallenged.  The  author  of 
these  papers  has  a  vivid  picture  in  his  memory  of  the 
agonizing  symptoms  which  an  ulcer  of  this  important 
organ  produces. 

My  father  was  afflicted  with  it  for  many  years, 
and  finally  died  as  a  result  of  its  complications. 
Nobody  even  knew  in  that  day  what  was  the  matter 

221 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

with  him,  though  the  clinical  picture  as  it  comes 
down  in  memory  was  so  clean  cut  and  precise  that 
there  could  be  no  question  of  its  meaning.  He  lived 
almost  to  the  time  of  surgical  relief  and  passed  out 
just  in  the  twilight  hour  of  stomach  surgery.  Ten 
years  later  he  could  easily  have  been  cured  by  an 
operation  which  would  have  involved  very  little  risk. 
If  I  could  but  turn  the  dial  hand  of  time  backward 
twenty  years  and  render  to  him  who  had  done  so 
much  for  me  the  relief  which  surgical  science  of  this 
day  and  age  could  easily  bestow,  it  would  be  one  of 
the  greatest  satisfactions  of  my  life. 

Cancer  of  the  stomach  is  attacked  in  these  days  the 
same  as  cancer  of  any  other  organ.  In  its  early 
stages,  the  outlook  after  thorough  removal  is  better 
than  it  is  when  the  involvement  is  of  any  other  vital 
organ.  Armed  with  his  full  array  of  sterilized  linen 
and  rubber  gloves,  the  surgeon  invades  abdominal 
and  brain  cavities  with  little  fear  of  consequences. 
He  boldly  attacks  the  prostrate  gland  and  removes  it 
instead  of  consigning  its  victims  to  certain  death,  as 
was  the  case  twenty  years  ago. 

Diphtheria  at  that  time  had  a  mortality  of  forty  to 
fifty  per  cent,  and  sometimes  whole  families  of  chil- 
dren were  swept  away  by  its  ravishes.  With  the  aid 
of  the  modem  antitoxine  it  is  so  robbed  of  its  terror 
222 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

that  people  no  longer  fear  it.  The  only  trouble  the 
physician  of  this  day  has,  is  to  make  people  believe 
afterward  that  they  really  had  diphtheria.  They  are 
cured  so  quickly  that  they  are  left  in  doubt  as  to  the 
correctness  of  the  diagnosis. 

Twenty  years  ago  the  physician  used  to  delight  in 
giving  huge  doses  of  medicine,  often  compounding 
half  a  dozen  remedies  into  the  same  prescription, 
expecting  in  that  way  to  meet  each  individual 
symptom  the  patient  complained  of  and  offset  them 
all  at  once  by  the  appropriate  antidote.  To  make 
these  polyvalent  mixtures  palatable  was  considered 
to  be  an  art  worthy  of  much  attention. 

To-day  we  have  learned  that  almost  all  of  the 
acute  infections  are  self-limited  and  will  cure  them- 
selves if  we  but  give  nature  a  chance  to  assert  itself. 
The  Creator  has  provided  in  our  bodies  the  means 
of  our  own  cure.  Whenever  a  poison,  whether  chem- 
ical or  bacterial  comes  into  our  system,  the  body  cells 
begin  forthwith  to  manufacture  the  antidote  of  it, 
and  as  soon  as  they  produce  enough  antidote  to  neu- 
tralize all  the  poison  present,  we  get  well.  The 
symptoms  of  disease  are  the  manifestations  of  a 
poison  that  the  disease  germs  are  pouring  into  our 
blood.  The  fever  and  pain  and  loss  of  appetite  are 
indicators  of  the  amount  of  poison  we  are  receiving, 

223 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

and  of  our  individual  resistance  to  it.  The  body 
cells  throw  themselves  with  great  energy  into  the 
task  of  manufacturing  the  particular  antidote  re- 
quired, and  when  they  have  produced  enough  of  it 
to  neutralize  all  the  poison  present,  we  reach  the 
crisis  of  the  disease  and  begin  to  recover.  Some- 
times, as  in  acute  pneumonia,  the  crisis  comes  sud- 
denly, when  the  whole  picture  is  changed  in  a  few 
hours  from  one  of  great  distress  and  danger  to  one 
of  comfort  and  perfect  safety.  Sometimes  the  end 
is  not  so  dramatic,  but  the  struggle  between  invading 
bacteria  and  the  cells  of  the  body  is  drawn  out 
through  many  days,  and  often  through  many  weeks, 
and,  when  the  issue  is  finally  decided,  the  patient  is 
left  a  wreck  of  his  former  self,  requiring  months  to 
regenerate  his  depleted  tissues. 

But  every  case  of  acute  infection  involves  the  same 
antagonistic  issue  bet  ween. poison-producing  bacteria 
which  have  established  their  colonies  somewhere  in 
the  body,  and  the  defensive  tissue  cells  which  engage 
themselves  in  a  life-and-death  struggle  to  neutralize 
the  poison  which  would  otherwise  destroy  them. 

And  it  is  the  recognition  of  this  great  law  of  na- 
ture which  has  completely  changed  our  attitude  to- 
ward disease  and  pointed  out  the  way  of  the  future 
development  of  medical  science.  We  no  longer  im- 
224 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

agine  that  we  keep  antidotes  corked  up  in  bottles  on 
the  apothecaries'  shelves,  but  we  realize  that  we  must 
get  in  league  with  nature,  make  our  efforts  to  accel- 
erate her  processes,  and  prevent  them  from  being 
impeded. 

In  some  diseases,  such  as  diphtheria  and  hydro- 
phobia and  tetanus,  science  has  penetrated  into  the 
domain  of  nature's  laboratory,  and  learned  some  of 
her  processes,  but  she  had  been  loath  to  give  up  her 
secrets.  Acquired  immunity  has  offered  many  baf- 
fling problems,  but  the  encroachment  upon  it  which 
each  year  of  determined  effort  is  making,  augurs 
well  for  the  future.  We  know  that  each  self-limited 
infection  involves  the  same  process  of  antidote-pro- 
duction. W'e  know  that  there  is  a  great  law  of  self- 
preservation  established  by  the  Creator  in  our  bodies, 
to  work  automatically  whenever  danger  impends. 
Each  acute  infection  lasts  a  variable  period,  until 
this  law  has  a  chance  to  assert  itself,  when  it  recedes 
and  leaves  behind  only  the  depleted  vitality  which  re- 
sulted from  the  struggle.  We  know,  furthermore, 
that  the  antidote  which  nature  produces  to  cure  the 
acute  infection  becomes  in  general  a  fixed  quantity 
which  prevents  us  from  acquiring  the  same  disease 
in  the  future. 

Along  some  lines  we  have  been  able  to  unravel  a 
225 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

part  of  the  mystery  of  acquired  immunity.  We  have 
discovered  segments  of  the  circle,  which  some  day 
in  the  future  are  to  be  joined  together  in  perfect 
symmetry."  The  medical  profession  at  the  present 
juncture  is  sadly  in  need  of  one  of  those  generalizing 
intellects  which  have  apeared  so  often  in  the  world 
of  science,  to  group  all  the  fragments  of  accumulated 
knowledge  into  a  system  and  initiate  a  new  epoch. 

The  last  half  century  and  particularly  the  last 
twenty  years  have  produced  such  splendid  results 
that  we  have  all  hope  for  the  future.  The  practical 
application  of  Listerism,  Roentgen  rays,  antitoxine, 
and  the  enormous  development  of  technique  which 
has  lifted  surgery  into  the  domain  of  the  exact  sci- 
ences, are  but  the  accumulated  daily  bulletins  of  the 
last  twenty  years.  The  one  great  burning  question 
of  the  hour,  which  has  proved  itself  more  stubborn 
than  all  the  rest,  is  that  of  the  explanation  of  cancer. 
Not  even  a  glimmer  of  light  has  come  from  this  dark 
field  of  research. 

But  we  are  digressing  too  far.  We  are  to  go  back 
to  the  position  of  the  country  doctor  of  twenty  years 
ago. 

He  was  obliged  to  do  such  operating  as  he  did  do 
in  private  homes,  utilizing  the  domestic  furniture 
for  his  equipment.     The  table  he  placed  his  patient 

226 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

on  was  often  the  one  which  served  as  dining  table  for 
the  family.  The  cooking  utensils  were  variously  em- 
ployed to  sterilize  his  instruments  and  dressings. 
Often,  he  had  to  stand  in  the  way  like  the  angel  with 
the  flaming  sword  before  the  garden  of  Eden,  to 
prevent  his  multitudinous  lay  visitors  from  soiling 
his  linen  or  contaminating  his  instruments.  As  many 
people  as  could  pack  into  the  room  would  crowd  in 
and  the  windows  were  darkened  by  the  heads  of 
inquisitive  spectators.  Not  infrequently  one  and 
sometimes  a  number  of  these  people  would  fall  in  a 
faint  while  the  operation  was  in  progress.  Denied 
the  help  of  trained  nurses  or  assistants,  the  country 
doctor  had  to  utilize  his  neighbors  as  best  he  could 
to  render  such  assistance  as  was  imperatively  de- 
manded during  the  progress  of  his  operation.  To 
have  one  farmer  giving  the  anaesthetic,  and  another, 
scrubbed  up  and  dressed  with  a  mother-hubbard 
apron,  to  hand  him  his  instruments  and  hold  retrac- 
tors, was  an  experience  common  to  the  rural  prac- 
titioner of  twenty  years  ago.  A  surgeon  who  has 
since  risen  to  eminence  told  me  of  an  occasion  when 
he  was  amputating  a  leg  under  circumstances  of  this 
kind.  In  the  midst  of  the  procedure  it  was  an- 
nounced that  the  roof  of  the  house  was  on  fire. 
Whereupon  the  doctor  divided  his  forces  and  sent 
227 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

part  of  his  farmer  allies  to  extinguish  the  flames, 
while  he  with  the  rest  of  them  went  on  with  the 
operation.  In  spite  of  dust  and  smoke  and  cinders, 
and  the  questionable  asepsis  of  the  hands  of  men  who 
had  done  only  the  hard  work  of  the  farm,  the  wound 
healed  well  and  the  patient  made  a  good  recovery. 

I  wish  to  pay  my  tribute  of  respect  to  the  good 
people  who  came  to  our  assistance  in  these  emergen- 
cies. It  is  surprising  how  much  common  sense  there 
is  in  the  make-up  of  the  average  individual  of  the 
laboring  classes  when  we  take  pains  to  call  it  into 
action.  The  denizen  of  the  city  who  imagines  that 
there  is  no  refinement  and  no  soul  outside  of  his 
urban  precincts  has  but  a  limited  outlook  on  life. 
Take  from  him  the  thin  veneer  of  polish  which 
comes  from  the  attrition  of  social  contact,  and  he 
bears  no  comparison  with  his  brother  who  has  been 
tutored  in  the  school  of  nature,  and  had  his  instincts 
developed  along  wholesome  lines.  The  fine  abandon 
with  which  these  people  take  up  the  cause  of  their 
neighbors  when  in  affliction,  and  enter  into  the 
real  tragedy  of  their  life,  making  all  kinds  of  sacri- 
fices when  occasion  demands  it,  without  thought  of 
compensation  or  reward,  reflects  a  spirit  of  fraternal- 
ism  which  is  unknown  to  the  wealthy  classes  gen- 
erally or  to  the  residents  of  cities.  When  the  phy- 
228 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

sician  had  to  make  a  journey,  in  those  days,  to  reach 
his  patient  or  was  obliged  to  render  continuous  ser- 
vice for  some  hours  in  a  household,  the  good  matron 
would  put  herself  to  great  inconvenience  to  provide 
him  with  the  best  food  and  the  most  comfortable 
quarters  her  home  could  furnish.  But  in  the  cities 
the  physician  is  called  in  much  as  the  plumber  or  the 
carpenter  is  called.  He  is  expected  to  look  out  for 
his  own  entertainment.  And  if  his  service  continues 
beyond  the  breakfast  hour  he  indulges  in  a  fast  day 
until  his  task  is  ended.  Our  social  methods  of  the 
city  boast  of  much  more  refinement,  but  they  do  not 
always  bring  the  greatest  amount  of  comfort  possible 
into  our  lives.  Each  phase  of  life  has  its  compensa- 
tions. If  we  draw  the  balance  we  may  find  that 
there  is  not  so  much  difference  in  the  sum  total  of 
advantages  in  the  country  and  in  the  city  as  we  might 
imagine. 

The  country  physician  of  twenty  years  ago  was, 
as  a  rule,  the  only  practitioner  in  his  respective  town. 
He  had  nobody  to  share  his  worries  and  responsi- 
bilities with,  and  nobody  to  join  him  in  consultation 
when  his  cases  were  perplexing  and  difficult.  The 
author  of  these  papers  has  vivid  recollections  of 
times  when  he  felt  that  the  burdens  of  the  world 
were  upon  him.     How  often  he  looked  up  at  the 

229 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

great  red  cliff  that  flanked  his  native  town,  and 
weighed  his  Ufe  with  all  its  anxieties  against  the 
record  of  this  stupendous  book  of  time  until  he 
seemed  but  a  mote  in  the  sunbeam,  and  his  worries 
and  perplexities  but  momentary  incidents  in  the 
great  world  process.  The  aeons  were  a  consolation 
to  his  troubled  soul,  and  the  untold  centuries  shed 
their  mantle  of  peace  upon  him. 

The  country  physician  naturally  entered  into  all 
the  social  and  political  activities  of  his  community, 
and  lived  the  real  life  of  the  people  he  associated 
with.  When  he  was  unwise  enough  to  take  a  strong 
partisan  stand,  and  announce  himself  with  too  much 
emphasis  against  the  party  which  opposed  him,  it 
made  a  division  in  his  patronage  and  alienated  many 
whose  loyalty  would  have  continued  to  be  a  great 
advantage.  The  physician  who  depends  on  all 
creeds  and  parties  for  his  patronage  has  no  more 
business  mixing  in  partisan  strife  than  has  the  prom- 
inent church  man,  who  cannot  afford  to  have  his 
flock  divided  against  him. 

The  physician  who  really  became  a  moving  force 
in  a  community  naturally  met  with  that  opposition 
which  obstructs  the  way  of  all  those  who  do  things. 
If  you  are  content  to  be  a  dead-head  and  do  a  tread- 
mill business  forever,  you  can  be  assured  of  the  con- 
230 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

solation  that  nobody  will  oppose  you  or  say  hard 
things  about  you.  But  whenever  you  begin  to  move 
out  of  the  pace  which  has  been  set  by  the  average 
citizen,  you  will  produce  friction,  and  the  more  rapid 
your  strides,  the  greater  will  be  the  opposition  you 
will  encounter.  The  meteor  which  has  come  to  rest 
upon  the  mountain  side  is  cool  and  opaque  as  the 
country  boulders  which  lie  all  around  it.  But  when 
it  was  in  action  in  its  transit  from  the  sidereal  depths 
to  the  earth's  surface,'  the  resistance  it  encountered 
in  ether  and  atmosphere  were  sufficient  to  raise  its 
temperature  to  the  point  of  incandescence.  When 
one  develops  philosophy  enough  to  comprehend  that 
the  opposition  of  his  fellows  is  but  the  working  out 
of  a  sociological  law  which  is  common  to  all  times 
and  all  places  and  all  people,  he  will  cease  to  think 
of  his  opponents  as  deliberate  persecutors.  That 
very  resistance  which  society  collectively,  and  some 
individuals  particularly,  are  throwing  in  your  way 
will  do  more  to  develop  your  initiative  and  bring  out 
the  latent  elements  of  your  soul  than  any  other  one 
thing  in  the  world.  Thank  God,  then,  for  the  ob- 
structionist. He  is  an  asset  which  comparatively 
few  of  the  rank  and  file  of  society  have  the  privilege 
of  claiming  as  an  individual  possession.  He  and  his 
kind  are  the  negative  of  a  picture  from  which  is  to  be 

231 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

produced  the  clean-cut  outlines  of  your  personality 
one  day  in  the  future — of  that  personality  which  is 
not  described  in  terms  of  form  or  color,  but  in  the 
aggregate  of  all  those  soul  characteristics  which  en- 
ter into  the  make-up  of  a  God-like  man. 

We  are  all  prone  ito  think  too  seriously  of  the  hard 
things  that  are  said  of  us.  When  a  man  is  working 
with  all  conscience  and  making  untold  sacrifices  for 
his  patrons  and  his  friends,  it  seems  such  a  wicked 
thing  that  people  should  put  evil  into  his  life  that 
he  has  never  dreamed  of,  and  impute  motives  to  him 
which  are  known  only  to  people  of  the  basest  kind. 
But  when  he  rises  to  the  philosophical  view-point 
and  comprehends  that  the  very  people  who  say  those 
things  do  not  beUeve  them,  but  are  attempting  in  this 
way  to  fill  in  the;  gap  with  some  measure  of  plausi- 
bility between  your  success  and  their  failure,  the 
whole  thing  has  a  different  significance.  We  are 
advertised  much  more  by  our  enemies  than  by  our 
friends.  If  you  shake  the  tree  you  scatter  its  seeds 
abroad.  From  the  darkest  cloud  springs  the  most 
vivid  gleams  of  the  forked  lightning,  as  from  the 
darkest  picture  of  calumny  comes  forth  the  elements 
of  human  character  which  indicate  the  Divinity  of 
our  pedigree. 

The  lives  of  Martin  Luther,  of  Savonarola,  and 
232 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

of  Jesus  of  Nazareth  were  all  intensified  by  the  dense 
negative  which  was  produced  by  their  detractors. 
We  would  not  have  known  the  Sermon  on  the  Mount 
if  it  had  not  come  as  the  antithesis  of  the  lives  of 
those  who  traduced  its  author. 

It  is  said  that  physicians,  and  especially  country 
physicians,  are  prone  to  develop  alcoholism  and  the 
drug  addictions.  I  believe  there  is  some  measure  of 
truth  in  this,  and  perhaps  some  measure  of  justifica- 
tion, when  we  consider  the  hardships  they  have  to 
endure  and  the  disappointments  which  are  incident 
to  their  lives.  In  all  walks  of  life,  rectitude  is  but 
a  relative  thing.  No  human  being  ever  lives  the  life 
in  actual  practice  which  he  holds  in  his  conscious- 
ness as  the  ideal.  But  when  we  pass  in  judgment 
upon  a  man's  virtues  we  do  not  stop  to  think  of  the 
temptations  he  has  resisted.  We  expect  him  to  walk 
faultless  where  we  ourselves  might  falter. 

Temptation  was  placed  in  the  world  that  we 
might  grow  strong  by  resisting  it.  And  they  who 
develop  the  greatest  strength  are  they  who  have 
known  the  greatest  temptation.  Do  not  think  that  you 
have  known  virtue  until  you  have  walked  the  ragged 
edge  of  fate  and  seen  hell  yawning  at  the  bottom. 
When  you  feel  your  feet  secure  far  back  from  the 
precipice,  you  appreciate  the  poise  and  the  renewed 

233 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

strength  which  that  agonizing  hour  brought  into 
your  life.  The  palsied  virtue  of  disuse  is  not  virtue 
at  all.  It  is  like  the  palsied  muscle  which  fails  us  on 
the  first  occasion  when  its  strength  is  required  to 
meet  some  emergency.  Not  in  passive  indifference, 
but  in  real  life-and-death  struggles,  does  nature  deal 
out  her  admonitions  which  make  us  grow  strong  and 
valiant.  Everything  in  this  world  is  balanced  against 
its  antithesis.  If  we  covet  the  big  things  in  life,  and 
desire  to  possess  the  attributes  of  character  which 
stand  not  in  a  passive  but  in  an  active  relationship 
to  the  world's  great  problems,  we  must  be  willing  to 
pay  the  price  which  God  has  set  upon  them.  The 
mere  drifter  may  get  some  of  the  satisfaction  which 
comes  by  the  pull  of  gravity  that  directs  him  always 
to  a  lower  level,  but  only  to  him  who  is  willing  to 
stem  the  current  and  ascend  by  force  the  rugged 
channel  of  the  river  will  open  up  the  vista  of  the 
sublime  heights  where  all  things  have  their  source. 

An  account  of  the  experiences  of  the  successful 
country  doctor  and  the  conditions  and  problems  he 
had  to  meet  is  an  epitome  of  the  life  of  him  whose 
fortunes  we  have  been  following.  David  sounded 
the  depths  and  shoals  of  human  experience.  He 
knew  the  exultation  of  victory ;  he  knew  the  depres- 
sion of  defeat.  In  the  hard  school  of  experience  he 
234 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

was  tutored.  Sometimes  his  disappointment  was  so 
great  that  he  felt  that  all  was  lost  and  that  he  must 
acknowledge  failure.  Sometimes  in  hours  of  victory 
he  felt  as  though  the  world  was  at  his  feet.  He 
made  his  mistakes  as  people  always  have  done  since 
father  Adam  was  tempted  to  eat  the  forbidden  fruit. 
He  knew  agonizing  hours  of  trial  and  temptation 
and  disappointment. 

How  little  we  think  when  we  meet  people  in  the 
ordinary  walks  of  life  and  observe  only  the  agreeable 
surface  play  of  their  personality,  which  society  de- 
mands and  which  business  relationships  make  im- 
perative, how  deep  the  tragedy  may  be  that  is  going 
on  within  and  how  terrible  the  struggle  that  hides 
itself  away  behind  a  smiling  countenance.  But  I 
would  rather  live  with  my  foot  on  the  hot  iron  half 
the  time  and  feel  that  for  the  rest  of  it  I  was  doing 
the  deeds  of  a  real  man,  than  to  slide  along  in  ease 
and  comfort  and  indifference  to  the  world  without 
rising  to  its  opportunities,  without  feeling  the  exulta- 
tion of  its  victories. 

Our  David  believed  that  one  of  the  most  essential 
elements  of  success  is  to  go  straight  to  the  heart 
of  things,  and  deal  with  the  main  issue  first  and  con- 
sider the  preliminaries  and  the  prefaces  afterward. 
He  always  took  time  by  the  forelock  and  got  on  the 
235 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

ground  when  there  was  something  doing.  He  moved 
with  all  the  celerity  possible  to  meet  every  event  of 
his  life  and  rendered  quick  decisions  when  emergen- 
cies came. 

Sometimes  your  swift-moving  general  will  run 
into  the  ambush  of  the  enemy,  and  sometimes  he 
will  sunder  his  phalanx  by  the  very  celerity  of  his 
movements.  The  effect  of  quick  action,  barring  ac- 
cidents, is  in  general  dual.  It  increases  the  enthu- 
siasm of  the  attacking  party,  and  it  overawes  the 
party  which  is  put  on  the  defensive.  We  cannot 
afford,  of  course,  to  be  reckless  of  our  armament  and 
equipment,  but  when  all  things  are  in  readiness  we 
should  strike  with  all  the  speed  and  all  the  force  we 
possess  if  we  expect  to  win  victories. 

For  many  long  years  the  highways  and  the  by- 
ways of  his  native  section  knew  well  by  day  and 
by  night  the  rumble  of  the  swift-moving  vehicle 
of  our  country  doctor  friend.  Separated  -from  the 
profession,  of  the  city  by  a  distance  so  great  that  its 
aid  was  difficult  to  procure,  he  was  obliged  to  under- 
take many  things  which  would  otherwise  have  gone 
into  more  experienced  hands.  The  training  in  tech- 
nique and  method  which  resulted  were  to  have  a  far- 
reaching  influence  over  his  life  in  the  after  years 
when  he  was  to  enter  into  competition  with  the  men 

236 


YEARS  THAT  BRING  WISDOM 

in  the  city.  He  grasped  the  flying  moments  to 
regale  himself  on  such  advances  in  his  profession  as 
the  journals  and  the  new  editions  of  medical  and 
surgical  authors  brought  to  him.  He  traveled  in  his 
native  land  and  in  foreign  countries  for  purposes 
of  study  as  often  as  his  moderate  finances  would  per- 
mit. Twice  he  came  home  from  these  trips  for  study 
utterly  penniless. 

He  took  an  active  part  in  all  the  social  and 
political  affairs  of  the  locality  where  he  resided. 
He  knew  the  advantage  of  the  loyal  support  and 
abiding  confidence  of  many  friends  whose  fealty 
he  has  never  had  occasion  to  doubt;  he  knew  the 
bitterness  of  a  few  enemies  whose  vindictive  hatred 
saw  evil  motives  in  everything  he  tried  to  ac- 
complish. No  lukewarm  allegience  ever  falls  to  the 
lot  of  men  of  action.  They  are  loved  by  their  friends 
and  hated  by  their  enemies. 

One  beautiful  summer  morning  he  stood  upon  the 
elevated  slope  of  the  mountain  side  which  flanked 
his  native  town,  and  looked  out  over  the  rough  dusty 
roads  which  lead  away  in  every  direction.  He  thought 
of  all  the  hardships  he  had  endured  and  the  strug- 
gles he  had  made.  A  new  thought  came  to  him. 
He  said  to  himself,  "It  is  finished.  This  chapter 
has  come  to  its  logical  ending,  henceforth  my  compe- 

237 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

tition  is  to  be  with  the  men  of  the  city."  The  plan 
of  his  transition  to  this  new  theatre  of  action  took 
tangible  form,  and  was  soon  carried  into  execution. 

Of  the  new  world  that  opened  up  to  him  immedi- 
ately with  the  change;  of  all  the  successes  profes- 
sional, financial  and  social  which  resulted  from  it; 
of  successful  competition  with  men  who  had  stood 
prominent  in  his  chosen  pursuit  but  little  need  be 
said.  Some  day  in  the  future  this  theme  may  be 
amplified. 

Presently  we  shall  call  the  roll  of  the  old  familiar 
group  who  played  the  game  of  chance,  after  which 
we  shall  permit  our  David  to  make  his  exit  in  a  short 
soliloquy  which  marks  the  ending  of  this  little  book. 


238 


CHAPTER  XI 

ON  THE  ANVIL  OF  THOUGHT 

AT  a  very  early  age  David  had  come  up  against 
the  so-called  conflict  between  religion  and 
science,  and  all  through  high  school  and  college,  and 
for  the  many  busy  years  which  succeeded  them,  his 
mind  had  been  much  occupied  with  the  problems 
involved  in  this  most  interesting  of  all  controversies. 
He  felt  at  first  that  it  was  sinful  to  allow  himself  to 
think  of  such  things,  because  the  best  reputed  people 
of  the  little  circle  in  which  he  moved  said  that  it  was 
dangerous  to  call  in  question  any  of  the  fixed  re- 
ligious opinions,  or  to  speculate  in  any  way  outside 
of  the  crystallized  forms  of  thought  involved  in  dog- 
matic religion. 

A  riper  mentality  has  convinced  him  that  there  is 
a  good  measure  of  truth  in  their  contention,  and  that 
many  men  have  made  shipwreck  of  all  faith  and 
have  foundered  on  the  rocks  of  modern  specula- 
tion. 

But  how  could  one  stop  the  clicking  of  this  terri- 
ble mental  escapement  which  God  had  started  in 
motion?  The  most  momentous  of  all  the  problems 
239 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

involved  in  this  mundane  existence  is  that  which 
pertains  to  the  hope  of  immortaUty.  Without  that 
hope  all  is  vain  and  of  no  lasting  consequence.  Why 
then  should  any  human  being  be  denied  the  right  to 
think  about  it,  to  weigh  evidence  pro  and  con,  and 
to  look  into  every  man's  theory  in  search  of  the 
truth.  Where  all  other  lines  of  thought  are  evolv- 
ing and  developing  why  should  our  religious  thought 
be  stationary? 

Between  the  extreme  position  of  the  ultra-religious 
man,  who  held  to  the  absolute  letter  of  scripture 
and  predicted  perdition  for  all  who  dared  to  veer  in 
the  least  degree  from  the  well  defined  outlines  of 
traditional  thought,  and  the  so-called  scientific  man, 
who  scoflfed  at  all  forms  and  ridiculed  all  creeds, 
there  was  little  consolation  to  be  found  by  the  honest 
plodder,  who  did  not  wish  to  break  away  from  the 
old  moorings,  but  who  wished  to  keep  an  open  mind 
ever  ready  for  the  truth. 

Thanks  to  the  liberalizing  process  of  the  years 
there  is  no  longer  manifest  that  hard  and  clean-cut 
line  between  these  two  classes  of  people  that  there 
used  to  be.  Both  parties  have  conceded,  and  we 
have  now  a  compromise  position  in  which  we  dare 
to  speak  our  ultimate  conviction  without  running 
the  risk  of  social  ostracism  on  one  side,  or  being  set 
240 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

down  as  mentally  weak  on  the  other  side.  We  have 
learned  the  great  lesson  of  toleration.  God  never 
made  two  leaves  alike,  nor  two  blades  of  grass  of 
the  same  pattern;  and  He  never  made  two  human 
beings  of  exactly  the  same  mentality.  We  must 
have  liberty  to  think  or  we  can  never  progress.  And 
David  has  fought  out  in  silence  during  all  these 
years  many  problems  involved  in  this  momentous 
question.  Some  degree  of  stability  seems  to  have 
come  to  him,  and  the  grounds  upon  whiclii  it  rests 
will  be  put  forth  as  the  following  excursion  into  the 
domain  of  life's  philosophy. 

Away  out  in  space  there,  as  far  as  the  eye  of 
man  aided  by  the  modern  miracles  of  optics  can 
penetrate,  we  perceive  the  presence  of  inexorable 
law.  In  the  minutest  living  organism,  visible  only 
by  being  magnified  a  thousand  times,  the  same  reg- 
ular, inevitable  conditions  are  manifest.  Law,  order, 
everywhere  law  and  order,  which  operates  with  such 
precision  that  its  processes  can  be  computed  for  mil- 
lions of  years  in  the  future  to  the  hair's  breadth  of 
time  and  space.  The  planets  revolve  in  their  fixed 
orbits  with  unvarying  exactness.  The  great  siderial 
clockwork  never  jumps  a  cog.  The  oceans,  though 
sometimes  stirred  into  fury  by  the  passing  storms  are 
yet  true  to  the  law  of  gravitation  and  never  transcend 

241 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

the  dead  line  which  the  continents  have  raised  against 
them.  The  valleys,  the  everlasting  hills,  though 
shaken  oftentimes  with  the  earthquake,  or  excoriated 
by  the  fierce  storm,  are  yet  true  to  the  contour  which 
nature  imposed  upon  them  when  they  arose  from 
the  slime  of  the  mighty  deep.  The  seasons  come 
and  go  in  regular  sequence,  measuring  off  time  as 
with  an  escapement,  which  is  inexorable  in  its  ex- 
actness. 

The  universe  with  all  its  component  parts  is  but 
the  working  out  of  a  great  foreordained  system  of 
law.  Not  a  molecule  can  escape  its  Omnipotent 
grasp.  The  instinct  of  the  bee  makes  it  the  mes- 
senger of  love  for  the  flower  and  the  collector  of 
ambrosial  food  for  man.  The  flower  breathes  its 
perfume  into  the  air  to  attract  the  bee  and  spreads 
its  gaudy  petals  in  the  summer  sun  in  display  of  the 
love  message  it  has  to  send  to  its  kindred  flower. 
True  to  its  peculiar  instinct  it  fulfills  its  own  life's 
functions  through  the  assistance  that  it  bestows  on 
others.  The  same  interdependence  is  everywhere 
manifest  in  nature.  No  single  thing  could  exist 
apart  from  the  great  aggregate  that  goes  to  make  up 
the  universe.  The  systole  and  diastole  of  the  life 
current  on  our  great  mother  Earth  brings  seedtime 
and  harvest.  The  plant  inhales  the  gas  that  is  poison 

242 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

to  the  animal  and  converts  it  into  forces  that  are  in- 
dispensable to  animal  life.  All  things  are  made  sub- 
servient to  the  animal  and  plant  life,  which  came 
upon  the  earth  in  due  process  of  time  to  appropriate 
the  forces  that  were  designed  for  its  service  from 
before  the  beginning  of  time. 

And  what  is  this  thing  we  call  life  that  has  taken 
possession  of  the  universe  and  laid  all  things  under 
tribute  to  itself?  Is  it  some  occult  force,  born  of 
the  mysteries  of  chemistry  and  liberated  in  the 
nascent  state  of  molecules?  Is  it  the  music  of 
the  aeolean  harp  which  vibrates  with  the  passing 
breeze  and  ceases  when  the  harp  becomes  unstrung? 
Or  is  it  an  entity  superimposed  upon  all  the  dead 
forces  of  nature,  and  utilizing  them  in  the  working 
out  of  its  vital  functions  ?  The  answer  to  this  most 
pertinent  question  we  may  be  pardoned  for  passing 
up  for  a  while,  until  we  shall  have  discussed  some 
of  the  minor  problems  leading  up  to  it. 

We  may  ask  ourselves,  first,  Does  the  life  of  man 
differ  from  the  life  of  the  animal  and  the  life  of  the 
plant?  and,  if  so,  is  the  difference  in  the  quality  or 
the  quantity  of  the  life  element?  Whatever  our  ex- 
planation, I  can  think  only  of  a  common  genesis  for 
all  living  things.  Whether  by  a  special  act  of  Provi- 
dence or  by  a  graduated  process  with  a  million-year 

243 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

measuring  tape  to  compute  the  length  of  it,  we  must 
agree  that  it  is  all  a  part  of  the  one  great  plan,  and 
that  the  same  general  laws  are  manifest  in  its  elab- 
oration. Think  how  many  things  we  have  in  com- 
mon with  the  animals.  Anatomically  they  possess 
potentially  every  organ  we  possess.  They  have 
lungs  to  breathe  with,  they  have  stomach  and  intes- 
tines to  digest  with,  the  eye  of  both  is  identical  in  its 
mechanism,  the  ear,  the  heart,  the  blood  vessels,  the 
plan  of  the  integument.  The  peculiarity  of  arrange- 
ment of  the  bones  of  the  limbs,  with  one  long  bone 
extending  from  the  trunk  to  its  articulation  with  two 
parallel  smaller  bones,  which  in  turn  articulate  with 
five  separate  digits  is  a  type  that  embraces  the  world 
of  vertebrates  from  man  at  the  head  of  the  kingdom 
through  every  form  of  animal  which  has  a  back- 
bone, even  to  the  fowls  that  fly  in  the  air  and  the 
whales  that  swim  in  the  mighty  deep.  Bones,  mus- 
cles, nerves,  connective  tissue,  joints,  glands,  mem- 
branes, are  identical.  The  digestive  juices  are 
chemically  the  same,  and  the  brain  though  differing 
in  form  and  size  is  yet  constructed  on  the  same  prin- 
ciple. The  instincts  we  possess  and  many  of  our  men- 
tal processes  are  variously  manifested  by  diflFerent 
animal  species.  The  special  senses  are  in  general 
more  acute  with  them  than  with  us.  I  think  we  must 
244 


ON   THE   ANVIL  OF   THOUGHT 

agree,  then,  that  the  life  of  the  animal  is  essentially 
the  same  kind  of  life  as  the  life  of  man. 

The  identity  of  plant  and  animal  life  is  not  so 
strikingly  apparent,  and  yet  the  same  microscopic 
cellular  structure,  and  the  same  vital  processes  are 
manifestly  demonstrable,  even  in  the  lowest  type  of 
vegetable  life.  Down  at  the  lowest  vital  levels  it  is 
a  matter  of  some  difficulty  to  decide  sometimes 
whether  particular  organisms  should  be  classified  as 
plants  or  animals.  The  plant  which  draws  its  sus- 
tenance directly  from  the  soil  seems  to  be  the  inter- 
mediary between  the  chaos  of  dead  matter  and  the 
more  highly  organized  forms.  The  plant  breathes, 
and  its  life  blood  circulates.  It  is  nature's  first  great 
chemist,  which  builds  up  the  molecular  formulas  for 
the  higher  types  of  life. 

Down  at  the  basis  of  things  there  must  be  a  gen- 
eralization of  the  life  principle,  and  its  source  must 
be  the  same  for  all  organized  forms.  When  you 
force  air  through  one  aperture  of  a  flute,  you  get  a 
high-pitch  note,  and  when  you  force  it  through  an- 
other you  get  a  low-pitch  note ;  but  it  is  all  the  same 
kind  of  atmosphere.  So  with  the  life  principle.  Or- 
ganic forms  from  the  moneron  to  the  man  are  in- 
telligent just  to  the  extent  that  their  physical  being 
can  focus  the  intelligence  of  God  from  the  universe. 
245 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

If  we  accept  the  theory  of  evolution,  which  seems 
to  have  at  least  a  good  background  of  evidence,  the 
correlation  of  the  various  forms  of  life  is  at  once 
apparent.  The  great  Soul  of  the  Universe,  Spirit  of 
God,  or  whatever  you  choose  to  call  it,  is  elaborating 
a  plan,  which  manifests  life  in  an  ever  ascending 
scale  as  the  ages  roll  away,  and  the  inferior  forms 
are  but  the  by-product  turned  to  use  in  the  economy 
of  nature. 

Scientists  tell  us  that  the  developing  embryo  re- 
peats in  its  evolving  life  of  a  few  months  the  whole 
series  of  changes  that  have  figured  in  the  organic 
world  from  the  beginning.  At  first  a  single-celled 
organism,  then  a  fish  with  gills,  then  a  batracian, 
then  a  mammal,  then  a  man.  The  whole  drama  of 
philogeny  is  enacted  in  miniature,  and  nature  re- 
capitulates her  develoments  to  date  in  the  embryonic 
life  of  each  individual.  It  is  as  if  the  Creator  in 
the  beginning  worked  with  the  simplest  forms,  and 
gradually  pushed  out  new  brain  lobes  for  increased 
intelligence,  and  better  mechanical  contrivances  in 
the  anatomy  with  each  succeeding  epoch  of  time, 
keeping  always  the  story  of  His  work  to  date  in 
evidence  and  manifesting  it  anew  in  each  individual 
life. 

The  different  superimposed  formations  of  the 
246 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

earth's  crust  show  a  sucession  of  organic  forms,  both 
vegetable  and  animal,  which  have  been  gradually 
evolving  from  elementary  types  to  the  more  com- 
plex and  more  highly  organized  species  which  cul- 
minate in  the  present  epoch,  but  which  will  no  doubt 
be  subject  to  the  same  variations  in  the  future  as  in 
the  past. 

Thus  we  behold  that  a  great  plan  is  in  progress. 
The  whole  universe  is  laid  under  tribute  to  these 
passing  forms  of  life.  They  are  the  one  thing  for 
which  all  other  things  are  created.  Force  and  matter 
are  immutable  in  their  action  and  counteraction.  Life 
only  is  the  changeable  thing.  Can  we  imagine  such 
a  great  interdependent  scheme,  involving  as  it  does 
the  whole  cosmic  process,  being  the  blind  work  of 
chance  ?  In  every  aspect  of  it  there  is  the  indication 
of  an  intelligent,  purposeful  force  back  of  it. 

The  materialist  is  driven  to  a  sorry  plight  when  he 
asserts  that  the  vital  processes  are  but  the  manifesta- 
tion of  chemical  reaction.  He  has  learned  a  few  of 
the  very  elementary  chemical  laws,  and  has  seen 
glimpses  of  the  wonderful  phenomena  of  physiology, 
but  the  great  occult  processes  of  chemirtry  and 
physiology  will  forever  baffle  his  efforts.  The 
miracle  that  goes  on  within  the  fragile  shell  of  an 
egg  transcends  all  human  understanding.     The  mind 

247 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

of  man  stands  hopeless  before  the  puzzle.  The  few 
facts  which  go  to  make  up  the  science  of  chemistry 
and  the  fewer  which  go  to  make  up  the  science  of 
physiology  are  like  the  fossil  shells  we  pick  up  on 
the  seashore,  but  the  great  abyss  from  whence  they 
came  will  forever  conceal  its  great  generalizations 
under  fathomless  depths.  And  yet  men  will  pre- 
sume with  these  few  elementary  facts  in  their  hands 
to  say  that  chemism  is  life  and  that  life  is  chemism. 

Millions  of  years  ago  the  Creator  foresaw  that 
man  would  come;  and  that  he  would  require  heat 
and  light  and  mechanical  force  greater  than  the  or- 
dinary processes  of  nature  could  furnish,  and  the 
sunbeams  that  fell  wasting  on  the  face  of  that 
primeval  world  were  trapped  by  the  coal  fern,  and 
stored  away  as  the  force  that  held  the  molecules  of 
fixed  carbon  in  the  coal  seams  of  the  earth.  There 
was  no  use  for  this  stored  energy  for  untold  millions 
of  years  during  which  the  seashores  were  submerged 
and  buried  and  then  elevated  into  the  mountain 
heights.  Then  man  made  his  advent  and  began  to 
wrest  his  birthright  from  the  crude  face  of  nature. 
Who  of  sane  mind  shall  call  this  the  work  of  blind 
force  ?  Much  more  is  the  God-power  necessary  with 
this  conception  of  things,  than  with  the  empirical 
world  of  special  providences.  The  individual  may 
248 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

well  be  left  to  his  own  shift  in  such  a  stupendous 
plan. 

And  whither  is  it  leading  us,  and  whence  came 
it  out  of  the  chaos  of  the  past?  Time  had  no  be- 
ginning and  will  have  no  end.  Has  all  the  eternity 
of  the  past  been  wasted,  and  is  this  the  first  re- 
hearsal of  the  great  drama  of  life?  Or  are  we  not 
in  an  eternal  process  as  myriads  before  have  been, 
and  as  myriads  to  come  are  yet  to  be  ?  Is  there  not 
some  grand  climacteric  act,  some  final  product  in 
which  the  work  of  God  shall  be  consummated  ?  We 
have  evolved  so  far,  and  learned  to  appropriate  so 
much  of  the  omniscience  and  omnipotence  of  God. 
Why  should  we  stop  now  before  we  have  reached 
the  final  goal? 

If  I  should  assert  something  I  cannot  prove  I 
would  be  open  to  the  charge  of  speculating.  Yet 
why  should  I  not  speculate  on  the  meaning  of  the 
great  cosmic  process  if  I  desire  to  do  so?  Am  I 
doing  any  more  than  the  man  who  propounds  the 
nebular  hypothesis,  or  the  man  who  divides  matter 
into  molecules  and  atoms.  The  basis  of  all  our 
knowledge  of  cosmic  phenomena  is  hypothesis, 
which  may  one  day  prove  to  be  incorrect.  The 
scientific  world  will  permit  me  to  indulge  with  im- 
punity in  speculation  so  long  as  I  do  not  transcend 
249 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

certain  materialistic  boundary  lines  which  have  been 
mapped  out.  Of  matter  and  force  I  may  speculate 
with  propriety,  but  when  I  bring  a  third  element  into 
my  conjecture,  and  project  a  hypothesis  with  spirit 
as  the  central  figure,  I  am  treading  on  dangerous 
ground,  and  need  beware  that  I  am  unbuckling  my 
armor  and  exposing  myself  to  the  shafts  of  ridicule. 
If  I  write  in  the  potential  mood  I  shall  escape  the 
burden  of  proving  what  I  say,  and  my  guess  may  be 
as  near  the  mark  as  any  other's. 

From  comparative  anatomy,  from  embryology, 
and  from  paleontology  the  evolution  theory  seems 
to  substantiate  well  its  claims  as  an  explanation  of 
the  genesis  of  the  organic  world.  If  it  be  true  that 
there  has  been  an  evolution  of  physical  forms  in  an 
ever  ascending  scale,  with  man  as  the  final  product 
to  date,  why  not  an  evolution  of  spiritual  entities  to 
correspond?  In  all  the  ages  that  are  past  this 
physical  being  of  mine  was  mingled  in  chaos  with 
the  world  of  matter.  The  calcium  and  the  iron  and 
the  phosphorous  of  which  it  is  composed  were  a  part 
of  the  great  unorganized  aggregate  of  these  sub- 
stances. But  there  came  a  time  when  it  was  my 
happy  lot  to  be  differentiated  and  selected  from 
chaos  to  become  an  individual.  By  a  mysterious 
biological  process  which  I  cannot  understand  this 

250 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

selection  was  made,  and  I  who  before  was  chaos  am 
now  a  living,  breathing  individual  form.  This  is 
manifestly  and  evidently  true  of  the  physical  man. 

But  what  about  the  spiritual  complement  of  man  ? 
Where  in  all  the  ages  past  has  been  the  spiritual 
entity  that  inhabits  this  body  and  manifests  its 
mental  processes  and  emotions  through  it?  Some- 
where, organized  and  selected  or  unorganized  and 
chaotic,  it  has  existed  for  all  time.  Does  it  not  seem 
reasonable  that  the  individualizing  process  has  been 
true  of  the  spiritual  ego  as  well  as  of  the  physical  egO  ? 
From  the  aggregate  of  unorganized  spirit  an  indi- 
vidual was  separated  henceforth  to  exist  as  an  inde- 
pendent life,  to  assume  responsibilities  of  its  own, 
and  to  move  amid  the  marvels  of  the  universe.  And 
if  there  has  been  an  evolution  of  physical  forms,  why 
not  a  corresponding  evolution  of  spiritual  entities  in 
the  same  ascending  scale? 

I  think  there  is  at  least  the  essence  of  plausibility 
in  such  a  theory,  and  we  may  assume  that  it  ex- 
plains the  cosmic  process  as  we  see  it  past  and  pres- 
ent in  the  various  phases  of  its  evolution.  We  may 
well  ask  ourselves,  What  about  the  future  ?  where  is 
this  stupendous  process  of  organization  leading  to? 
and  what  is  its  outcome  to  be  ? 

There  is  a  vague  suggestion  that  harks  back  to  the 
251 


AFTER    TWENTY     YEARS 

dawn  of  the  history  of  man  and  runs  through  the 
various  phases  of  human  conjecture  from  the  be- 
ginning, that  what  God  is  man  may  become.  The 
ancient  Greeks  and  Romans  deified  their  rulers,  the 
mediaeval  enthusiast  deified  his  saints,  and  peopled 
the  empyrean  with  celestialized  personages  to  whom 
he  directed  his  worship.  The  greatest,  most  satisfy- 
ing thought  that  religion  ever  gave  to  the  world  is 
this  very  one:  "What  God  is  man  may  become." 
We  each  have  the  potentialities  of  God  within  us 
in  an  undeveloped  state.  The  purpose  of  all  our  ex- 
periences is  to  develop  the  God-faculties  we  possess 
and  enable  us  to  approximate  ever  nearer  the  om- 
niscience of  Deity,  Experience  is  the  only  thing  that 
develops  intellect,  and  intellect  in  perfection  is  the 
only  thing  that  distinguishes  God  from  inferior 
beings. 

If  I  am  not  to  retain  this  individuality  in  the  fu- 
ture, why  has  God  made  this  gigantic  effort  from  the 
beginning  of  time  to  differentiate  me  from  chaos? 
To  each  of  us  the  most  vital  and  important  of  all 
things  is  life — individual,  self-conscious  life.  The 
universe  is  nothing  to  me  unless  I  can  live.  Is  God 
going  to  be  so  inconsistent  with  himself  as  to  destroy 
and  take  away  that  for  which  the  universe  has  put 
forth  such  effort?  Is  he  going  to  repeal  the  law  of 
252 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

life  which  He  permitted  to  be  written  in  the  code  of 
Creation?  Will  the  Creator  wanton  with  us,  and 
build  beautiful  forms  as  the  child  builds  block  houses 
simply  for  the  pleasure  of  knocking  them  to  pieces 
again?  Or  is  there  not  something  real  and  earnest 
and  tangible  in  this  world  of  ours  ? 

Are  you  then  antropomorphist  ?  Yes.  Are 
you  polytheist  ?  Yes.  I  am  anything  and  everything 
that  sees  perfecton  in  the  plan  of  God  and  Divinity 
in  the  possibilities  of  man.  Do  you  hold  the  old  con- 
ception of  the  great  man  God  with  flaming  eyes  and 
smoking  nostrils?  No.  What  then  is  your  concep- 
tion of  Deity?  My  conception  of  God,  in  part,  is 
the  great  indwelling  life  principle  of  this  world, 
which  manifests  itself  in  the  undeviating  laws  of  na- 
ture. What  relationship  then  does  this  hold  to  the 
perfected  man  who  is  said  to  be  in  the  image  of  God  ? 
When  man  becomes  perfected  he  will  be  entirely  in 
unison  with  God,  and  being  governed  by  the  constant 
laws  of  the  universe,  he  will  be  but  an  individualized 
unit  of  the  universal.  When  a  solution  of  sodium 
chloride  is  permitted  to  remain  at  rest,  it  precipitates 
from  its  substance  beautiful  crystals,  which  have  all 
the  physical  and  chemical  properties  of  the  mother 
solution.  They  are  simply  individualized  parts  of 
the  whole,  obeying  all,  the  chemical  laws,  and  fulfil- 
253 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

ling  all  the  physical  conditions  of  the  amorphous 
solution  that  produced  them. 

It  may  be  that  wei  bear  to  the  great  universal  life 
some  such  relationship  as  this :  We  move  and  breathe 
in  the  midst  of  the  menstruum  that  has  precipitated 
us.  Our  specialize  intelligence  is  a  unit  of  the  univer- 
sal mind.  We  vibrate  with  the  emotions  of  the  g^eat 
Over  Soul.  As  Emerson  says,  we  are  the  rivulets 
that  manifest  the  pulsations  of  the  great  surging 
sea  of  life.  Struggling  and  contending  as  we  are 
for  position  and  individual  advantage,  with  a  mind 
and  will  that  appear  to  be  wholly  our  own,  there  is 
an  undertow  that  moves  us  unconsciously.  Let 
each  man  look  over  the  experiences  of  his  life  and 
see  if  there  were  not  times  when  the  plane  of  the 
gieat  universal  mind  intersected  with  the  plane  of 
his  individual  mind,  and  somehow,  somewhere  he 
could  realize  that  destiny  was  leading  him,  that  God 
was  directing  him. 

These  are  the  moments  of  the  fine  abandon 
of  the  poet  when  he  cuts  adrift  from  conven- 
tional thought  and  sails  on  the  sea  of  emotion. 
These  are  the  times  of  the  ultimatum  of  the 
patriot  when  he  says,  "Give  me  liberty  or  give 
me  death,"  These  are  the  times  when  we  choose 
each  of  us  unconsciously  a  way  unfrequented  by 
254 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

others,  unexplored  except  by  the  great  universal 
mind  which  directs  us  toward  some  unknown  goal 
where  we  find  peace  and  satisfaction. 

It  may  be  that  we  bear  to  the  great  universal  life 
some  such  relationship  as  the  single  cells  in  the  ani- 
mal organism  bear  to  the  whole  complex  structure. 
One  particular  cell  secretes  bile  and  stores  glycogen. 
It  seems  to  exist  for  no  other  purpose.  And  yet  it  has 
a  life-history  which  is  uniform  and  complete  in  all 
cells  of  its  kind.  The  brain  cell,  with  its  prolonga- 
tions, receives  and  transmits  the  impulses  of  the 
soul  within,  and  is  mechanically  adapted  for  that 
very  thing.  And  yet  each  cell  of  nervous  tissue  is 
a  vital  entity;  the  method  of  its  birth,  the  method 
of  absorbing  its  nutriment  and  getting  rid  of  its 
excrement  and  the  method  of  its  dissolution  are  all 
fixed.  It  seems  to  have  a  life  history  of  its  own, 
quite  apart  from  its  relationship  to  the  greater  life 
of  the  animal  to  which  it  belongs.  It  seems  not 
improbable  that  we,  in  fulfilling  the  functions  of  our 
individual  life,  are  fulfilling  also  the  functions  of 
the  great  universal  life. 

There  is  much  satisfaction  to  my  mind  in  these 
hypothetical  thoughts.  I  am  not  the  mere  accidental 
product  of  some  ungoverned  power,  which  pro- 
duces life  and  leaves  the  vitalized  clay  to  the  caprice 
255 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

of  other  ungoverned  forces  to  deal  with  wantonly 
and  wastefully  I  am  holding  down  this  outpost 
of  God's  universe.  I  am  a  sentinel  entrusted  with 
a  duty,  which  it  is  wisdom  for  my  own  sake  that  I 
fulfill,  for  when  I  fail  of  my  duty  to  the  universal 
life,  I  detract  from  the  advantages  of  my  individual 
life. 

The  human  body  as  a  machine  is  well-nigh  per- 
fect. The  defects  that  appear  in  our  anatomy  and 
physiology  and  that  make  demand  for  the  service 
of  the  physician  and  the  surgeon  are  altogether  ac- 
cidental. They  are  variations  from  the  dominant 
type.  Perfect  physiology  resulting  from  perfect 
anatomy  is  the  heritage  of  each  of  us. 

If  the  advocate  of  materialism  and  chance  crea- 
tion will  but  turn  his  attention  dispassionately  to  the 
human  body  as  a  mechanical  contrivance,  he  will  see 
unmistakable  evidences  of  an  adaptation  of  means 
to  ends  that  could  have  resulted  only  from  intelligent 
forethought. 

One  of  the  difficulties  which  the  early  makers  of 
microscopes  came  up  against  was  chromatic  aberra- 
tion. When  light  was  brought  to  a  focus,  a  halo  of 
rainbow  colors  played  about  the  object  in  the  field 
and  obscured  vision,  A  study  of  the  human  eye 
revealed  the  fact  that  the  different  refracting  media 
256 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

are  composed  of  lenses  of  different  degrees  of  hard- 
ness, and  when  microscopes  were  fashioned  after  it 
by  having  their  lenses  made  of  different  qualities 
of  glass  in  alternation,  the  difficulty  of  chromatic 
aberration  disappeared  entirely. 

We  must  agree,  I  think,  that  the  great  organizing 
intelligence  which  stands  back  of  the  organic  world 
was  cognizant  not  only  of  the  ordinary  laws  of 
optics,  but  of  the  very  defects  in  those  laws  which 
needed  special  arrangements  for  their  correction. 
Can  we  imagine  this  to  be  the  work  of  chance  ?  The 
human  ear  has  a  mechanical  contrivance  of  small 
articulated  bones  and  a  delicate  vibrating  membrane 
connected  with  the  organ  of  Corti,  which  is  like  the 
keyboard  of  a  piano,  tuned  to  all  degrees  of  pitch 
and  timber  and  connected  by  means  of  the  auditory 
nerve  with  the  cortex  of  the  brain  above,  where  the 
sound  waves  are  interpreted  as  uttered  words,  or  as 
musical  notes  or  other  significant  sounds,  and  stored 
away  for  future  reference.  Could  we  with  the  great- 
est stretch  of  our  imagination  look  upon  this  most 
wonderful  of  all  auditory  contrivances,  the  human 
ear,  as  the  work  of  chance  ? 

When  an  artery  is  severed,  one  would  naturally 
expect  the  district  to  which  it  was  distributed  to  die 
for  lack  of  nutriment.  But  a  study  of  anatomy 
257 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

reveals  the  fact  that  small  collateral  arteries  con- 
nect up  every  segment  of  the  larger  arteries  with 
the  segments  above  and  below  it,  so  that  the  circula- 
tion is  carried  on  right  past  the  break  as  if  nothing 
had  happened.  The  blood  itself  carries  in  solution 
a  substance  which  causes  it  to  coagulate  into  clots 
whenever  it  gets  outside  of  the  unbroken  intima  of 
the  vessels  which  contain  it. 

Whenever  an  artery  is  severed  by  accident  or 
design  the  inner  coat^  of  it  have  a  property  of  con- 
tracting and  drawing  themselves  into  the  open  lumen 
where  they  act  as  a  plug  to  stop  the  hemorrhage. 
Thus  we  see  that  in  the  circulation  of  the  blood  not 
only  the  ordinary  events  of  that  mysterious  process 
have  been  provided  for,  but  the  very  accidents  to 
which  each  individual  in  his  life's  experience  must  be 
subjected,  have  been  forestalled  and  the  means  of 
escape  provided. 

Many  years  ago  my  attention  was  directed  to  the 
healing  of  wounds.  I  asked  myself  how  it  was  that 
some  wounds  heal  quickly,  while  others  are  slow 
and  indefinite  in  their  time  of  resolution.  Take,  for 
example,  the  so-called  condition  of  proud  flesh  or 
exuberant  ulcer.  The  old  text-book  explanation 
of  this  common  phenomenon  is  that  the  circulation  is 
poor  and  that  the  anatomical  part  does  not  receive 
258 


ON   THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

enough  nutriment.  That  this  is  an  incorrect  conclu- 
sion is  easily  proved  by  the  fact  that  such  an  ulcer 
bleeds  profusely  at  the  least  touch.  There  is  abun- 
dance of  blood,  and  the  tissue  cells  are  produced 
in  such  profusion  that  they  fill  the  wound  with 
granulations  which  rise  above  the  level  of  the  adja- 
cent skin.  Why,  then,  does  the  ulcer  not  heal?  If 
we  were  going  to  repair  a  breach  in  the  wall,  bricks 
and  mortar  would  be  necessary,  but  an  intelligent 
use  of  the  materials  would  be  imperative.  If  we 
simply  dumped  them  down  in  the  gap  and  went  our 
way,  conditions  would  be  no  better  than  before. 
But  when  the  intelligent  mason  lays  the  brick  up  in 
order  and  adjusts  the  cement  between  them,  the  re- 
pair may  be  so  perfect  that  one  could  hardly  dis- 
tinguish the  difference  between  it  and  the  normal 
wall. 

Just  so  in  the  healing  of  wounds  and  ulcers.  Not 
only  are  cells  and  blood  necessary,  but  an  intelligent 
direction  of  the  process  of  repair,  so  that  nerve  shall 
unite  with  nerve  and  muscle  with  muscle,  etc. 

Unconsciously  to  us  there  exists  in  the  body  a 
monitor  of  repair,  which  has  the  function  of  preserv- 
ing the  body  in  perfect  symmetry  and  physiological 
exactness.  Hypothetically  we  can  locate  this  regu- 
lator and  director  of  the  healing  process  in  a  center 
259 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

of  the  cortex  of  the  brain.  Just  as  a  certain  district 
of  this  marvelous  gray  surface  layer  is  set  apart  to 
regulate  the  circulation,  and  another  to  regulate  the 
breathing  function,  we  can  imagine  that  another 
district  is  set  apart  to  control  the  healing  process. 
But  back  of  the  hypothetical  material  center  we  must 
imagine  the  soul,  which,  when  it  enters  the  body, 
must  carry  with  it  the  plan  and  specifications  of  its 
earthly  tabernacle  all  drawn  up  and  chartered.  The 
framework,  the  coverings  and  adornments,  and  the 
internal  mechanism  of  life  are  all  adjusted  to  each 
other  with  finest  precision.  To  maintain  for  the 
specified  time  of  three  score  and  ten  years,  more  or 
less,  this  perfect  equilibrium  and  symmetry  of  parts, 
is  an  obligation  accepted  from  the  Creator  as  a 
sacred  duty. 

The  working  of  this  soul-function  becomes  very 
apparent  under  certain  conditions.  When  an  injury 
from  within  or  from  without  perforates  stomach  or 
intenstine,  escape  of  the  contained  fluid,  laden  as  it 
is  with  bacteria,  would  mean  speedy  development 
of  peritonitis  and  death.  But  observe  the  intelligent 
manner  in  which  this  emergency  is  met  by  the 
physiologcal  processes.  Immediately  the  rectus 
muscle  becomes  rigid  as  a  board  to  hold  everything 
perfectly  still,  because  the  motion  of  breathing 
260 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

would  spread  the  poisonous  fluid.  The  great  omen- 
tum throws  its  protecting  arms  round  about  and  ad- 
justs itself  with  precision  on  all  sides  of  the  breach 
to  hold  the  diseased  process  within  as  small  a 
compass  as  possible;  the  peritoneum  throws  out 
plastic  lymph  to  glue  together  adjacent  surfaces, 
and  prevent  the  spread  of  the  gravitating  fluid.  The 
blood  responds  with  a  great  increase  of  its  white 
corpuscles,  which  are  the  defensive  warriors  of  the 
body,  and  these  are  forwarded  with  great  speed  to 
the  scene  of  conflict.  Immediately  the  patient  begins 
to  unload  the  stomach  by  vomiting  profusely. 

One  of  the  physiological  puzzles  which  was  most 
difficult  for  me  to  understand  in  my  student  days 
was  this  very  thing.  Why  should  patients  with 
acute  abdominal  diseases  invariably  vomit.  The 
explanation  which  finally  came  to  my  mind  was  this : 
When  the  miller  discovers  that  one  of  the  wheels  of 
his  machinery  is  broken  he  goes  straight  away  to  the 
head  of  the  mill-race  and  turns  off  the  steam,  be- 
cause he  knows  that  the  force  it  represents  will  do 
great  damage  if  it  continues  to  turn  the  disabled 
machinery.  And  so  in  our  physiological  processes. 
The  food  content  of  the  stomach  and  intestines 
would  do  irreparable  injury  if  it  were  propelled  on- 
ward into  the  damaged  segments,  and  so  nature  pre- 
261 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

vents  that  by  invoking  the  aid  of  the  emetic  center 
and  unloading  the  stomach  of  its  contained  food. 

Thus  we  see  in  the  hour  of  peril  a  co-ordination 
of  defensve  forces  which  can  have  but  one  explana- 
tion. The  soul  in  the  body,  like  the  captain  at  sea, 
meets  the  emergencies  of  its  mortal  career  with 
expedients  born  of  highest  intelligence  and  executed 
with  vigorous   promptitude. 

The  credulity  of  the  mind  which  can  accept  the 
theory  that  this  incomprehensible  human  machine  is 
the  aggregation  of  a  series  of  chance  circumstances 
perpetuating  only  such  individuals  as  happened  to 
be  endowed  by  accident  with  some  variation  from 
the  dominant  type  of  his  race,  and  eliminating  all 
others  which  failed  to  receive  this  chance  endowment 
and  which  admits  of  no  intelligent  adaptation  of 
means  to  ends  in  the  explanation  of  this  most  myster- 
ious of  all  the  phenomena  of  nature,  is  to  my  mind 
comparable  with  the  one  who  accepts  witchcraft 
and  transubstantiation  on  authority  and  makes  no 
inquiry  about  the  intrinsic  evidence  for  or  against 
them. 

Proving  things  from  authority  and  the  method 
of  making  all  deductions  conform  to  certain  precon- 
ceived ideas  has  by  no  means  been  limited  to  the 
religious  world.    In  Von  Haekel's  great  book,  "The 
262 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

Kiddle  of  the  Universe,"  after  a  masterly  presenta- 
tion of  all  those  correlated  facts  of  comparative  anat- 
omy, embryology,  and  paleontology  which  lead  up  to 
the  evolution  theory,  this  great  apostle  of  materialism 
says,  "When  we  follow  this  process  backward  from 
the  man  to  the  moneron  and  deal  with  its  genesis, 
we  must  admit  that  it  has  its  beginning  in  spontan- 
eous generation  of  life,  because  to  admit  any  other 
explanation  would  be  to  admit  a  miracle." 

Von  Haekel  was  well  aware  of  the  fact  that  this 
matter  of  the  spontaneous  generation  of  life  has  been 
a  perennial  problem  among  scientific  men  from 
ancient  times  and  that  whenever  it  came  up  for  the 
crucial  test  in  scientific  bodies  the  evidence  adduced 
has  been  overwhelmingly  against  it.  The  fact  that 
maggots  develop  in  decomposing  meat  was  at  one 
time  taken  as  positive  evidence  of  the  spontaneous 
generation  of  life.  But  when  Lowenhock  proved  by 
screening  the  meat  that  the  maggot  was  simply  the 
larval  form  of  the  fly,  which  was  hatched  out  of  the 
eggs  previously  deposited  by  that  ubiquitous  insect, 
the  apostles  of  spontaneous  generation  went  down 
in  defeat.  Then  when  Henle  and  Polender  and 
Devaine  discovered  the  world  of  bacteria  and  an- 
nounced the  mysteries  that  were  revealed  by  the 
microscope,  the  idea  was  again  revived  that  life  came 
263 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

spontaneously  from  matter.  The  advocates  of  this 
theory  asserted  themselves  with  great  emphasis.  They 
said  they  had  been  mistaken  only  in  the  size  of  the 
unit.  If  you  expose  to  the  open  air  a  vessel  contain- 
ing broth  or  any  infusion  of  organic  material,  in  a 
few  hours  millions  of  bacteria  will  be  swarming  in  it. 
This  was  to  them  positive  proof  that  bacteria  had 
their  origin  in  dead  matter.  But  when  the  master 
mind  of  Pasteur  attacked  the  problem,  he  proved  be- 
yond all  doubt  that  bacterial  organisms  are  subject 
to  the  same  law  as  all  other  organisms,  and  can  origi- 
nate only  from  others  of  their  own  kind.  The  con- 
stancy of  the  law  of  biogenesis  has  made  possible 
modem  surgical  technique  and  modern  conceptions 
of  sanitation. 

And  so  the  doctrine  of  spontaneous  generation  of 
life  went  down  before  the  masterly  work  of  Pasteur 
to  a  defeat  from  which  it  has  never  rallied.  Whether 
its  advocates  will  find  some  new  frame-work  for 
their  theory  or  not  is  a  matter  which  only  the  future 
can  determine.  But  it  is  certain  that  all  the  evidence 
brought  forward  to  date  has  met  with  a  rebuttal 
which  seems  decisive,  and  spontaneous  generation  of 
life  rests  now  only  on  the  basis  of  sheer  conjecture. 

With  all  this  data  before  him,  Von  Haekel  makes 
the  positive  statement  that  life  originated  from  dead 
264 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

matter.  In  taking  this  position,  as  he  says,  to  avoid 
accepting  a  miracle  it  seems  to  me  he  has  to  admit 
the  greatest  miracle  one  could  well  imagine.  Laz- 
arus coming  forth  from  the  tomb  is  but  an  ordinary 
incident  compared  with  the  wholesale  animation  of 
dead  matter,  accepted  as  a  fact  by  this  great  sceptic. 
He  is  so  true  to  his  preconceived  idea  of  monism  that 
he  is  willing  to  bend  heaven  and  earth  for  evidence 
to  prop  it  up.  If  there  is  any  difference  between  this 
type  of  mind  and  that  of  the  religious  fanatic,  I  fail 
to  comprehend  it.  They  are  of  the  same  breed,  and 
the  manifestation  of  their  perverted  mentality  differs 
only  as  a  result  of  the  wrong  tangent  each  has  got 
started  on. 

Has  the  human  machine  in  its  mechanism  a  means 
of  communication  with  God? 

This  is  the  pertinent  question  that  comes  down  to 
us  from  every  epoch  of  the  history  of  man.  Let  us 
set  aside  all  traditional  thoughts  and  methods,  and 
examine  the  matter  from  the  purely  rational  stand- 
point. 

Physiologists  are  all  agreed  that  the  origin  of  all 
the  impulses  of  life  is  in  the  pyramidal  cells  which  go 
to  make  up  the  gray  rind  of  the  brain.  All  our  life 
processes  seem  to  proceed  from  this  incomprehensi- 
ble thin  stratum  which  covers  the  hemispheres  of  the 
265 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

brain.  Do  all  the  impulses  which  these  brain  cells 
send  out  come  from  within,  or  do  they  not  receive 
and  transmit  impulses  from  an  extraneous  source  ? 

The  sending  station  of  a  wireless  telegraphy  sys- 
tem has  antennae  which  go  high  in  the  air.  When 
the  apparatus  is  in  operation  the  antennae  give  off 
Hurtzian  waves  which  radiate  in  every  direction. 
They  palpitate  upon  the  intangible  ether,  and  pass 
over  mountains  and  valleys  and  oceans  in  their  on- 
ward migration.  They  have  no  message  to  deliver  to 
any  object  encountered  by  the  way,  until  they  come 
to  another  station  which  is  tuned  to  vibrate  in  unison 
with  them,  a  hundred  or  a  thousand  miles  away.  As 
soon  as  they  impinge  upon  an  apparatus  which  has 
been  constructed  to  take  up  the  amplitude  of  their 
vibration,  they  deliver  up  the  intelligent  message 
which  they  convey.  The  mountain  and  the  valley  and 
the  ocean  over  which  they  have  traversed  received 
no  intimation  of  the  swift  speeding  message,  because 
they  could  not  take  up  the  amplitude  of  its  vibration. 
To  them  it  appeared  as  if  nothing  had  happened, 
though  the  cypher  dispatch  bore  record  of  the  fall  of 
an  empire  or  the  discovery  of  a  new  world. 

The  part  of  the  human  machine  we  call  the  cortex 
of  the  brain  is  not  only  a  sending  but  a  receiving 
station  for  mental  impulses.  Electricity  is  but  one 
266 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

phase  of  the  great  universal  force  which  manifests 
like  properties  in  all  its  mutations.  It  is  the  red 
ray  of  the  sunbeam  that  vibrates  from  the  rose,  while 
all  the  more  rapid  vibrations  pass  idly  by  its  gorgeous 
petals.  The  Aeolian  harp  takes  music  from  the 
breeze  by  its  power  of  selecting  its  affinity  of  vibra- 
tion from  the  commingled  melody. 

Just  so  in  the  world  of  psychology.  From  the 
great  central  mind  of  the  universe  emanates  intel- 
ligence which  permeates  all  space.  In  the  midst  of 
this  inundation  each  organic  form  is  hung  like  the 
aeolian  harp  to  select  its  affinity  and  manifest  to 
the  world  such  of  the  great  universal  mind  as  it  can 
focus.  I  am  aware  in  a  way  of  the  omniscience 
of  God,  but  I  am  capable  of  manifesting  only  a  part 
of  His  knowledge.  I  am  a  poorly  constructed  harp. 
But  there  are  some  chords  in  me  that  vibrate  true, 
and  of  this  much  of  the  will  of  God  I  am  an  inter- 
preter to  my  fellow  men. 

There  is  no  creature  so  mean  in  all  this  great  uni- 
verse but  has  something  of  the  Divine  message  to  re- 
veal. The  most  beautiful  of  all  the  organic  forms  I 
have  ever  seen  is  the  jeUy  fish  of  the  Calif ornian  seas, 
which  is  not  much  more  intelligent  than  the  slime  of 
the  ocean  of  which  it  is  constructed.  Not  a  glimmer 
of  mentality  does  it  manifest  as  it  sways  with  the 
267 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

restless  waves ;  and  yet  it  has  a  message  of  symmetry 
and  blended  colors  which  no  artist  could  approxi- 
mate. 

The  instincts  of  animals  are  but  their  manifesta- 
tion of  the  great  universal  mind  which  finds  in  their 
brain  cells  a  means  of  making  itself  known  to  the 
world.  The  duckling  which  is  hatched  in  the  hen's 
nest  knows  from  the  first  that  it  is  an  aquatic  animal, 
and  rushes  to  the  water  at  the  first  opportunity. 
The  rodent  tribe  are  aware  of  the  succession  of  the 
seasons  and  lay  up'  in  summer  their  winter's  supply. 
Among  the  ants  and  the  birds  and  the  bees  we  per- 
ceive a  purposeful  method  of  life  which  seems  often 
to  be  directed  by  the  highest  intelligence.  All  this 
we  may  designate  the  universal  revelation  of  God  to 
His  creatures,  before  which  we  all  stand  equal  ac- 
cording to  our  several    ability. 

I  am  moving  in  the  same  flood  of  light  as  the  crab 
which  goes  sidewise  and  the  serpent  that  crawls  on 
the  earth.  They  draw  from  the  same  source  as  I 
such  intelligence  as  they  can  manifest  in  their  sim- 
ple life  functions.  They  are,  as  I,  the  rivulets  that 
throb  before  the  surging  sea  of  life.  And  if  they 
receive  less  of  the  Divine  energy  than  I,  it  is  be- 
cause their  organization  can  appropriate  less  of  the 
passing  impulses. 

268 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

The  different  degrees  of  intelligence  among  men 
have  a  physical  basis.  The  Great  Spirit  manifests 
itself  through  brain  cells,  and  the  higher  the  organ- 
ization the  nearer  we  come  to  absolute  knowledge. 

The  world's  history  shows  that  many  of  the  great 
discoveries  have  been  announced  by  two  or  more 
individuals  almost  simultaneously,  though  they  were 
not  associated  in  any  way  in  their  research,  nor 
acquainted  with  each  other's  work.  What  does  this 
mean  ?  The  Great  Over  Soul  possesses  all  knowledge 
of  all  things,  and  is  ever  ready  to  reveal  any  part  of 
that  knowledge  to  whosoever  prepares  himself  to 
receive  it.  As  soon  as  these  brain  cells  of  ours  are 
trained  to  vibrate  in  unison  with  any  part  of  the  great 
universal  mind,  we  shall  receive  the  message  we 
are  prepared  to  receive.  When  two  or  more  individ- 
uals, by  a  process  of  mental  training  or  of  special 
endowment,  are  prepared  to  receive  a  special  mes- 
sage, they  will  see  the  light,  while  the  multitude  will 
be  oblivious  of  its  presence.  And  this  to  my  mind 
is  the  basis  of  what  we  call  revelation,  so  far  as  it 
concerns  the  average  man. 

That  there  are  physical  types,  one  higher  than  the 
other  in  the  great  organic  scale  we  admit  without 
question.  That  there  are  individuals  of  the  same 
type  especially  endowed  must  be  apparent  to  all  at 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

a  glance.  The  terms  prophet,  poet,  philosopher  are 
our  abstract  expressions  of  this  preference  of  nature 
for  some  of  her  sons.  It  must  needs  be  that  we  have 
oracles  to  express  to  us  the  mandates  of  the  Divine 
mind,  in  order  that  we  ourselves  may  learn  to  proph- 
esy and  draw  ever  nearer  to  the  omniscience  of  God. 
I  am  bathed  in,  I  am  inundated  by  the  g^eat  univer- 
sal flood  of  intelligence ;  but  it  may  be  still  and  mo- 
tionless around  me,  until  some  curent  is  started  by 
the  bark  of  another  as  it  passes  me  by.  We  wait  as 
the  mariners  of  old  for  the  moving  of  the  winds  that 
we  ourselves  may  spread  our  sails  and  begin  the  on- 
ward migration.  To  the  one  who  stirs  the  pool  of 
Bethesda  we  give  all  honor,  and  we  hesitate  not  to 
rush  into  the  vortex  he  has  created. 

I  am  a  humble  plodder,  proud  only  of  the  one 
desire  to  move  onward  and  upward.  I  am  willing 
to  bow  my  head  and  do  obeisance  when  the  prophets 
come,  be  they  scientific,  aesthetic,  or  religious.  I 
have  exulted  in  the  achievements  of  science,  I  have 
wept  in  the  presence  of  great  pictures,  I  have  wor- 
shiped at  the  shrine  of  Christ.  I  go  through  the 
world  with  skylight  and  sidelights  open,  eager  to 
appropriate  every  ray  of  light  that,  comes  to  me  from 
God  above  and  the  sons  of  God  around  me. 

It  is  my  humble  hope  that  by  learning  thoroughly 
270 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

the  way  of  subordination  I  shall  develop  by  degrees 
the  power  to  co-ordinate  with  the  .great  creative 
energy  of  the  universe.  HI  develop  my  talents  I 
shall  not  be  merely  passive  in  the  cosmic  drama,  but 
shall  become  an  active,  constructive  force  helping 
onward  the  program  of  progression  to  the  extent  of 
my  ability.  To  my  mind  in  this  matter  of  mental 
rapport  there  is  a  full  explanation  of  the  appearance 
of  those  peculiar  individuals  who  have  come  among 
us  at  various  times  and  places  in  the  world's  his- 
tory, and  established  new  systems  of  religion  or 
breathed  the  breath  of  life  into  the  old  ones  by  the 
boldness  of  their  assertions  and  the  earnestness  of 
their  protest  against  conventional  thought. 

They  are  the  voice  from  the  wilderness  which 
cries  repentance  to  each  succeeding  generation.  They 
are  the  minds  which  by  special  endowment  are 
developed  along  the  lines  of  spiritual  discernment. 
Jesus  of  Nazareth,  the  most  wonderful  among  the 
children  of  men,  was  the  highest  type  of  this  class 
of  individual.  His  spiritual  philosophy  stands  in  a 
class  by  itself  compared  with  that  of  all  other  phil- 
osophers and  teachers.  His  sermon  on  the  Mount 
embraces  the  principles  of  the  veritable  kingdom  of 
God.  Impractical  as  many  of  them  are  considered 
in  our  existing  social  systems,  and  with  mankind  as 
271 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

they  are  at  the  present  time,  they  penetrate  the  veil  of 
the  empyrian,  and  estabUsh  the  rule  of  God  in  His 
kingdom.  Surely  they  were  the  product  of  a  brain 
in  tune  with  the  infinite ! 

What  shall  I  say  of  the  canonical  miracles  with 
which  Jesus  is  accredited?  Is  there  any  ground  for 
reconciling  them  with  our  ideas  of  the  fixed  laws 
of  the  universe? 

My  first  observation  is  that  the  records  of  them 
may  not  be  exact.  Evidently  the  story  of  Jesus  was 
held  for  some  considerable  time  as  oral  tradition  and 
subjected  to  the  modifications  which  must  creep  into 
many  told  tales.  Four  different  evangelists  wrote 
the  history  of  Jesus.  While  they  agree  in  general 
upon  the  basic  facts,  there  are  enough  variations  in 
the  different  narratives  to  indicate  that  they  all  drew 
from  a  source  that  was  subject  to  modification.  The 
story  of  blind  Bartimeus,  the  story  of  Peter's  de- 
nial, and  the  story  of  the  fate  of  Judas  are  all  a 
little  different.  How  often  do  we  observe  in  the 
relation  of  the  same  contemporary  events  by  differ- 
ent individuals  similar  discrepancies! 

Our  oldest  biblical  manuscripts  do  not  approach 

the  Christian  era  within  several  generations  of  men. 

How  do  we  know  that  the  ancient  transcriptions  and 

the  modem  translations   are  correct?     No  doubt 

272 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

tliey  have  been  imperfect  in  their  execution  al- 
though safeguarded  by  all  the  methods  of  pains- 
taking scholars.  Interpolations  have  crept  into  the 
text;  idioms  have  been  robbed  of  their  meaning, 
thoughts  have  gone  into  the  new  language  in  a 
modified  form.  Quite  possibly  some  things  recorded 
as  miracles  have  been  exaggerated  by  repetition. 

With  these  sources  of  error  we  can  see  that  it  is 
absurd  to  hold  to  the  literal  phraseology  of  the 
scripture  as  the  exact  word  of  Deity.  Its  inspira- 
tion is  in  the  spirit  of  the  men  who  wrote  it  and  not 
in  the  dead  letter  which  has  come  down  to  us 
through  all  the  generations  of  men  who  have  given 
it  their  bias  and  handed  it  onward. 

Is  there  anything  in  the  experiences  of  the  pres- 
ent generation  of  men  that  would  make  probable 
the  miracles  of  healing  attributed  to  Jesus?  I 
answer  with  emphasis,  Yes!  Again  I  go  to  the 
human  machine  for  an  explanation  of  psychological 
and  physiological  phenomena  that  have  in  different 
times  and  places  been  regarded  as  miracles.  And  in- 
deed if  we  define  a  miracle  as  an  event  contrary  to 
the  traditional  ideas  of  things,  or  an  event  which 
transcends  our  understanding,  they  were  and  are 
miracles. 

In  the  human  body  there  is  one  set  of  nerves 
273 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

both  motor  and  sensory  which  come  down  through 
the  spinal  cord  from  the  brain  to  be  distributed  to 
voluntary  muscles  and  integument  and  bones  and 
ligaments,  etc.,  all  of  which  are  under  the  dominion 
of  the  conscious  mind  and  subject  to  a  greater  or 
less  degree  to  volitional  control  from  above.  Then 
there  is  another  set  of  nerves  called  the  sympa- 
thetic which  are  distributed  to  the  involuntary 
muscles  of  the  blood  vessels,  and  the  stomach  and 
intestine,  and  all  other  structures  whose  function  is 
not  under  the  control  of  the  will  nor  actuated  by 
the  conscious  mind. 

This  sympathetic  system  connects  up  with  the 
sub-conscious  part  of  the  brain  where  centres  have 
been  established  to  control  the  distribution  of  blood, 
the  peristalsis  of  bowel,  and  all  those  nutritional 
processes  which  can  be  performed  automatically.  If 
we  had  to  think  every  time  the  heart  is  to  beat,  or 
every  time  the  lungs  are  to  be  inflated,  we  should  use 
up  all  our  mental  energy  in  the  processes  of  our  own 
physiology,  and  life  would  be  to  no  purpose.  Na- 
ture has  wisely  removed  the  regulation  of  these 
vegetative  functions  from  the  domain  of  the  con- 
scious mind  that  we  might  without  impediment  pur- 
sue thoughts  which  have  no  bearing  on  the  processes 
of  our  own  body.  The  higher  ideation  of  intelligent 
274 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

beings  would  be  impossible  without  this  mechanism 
which  keeps  most  of  our  physiological  processes  sub- 
merged beneath  the  level  of  volitional  cerebration. 

The  peculiar  thing  about  this  sub-conscious  strat- 
um of  mind  is  that  it  is  amenable  to  suggestion  both 
from  within  and  from  without.  The  degree  of  sus- 
ceptibility varies  greatly  in  different  individuals,  but 
doubtless,  all  people  are  subject  to  it  in  some  de- 
gree. No  doubt,  as  has  been  already  suggested, 
there  is  in  this  subconscious  mind  a  center  that 
governs  the  repair  of  tissues  and  supervises  the  lay- 
ing down  of  cells  for  that  purpose.  We  can  imagine 
that  the  ordinary  process  of  repair  could  be  greatly 
accelerated  by  a  powerful  mental  suggestion,  just 
as  the  contractor  who  is  building  you  a  house  could 
respond  to  a  rush  order  by  multiplying  his  forces 
and  putting  through  a  three  month's  job  in  three 
weeks.  Miraculous  healing,  from  whatever  view- 
point we  can  imagine  it,  must  be  an  acceleration  of 
the  ordinary  slow  processes  of  repair. 

The  human  body  can  heal  itself  of  almost  all  ail- 
ments if  we  give  it  time  and  the  proper  conditions 
of  environment.  A  healing  power  is  one  of  our 
natural  endowments.  It  is  subject  to  modification 
by  suggestions  from  within  and  from  without.  The 
principle  involved  has  been  the  comer  stone  of  some 
275 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

religious  creeds,  and  has  written  itself  into  the  con- 
fession of  many  others. 

It  seems  not  a  sacrilege  to  me  to  think  that  Jesus, 
in  His  God-like  compassion  for  the  affliction  of  his 
neighbors  and  friends,  should  have  invoked  a  natural 
law  to  heal  them,  though  it  must  have  seemed  a 
supernatural  manifestation  to  all  those  who  saw  the 
results  of  his  magic  power  and  did  not  comprehend 
the  source  of  it. 

Why  should  we  insist  that  the  actions  and  ut- 
terances of  prophets  should  deal  with  things  dif- 
ferent from  the  laws  of  the  universe?  Is  not  God 
the  author  of  natural  law?  Some  people  think  the 
dominion  of  God  ends  where  natural  law  begins. 
They  forget  the  miracle  of  the  blade  of  grass  and 
of  the  blushing  rose.  The  most  stupendous  of  all 
miracles,  the  beginning  of  life,  they  regard  as  only 
a  natural  event.  If  the  transcendency  of  all  compre- 
hension be  defined  as  a  miracle,  surely  this  is  one 
great  enough  to  satisfy  the  definition.  We  are 
demanding  miracles  to  prop  up  our  faith  in  God 
when  all  around  us  they  are  falling  thick  and  fast. 

I  am  teleologist  to  the  core.     I  see  the  province 

of   God   in   every  manifestation   of  life;   in   every 

contrivance  of  nature  for  the  perpetuation  of  life. 

JesuS  was  a  great  healer  because  he  had  the  part  of 

276 


ON   THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

His  brain  which  comprehends  the  healing  power 
well  developed,  and  could  interpret  perfectly  this 
part  of  the  great  universal  intelligence.  He  was  an 
exponent  of  the  principles  of  the  kingdom  of  God 
because  he  had  become  completely  in  tune  with  the 
infinite. 

As  to  his  supermundane  genesis  I  shall  not  dispute 
it,  considering  how  far  he  transcended  all  other  hu- 
man beings.  We  are  justified  in  the  belief  that 
nature  made  some  great  exception  in  his  behalf, 
considering  what  he  was  and  what  he  did,  though 
I  do  not  believe  that  he  had  the  God  attributes  dif- 
ferent in  kind,  but  only  in  degree,  from  the  rest  of 
us.  We  are  all  the  sons  of  God  and  have  within  us 
all  the  attributes  of  Deity  in  embryo. 

From  my  childhood  I  have  read  and  reread  the 
narrative  of  the  administration  and  the  superlative 
doctrines  of  Jesus  of  Nazareth.  The  simple  direct 
story  bears  the  evidence  of  truth  in  its  very  sim- 
plicity. I  accept  it  as  essentially  correct,  though  the 
explanation  of  it  from  the  modem  viewpoint  must 
differ  a  little  from  the  explanation  given  by  his  con- 
temporaries. Considering  that  the  records  we  have 
were  produced  by  men  with  fallible  human  judg- 
ment, we  cannot  imagine  that  we  have  a  full  and 
perfect  record  of  all  he  did  and  said.  Each  narrator 
277 


AFTER     TWENTY     YEARS 

must  of  necessity  have  injected  something  of  his 
own  personality  into  the  story,  and  interpreted  the 
apparent  supermundane  occurrences  according  to  his 
individual  bias  and  according  to  the  prevailing  idea 
of  things  in  that  particular  age.  I  accept  the  actual 
facts  related  by  each  of  them  and  put  my  own  con- 
struction on  their  meaning. 

I  assert  again  the  absolute  right  of  each  individual 
to  freedom  of  thought  in  these  vital  matters.  It 
seems  to  me  that  the  man  who  dares  not  weigh  and 
analyze  is  the  man  who  lacks  faith.  He  is  afraid 
to  trust  God  for  fear  that  something  in  the  mechan- 
ism of  the  universe  will  conflict  with  his  fond  tradi- 
tion. He  is  willing  to  make  God  inconsistent  with 
himself  that  he  might  cling  to  the  conception  that 
was  started  thousands  of  years  ago  by  men  of  like 
passions  and  like  imperfections  with  himself.  Re- 
ligion to  my  mind  is  a  progressive  thing,  just  as 
science  is  progressive.  It  is  preposterous  to  think 
that  our  knowledge  of  all  other  things  should  ex- 
pand and  progress,  but  that  our  knowledge  of  Deity 
should  remain  stationary. 

The  idea  of  the   immaculate  conception   is  not 

miraculous  to  me  in  the  face  of  what  modem  science 

has  revealed  about  generation.     That  the  ordinary 

processes  of  nature  can  be  modified,  and  their  con- 

278 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

ditions  changed  is  the  observation  of  every  worker 
in  biology  and  every  breeder  of  animals.  Jesus  was 
our  elder  brother  because  he  was  a  human  being 
with  body  and  parts  like  the  rest  of  us.  He  trans- 
cended all  things  human  in  his  spirituality  because 
his  brain  by  natural  endowment  was  attuned  to 
vibrate  in  unison  with  a  far  greater  part  of  the 
infinite  mind.  And  this  is  the  particular  wherein  the 
men  we  call  prophets  differ  from  ordinary  people. 
By  special  endowment  they  are  attuned  to  a  greater 
part  of  that  particular  phase  of  the  infinite  mind 
which  we  designate  spirituality,  and  the  ispecial 
service  they  have  rendered  to  the  world  is  to  reveal 
the  things  which  are  spiritual. 

In  delivering  their  spiritual  message  they  have 
sometimes  got  tangled  in  the  phraseology  of  it  some 
of  the  prevailing  ideas  of  cosmic  philosophy  of  the 
age  in  which  they  lived.  This  was  purely  accidental. 
They  delivered  their  message  in  the  written  form, 
sometimes  adorned  with  imagery  which  was  purely 
metaphorical  to  them.  But  the  extreme  orthodox 
interpreter  of  the  ages  to  follow  took  that  message  as 
the  word  of  Deity  verbatim  and  found  hiiiiself  in 
conflict  with  the  prevailing  ideas  of  the  mechanism 
of  the  universe,  because  science  had  been  going  for- 
ward with  colossal  strides  during  all  the  centuries 
279 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

in  which  he  insisted  that  religion  should  remain 
stationary. 

And  herein  lies  the  essence  of  the  so-called  conflict 
of  religion  and  science.  It  has  been  a  conflict  over 
the  interpretation  of  the  processes  of  nature  in  which 
the  crude  conceptions  of  the  less  enlightened  earlier 
ages  have  been  placed  in  opposition  to  the  more  en- 
lightened conceptions  which  have  taken  advantage 
of  all  the  progress  made  by  science  in  the  in- 
terim, and  the  real  essence  of  religion  has  been 
left  entirely  out  of  the  controversy.  Society  in 
all  ages  has  divided  itself  into  two  classes.  One 
clings  to  the  literal  wording  of  old  traditions  the 
other  accepts  the  new  wine  of  truth  and  is  willing  to 
dispense  with  the  old  bottles  of  tradition.  The  mes- 
sage of  the  prophets  should  be  taken  for  what  it 
was  intended  to  be,  and  meanings  should  not  be 
read  into  it  which  were  never  meant  by  the  author. 
Surely  it  is  enough  that  they  should  enlighten  us  on 
spiritual  matters,  since  science  ignores  all  things 
spiritual. 

Good  and  evil  are  but  the  positive  and  negative 
phases  of  universal  law.  Righteousness  is  applied 
knowledge.  Vice  is  applied  ignorance.  The  moral 
law  is  as  inexorable  as  the  law  of  gravitation,  and 
he  who  flies  in  the  face  of  it  will  be  punished  here 
280 


ON    THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

and  now.  Each  day  is  a  day  of  judgment.  I  am 
the  sum  total  of  my  actions  to  date.  The  degree  of 
righteousness  to  which  I  attain  is  an  indicator  of  the 
degree  of  perfection  of  my  rapport  with  the  great 
universal  mind.  If  I  sin,  it  is  an  indication  that  I  am 
not  entirely  in  tune  with  the  infinite.  I  cannot  be 
perfect  because  I  am  a  poorly  constructed  machine. 
My  mental  bearings  get  out  of  adjustment  some- 
times, and  I  would  go  forever  wrong  but  for  the 
power  within  me  and  the  assistance  I  can  get  from 
my  fellows  to  become  readjusted.  The  fact  that  I 
can  come  again  into  harmony  with  the  Infinite  mind 
is  a  verification  of  the  wisdom  and  righteousness  of 
repentance. 

I  assert  myself  in  a  new  phase  of  transcendental- 
ism. The  man  who  takes  Milton's  Paradise  Lost  as 
his  model  of  pure  English,  and  uses  it  to  illustrate 
the  perfection  of  our  mother  tongue,  concerns  him- 
self only  with  the  structure  of  words  and  sentences 
and  paragraphs  and  their  relationship  to  one  another, 
and  he  disregards  entirely  the  subject  matter  of  the 
world's  greatest  epic  poem  which  is  couched  in  these 
terms.  The  big  thought  back  of  Milton  s  perfect 
poem  is  not  germane  to  the  purpose  of  the  man  who 
only  wishes  to  deal  with  his  syntax. 

And  so  I  find  science  and  so  I  find  dogmatic 
281 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

religion.  They  are  dealing  with  the  minutia  of  the 
processes  of  the  universe  and  the  stereotyped  forms 
of  God's  revelations  and  forgetting  the  great  corre- 
lating purpose  which  stands  back  of  all  of  them.  I 
refuse  to  be  held  by  your  technicalities.  I  project  my 
mind  to  the  bounds  of  time  and  space  and  read  the 
revelation  of  God  first  hand  from  the  starry  vault 
and  the  endless  panorama  of  mundane  processes. 

I  know  as  well  as  I  know  anything  that  comes  to 
me  through  my  reasoning  faculties  that  this  life 
will  not  end  with  the  dissolution  of  the  body.  That 
God  has  put  forth  such  herculean  effort  to  produce 
men  for  no  other  purpose  than  to  live  the  few  years 
of  this  mortal  probation,  is  preposterous.  The  intel- 
lect, the  soul  of  man,  is  too  great  and  noble  an 
achievement  to  be  cast  away.  Just  how  the  restitu- 
tion is  to  come  we  do  not  know. 

The  greatest  wonder  to  me  is  that  there  should 
be  any  death.  In  this  human  machine  is  inherent 
the  marvelous  power  of  regenerating  all  of  its  parts. 
For  the  score  and  more  years  of  adult  life  before  we 
reach  the  period  of  the  senile  changes,  the  different 
tissues  of  the  body  are  perfectly  regenerated,  and 
kept  up  to  full  functional  efficiency,  and  we  ask  our- 
selves why  could  not  this  process  of  self  regenera- 
tion go  on  forever.  The  wonder  is  that  all  life  is 
282 


ON   THE   ANVIL   OF   THOUGHT 

not  eternal.  If  perfect  regeneration  of  tissues 
is  possible  for  twenty  years,  why  is  it  not  pos- 
sible for  all  time!  The  mutations  we  call  life 
and  death  are  wonders  beyond  my  comprehension, 
but  I  am  sure  they  are  vital  parts  in  the  great 
onward  movement  of  souls.  We  stand  on  the  brink 
of  the  chasm  which  is  swallowing  up  all  things 
human,  and  penetrate  only  with  the  eye  of  faith  into 
the  mysteries  beyond.  .  But  the  perfect  adaptation  of 
means  to  ends  in  all  the  processes  of  the  universe 
should  convince  us  that  the  sleep  we  call  death  is  a 
needful  thing  in  the  great  final  regeneration  just  as 
the  sleep  which  daily  interrupts  our  consciousness 
is  needful  in  the  repair  of  our  tissues.  The  human 
machine  needs  daily  repairs,  and  at  the  end  of  the 
three  score  or  more  years  of  its  conflict  with  sin 
and  its  struggle  with  the  forces  of  nature  it  needs 
a  great  final  overhauling  and  readjusting  to  prepare 
it  for  the  next  act  in  the  drama. 

I  know  not  the  method  of  the  final  restitution,  but 
I  do  seem  to  know  that  it  will  come.  My  faith  is  not 
based  upon  tradition  alone,  but  upon  the  aggregate 
of  all  the  phenomena  that  go  to  make  up  life  and  the 
adaptation  of  the  universe  to  its  perpetuation.  But 
for  the  intelligence  of  man  to  comprehend  it,  the 
beauty  and  harmony  of  the  universe  would  have  no 

2S3 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

more  significance  than  if  they  never  had  existed. 
Life  is  the  one  thing  for  which  all  other  things 
are  created.  The  philosophers  say  that  force  and 
matter  are  indestructible.  The  coal  that  glows  in 
the  grate  and  warms  me  while  I  pen  these  lines  is 
giving  off  heat  and  light  which  it  received  millions 
of  years  ago  when  the  sunbeams  were  falling  over 
the  jungles  of  the  carboniferous  age.  These 
molecules  of  black  carbon  have  held  that  same  solar 
energy  in  latent  potentiality  while  sea  bottoms  have 
been  elevated  into  mountain  ranges,  and  millions  of 
generations  of  animal  life  have  come  and  gone. 
When  that  energy  is  liberated,  it  is  exactly  the  same 
in  amount  as  it  was  when  it  went  into  that  latent 
form.  If  it  is  converted  by  way  of  steam  into 
mechanical  energy,  and  this  in  turn  converted  into 
electricity,  and  the  electricity  reduced  to  light  and 
heat  again,  after  making  allowance  for  loss  by  fric- 
tion, we  shall  find  that  we  have  exactly  the  same 
amount  of  heat  and  light  we  started  with.  Energy 
may  change  its  form  but  it  is  never  lost.  The  coal 
which  has  been  reduced  to  ashes  has  simply  changed 
its  chemical  form.  The  pure  carbon  has  united  with 
the  oxygen  of  the  air  to  form  carbonic  acid  gas, 
while  the  calcium  and  other  fixed  elements  have 
resolved  themselves  into  cinders. 
284 


ON   THE   ANVIL  OF  THOUGHT 

I  think  we  might,  with  the  same  propriety,  draw 
the  same  conclusion  of  mental  energy  and  its  corol- 
lary life.  We  cannot  it  is  true  subject  it  to  the 
same  experiments  and  computations  which  we  can 
heat  and  electricity.  But  the  fact  that  it  so  far 
transcends  all  other  forces  that  it  is  the  regulator 
of  them  all  is  proof  that  it  is  elemental  in  its 
nature  and  perpetual  in  its  duration. 

The  changes  we  perceive  in  the  universe  are  but 
readjustments.  The  component  elements  abide  for- 
ever. Every  turn  of  the  kaleidoscope  produces  a 
new  symmetrical  picture,  but  the  pieces  of  glass 
which  produce  them  are  always  the  same. 

It  is  not  with  the  thought  of  discrediting  tradi- 
tion that  these  observations  have  been  elaborated. 
We  must  all  acknowledge  the  great  obligation  we 
are  under  to  those  crystallize' I  expressions  of  faith 
that  come  down  to  us  from  the  ages  in  the  name 
of  scripture.  They  have  kept  alive  the  hope  of 
immortality  in  the  human  heart  through  all  the  dark 
days  when  religion  vacillated  rind  science  doubted. 
I  write  to  review  the  proposition  of  immortality 
from  another  tangent  and  shall  be  happy  indeed 
if  I  have  aided  in  the  least  degrr^f  to  arouse  inter- 
est in  the  one  greatest  of  all  qut;.tions,  "If  a  man 
die  shall  he  live  again?" 

285 


CHAPTER  XII 


RETROSPECTIVE 


IT  is  springtime  again.  The  mantle  of  green  has 
spread  over  the  hillside  and  down  the  valley. 
The  air  is  full  of  the  fragrance  of  flowers,  and  the 
warblers  have  returned  from  the  southland.  All 
nature  is  attired  in  her  richest  robes.  The  sun  is 
pouring  its  flood  of  golden  glory,  this  time  from  the 
western  sky. 

Twenty  years  and  more  have  passed  away  since 
that  fateful  morning  in  the  springtime  before,  when 
the  group  of  children  who  were  to  figure  in  the 
annals  of  this  little  volume  played  the  game  of 
chance  with  the  daisy's  petals.  Twenty  years  with 
all  their  changes  have  rolled  over  their  heads.  The 
play  world  became  a  world  of  stern  facts. 

Into  the  drama  of  life  some  entered  to  play  the 
role  of  tragedian,  and  some  to  play  the  role  of 
clown,  and  some  to  play  the  role  of  hero.  The 
kaleidoscope  has  turned  and  turned,  and  now  we 
are  to  look  at  the  final  arrangement. 

The  processes  of  nature  have  known  but  little 
286 


RETROSPECTIVE 

change.  The  song  of  the  bird  is  unmodified;  the 
blush  of  the  peach  blossom  is  neither  brighter  nor 
duller  than  it  was  twenty  years  ago.  But  when  we 
look  at  the  people  who  have  witnessed  this  unchang- 
ing panorama  of  nature  for  twenty  years,  we  are  ap- 
palled to  note  the  transformation  which  has  been 
wrought  into  their  countenance  by  the  fast  flying 
seasons.  They  were  intoxicated  then  by  the  dreams 
of  childhood,  but  they  are  sobered  now  by  the  stern 
facts  of  life.  We  are  drifting,  slowly  drifting,  to- 
ward the  great  abyss.  We  console  ourselves  with 
the  thought  that  all  mankind  are  subjected  to  the 
same  process.  The  years  swept  over  our  heads  with 
such  rapidity  that  we  gasp  at  the  thought  of  them. 
We  look  at  withered  age,  palsied  and  trembling,  and 
wonder  what  particular  form  it  will  assume  in  our 
particular  case  when  we  arrive  at  the  windrow  and 
are  ready  to  be  gathered  in.  God  pity  the  one  who 
pins  his  faith  and  hope  to  the  meagre  events  of 
these  few  fljeeing  years. 

A  little  hut  in  the  midst  of  a  vacant  field,  'far  away 
from  the  thoroughfares  of  the  town,  still  stands  as 
the  only  indicator  of  the  tragic  story  of  Harriet  and 
Henry.  The  rafters  are  tumbling  in.  The  windows 
and  the  door  have  long  since  been  den^olished. 
Weeds  have  grown  rank  all  about  it  and  almost 
287 


AFTER    TWENTY    YEARS 

submerged  its  decaying  walls.  The  birds  for  many 
years  had  built  their  nests  under  the  protecting 
eaves,  but  now  even  they  have  forsaken  it.  The 
meanest  creature  of  the  field  has  disdained  it  as  a 
home,  and  left  it  to  the  spell  of  desolation  which 
time  invokes  upon  all  ephemeral  products  of  the 
hand  of  man. 

One  of  the  saddest  chapters  in  life  is  that  which 
records  the  dismantling  of  the  old  home  which  pro- 
tected the  family  circle  we  have  each  belonged  to. 
Into  a  new  vortex  each  one  of  us  has  been  hurled, 
but  we  are  bound  to  the  old  eddying  center  by  a 
thousand  sentiments  which  time  can  never  dissever. 
The  last  stroke  of  dissolution  of  the  family  compact 
is  the  dismantling  of  the  old  home. 

In  a  quiet  corner  of  the  country  church-yard  a 
meagre  little  unpolished  grave-stone  marks  the  place 
where  our  one  time  winsome  little  Harriet  sleeps 
the  last  long  sleep  and  dreams  amidst  the  scenes 
of  her  fitful  career.  Long  ago  the  partner  of  her 
afflictions  committed  an  oflFense  against  the  laws 
of  his  country  and  became  a  refugee  from  justice. 
The  numerous  children  who  bore  his  dishonored 
name  were  left  to  make  their  way.  as  best  they  could 
by  the  aid  of  kindred  and  kindly  friends  who  came  to 
the  rescue. 

288 


RETROSPECTIVE 

But  even  the  orphan  nature  has  its  compensa- 
tions. The  hard  struggle  for  position  and  place  de- 
velops initiative,  and  often  proves  in  the  end  to  be 
an  advantage  instead  of  an  encumbrance.  To  the 
credit  of  the  children  of  this  unfortunate  home'  they 
each  gave  promise  of  becoming  wholesome,  inde- 
pendent citizens.  And  this  is  a  full  realization  of 
our  expectations  in  the  average  individual.    ' 

In  the  potter's  field  in  a  city  far  away  there  is  one 
grave  unmarked,  unkept,  unfrequented.  The  very 
grass  has  refused  to  grow  upon  it,  as  though  it  were 
blighted  with  a  curse.  We  cannot  imagine  the  steril- 
ity of  this  particular  spot  of  earth  anything  but  acci- 
dental; the  disintegrating  clay  of  the  culprit  would 
have  as  much  value  as  fertilizer  and  food  for  worms 
as  the  body  of  a  saint,  and  that  is  the  final  lot  of  all 
of  us  so  far  as  this  earthly  part  of  us  is  concerned. 
Our  modem  conception  of  insanity  and  crime  and 
their  relationship  to  the  defective  human  machine, 
has  changed  completely  the  attitude  of  society  to- 
ward the  deceased  criminal  and  the  suicide.  They 
are  no  longer  buried  at  the  cross-road  nor  otherwise 
marked  for  the  scorn  and  derision  of  future  genera- 
tions. We  can  look  with  pity  at  the  last  resting 
place  of  our  poor  unfortunate  Jim  and  think  of  him 
as  one  of  God's  creatures  who  was  cast  in  a  defective 
289 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

mold,  and  manifested  in  his  life  and  death  the  obli- 
quity which  resulted  therefrom. 

Of  Samuel  we  need  say  nothing  more  than  that 
he  lives  in  the  memory  of  all  who  knew  him  as  one  of 
the  rarest,  choicest  personalities  it  has  been  their 
privilege  to  meet.  The  grassy  mound  which  arches 
over  his  earthly  remains  has  been  wet  with  many 
a  tear.  The  mother  and  helpless  brothers  and  sisters 
have  found  friends  in  their  hour  of  need,  and  the 
years  have  brought  reconciliation  for  a  condition 
that  at  one  time  seemed  intolerable.  When  the 
gloom  of  death  settles  upon  a  household  and  the 
grave  opens  to  recieve  one  from  the  family  circle, 
it  seems  to  the  rest  of  them  that  life  has  lost  all 
interest  and  that  they  can  never  know  happiness  or 
satisfaction  again.  But  Time  is  the  magician  who 
plays  with  human  emotions  and  changes  them  at 
will.  When  he  waves  His  wand  over  the  bowed 
head,  it  lifts  itself  erect  again  and  in  the  new  adjust- 
ment finds  peace  and  consolation  and  even  satisfac- 
tion in  the  memory  which 'was  at  one  time  so  painful. 

Of  Joseph,  the  type  of  the  pessimist,  there  is  noth- 
ing more  to  be  said. 

When  a  man  becomes  seasoned  in  the  thought 
that  he  is  the  antithesis  of  all  other  men  and  that 
society  is  in  conspiracy  against  him,  there  is  not 
290 


RETROSPECTIVE 

much  probability  that  he  will  ever  change  his  mind. 
Obliquity  of  character  in  youth  is  not  absolutely 
hopeless,  because  the  reasoning  of  maturity  may 
change  the  viewpoint.  But  when  a  man  whose  hair 
is  turning  gray  gives  himself  over  to  vice  and  in- 
iquity, his  case  is  pitiful  because  it  is  so  hopeless. 

In  a  great  city  far  away,  there  is  a  beautiful  brown 
stone  mansion,  surrounded  by  gardens  and  lawns 
and  beds  of  flowers,  all  laid  out  with  the  skill  of  an 
artist.  We  can  pardon  its  tenant  if  there  is  some- 
thing of  the  suggestion  of  whim  in  the  way  he  has 
tempered  together  rare  exotics  and  evergreens  and 
marble  statues  into  a  composite  landscape,  for 
genius  claims  the  right  to  be  whimsical  if  she  pleases, 
and  we  must  grant  her  poetic  license  which  she 
adopts  without  asking  questions. 

Our  Richard  married  a  lady  of  rare  quality  from 
one  of  the  old  colonial  families,  and  many  happy 
children  came  to  grace  their  home.  His  studio  is 
the  eddying  center  of  the  best  element  of  the  art 
fraternity  of  his  locality,  and  a  wealthy  patronage 
has  poured  treasure  into  his  coffers  to  his  heart's 
content.  We  cannot  imagine  any  element  of  perfect 
happiness  which  fate  has  failed  to  bestow  upon  him. 

Standing  at  the  meridian  of  life  as  he  is,  with  all 
his  fondest  hopes  perfectly  realized,  barring  acci- 
291 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

dents,  we  can  predict  years  of  happiness  yet  to  come. 
His  life  is  surely  a  vindication  of  the  law  of  compen- 
sation,'  which  applies  to  all  people,  great  and  small. 

We  will  recall  David  to  the  stand  and  allow  him 
to  finish  our  case  with  a  thanksgiving  soliloquy 
which  explains  itself.  The  indulgent  reader  who 
has  had  the  patience  to  follow  these  narratives  has 
long  ago  learned  that  their  purpose  is  not  to  exploit 
personality,  but  to  get  at  some  of  the  real  problems 
of  life  in  a  tangible  form  for  the  admonition  of 
youth  and  for  the  consolation  of  all  those  who  have 
known  the  struggle  of  life  and  fought  its  battles, 
sometimes  in  faith  and  sometimes  in  doubt  and  un- 
certainty. The  aim  has  been  to  look  at  life  from 
many  different  angles,  to  point  out  the  admonition  of 
its  nobler  phases,  and  to  hold  up  in  the  lime  light  its 
weak  and  unprofitable  moods. 

Without  cross  question,  then,  or  rebuttal  we  will 
let  David  have  his  final  say  and  then  submit  our  case 
tc  the  jury  in  the  hope  that  they  will  be  indulgent 
and  judge  charitably  the  faults  and  the  failings  of  an 
inexperienced  advocate  who  appears  in  court  for  the 
first  time. 

"I  am  musing  as  I  sit  in  the  midst  of  the  books 
which  have  accumulated  around  me  through  all  the 
years  since  my  childhood,  after  a  thanksgiving  din- 
292 


RETROSPECTIVE 

ner  of  ample  proportions  and  appetizing  quality, 
and  relating  to  myself  in  a  mental  way  the  things 
for  which  I  have  to  be  thankful. 

"I  place,  first,  my  friends.  They  are  the  greatest 
asset  to  any  life.  Without  them  the  other  things  in 
the  world  would  not  be  worth  having.  The  friend 
who  can  look  with  charity  on  'our  faults,  and  bear 
with  patience  our  untoward  moods;  who  can  weep 
with  us  when  we  weep,  and  exult  with  us  in  our 
hours  of  victory,  is  one 'of  the  greatest  g^fts  of  God. 
And  we  should  be  thankful  for  all  such  who  have 
come  by  chance  or  choice  into  our  circle. 

"As  I  ply  the  well  worn  keys  of  this  writing 
machine,  I  am  pestered  with  busy  little  hands  which 
are  anxious  with  the  first  opportunity  to  mar  my 
orthography  with  misplaced  letters  or  my  syntax 
with  words  foreign  to  the  text  in  which  they  appear. 
I  see  little  blue  eyes,  bubbling  over  with  mischief, 
and  beaming  with  interest,  and  as  I  bear  with  pa- 
tience the  pranks  they  are  wont  to  play  on  me  I  say, 
'Thank  God  for  these  little  sparks  of  the  Divine  fire 
which  have  come  to  illuminate  my  home!' 

"On  the  sofa  by  my  side  as  I  write  is  the  one  who 
has  been  with  me  through  all  the  process  of  the  de- 
velopment of  this  aggregation  of  material  things  and 
human  fixtures  in  various  degrees  of  gfrowth  which 
293 


AFTER     TWENTY    YEARS 

go  to  make  up  a  home,  who  has  kept  the  heterogene- 
ous mixture  in  precise  adjustment  and  all  the  bear- 
ings lubricated,  and  who  has  withal  shed  over  it  all 
an  influence  of  kindness  and  unselfish  devotion,  and 
irtelligent  adaptation  of  means  to  ends,  and  I  say, 
'Thank  God  for  her!' 

"I  look  over  the  varied  stock  of  books  which  are 
upon  the  shelves  before  me,  some  fresh  from  the  shop 
of  the  printer,  and  some  begrimed  with  finger  marks 
of  childish  hands,  and  spotted  with  tear-stains  of 
early  emotions  which  came  to  me  away  back  in  the 
morning  of  my  life.  And  I  say  'Thank  God  for  these 
mute  companions  of  my  earliest  years  and  of  my 
days  of  maturity.  From  them  I  have  received  such 
thrills  as  only  they  can  comprehend  who  have  lived 
in  the  atmosphere  of  literature. 

'T  recall  the  days  of  trial  and  the  hours  of  tempta- 
tion which  have  beset  my  pathway,  and  think  of  the 
distress  that  one  step  to  the  right  or  to  the  left  in 
critical  moments  might  have  brought  into  my  life, 
and  I  thank  God  that  I  have  been  spared  the  humilia- 
tion of  capitulating  to  weakness  or  to  sin. 

"Success  has  not  been  without  effort.  The  world  is 
not  built  upon  the  plan  of  something  for  nothing. 
But  I  thank  God  for  that  original  impulse  which 
made  the  effort  possible. 

294 


RETROSPECTIVE 

"I  look  out  of  my  window  and  see  white  fleecy 
clouds  projecting  themselves  against  a  background  of 
beautiful  blue,  and  I  am  stirred  with  the  message 
they  bring  to  my  soul  from  over  the  abyss — of  the 
aesthetic  method  of  the  great  Artisan  who  made 
hiraven  and  earth  on  plans  of  symmetry  and  form  and 
color.  I  see  the  empty  garden  beds  where  beautiful 
flowers  were  wont  to  display  their  gorgeous  colors 
in  the  summer  sun,  and  I  am  thrilled  with  memories 
that  come  to  me  from  all  the  years  which  have  known 
the  delight  of  summer  flowers.  I  thank  God  not  only 
for  the  beautiful  things  of  the  world  but  for  that 
measure  of  aesthetic  taste  which  enables  me  to  re- 
ceive and  appropriate  their  Divine  message. 

"And  so  I  am  satisfied  with  life,  and  happy  on  this 
thanksgiving  day  that  I  have  such  a  catalogue  of 
things  to  be  thankful  for." 


295 


UC  SOUTHERN  Rf  GION/lL  LIBRARY  FACILfTY 


A    001  307  274    9 


